All Fleur wanted was to have some peace and quiet. Will she be able to find what she is looking for in Ponyville?
All Fleur wanted was to have some peace and quiet and get away from the constant barrage of nosy questions from Equestria's tabloid press.
Hoping to find what she is looking for she travels to Ponyville to meet some old friends. Will she find what she is looking for or will the press find her instead?
Cover Image was hastily assembled by myself using some pictures found via google. A teen rating because of...well....Lyra basically.
The story will be released as a few smaller chapters at a time for easier reading. Enjoy.
It was maybe the most prestigious street in all of Canterlot. Only the most wealthy and influential of ponies could afford one of the ludicrously expensive mansions here. There were only twelve mansions on the street, each in pristine condition thanks to the numerous unseen ponies constantly making sure everything was in top shape for the owners.
Entire squads of gardeners and cleaning crews made their twice daily rounds over the properties making sure that not a single leaf was lying on the ground or that the grass in one of the enormous gardens was slightly longer in one area than the other. All of those tasks were done unseen by the owners. In their worldview hardworking lower class ponies should not be seen unless absolutely necessary. Such was the way of thinking for most of them save for very few of the Canterlot elite.
One such pony just arrived at the front gate of a large mansion, maybe even the grandest of them all. The carriage bringing her slowed to a stop and the door was opened by the driver. As a delicate white hoof stepped out of the carriage a blinding staccato of flashlights erupted in the otherwise dark street.
Amidst the lights the pony exited the carriage and posed for a brief moment. It was almost second nature to Fleur de Lis. As Equestria's premier model it was her job to pose and look her best at every single moment in case the press or more precisely the paparazzi would be waiting for her to take pictures.
Fleur smiled her most photogenic smile possible and made her way through the opening gates. She relied on instinct alone to guide her through the gate as the barrage of light effectively blinded her. Some of the reporters asked her questions, some harmless and some questions bordering on shameless. Fleur merely smiled and didn’t reply to any of them. The gate closed behind her, but that didn’t deter the photographers from taking more pictures of her from between the bars of the gate.
Only as Fleur entered the mansion and the large heavy door fall shut behind her did they stop taking pictures. Fleur’s smile vanished the instant the door had closed. She let her head hang low and let out a tired sigh.
She strained to hear any kind of sound coming from within her home. As nothing reached her ears after a few moments she concluded that she was in fact all alone in the large mansion.
Fancy Pants, her husband that was equally well known throughout Equestria, was absent for once. He most likely was still tied up in the meeting with some of Canterlot’s big wigs back in the castle. Fleur had been attending Hoity Toity’s latest fashion show and had modeled some of his designs as a favor for Photo Finish and was actually still wearing one of the elaborate dresses. As was predicted she had come home first. The meetings that Fancy attended usually lasted for a very long time.
She was glad that she was alone for the moment. Today was a day off for their staff, a cook and two maids to be precise. All three of them were immensely happy at their employment. Other upper-crust ponies would act snobbish towards the staff or treat them with disdain. Fleur and Fancy both treated them as a kind of extended family, taking time to talk to them and also listen to their opinions and problems. Happy employees worked harder and also enjoyed doing their chores. In all the staff had very little if anything at all to complain about. The pay was very good and had a lot of free time as both Fleur and Fancy were hardly ever at home.
Fleur both relished in being alone for a moment and hated at not having somepony to talk to. With a heavy sigh she made a beeline towards the kitchen.
Nearly two hours later Fancy Pants arrived at home.
He had not been met with as much members of the press waiting for him as Fleur had, but they were still there. Like Fleur he didn’t react to any of their questions and just ignored the flashes of light. As he closed the front door he knew not all was well in his home as he spotted Fleur’s dress strewn about in the entrance hall.
He followed the trail of clothing towards the kitchen and found it empty. A drawer had been opened and not closed back up again. He used his magic to shut it and had a suspicion of what was going on. With slightly hastened steps he ascended the large dominating staircase leading upstairs. The quiet sound of music reached his ears as he trotted towards Fleur’s private room.
Fancy hesitated before knocking on the door. Both of them had their own room to take refuge in and it was an unwritten rule that they didn’t want to be disturbed when inside. His knock was answered with a grunt from inside. Fancy Pants drew a breath and opened the door.
He was greeted by a classical piece of music that he instantly recognized as something from J.S. Buck. The first thing he saw was Fleur lying on her favorite couch. It was a hideous shade of green and had to have been out of style for at least a decade or two. Fleur loved it for its soothing texture and total absence of springs. She had it during her days in university and was very reluctant to part with it. Fancy could understand its sentimental value as he had a few odd pieces lying around in his own room that he didn’t want to get rid of.
What set off an alarm in his head was the objects in front of the couch. Two large empty ice cream buckets, a can of whipped cream and an equally empty glass of amaretto cherries.
Double chocolate chip with caramel swirls….this is bad.
“Fleur?” Fancy Pants slowly circled around the couch to see his wife. “What is the matter, my Dear?”
Fleur’s head popped up from the depths of her plush couch. He noticed that Fleur had not chosen to use a spoon for her spontaneous consumption of vast amounts of ice cream, evident by a chocolate ring around her face. Obviously she had stuck her head in the bucket to reach the very bottom.
“I can’t take it anymore!” Fleur lamented and rolled on her back all four legs sticking out to her sides.
“Too much ice cream?” Fancy joked and stepped closer to his beloved.
“Them!” Fleur gestured with a hoof towards the window.
Fancy didn’t have to guess to know who she was referring to. At practically every hour of every day there was at least one nosy reporter or photographer hanging around their estate. They had called the guards a few times to try and deal with them, but the reporters said they had freedom of the press and as long as they didn’t actually enter the premises there was nothing anypony could do.
“Every breath I take; every move I make, they are always watching me!” Fleur clutched her head in between her front hooves and tried to cower deeper into the soft fabric.
“It comes with fame unfortunately.” Fancy Pants shrugged and gently laid a hoof on Fleur’s shoulder.
Fleur released her head from her grip and instead grabbed Fancy’s hoof. “If I see one more flashlight I’ll snap! Everywhere I go they are there….waiting. Waiting for me to do something…anything. It is ridiculous!”
Fancy wrestled his hoof from his wife’s surprisingly strong grip and lovingly ran it through her mane. As he took a breath to reply to her woes she only just started with her rant.
“I can’t even eat in peace anymore!” Fleur rapidly shook her head. “Pictures of me are plastered all of the newspapers when I just eat an apple! Then they create these absurd theories about my shape and weight based on me eating an apple. They never ask about it….no wait, they do ask! And some of the others things they ask me are just obscene!”
“I know, Dear.” Fancy repeatedly ran his hoof through her mane and slowly extended his reach to her back, trying to relax some of the tension in Fleur.
“I just can’t continue like this!” Fleur’s voice slightly cracked. She sobbed once and rose up from her couch only to latch on to Fancy Pants with a hug. He instantly returned it and kept up his soothing motions with his hooves.
“Do you know what you need?” Fancy asked once the little breakdown had passed. “A nice little vacation.”
“I could do with that.” Fleur replied and wiped a few stray tears from her eyes. With a sigh she continued. “But it wouldn’t really help. Do you remember our last vacation? They were all over the place taking pictures. I don’t feel like going through another wet-mane incident.”
“You did look exceptionally beautiful though.” Fancy chose not to inform her that he actually had framed one of her pictures with a wet mane and had hung it up in his own private room.
They stayed where they were in silence for a moment. Fleur slowly regretting having pigged out on ice cream and Fancy thinking about a solution for her problem.
“How about you take a vacation by yourself?” Fancy suggested.
“That would be even worse.” Fleur shook her head. “When you are there they have at least a bit of restraint. Without you they try to take some pictures of parts I best not mention.”
“They wouldn’t have to know that you are on vacation.” An idea had popped up in his head on how to give Fleur a bit of peace and quiet.
“What do you mean?” Fleur broke the embrace to look him in the eye.
“In the week after next we are supposed to attend a few gallery openings, shows and such in Las Pegasus remember?”
“Yes, I remember.” Fleur sighed. Las Pegasus weather always wreaked havoc on her mane. More fodder for the presses.
“How about instead we make them think you came along with me, but in reality you went someplace else. Someplace nice and quiet and away from all the larger cities.”
“Where?” Fleur was intrigued.
“How about Ponyville?” Fancy Pants smiled at his wife. “Rarity has kindly invited you a few times in the past already, but you were always too busy to take her offer.”
Fleur put a hoof to her chin in thought. It was true that Rarity had invited her a few times, albeit with the intention to discuss fashion.
“Bon Bon and her friends live there as well.” Fancy sugarcoated his suggestion a bit more.
Fleur had kept in touch with the sweet maker she had met in Canterlot a few years ago via letters. At the time she had been longing for some regular ponies to simply talk to and Bon Bon had fit the picture perfectly. Of course she had learned that the sweet maker and her marefriend were not necessarily what one would call regular ponies, but she enjoyed the letters she sent and received from Bon Bon.
“It sounds like a good idea.” Fleur said after a moment of contemplation.
“Excellent!” Fancy Pants grinned wide. “And I think I already have an idea on how to get you there unseen.”
Rarity had replied instantly and wrote that she would be overjoyed to have Fleur as a guest for a week. Fleur had replied that she would not impose on her hospitality and rather stay in a hotel. As was almost to be expected, Rarity wrote back that she would take care of everything.
The only thing left in Fleur’s path to vacation was the press. And for that problem they would have to rely on Dusty Feathers, one of their maids.
Dusty had been working for Fleur and Fancy now for nearly six years and was more than happy to help them out and keep quiet about the plan they had shared with her.
They had chosen Dusty as she not only had a very similar coat to Fleur, but also was nearly the same height. Dusty was a little bulkier than the model and being a pegasus also had the problem of having wings. Both of those things could easily be concealed by a summer dress that would also take care of the different cutie marks. Dusty’s mane was light grey almost white and could easily by dyed to resemble Fleur’s color. Her eyes could be covered up by sunglasses and hide the fact that they had a different color than Fleur’s. The last item on the list was Dusty’s absence of a horn, something that was fixed by simply wearing a hat.
Fleur put on the exact same outfit. Side by side there were still noticeable differences, but in the crowd at Canterlot’s main station it couldn’t be noticed. There was one last item on the list and it could possibly blow the entire idea up. Dusty’s voice was vastly different than Fleur’s. If things went as planned Dusty wouldn’t even need to say anything and Fleur could possibly catch a little break for once.
With the final steps discussed there was not much to do until the day after tomorrow. The day when Fleur could possibly finally relax for once and not have to pose constantly. She felt anticipation building up inside her and could hardly keep the smile from forming on her lips.
Fleur arrived at the main station early that morning.
As predicted a swarm of reporters and photographers followed her every step since she left her home. Unlike previous encounters Fleur answered some of the questions directed at her.
“Where is your husband?” A stallion asked.
“Fancy Pants has a few pressing issues he has to attend to before meeting me in Las Pegasus.” Fleur kept a straight face and briefly stopped to pose a bit for them. “It will give me some time to see some of the sights on my own.”
“Anything in particular you would like to see?” A mare called out.
“I hear the sight from Hooves Dam is beautiful this time of year.” Fleur turned slowly once around and posed for them some more.
“The water sprays all over the place up there. Did you bring an umbrella? If so which color is it?”
“I did not pack an umbrella.” Fleur held a delicate hoof to her mouth in mock shock. “Oh, dear. I might get my mane wet. Or even might get wet all over.”
Fleur expertly flicked her mane once and just ever so slightly flicked her tail. The effect was immediate as the flashes flared up once more and reporters began scribbling furiously into their notepads.
She barely managed not to grin. The bait she had laid out had been swallowed whole and she knew from experience that droves of reporters would now be waiting for her at that landmark hoping to catch a nice picture of her.
Too bad I won’t be there.
A few more questions were answered to wet their appetites and Fleur excused herself to go into the bathroom with only ten minutes to spare to catch her train. Some more obnoxious reporters tried to follow her inside, but after some very stern looks from nearby guards they decided against it.
Fleur grinned as she saw that only one other stall was occupied. She quickly tapped her hoof three times against it. Instantly the door unlocked and revealed Dusty already dressed up in the planned outfit.
“All set?” Dusty asked with a grin and donned her sunglasses.
“I have no doubt they will follow you.” Fleur replied at quickly began undressing. Years of being a model had given her plenty of experience switching outfits in only a few seconds. “You remember the plan?”
“Of course.” Dusty replied and stowed her boss’ old outfit into her own saddlebag. “Don’t say a word until I am on the train. Once there I stay in costume until we reach Las Pegasus. There I lose them by taking off the disguise. They’ll spend ages trying to figure out what happened.”
“Perfect!” Fleur donned her own pair of sunglasses. “Thank you, Dusty.”
“My pleasure.” Dusty nodded once to her boss and then confidently strode out the bathroom into the flashlights of waiting reporters.
As instructed she ignored all questions and took the direct route to her train. Fleur counted to twenty and left the bathroom. It was strange to suddenly be free of reporters. The feeling of being just another pony felt fantastic. With a slight bounce in her step she made her way in the opposite direction that Dusty had taken. She had a train to catch.
“Wait, wait, wait.” Scoop laid a hoof on her photographer’s chest and held him back.
“What?” Quick Shot frowned at his partner in gossip. “We still need to get tickets for the train. I ain’t gonna miss the opportunity to get some pictures of Fleur all wet…..if ya know what I mean.”
“Something isn’t right.” Scoop ignored Quick Shot’s innuendo and frowned. Ever since Fleur had returned from her trip to the bathroom something had been bugging her.
“Another one of your hunches?” Quick Shot stopped trying to move towards the ticket booth.
The other unicorn had a sixth sense sometimes when it came to all things worthy of gossip. He had learned to trust her instincts as it had led to some excellent material in the past.
Scoop rubbed her chin with a hoof and blew a lock of her bright blue mane out of her eyes. She glanced over some of the other reporters still trying to get answers from Fleur sitting in her compartment by shouting them and hoping she could hear them through the glass.
“It’s the hat.” Scoop finally said.
“What about it? It’s the same one as before.”
“No…yes…it’s….AHA!” Scoop thrust a hoof up as the answer came to her. “Don’t you think it's pulled a little bit too far down?”
“Uh…maybe?” Quick Shot was no expert when it came to hats or anything fashion related. He was just the photographer after all, thinking was not required and Scoop’s job for the team.
“Impossible to pull it that far down if you have a horn.” Scoop grinned and turned towards the ticket booth.
“So…what are you saying?” Quick Shot followed his partner closely.
“She switched places.” Scoop paused for a moment trying to piece the puzzle together. “No doubt she dressed up one of her maids. Dusty most likely, they are about the same height.”
“Why?”
“To get rid of us of course.” Scoop rolled her eyes. Her partner could sometimes be rather slow on the uptake. “Why else do you think she baited us with all those answers she gave us.”
“So…no wet Fleur?” Quick Shot sounded genuinely sad.
“Get your mind out of the gutter.”
“Why? That’s our job!”
“Hmm, I guess you are right about that.” Scoop had to admit that he had a point. She already had a few good lines prepared for a soaked Fleur, but that apparently would not happen.
Scoop waited in line in front of the ticket booth. Luckily only two other ponies were trying to purchase tickets.
“How do you do that?” Quick Shot asked as he watched other photographers still scrambling to get a good picture of Fleur.
“I have a nose for those kind of things.” Scoop answered and stepped up to the booth when it was her turn.
“How can I help you?” The pony in the booth asked friendly with a smile on her lips.
“Are there any other trains leaving soon apart from the one to Las Pegasus?” Scoop asked equally as friendly.
“There will be a train leaving for Manehatten shortly.” The booth pony informed her. “The train to Ponyville just left about five minutes ago.”
Scoop’s ears perked up at the last piece of information. “Ponyville? When is the next train going there?”
“In three and a half hours. Would you like to buy some tickets?”
“Two, please.” Scoop rummaged around in the bag around her neck for the bits needed to pay.
“Ponyville? What do we want there?” Quick Shot moaned at the thought of going to some tiny little village. He needed the busy life of a major city to feel at home and not some boring little town in the middle of nowhere.
“Fleur went there. I am sure of it.” Scoop nodded to herself to reaffirm her decision.
“What would she want there? Do farmwork?”
“Get away from us of course.” Scoop grinned an evil grin and took the tickets. “No way that’s going to happen.”
“Wait….Ponyville….Isn’t that where that Heartstrings mare lives?” Quick Shot asked as they moved towards the platform where their train would be leaving in a few hours.
“Yes, I think so. Why?”
“Don’t you remember the court order?”
“Pffft, I can’t be expected to remember every single court order.” Scoop slightly winced as she rubbed her left side in reflex at the memory of the mint green mare. “Besides, the court order states that she is not allowed to come closer than fifty trots near me. But I don’t care about her, I just care about Fleur.”
Quick Shot shrugged and followed his partner towards the platform on the other end of the station.
Despite priding themselves on having excellent perception neither of them had noticed that they had been closely observed by another pair of paparazzi.
“You see them?” Dirt Sheet nudged his photographer in the side. The beige pegasus mare lowered her camera to see what her partner was talking about.
“Who?” Rapid Flash blew a bubble with her chewing gum.
“Scoop and her lackey.” Dirt Sheet watched them trot away from the train where Fleur was supposed to be in. “Something is going on.”
“How can you tell?” The pegasus popped her bubble and noisily continued chewing her gum.
“I got a nose for these kind of things. Come on.”
Dirt Sheet casually trotted up to the ticket booth and was greeted by its occupant in a friendly tone.
“Those two reporters just now….” The unicorn hesitated to call Scoop and her partner reporters. As far as he was concerned they were just unprofessional hacks. If one needed a juicy story rich with totally unbiased gossip then he was the pony to turn to. Of course every single paparazzi had the same opinion about themselves. “Did they buy a ticket? If so….to where?”
“They purchased tickets for the Ponyville Express in three and a half hours.” The salespony saw no harm in passing on that piece of information.
“Two tickets to Ponyville then please.” Dirt Sheet dropped the bits on the counter and took the tickets a moment later.
“Ponyville? Really?” Rapid Flash arched an eyebrow.
“You can be sure there is something interesting going on there if those two leeches are going. Come on, let’s go.”
As the two reporters followed the first pair they were unaware that they had been closely observed by another pair. These in turn also asked the salespony in the ticket booth where the previous pair had been going. This chain of events continued for quite some time. Each reporter stating that they had a nose for those kind of things if asked why they were following the previous pair of reporters. A nosy bunch they were indeed.
Of the course of the next hour the salespony grew tired of having to repeat the same answer again and again. In the end a solution was found by simply sticking a sign in the window indicating that all reporters had been heading towards Ponyville.
Just as the salespony was beginning to think that no more nosy reporters would bother her with the same question over and over again a very tall, frightfully thin earthpony stallion appeared at the booth. He wore a black suit with a white vest and red tie. Strangely he had shaved his mane completely off leaving his head only covered in his perfectly white coat.
His eyes were a very light yellow, almost completely white. The salespony shrunk back at his unnerving stare. He very slowly directed his gaze towards the little sign and equally slowly took some bits from a pocket in his suit out with a hoof.
The salespony just quickly nodded and gave him his two tickets. Without another word he turned around and left towards the platform for the Ponyville train. As she watched him leave she briefly wondered if he really wanted two tickets as he seemed to be alone. The question was answered quickly as another stallion suddenly popped up in front of the booth slamming his front hooves against the window causing a loud bang. The salespony shrieked in fright and fell off her chair. The stallion with the greasy brown mop of a mane on top his head laughed cruelly and turned to follow the other strange stallion. While lying on the floor and clutching her chest to calm her rapidly beating heart the salespony decided that she needed a new job.
At least that was Fleur’s first impression as she anxiously watched the village grow closer from the window of her compartment. She felt something that she had not felt for a very long time. She felt at ease. The train ride had been pleasant, apart from the conductor to check her ticket nopony had bothered her.
She still wore her disguise from the station just to make sure it would stay that way a little longer. The ruse they had used in Canterlot had seemingly worked. Not a single reporter was to be seen, something that felt like heaven to Fleur.
As the train came to a screeching stop she couldn’t help but smile at the prospect of finally having some time to relax. With a bounce she exited the train and looked around.
Fancy Pants had been here before and had gushed over the quaint little town. He had signed a contract with Rarity to distribute her clothing line in Canterlot. Her previous partner, Hoity Toity, had not been honest with her and tried to maximize his own profits at her expense. Fancy Pants would not do something like that and Rarity happily signed her new line over to him. He had mentioned a lot of pink ponies all over the town when he was here and had laughed. It had been unfortunate that Fleur had been modeling in Manehatten at the time and couldn’t join him. But now she was here and decided to take it as easy as possible for the next week.
None of the ponies entering and exiting the train seemed to recognize her save for one. With a wide beaming smile and perfectly styled mane her host for her time in Ponyville came trotting over to her.
“Fleur, darling!” Rarity beamed her widest smile possible. “So good to see you again!”
“It’s been too long!” Fleur exchanged a quick hug with the white unicorn.
Fleur normally did not get along with fashion designers all that well. To shallow or too self obsessed about themselves were attributes that seemed to be common amongst them. While it was true that Rarity might appear that way at first glance as well, it soon became apparent that there was much more to the mare than met the eye.
It intrigued Fleur and she found she might have something in common with the fashionista. Perhaps they would have time to see what it was while she was here. Previous encounters had left little time to talk about things not revolving around the world of fashion.
“Welcome to Ponyville!” Rarity turned towards the town behind her and encompassed the view with a wave of her hoof. “I do think you will find it quite charming.”
“I know I will.” Fleur sighed happily. It had only been a few minutes, but not a single paparazzi was to be seen. It was almost too good to be true.
“As per your request I have booked you the finest room that Ponyville’s hotel has to offer.” Rarity explained and cast an inquisitive look behind Fleur. “Where is your luggage?”
“I don’t have any.” Fleur explained. “I didn’t think that I would need any dresses.”
“And you won’t.” Rarity’s eyes lit up. “I’ll take care of everything, don’t you worry.”
Rarity led the way into town pointing out a few buildings and shops here and there. They quickened their pace as they passed a bakery called Sugar Cube Corner, but Rarity wouldn’t say why they did so.
All in all Fleur liked what she saw. There was a sense of serenity to be found here that was painfully missing from other towns she had visited. Then again all places she had been to previously had only been large cities. Perhaps the calm tranquility was the norm for little villages and towns. Fleur decided she would have to test her theory at some point in the future.
Their tour briefly took them past Carousel Boutique. Rarity explained they would return here later. The twinkle in the fashionista’s eyes went unnoticed by Fleur who watched a pegasus mailmare delivering the mail. The mailmare turned and saw Fleur watching her. Then the grey mare waved happily and flew off to drop off the next bit of mail. Fleur returned the wave enjoying the fact that she was treated thus far like any other pony would.
The two mares turned into Ponyville’s market in town square. Fleur held her breath at the sight of so many ponies. There was no doubt in her mind that there would be at least one pony there that would recognize her. Her face was plastered on a lot of products being sold all over Equestria after all.
As they passed a stall where cherries were for sale, Fleur could see the pony behind the counter watch and indeed recognize her. Apart from giving her a big smile nothing else happened. No sudden request for taking a picture or getting something signed. It was a huge relief to Fleur as the same scenario repeated itself a few more times with some other ponies. What she didn’t know was that the citizens of Ponyville had experienced a lot more noteworthy things in the past and the appearance of a top model was something almost normal to them. Parasprites, rampaging Ursa Minors and chaotic deities had left an impression on the town's inhabitants.
Fleur decided to test the citizens a bit more and removed her disguise. Apart from a few more ponies noticing her nothing happened. She could have jumped out of joy, but did not do so in case that might stir up some commotion.
Finally the tour ended with them turning towards a large building near the center of town.
“I took the liberty to make some reservations for us.” Rarity beamed her smile as they trotted towards Ponyville’s spa. “After that long train ride I am sure you could do with something to relax you.”
“Sounds good to me.” Fleur didn’t mention that the train ride was not the thing she needed relaxation from. The prospect of a nice spa treatment washed away the last bit of tension left in her body. No doubt she would be nothing more than a pony-shaped blob of jelly once they left the spa. And that was something that Fleur could be very content with.
About three hours later a train pulled into Ponyville’s station.
As the doors slid open the cramped occupants virtually exploded onto the platform. Each one of them immediately on the lookout for Fleur De Lis. Unsure of where to go first the reporters began checking and readying their equipment.
Scoop snorted with disdain at her competition. While a lot of them had been fooled by Fleur and had followed her double to Las Pegasus, a good two dozen or more had not been fooled and had followed Scoop to Ponyville.
She had hoped it would be a nice relaxed affair here in this tiny little town. Take a few compromising pictures of Fleur doing something, anything, and then spin some juicy tale about it. Now she would have to work fast and try to get the good stuff before any of the others.
Her mood soured further when she spotted two figures exiting the very last compartment of the train.
“Oh, buck me.” Scoop hissed and stomped a hoof on the floor.
“Here? In front of all the others?” Quick Shot gave Scoop what he thought was a charming grin. It just seemed slimy to her.
“Look over there.” Scoop nodded towards the two stallions standing a good deal away from the other reporters. “It’s Slandermane and his little freak Spooky Noodles.”
“Guess you were right about your hunch then.” Quick Shot observed the odd stallions for a moment.
Slandermane had earned his name as a joke. His absence of a mane and the fact that no other pony had excelled in the field of slandering other ponies was combined and Slandermane was born. His real name was a bit of a mystery and long forgotten as he had adopted the joke name and turned it into his signature.
Nopony dared to call him by that name face to face. Too great was their fear of him retaliating with a slanderous article that could forever shame and humiliate the pony it was written about. Of course all of it was utter nonsense and outright lies, but his talent at spinning the tale was incredibly believable. So much so that some of the rumors he had spread were still widely believed by some of Equestria’s citizens. The most notorious of them being the one about Princess Celestia’s obsession with bananas even though the fruit ranked very low on her personal scale of deliciousness. That was another thing Slandermane was infamous for. Where other tabloid reporters had at least a very sketchy sense of boundaries and very few lines they would not cross, Slandermane knew no such borders and mercilessly pursued his pony of interest until a juicy story was found and modified to his tastes.
His strange companion was equally infamous amongst ponies. Spooky Noodles had, despite his rather silly name, caused many ponies to only whisper his name in conversation. He had an uncanny talent to turn up in the most unexpected locations and scared ponies by jumping up and scaring them. The fact that he seemed to enjoy ponies curled up on the floor out of terror further alienated him from regular society.
Despite or maybe because of their oddball personalities the articles they wrote had a very large amount of readers. Them being here in Ponyville solidified Scoop’s suspicion that something noteworthy was brewing in this tiny town and she was determined to be the first to get that story.
“Come on.” Scoop whispered to her photographer and briskly began trotting away from the station.
Of course the other reporters caught wind of it immediately and followed them. Slandermane and his compatriot watched the mass of reporters leave. Very slowly Slandermane followed them at his own pace with Spooky Noodles chuckling madly in anticipation.
“It is simply the most exquisite shade of ocean blue you have ever seen.” Rarity let out a little giggle.
Fleur did not share the emotion and rather rolled her eyes. As Rarity was already wrapped in seaweed with an eye-mask covering her eyes and currently was in the process of having a mud bath she did not see Fleur’s gesture.
Fleur knew that Rarity meant well. She had not written that she wanted to avoid anything related to fashion. So naturally the fashionista had assumed that Fleur would of course just love to try a few of her designs and help her with her new line. The prospect of having to spend the next few days modeling dresses made her wince silently.
As one of the spa ponies approached her to start applying the seaweed she politely held out a hoof to stop them. The spa itself had been a very pleasant and surprising event. To find a spa with that much care and expertise in a village roughly in nowhere was unexpected. It was slightly marred by Rarity’s continuous expressions about fashion related things. Fleur excused herself and said she needed to use the bathroom.
Instead of going in the direction she was told Fleur only felt the need to get outside and take a breath of fresh air. It was in her own interest to tell Rarity that she had no intentions of trying on dozens or hundreds of dresses. It was supposed to be her vacation and she was sure Rarity would understand. She would promise the fashionista to make up for it some other time, but for now she just wanted some time void of any stress.
That particular bubble burst almost instantly as she exited the spa.
“There she is!”
Fleur froze for a moment thinking her mind was playing tricks on her. Very slowly she turned her head towards the direction of the sound. She let out a strangled yelp as she saw the large bunch of reporters scrambling over each other to get to Fleur first. The very same bunch she had thought she had lost in Canterlot. Obviously her plan had not worked, but there wasn’t any time to think about what had gone wrong. All that mattered now was to get away from them.
Fleur ran as fast as she could away from the droves of reporters now struggling to keep up with her.
Her way of staying in shape was to jog and do various other cardiovascular activities. Combined with the longer stride she had thanks to her long legs, she managed to gain a lot of distance from her pursuers very fast.
That however was only a small consolation. While she could outrun them that still left her running around aimlessly through a town she hardly knew. Going back to the hotel was out of the question as they would most likely be staying there as well. The spa was not safe anymore either and she had no way of getting on the next train without having to wait for a few hours until one arrived.
As Fleur sprinted along she caught glimpse of a shop sign out of the corner of her eye.
Bon Bon’s Sweets.
Fleur saw her chance to get some help and skidded around the corner on course to her friends shop. She hoped that it was even open at this time and felt a small bit of relief as she saw a pony leave the shop with a bag of sweets in his hoof.
He had to jump aside as Fleur barged past him and almost jumped through the door into the shop. A very surprised Bon Bon just stared at her for a moment.
“Fleur!” Bon Bon’s facial expression shifted from surprised to happy instantly. “I thought we would only meet up later this evening.”
“Help me!” Fleur was in front of Bon Bon in only three long steps and grabbed the sweetmaker by the shoulders.
“Uh…what’s going on?” Bon Bon went back at being surprised and just a tad confused.
“The press!” Fleur’s head whipped around to stare at the front door in panic. For the moment her pursuers could not be seen. “They found me. I can’t take it anymore Bon Bon! Please, you have to help me. Hide me! Please, please, please….”
Fleur was now on her knees which brought her to eye-level with the beige earthpony. She was begging and clinging on to her friend for dear life now. Any sort of self control that she was known for had effectively been washed away. It only showed how stressed out she actually was and Bon Bon picked up on it immediately.
“Upstairs!” Bon Bon nodded to a set of stairs behind the counter. “Lyra is there. She can help you. I’ll keep them occupied here. Go!”
Bon Bon untangled herself from Fleur’s grip and shoved her towards the stairs. Without another word Fleur bolted upstairs only narrowly avoiding being seen by the first few reporters that had seen her enter the shop. As Fleur opened the door at the top of the stairs as quietly as possible she was greeted with a sight she would not so soon forget.
It was their living room and the first object in her view was a large navy blue couch facing away from the door. The couch itself was nothing unusual, the mare lying on the backrest however was.
Lyra stretched slowly while she was lying on her back on top of the backrest. She had her eyes closed and a smile plastered on her face. Fleur was speechless for a brief moment at the outfit Lyra currently was wearing. A tiny lacy black saddle was visible on her back despite her lying on it at the moment. Long black socks and what seemed to be a black and white collar, similar to the one worn by maids, finished off the rather risqué appearance of the unicorn.
“Took you long enough.” Lyra’s smile grew a bit wider as she licked her lips and whispered the next sentence in a very seductive tone of voice. “I’ve been waiting.”
Fleur momentarily stunned just politely coughed once into her hoof. Lyra instantly opened her eyes and looked at the origin of the unknown cough. Her eyes went wide as she saw Fleur and then lost her balance. Thankfully she fell on the couch and not the hard floor.
Lyra’s head popped up a moment later and she rubbed her eyes to make sure she wasn’t seeing things.
“Fleur?” Lyra blinked a few more times. “What are you doing here?”
“I need you to...” Fleur said and rushed up to the couch.
“Whoa!” Lyra held out a hoof to stop Fleur from possibly jumping over the backrest. “Listen, I know I am irresistible, but I am a one mare pony.”
“What?” Fleur just stared blankly at the unicorn.
“I belong to Bon Bon and nothing you say can change that.” Lyra crossed her forelegs and turned her head away from the model.
“No, no.” Fleur finally caught on what Lyra was implying. “Bon Bon sent me up here.”
“She did?” Lyra turned back to face Fleur with a raised eyebrow. “Hm….that’s unexpected. But it still is best for us to wait for her. I don’t like to start anything without her. Would you like some socks?”
“No, you don’t understand.” Fleur didn’t have time to go into a lot of detail. “The paparazzi from Canterlot has followed me here! Bon Bon said you would help me and hide me.”
Lyra scrunched up her face at the mention of the tabloid reporters. She had experienced their so called reporting first hoof when she had parted ways with the Royal Canterlot Orchestra a few years ago. As Lyra had little intentions of maintaining a good public appearance she had not played along. The first hoof contact with one of the reporters had indeed been with her hoof and had led to a court order against the lyrist. Lyra had been fine with it and it had given her the freedom she had wanted in the end.
“Ok, then.” Lyra snapped back into reality and tried thinking of a way to deal with the new situation. And judging by the sounds of a beginning argument from downstairs it would have to be dealt with quickly. “Just forget everything I had said earlier.”
Fleur nodded once and also felt it was best to forget that little misunderstanding.
“I know!” Lyra said after a moment of thought. “Vinyl and Octavia! They live just across the street. We can hide there for the moment and plan ahead.”
“How do we get there?” Fleur looked back at the door she had come through expecting it to fly open and the room filling up with reporters any minute.
“We jump.” Lyra trotted over to a window and opened it.
“From the first floor?” Fleur was not too happy at the possibility looming in her immediate future of being cornered by reporters while nursing a sprained or broken hoof.
“There’s a large bush just below. It will break our fall.” Lyra stuck her head out the window to check if anypony was visible on the street below. “Ok, the coast is clear. Follow me!”
Without waiting for an answer Lyra jumped out of the window. Fleur not having any other options only hesitated for a second or two before jumping after the mint green mare. True to her word Lyra had been correct about the bush breaking their fall. It would no doubt have left Fleur’s mane in disarray but that was the last thing on her mind at the moment.
The two mares hunkered down inside the bush and waited for any kind of reaction on the street. It seemed as if nopony had seen or heard their escape and Lyra bravely stuck her head out of the bush to get a better look.
“Excellent!” Lyra grinned as she pulled her head back inside. “We are in the clear.”
“Now what?” Fleur didn’t dare move.
“Now we casually walk across the street and go into Vinyl’s place. The door is unlocked so that won’t be a problem.” Lyra explained and pointed in the direction in which their target was.
“Casually walk across?” Fleur turned to look at Lyra.
“If we run we might attract attention. Best to keep it as inconspicuous as possible.” Lyra said and stood up.
“Inconspicuous? In that?” Fleur gave Lyra a questioning look.
“Huh?” It then dawned on Lyra that she was still wearing the outfit meant for some private time together with Bon Bon. “Oh, ponyfeathers!”
“Just take it off and leave it here.” Fleur’s suggestion was met with vigorous shaking of Lyra’s head.
“Do you know how much this thing cost? No way am I leaving it lying in some bush.” Lyra briefly scanned the area once more. “Change of plans. We’ll make a mad dash towards their home.”
“Ok.” Fleur coiled her legs underneath her body ready to spring into action.
“One, two, three, GO!” Lyra jumped from the bush with Fleur only a millisecond behind her.
They only had to cross the street, but those few meters seemed awfully long as the two mares raced as fast as possible towards the front door of Vinyl and Octavia’s home. Only half a meter away Lyra readied a spell to open the door.
“Perhaps I’ll go for a shower in a minute.” Vinyl informed Octavia and took a sip of tea.
The DJ and the cellist were enjoying a nice cup of tea with a few biscuits. Thus far the day had been relaxed and they would meet up later with Bon Bon and Lyra to go for dinner with Fleur who was supposed to visit.
“I had a bath earlier.” Octavia informed her marefriend and also took a sip of tea.
“So that’s where all the hot water went.” Vinyl joked.
The front door opened and along with it Octavia’s eyes widened. Vinyl had her back turned towards the front door, but judging by Octavia’s reaction whatever had opened it was not an everyday sight. That was even more evident when Octavia sprayed out the sip of tea in her mouth all of Vinyl.
“I guess I really will be needing that shower now.” Vinyl replied dryly. Octavia did not reply and just stared slack-jawed towards the front door. A drop of tea dropped from her bottom lip on to the table.
Vinyl turned around slowly to face what had burst into their home, it might have been a burglar or some otherworldly demonic being. The sight in front of her was possibly even stranger.
Fleur stood on her hindlegs with her back pressed up against the now closed front door. Beside her Lyra peeked out of one of the small windows to the side of the door. The outfit Lyra was wearing made Vinyl blush a tiny bit.
“Is it my birthday?” Vinyl asked after a few moments of silence.
The answer to Vinyl’s question came in form of a very precisely thrown biscuit.
The DJ turned towards Octavia who gave her a look one could only describe as frosty.
“I was joking.” Vinyl replied dryly.
“What’s going on?” Octavia turned her attention towards the new arrivals while wiping the last remnants of the tea away from her lips with a napkin.
“We’re hiding.” Lyra informed and cast a last glance out the window. “Seems like nopony saw us.”
“Hiding from whom?” Vinyl shook her head at Lyra’s outfit only briefly wondering if Octavia might be willing to put something like that on. She would have to carefully ask that question at a later time.
“Don’t tell me it’s Bon Bon.” Octavia’s own gears in her head had been turning at an alarming speed and had come up with a not so nice speculation.
“Bon Bon actually sent Fleur to me.” Lyra informed the pair and began taking off the first sock.
“Is it your birthday?” Vinyl received another biscuit to the head for that quip, which she ignored and kept watching the striptease going on in her own home.
“I’m hiding from the paparazzi.” Fleur replied and only hesitantly left her position from behind the door.
Octavia and Vinyl’s ears flattened at the same time at that piece of information. They had been relatively lucky in the past and had only briefly brushed with the tabloids. Octavia’s rather sudden and public coming out had caused a bit of a stir for a couple of weeks. It had died down rather quickly as it became apparent that neither Vinyl or Octavia had any intentions of becoming widely known celebrities. As such there wasn’t much demand to know their every step and things had normalized for them rather quickly.
“Where are they?” Vinyl asked the pair beside the front door.
“Still in Bon Bon’s shop I hope.” Lyra removed the last piece of clothing and carefully bunched it up to a ball which then was put on the couch in the living room. “She’ll hold them off for a while. Figured that we would hide out here until they leave.”
“I hate to throw a wrench into your idea, but I doubt they will just leave.” Octavia looked from one pony to another.
“If we hide Fleur they might give up.” Lyra shrugged.
“They never give up.” Fleur lamented and felt the stress returning tenfold. Somehow she never could catch a break.
“They’ll start looking for her.” Vinyl began after a moment of thought. “They aren’t stupid and you can bet they will start looking around the places where her friends live.” Vinyl waved her hoof around to encompass their home.
“You are right.” Fleur was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. “I’m so sorry I dragged you all into this.”
“It’s ok.” Octavia stood up from her chair and trotted over to the distraught mare to give her a comforting hug. “We are glad to help you out.”
“Ok, so she can’t stay here either.” Lyra tapped her forehead to start up the thinking process. “Where else could we hide her?”
“What about the Princess Castle?” Vinyl suggested and cleaned up the tea and pieces of biscuit stuck to her face with a few napkins.
“Canterlot is a bit too far away.” Lyra dismissed the idea with the wave of her hoof.
“I meant Twilight.”
“Oh….yeah. I forgot about her.”
“Do you think she would take me in?” Fleur had only very briefly met Twilight Sparkle and that had been before her ascension.
“Of course she will.” Lyra nodded once. “She is the Princess of Friendship after all.”
“So….how do we get Fleur there?” Octavia highlighted the next problem on their list.
“We make a run for it?” Vinyl suggestion was met with the shaking of three heads.
“We are too close to them right now.” Lyra nodded back towards Bon Bon’s shop. “We would have to go across the street and they might see us.”
“How about a disguise?” Octavia’s idea was met with the nodding of three heads.
“Do you have anything that will fit her?” Lyra was right that the tall thin model was out of Octavia and Vinyl’s sizes. If need be they could just cover her up in some sheets and try to pass her off as a ghost.
“Heh…I have something that might fit.” Vinyl gave her friends a crooked smile and left the room to go into the basement.
Moments later Vinyl returned with a large box in her magical grasp. Raised eyebrows greeted her as she turned to the waiting ponies.
“What? It’s the box I use to transport my deck. It’s clean and sturdy enough for Fleur.” Vinyl tapped the box with a hoof.
“You want to stuff me into a box and then…?” Fleur eyed her new possible mode of being incognito wearily.
“Then we carry you over to Twilight’s place. Easy.”
“There has to be a better way.” Octavia tried to think of something better, but came up blank for the moment.
“No….this might work.” Fleur stepped up to the box to inspect it a bit closer. If she got down on her rump she would fit easily inside.
“Then we have a plan.” Vinyl beamed at a still skeptical looking Octavia.
“If Fleur is ok with it….” The cellist finally agreed and shrugged.
“Let get going then.” Lyra nudged Fleur to get into the box with a hoof. “Time is wasting and we don’t want to be caught in the open. Bon Bon can only hold them off for so long until they start looking elsewhere.”
Without another word the equestrian supermodel got into the box. Vinyl closed it up and used a bit of string to keep it shut, then she turned to Lyra.
“You open the door and help me levitate it on Octavia.” Vinyl instructed and readied her own levitation spell.
“On to me?” Octavia eyed the box once more. There wasn’t really any doubt that Octavia was the strongest of the currently present mares. Earthpony genes and years of lugging heavy musical equipment around made her the logical choice. “Oh well.” Ocatvia shrugged. “Pass me a blanket, please.”
“Here.” Vinyl passed her the required item that in foresight had already brought along. “You’ll only have to carry half the box. I’ll take the other half.” There was no way Vinyl would let her beloved carry the entire weight as little as there was considering Fleur’s thin figure.
Luck was on their side as they levitated the box containing a supermodel on to the two mare’s backs as the street outside was momentarily deserted. The ride wouldn’t be comfy, but it gave her a sliver of a chance to escape the reporters unnoticed. Slowly the transport got moving, Lyra darting ahead and running up to her house.
With her outfit from earlier bunched up to a ball in her magical grasp she measured the distance to the window that they had jumped from. She had hastily written a note and stuffed it between the socks letting Bon Bon know where they were going. Lyra couldn’t resist hoof-pumping as she managed to throw her garments through the open window on her first try. Then she hurried to catch up to the unorthodox transportation mode for a model.
The mare inside was stubborn as a mule and refused even knowing Fleur De Lis. Scoop knew she was lying, but couldn’t prove it right now. Seeing that there wasn’t any point in trying to persuade the shop owner from letting them have a bit of a snoop around upstairs she decided to get a breath of fresh air and see if something noteworthy was to be seen from outside.
The first thing she noted was Slandermane standing at the end of the street watching the commotion in the sweet shop from afar. It puzzled her at first that he was standing so far away and not here with the rest of them. Then it dawned on her that maybe Fleur wasn’t even in the shop after all and that he knew something she didn’t.
Slandermane watched the others reporters trying to force their way into the little sweet shop. Perhaps it was instinct that he thought there would not be any interesting story to be found there. That or a possible dislike of sweets that kept him far away from the shop.
“Want me to scare them?” Spooky Noodles grinned evilly. “Or do you want me to take some pictures?”
Slandermane’s assistant held up his grubby little camera. It may have possibly seen some better days long ago, but at the moment it was a wonder it actually was still functional. The term functional was something up for debate as any pictures the camera took were nothing but a blurry mess most of the time. Only with a lot of imagination could one identify what was supposed to be shown.
And that was its greatest feature and a very powerful tool for Slandermane. Ponies had very active imaginations and would see the strangest things in blurry photographs. All he had to do was give them a little push into the direction he wished. In combination with one of his articles blurry splotches turned into ponies engaged in frivolous behavior with whipped cream, two badgers and an umbrella. Readers would swear that is what they saw there when in reality it had been merely a shot of rocks piled up on the beach.
There was immense power there and it was his alone to wield. For a brief moment it seemed as if Slandermane would set his little minion loose to take pictures. Then something caught the corner of his eye. Three mares walking at a brisk pace a street away. Two of them carrying a large box on their backs, while the third kept glancing about nervously.
Without saying a word he slowly turned into the direction they were heading and saw that they seemingly were going to the castle. Spooky Noodles seemed slightly crestfallen that he would not have the opportunity just yet to scare somepony and followed Slandermane as he slowly moved towards the castle.
“Quick Shot!” Scoop turned her head towards the shop but kept her eyes glued on the retreating figures of Slandermane and his assistant. “Get your flank OUT HERE!”
A loud crash was heard from inside the shop and the commotion from inside died down instantly. Then the front door nearly was torn from its hinges as the entire bunch of reporters was shoved outside by the now rather furious shop owner.
“You can’t treat the press this way!” A stallion cried out as he hit the dirt.
“YOU!” The shop owner thrust a hoof towards the reporters now sprawled over the ground in front of her shop. “You have no right to complain! You just broke part of my shop and no doubt ate some of my merchandise while I wasn’t looking! I have the right mind to call the guards and file a complaint for vandalism and theft!”
Wisely the reporters kept quiet and just watched as the mare slammed the door shut and locked it up with more than one lock judging by the sound. Scoop found her partner lying in the dirt and shamelessly staring at the mare lying on her back and facing away from him with her legs sprawled out to her sides. Out of reflex he took a picture and only barely managed to avoid the resulting kick to his face.
“What the hay do you think you are doing?!” Rapid Flash quickly got to her hooves and was ready to aim her next kick more thoroughly.
“Sorry.” Quick Shot moved behind Scoop to avoid any potentially painful attacks. “That was just a case of premature photographication.”
He paid no attention to the torrent of rather colorful insults hurled at him by the other photographer and let himself get dragged to the side by Scoop.
“Heh….that’ll get me a few bits if I pass it on to my cousin Money.” Quick Shot grinned at the possibility of making some bits on the side.
“Concentrate on the task at hoof!” Scoop lightly jabbed her hoof in his side. “Something is going on over there.”
Quick Shot looked in the direction she was pointing and saw Slandermane and his cohort slowly walk away. “You think they know something we don’t?”
“I bet they do. Come on.” Scoop trotted after the pair with her partner in tow.
Back in front of the shop all reporters gradually got up from the ground and dusted themselves off. Of course they noticed Scoop and Quick Shot trotting away. Not letting a potential chance for a good story pass by they followed them, sensing that any potential gossip was not to be found at this sweet shop.
“Can you manage?” Octavia gave Vinyl a sideways glance.
“Yeah, no problem.” Vinyl spoke with a grunt punctuating her sentence. Heavy lugging was not her area of expertise and she was happy that they had arrived at the castle. “Just get the door open please.”
Lyra did as instructed and opened the large doors leading in to the castle of Ponyville’s own princess. The immediate hallway behind the doors was empty. A small sign informed any guests that the library was straight ahead. Once the doors had been closed by Lyra behind them Vinyl let out a sigh of relief and readied her magic. Together with the mint green unicorn they lift the box off their backs and set it carefully on the ground.
Fleur carefully peeked out of the box and when she saw that the coast was clear she left the confines of her mode of transportation.
“I can’t thank you enough.” Fleur stretched to relieve some tension in her long limbs from being folded up under her.
“Glad we could help.” Octavia was entirely unfazed from lugging Fleur halfway across Ponyville, unlike her marefriend who took the moment to rub her aching back.
“Let’s find out where Twilight is and ask her for help.” Lyra led the way deeper into the castle. Vinyl frowned at the now empty box and decided to take it along and not just leave it there. This time she used her magic and found it much more comfortable.
The castle seemed empty. Not a sound could be heard, which made sense as it also functioned as Ponyville’s library after the original one had been blasted into oblivion. Twilight would no doubt be reading something herself or doing princess-y things that didn’t make much sound.
A light could be seen at the end of the hallway and with no other ideas the quartet moved towards it. As they entered the room with the light on they were more than just surprised at the decorations everywhere.
Streamers, balloons, a buffet table full of snacks from Sugar Cube Corner and an assortment of various party games could only mean one thing. With nothing more than a whisper did three mares utter one name in unison.
“Pinkie Pie.”
Fleur just looked from one mare to the next unsure of what was going on. Her confusion deepened as she found herself suddenly looking at a very pink pony with a very wide smile. How she had appeared in the otherwise deserted room was a mystery. The encounter took a very hoofs-on approach as Fleur suddenly found herself in the grasp of a very powerful hug.
“Surprise!” Pinkie Pie cheered and hopped once using her hind legs and taking Fleur along for the ride.
“Pinkie!” A new voice came from the adjoining room they were in. “Put her down!”
Fleur was released instantly at the command by Rarity and took a moment to take a step away from the exuberant pink pony. “What is going on?”
“Fleur!” Rarity came trotting further into the room towards the model. The rest of her close circle of friends also came into the room, but stayed near the door. “Why did you leave so suddenly? I was beginning to worry after I couldn’t find you in the spa.”
“I had to leave.” Fleur answered, but did not want to explain in greater detail while others were present.
“I was talking to Twilight if she could maybe help me find you, but then Pinkie Pie said you would come here.” Rarity looked over to the still bouncing partypony.
“She did?” Fleur eyed the mentioned pony with curiosity. “But how could she know?”
“My Pinkie-Sense of course!” Pinkie explained. Rarity and her friends seemed to accept that answer, but it only raised more for Fleur.
“Pinkie-Sense?” Fleur took another step away from the strange pony.
“It’s a shame you arrived in the box.” Pinkie stopped her bouncing for a moment. “I have spent a lot of time setting up my newest nifty little gadget.”
From seemingly nowhere Pinkie Pie pulled a little box in front of her. A large red button was the only thing noteworthy about the otherwise black box.
Without explaining what it was for Pinkie pressed it.
Dirt Sheet along with the rest of the reporters had followed Slandermane moving slowly towards the castle. It seemed as if something was or would be going on there that had drawn his attention. As they had lost Fleur De Lis for the time being any other juicy story was good enough to satisfy their appetites until the model turned back up. Dirt Sheet looked into the direction his photographer was indicating.
“It’s her.” Dirt Sheet recognized the shopkeeper from before. How she had managed to get ahead of them wasn’t a big mystery. Slandermane moved very slowly and the brisk trot with which she was moving had been enough to overtake them. “She’s also going to the castle. I wonder why?”
Dirt Sheet grinned his most slimy grin. Perhaps Fleur had eluded them before, but her trusted friend might just lead them right back to her. Now there were two possibilities presented to him. Either follow the snail-paced Slandermane for a good story or follow the sweetmaker in hopes of finding a better story a bit faster.
“Come on.” Dirt Sheet decided it was worth investigating where that mare was heading. They could easily catch back up to the slightly freakish reporter any time later.
Rapid Flash joined her partner and trotted past the leading pair. Just as they were about to pass the odd pair, Spooky Noodles jumped to the side and let out a half-growl half-shriek. Rapid Flash let out a yelp in surprise and jumped into the air. It took her a good few minutes to calm back down. The fact that Spooky Noodles kept laughing at her reaction didn’t help much.
The little incident caused the other reporters to take note and they also decided to abandon their tailing of Slandermane and rather investigate the sweetmakers next move.
Bon Bon was aware of the reporters now beginning to follow her.
She had managed to get ahead of them by using a few narrow alleyways and a steady brisk trot. Luckily they had not been moving very fast. Unluckily they were heading in the same direction she was.
Bon Bon had found Lyra’s note once she went upstairs to check on Fleur. Without wasting a second she had left the building through the backdoor in her kitchen and had set course for the castle.
The fact that the reporters had seen her didn’t bother her one bit. For all they knew she might be on her way to the castle to file a complaint about them to the Princess. They couldn’t possibly know that Fleur had been brought there by her friends.
“What does that button do?” Rainbow Dash asked after nothing seemed to happen.
“Well you would have to be outside to really see it.” Pinkie grinned her trademark grin.
“Outside?” Fleur asked with worry in her voice. A sinking feeling set in with some of the assembled mares. “What do you mean?”
“Well I thought I would throw you my welcome to Ponyville party.” Pinkie bounced once more. “But of course I would have to make sure that you would find the place where we would be having it, so I took a few precautions so that you would definitely find it.”
“Oh oh.” Vinyl had a bad feeling where this entire thing was heading. Octavia shared her thoughts and turned around in a flash and ran as fast as she could towards the front door at the end of the hallway.
Bon Bon stopped dead in her tracks as a blinding light erupted from the front of the castle.
It took a moment for her eyes to adjust and when she could see clearly again she wished she couldn’t. Above the front door and across the entire front of the castle somepony had taken the time to place now brightly glowing neon letters all over to spell out a message.
Fleur De Lis
Please
Come Here!
An arrow pointed towards the front door. Each of the letters was at least two ponies high and could no doubt be seen from every last corner of Ponyville.
Bon Bon turned her head back to check on the reporters. As to be expected they too had frozen in place for the moment. She could see it on their faces that they only now registered what the message meant.
Instantly they started a frenzied dash towards the castle. Bon Bon had no other choice and also sped madly towards the doors. She had a bit of a lead on them and was nearly as fast as them. It would be close, but she could manage if she put her mind into it.
It was a stroke of luck that somepony was just opening the door from inside.
Octavia opened the door to see what Pinkie Pie had done.
She never got the chance to see what had been done as Bon Bon barreled into her and knocking her a good distance away. Groggily she watched as Bon Bon closed the door back up and locking it up. Almost ten seconds later somepony started banging on it from outside. By the sound it was more than just one pony Octavia corrected her assessment.
Bon Bon hurried over to the prone cellist and helped her back on her hooves with an apology. Without saying anything more Bon Bon ran towards the room where other ponies had watched the little scuffle from the doorway. Octavia followed her while still being dizzy from her impromptu flying lesson.
“Close the windows and draw the curtains!” Bon Bon yelled at them. “Quick! Before they get any strange ideas!”
“What’s going on?” Twilight obeyed the command from Bon Bon by using her magic to close all windows simultaneously including drawing the curtains.
“They’re here!” Bon Bon finally came to a stop and took a moment to catch her breath.
“They?” Twilight was just as confused as the rest of her friends.
“Oh no….” Fleur shrunk back. She knew what the sweet maker meant.
“But how did they find us?” Vinyl had also understood what was happening. “Our disguise was perfect!”
“What did you do?” Lyra pieced some of the puzzle together and got right in Pinkie Pie’s face.
“I just set up a nice little sign for Fleur to know where we are.” Pinkie answered slightly confused.
“A sign in two-pony high bright neon letters.” Bon Bon added between heavy breaths. “All of Ponyville knows where Fleur is right now.”
“You moron!” Lyra pushed the pink pony with a hoof.
“Hey!” Rainbow Dash swooped between Lyra and a still confused Pinkie Pie. As far as she was concerned Pinkie had done nothing wrong and was now being attacked by the lyrist. Rainbow would not let that happen. “You don’t push Pinkie around!”
“We would have gotten away with it if it hadn’t been sabotaged by that pink menace!” Lyra was getting riled up and she most certainly would not back down from anypony. Rainbow Dash flared her wings open in response and was about to defend her friend if necessary.
“Ok, ok. Calm down you two.” Vinyl wedged herself between the agitated ponies. The last thing she wanted was for a fight to break out and tried to defuse the situation. “Pinkie doesn’t know what we had been trying to do. You can’t blame her for just wanting to do something nice.”
“What exactly was it you were trying to do?” Twilight looked from one to the other hoping to receive some answer.
Bon Bon was still trying to catch her breath. Octavia kept shaking her head to clear away the last bit of dizziness. Lyra backed away from Rainbow Dash albeit only after Vinyl started pushing her away. The pegasus kept glaring daggers at the mint green unicorn, but remained silent.
The possibility of some kind of physical confrontation had led to Fluttershy hiding behind Applejack as a precautionary measure. The farmpony kept a very watchful eye on Lyra and Rainbow Dash. In case those two might clash she wouldn’t hesitate to separate them.
Rarity meanwhile stood beside a very silent and rigid Fleur. The model seemed to have frozen in place and just stared blankly ahead.
“We are trying to hide Fleur from the press.” Vinyl informed Twilight and nodded once towards the model.
“Press?” Rarity cocked an eyebrow. “What kind of press?”
“The bad kind.” Lyra replied and kept giving Pinkie Pie an angry look. “The kind that never seems to quit until they get their story.”
“What’s the big deal?” Rainbow Dash asked and finally looked away from Lyra. “Having some attention from the press is awesome.”
“Not this kind.” Lyra snorted and also gave up her aggressive stance.
“What are you talking about?” Twilight had very little contact with Equestria’s press. Sure, there had been a few interviews she had given on occasion, immediately after her coronation for example, but apart from that they had left her alone.
“It’s the paparazzi…..” Fleur finally spoke up. Her voice just as tense as the rest of her body. “They follow me…constantly.”
“Sounds kinda cool.” Rainbow Dash shrugged. “You get to show them your stuff and get your own articles in the papers.”
“Yes….my stuff…they…really want to take pictures of my…stuff…” Fleur’s expression remained void of any emotion, but her voice quavered as she spoke.
“Why don’t we invite them too?” Pinkie suggested. For her the more ponies present at her party meant just more fun to be had. “I made plenty of punch.”
“That wouldn’t be a good idea.” Octavia shook her head and moved beside Fleur, worried that the model had somehow broken.
“Yeah, they are like vultures.” Lyra added and cast her look towards the still closed front door. “Picking away until nothing is left.”
“But it’s just the press….I mean how bad could it be?” Rainbow Dash still was puzzled what was so bad about having their attention.
“Speed-demon or super softy.” Lyra quoted an article written some time ago and published in the Foal Free Press and took slight pleasure in seeing the pegasus cringe.
“Oh….it’s those kind of articles?” Rainbow Dash remembered that particular article very well. She had been even more reluctant to go to Cloudsdale after it had been published.
“Well….the crusaders learned their lesson.” Applejack spoke up for the first time that evening. “Don’t ya’ll think them reporter folk might learn their lesson too if we spoke to ‘em?”
“That’s how they earn their living.” Lyra briefly toyed with the idea of grabbing some kind of weapon and simply beat them away. A few more court orders was something she was willing to live with if it meant that they would leave her friend alone for a while. “It’s their job to make other ponies as uncomfortable as possible with their gossip.”
“How about we just talk to them and tell them to go away?” Fluttershy added quietly. Despite having achieved some fame as a model herself a while ago she had not been targeted by the tabloids. Mainly due to Photo Finish keeping a very close eye on her and shooing away any potential nosy reporters. Luckily Fluttershy’s moment of fame did not last long enough for the reporters to keep trying to pry into her private life.
“They won’t go away…” Fleur’s eye twitched. “They never go away…”
The assembled ponies looked at the model with worry when she suddenly started laughing.
“Uh…you ok?” Octavia hesitantly laid a hoof on the model’s shoulder.
“I’m fine! Just peachy!” Fleur kept laughing hysterically. “Why shouldn’t I be? Having every move written about, every little insignificant gesture blown out of proportion, every word I say checked for hidden meanings about my preferences about everything….why would I not be ok?”
“See?” Pinkie pointed a hoof happily at the model. “She is having fun so let’s get this party started!”
“Hold on, dear.” Rarity pulled away Pinkie’s patented party cannon with her magic. “I don’t think the time is right for that right now.”
“Why not?” Pinkie looked at her friend confused. “No fun if she is the only one laughing.”
“I don’t think she is laughing because of having so much fun.” Vinyl murmured.
As if on cue Fleur’s hysterical laughter broke into loud sobs. There was no escape for her and being here in Ponyville had been the last straw needed to break the manticore’s back. The walls she kept up constantly crumbled away into dust and left a nervous wreck to be seen for all.
“I can’t take it anymore!” Fleur let her head hang low. Her entire body sagged along as any energy left in her evaporated like a drop of water on a hot stove. “They just keep coming and coming. I thought I could get away from them here. Have a small moment of peace and clear my head by doing just normal everyday things. But now…they’re here.”
The ponies watched at Fleur lurched back towards the box they had transported her in. Without another word she slid back inside the box and laid herself down. Stunned the rest of them just watched in silence.
“Why didn’t you say anything?” Rarity asked after a moment.
“I didn’t want to make a lot of fuss….” Fleur answered from within the box.
“Why are you back in the box?” Lyra asked while she trotted closer.
“I had a moment of peace in here.” Fleur answered promptly. “I’ll just stay here until I have to go back.”
“You can’t stay in there!” Rarity held a hoof to her chest at the prospect of leaving her esteemed guest hiding away in a box for an entire week.
“Rarity’s right!” Pinkie stuck her head into the box. “You can’t have a party inside a box!”
“Will you give it a rest with your parties!” Lyra snapped at the pink pony and shoved her away from the box. “Don’t you see what you already did with your little welcome sign?”
“What I did?” Pinkie looked in confusion at the lyrist.
“Yeah! You led them right here and all our efforts to get her some kind of refuge have been for nothing.” Lyra saw that Rainbow Dash was about to step in once more if she pushed the party pony again. So she stayed beside the box rather than confront Pinkie further.
“But…but…parties make ponies happy!” Pinkie tried to comprehend what was going on.
“I’m afraid this time it did the opposite.” Vinyl shrugged and braced herself. She knew Pinkie rather well and could imagine how she would take the news.
“My party made her feel….bad?” Pinkie stared wide-eyed at Vinyl.
“Yes…” Vinyl cringed as Pinkie Pie’s hair suddenly fell flat.
“But…parties…good.” It was obvious that something inside the constantly bouncing party pony had broken. “Parties…make pony sad?”
“Yes, Pinkie.” Vinyl remained where she was. The very same action that all other ponies mimicked.
As predicted Pinkie’s eyes well up with tears. With a loud wail she let a literal fountain burst from her tearducts as she realized she had inadvertently caused misery to another pony. It only took three seconds for Vinyl, Fluttershy and Rainbow to rush up to her after the initial torrent had been released to try and comfort the saddened pony.
Lyra, Bon Bon and Octavia tried to do the same for Fleur who still remained sobbing in her box. Rarity just watched slack-jawed at the events around her.
“Well what do we do know?” Applejack looked from on pony to another for some kind of answer.
The door to another room opened up. A trolley full of nachos came rolling through being pushed by Spike. He closed the door to the kitchen and turned to the ponies with a big smile.
“Nachos are read….y….uh. What’s going on?” Spike only saw a group of ponies attending to another one hiding in a box and Pinkie wailing and being comforted by her friends. “Party not going well?”
“I’ll talk to them.” Twilight said after a moment ignoring the question from her assistant. “This is my castle and they have no right to accost one of my guests.”
Applejack and Rarity watched Twilight stomp off towards the front door.
“Did you see anthing?” Dirt Sheet asked his photographer the instant she had landed beside him.
“Nope.” Rapid Flash blew a bubble with her chewing gum and popped the bubble before continuing. “All the windows are closed with the curtains drawn.”
“Damn!” Dirt Sheet stomped a hoof on the ground. “There’s something going on in there and I want to know what it is. Our readers deserve to know what Equestria’s premier model is doing in that castle with four known fillyfoolers and a Princess!”
“Want to look through the bins?” Rapid Flash wasn’t too keen on nosing through the Princess’ royal trash, but sometimes interesting things could be found.
“No….” Dirt Sheet had contemplated that already. They wouldn’t find anything on Fleur in those bins of that he was sure. He looked around for a moment, trying to see some way of getting into the castle.
Other reporters and photographers swarmed around the castle like moths around a flame looking for a way to snap a compromising picture or see something worthy writing about. Of course they could just fabricate some tale out of nowhere, but it was always better to have some kind of visual aid. And they really wanted to see some visual aids.
He turned his attention away from the castle for a moment. Quite some distance away he could see Slandermane standing beside his partner. Spooky Noodles seemed to take a couple of pictures, of what exactly Dirt Sheet did not know and didn’t care.
Ignoring the oddball reporters for a moment something in the back of his mind triggered. He studied the front door once more and then couldn’t help but smile. Confidently and under the curious gaze of the other reporters he strode up to the front door. As he was about to knock the door was opened by somepony from inside.
Twilight opened the door quickly to make a grand entrance or in this case a grand exit from her castle.
She blinked a few times in surprise at the mass of ponies looking at her. Slowly cameras that had been readied for a chance of taking a picture of Fleur De Lis were lowered again as Twilight was not their target.
Part of Twilight’s new courses were about addressing ponies in a more regal manner and this seemed like a good time to put her new skills to the test. She cleared her throat and held her head high to address the reporters. Before she could say a word one stallion that had been directly in front of her spoke up.
“May we come inside, your highness?” He only minimally bowed his head while his eyes darted behind Twilight to see if anything interesting could be visible.
“No.” Twilight replied and stomped a hoof on the ground to emphasize her statement. “You may not.”
“Why not?” The stallion now focused back on the Princess after it was clear there was nothing else to be seen at the moment.
“My castle is off-limits to the press.” Twilight replied in a calm tone.
“Isn’t that obstructing the freedom of the press?” Dirt Sheet still was smiling and Twilight didn’t like that one bit.
“Freedom of the press does not reach into the privacy of my home.” Twilight wasn’t the most knowledgeable pony when it came it certain laws. It was on her agenda and she would eventually get around to learning all of them.
“Really?” Dirt Sheet tried to look surprised, but the smile had turned into a vicious grin. He sensed that Equestria’s newest Princess didn’t quite know all of the boundaries the press would have to work with. “What about public places?”
“Public places?” Twilight slightly lost her advantage as she was thrown off by that question.
“Is the press allowed to report about and in public places?” Dirt Sheet was aware that the other reporters were paying very close attention.
“Yes, of course.” Twilight nodded once. The question was still confusing to her, but she hid it well.
“So….we can write about anything happening in those places and can enter without permission?” Dirt Sheet pressed on.
“Of course? It is a public place after all.”
“That means we can go into the park without any objections?” Dirt Sheet asked and saw the confusion slowly seep into the Princess’ features.
“Er…yes?”
“What about town square?”
“Naturally.”
“The lake?”
“Of course.”
“The library?” Dirt Sheet kept up his rapid questions.
“Yes, be my guest.” Twilight knew she had just stepped into a trap when Dirt Sheet’s grin turned very smug indeed.
“Excellent!” He beamed at Twilight. “So we can enter the library here without any objection.”
“Yes…no!” Twilight realized the error of her rapid answers. “You can’t right now.”
“Why is that?” Dirt Sheet asked innocently.
“It’s closed at the moment.” Twilight desperately tried thinking of some kind of good excuse.
“Closed?” The reporter looked at the sign next to the front door. It advertised the castle’s library with a sloppily written phrase that reading is fun. The opening times were sketched underneath and indicated that it would remain open for quite some time. Dirt Sheet pointed a hoof at the sign. “It doesn’t say anything about the library being closed.”
“Uh…” Twilight silently cursed that her old tree house library had been blasted to smithereens. It functioned as Ponyville’s library but was mainly her home. That gave her the option to close it anytime she so pleased. Now in her new very large castle a section was reserved for the public that they could enter whenever they so pleased and was within the allotted opening time.
“Or do you mean it is temporarily closed?” Dirt Sheet offered the Princess an opening.
“Yes!” Twilight seized it immediately. “It is closed for the time being.”
“Ah…so you are having your lunch break.” Dirt Sheet made a show of it to check the clock on the tower in the distance. “But seeing as it is so late it can’t be lunch. So a coffee break is the reason why the library is momentarily closed.”
“I…” Twilight should have followed Rarity’s advice about taking lessons dealing with these kinds of situations. Now the reigns of the conversation had fully left her control. With some effort she remained as regal as possible. “Yes….a coffee break is exactly what is going on in here right now.”
Twilight’s bluff was laughable at best. The gigantic neon sign flashing above her was a big enough clue to even the most dense reporter that a coffee break was not the only thing happening in the castle right now. Besides that Twilight was abysmal at trying to bluff her way through things. A trait that Rainbow Dash fully exploited every time they played a game of cards.
“So…that means it will reopen to the public in about fifteen minutes?” Dirt Sheet beamed at the Princess. “There are some books I just have to read right now.”
“Uhm…yes indeed….fifteen minutes.” Twilight stepped backwards into her castle and shut the door as soon as possible. Then she took the easy method of joining her friends again by teleporting into the room.
“Well? How’d it go?” Applejack asked after recovering from Twilight suddenly materializing amidst them.
“We have fifteen minutes to come up with a plan.” Twilight replied with a sigh.
Five minutes passed with the assembled ponies within the castle arguing after Twilight explained what had happened.
Rarity just watched the ponies around and tried to think of some way to help Fleur who at this time kept requesting a triple helping of chocolate fudge ice cream. She could not let her friend gorge herself on delicious sugar laden treats and potentially risk the press writing terrible things about her if they found out. The fashionista felt partly responsible for the model’s current predicament.
Had Fleur let her know that she wanted to remain incognito then she would have at least tried to hold Pinkie Pie back. Now there was a huge mess on her hooves and it would possibly get even worse once the reporters entered the castle.
“We could hide her upstairs in my private quarters.” Twilight suggested.
“Yeah, that will go down without any kind of consequences.” Lyra rolled her eyes. “I can just about see the headlines now already. Topmodel remains for a week in Princess private area. You don’t even want to see the mental image in my head of the picture they will put together.”
“Oh..uhm…” Twilight feverishly thought of something else she could do. Her knowledge was limited when it came to things related to the press. “If there was more time I am sure to find something in one of my books.”
“Well, time is not what we have right now.” Lyra glared at Twilight. “Thanks, your highness.”
“I’m sorry, ok?” Twilight met the lyrist’s glare. “I just wasn’t prepared for dealing with them.”
“It’s ok, Twi.” Applejack felt the need to stand by her friend. “We jus’ need some more time for ya ta find somethin’ useful in one of yer books.”
“We could try and sneak her out again.” Octavia left her post beside the box where Fleur was hiding and joined in the conversation.
“And then?” Lyra turned to the cellist. “We are running out of places to hide her. Besides, that isn’t really relaxing for her either.”
“They can’t enter a home without permission.” Octavia still tried to offer suggestions. “We can have her hide in one of our homes.”
“For a week?” Lyra shook her head. “It would be like prison. She couldn’t leave because then they would be on her like flies on sh…”
“What if we just make them leave?” Octavia cut Lyra off quickly. “A spell or something.”
“They would just return later.” Lyra again shook her head. “Most likely with an army of lawyers to sue us for using a spell on them.”
Rarity took note of every single word being said. Like fabric and thread she used for making dresses the suggestions flowed together in her mind and she came up with a possible solution.
“I-Deeee-Aaaaa!” Rarity called out and gained the attention of everypony around. Even Pinkie stopped her constant sobbing to listen. “What about we just give them what they want?”
“Whoa!” Lyra took a step towards the fashionista. “I am not throwing her to them!”
“No, that is not what I meant.” Rarity held up a hoof to stop Lyra’s protest. “They are reporters so why don’t we just give them another story?”
“About what?” Twilight asked for the rest of the ponies.
“Some of them are bound to be interested in the fashion side of Fleur. So we’ll just give them a fashion show and then they will have their story at least.” Rarity explained.
“What about the rest of them?” Lyra thrust a hoof towards the front door. “Not all of them are here because Fleur dresses nicely. Some of them aren’t interested in that.”
“I have a solution for that as well.” Rarity beamed. “We’ll just hide Fleur in a large enough private property.”
“Where?” Lyra looked from one pony to the other. “All our homes are rather small.”
“Sweet Apple Acres of course.” Rarity nodded to a rather surprised looking Applejack. “It is by far the largest private property in all of Ponyville. Even though it is slightly…”
“Uncouth?” Applejack raised an eyebrow as she cut off the fashionista.
“I was going to say that Sweet Apple Acres is slightly far away from all the busy and bustling center of Ponyville.”
“Nice save.” Applejack grinned and tipped her hat to Rarity.
“Of course that might just be the thing Fleur could do with.” Rarity trotted over to the box where the model still was hiding but also listening very intently.
“Well the farm is plenty big enough for another pony.” Applejack had mulled it over in her mind for a moment. “Mah family sure won’t have nothin’ against havin’ a guest for a while. Hay, ya even get the rare opportunity ta try some fresh made cider.”
“What do you say, Fleur?” Rarity gently tapped the side of the box.
For the longest moment Fleur didn’t speak or react. The model had effectively given up any hope of finding some peace and quiet. Now she was given another small piece and she tried pulling herself back together. Thoughts about ice cream were cast aside as she clambered back out of the box.
“I like that idea.” Fleur responded and stood up. Her mane was out of shape and tears had left tracks on her face, but a small hopeful smile had formed on her lips.
“Marvelous!” Rarity turned to her friends.
“That just leaves the problem of getting Fleur there, but I already have an idea.” Rarity faced Twilight. “Do you know how to recreate the spell Discord had used to elongate the legs from Fluttershy’s bunnies?”
“Er…not exactly.” Twilight shook her head. “Why do you ask?”
“We’ll have to work together to get Fleur away from here and to the farm.” Rarity looked at each pony in turn. “So I propose we give the reporters something to chase.”
Rarity turned to the still crestfallen Pinkie Pie and laid a hoof on her shoulder.
“I was thinking we could make them think that Pinkie Pie here is Fleur.” Rarity carefully ran a hoof through Pinkie’s now flat hair. “With a bit of hairspray I can easily fix Pinkie’s mane into Fleur’s style.”
“I see.” Twilight nodded as she understood what the fashionista had planned. “To bring Pinkie to Fleur’s height we would have to elongate her legs.”
Twilight rubbed her chin in thought. While she surely could learn the spell needed, time was running out. She went through some of the spells at her disposal and came up with an idea.
“How about an illusion spell?” Twilight measured up Pinkie and Fleur for a moment. “I could cast an illusion spell to make it seem as if she had Fleur’s long legs.”
“How would that look?” Rarity was curious to see the result.
Twilight shrugged and readied the spell. One flash of bright purple light later Pinkie seemed to be unchanged and still standing on her regular legs.
“The floor is disrupting the spell. She needs to be off the ground.” Twilight explained and readied a levitation spell.
“Got ya.” Rainbow Dash took action before Twilight could finish the spell and grabbed the pink pony with her legs wrapped around her body. A few flaps of her wings and she hovered a good portion above the ground with Pinkie in her grip.
The effect was slightly disturbing to say the least. While Pinkie now did indeed have legs as long as Fleur’s, the rest of her body was still in her regular proportions.
“That’s reaaaaally strange.” Vinyl watched her friend move her illusionary long legs.
“Hmmm….” Rarity felt she could work with what she had presented with. “Could you turn Pinkie into Fleur with the same spell?”
“I could, but in order to keep the spell running I would have to remain close to them as neither are unicorns that could keep it running on their own.” Twilight pointed to the hovering pair of ponies.
“That is of course unfortunate.” Rarity would have to improvise somehow. “What about smaller illusions? Would you have to remain at their side to keep them up?”
“No, but it would fizzle out after a while.” Twilight informed her friend. “The simpler the spell is, the easier it is to keep running.”
“Good.” Rarity nodded. It seemed as if she would have to give Pinkie Pie a more thorough makeover. She turned to the still hovering pink pony. “Pinkie…”
“Yes?” Pinkie still seemed upset at ruining Fleur’s vacation.
“Do you want to help us?” Rarity had to ask just to make sure. “It would involve you getting a more extensive makeover.”
“Of course!” Pinkie nodded quickly. She would just about do anything to get the other upset pony to smile properly again.
“It does involve flour.” Rarity warned. Pinkie just merely stated she was used to being covered in flour from her babysitting times. “Spike! Please fetch a bag of flour for me.”
The dragon saluted and ran off towards the kitchen. Rarity turned back to Twilight.
“Do you think you can give Pinkie Pie a horn?” She asked the Princess.
“That should be simple enough.” Twilight cast another spell and soon Pinkie found herself having a long slender horn protruding from her forehead. Reflexively she tried to touch it and her hoof just went through the illusion. “Anything else?”
“Yes….in a moment.” Rarity turned to the others again to further elaborate her plan. “We’ll need to distract the reporters, so my idea is to have Rainbow Dash make an escape with Pinkie Pie, but slow enough that they can follow you. Lead them past my boutique so that I can give them a show. I’ll need some time to set things up so lead them around for a while.”
“No problem.” Rainbow let Pinkie back down again. “I can do that easily.”
“And I’ll need some help in putting on the show.” Rarity cast her eye over the others. “I will be needing the help from Octavia, Fluttershy and Bon Bon.”
“Me?” Bon Bon had just been listening to the plan in silence. Now she seemed to be needed for some kind of fashion show of all things. The overly self conscious mare looked around to see if it had been a mere misunderstanding. “You want me to help with your show?”
“Yes, indeed.” Rarity nodded and gave the mare a friendly smile. “The others will be needed elsewhere.”
“Ok.” Bon Bon briefly locked eyes with Fleur who gave her a pleading look. In order to help her friend she would participate somehow, maybe by taking care of the lighting or music. “I will help.”
“Good.” Rarity turned to Lyra and Vinyl. “Could you two maybe arrange some kind of musical enthrallment that might distract the reporters?”
“Easily.” Vinyl just shrugged, but Lyra shook her head.
“They won’t fall for a little bit of music.” Lyra had agreed with the fashionista’s plan up until this point. She knew that the reporters would need something a little more noteworthy than loud music and had come up with her own plan. “I have a better idea to distract some of them, but I’ll need Vinyl’s help.”
“It doesn’t involve heavy carrying does it?” Vinyl gave Lyra a sideways look.
“Nothing of the kind.” Lyra replied with a lopsided grin. Vinyl didn’t like that grin one bit, but without any other options on such short notice just agreed to help Lyra.
“That just leaves getting Fleur to Sweet Apple Acres.” Rarity turned to Applejack. “And it is up to you to get her there without being seen.”
“Hmm…” Applejack knew Ponyville like the back of her hoof and was the best candidate to get the model there unseen. “That’ll be mighty difficult with Rainbow an’ Pinkie flying all over the place.”
“Perhaps Twilight might offer some assistance?” Rarity looked at the pony in question. “Do you think you could make them invisible?”
“That should work.” Twilight nodded without having to think about it for long. “I can link my spell to Fleur’s own magic and it should last them long enough to reach the farm, but you will have to leave your hat.”
“Awww…”
Spike returned with a large brown paper sack and put it down beside Pinkie Pie. Rarity rubbed her front hooves together with anticipation.
“We have a plan so let’s get started.” Rarity immediately grabbed a can of hairspray from her saddlebags in the corner along with a hairbrush. As she began to work on Pinkie Pie, Twilight addressed Applejack and Fleur.
“Please stand next to each other.” Twilight asked and waited for the tall model to move beside the farmpony. “I will cast the invisibility spell on you now and link it with your magic. You must remain close to each other, otherwise the spell might break. Oh and don’t cast any magic of your own for the time being. That might also disrupt my spell.”
Fleur nodded and held her reflexive magical defense in check as she felt Twilight’s spell being cast on her. It seemed to her as if nothing happened, but then after a moment her vision became a tiny bit darker. Fleur held up a hoof to see what was going on, but found herself staring at nothing. Only when her hoof made contact with her nose did she know that the spell had worked as intended.
“This is sorta freaky.” Applejack said unseen by anypony. “Uhm…how do we not get separated?”
“Use this scarf.” Rarity levitated a blue scarf over to the area where she assumed Applejack was. A moment later the scarf was plucked from her grasp by invisible hooves.
“Good idea. Ah’ll hold it in my mouth and you jus’ follow it, ok?” Applejack waved the scarf around for a moment. She made it look like the delicate light scarf was being blown around by the wind.
“Got it.” Fleur confirmed the plan and felt excitement building up inside her. Perhaps not all was lost after all and she could find some refuge amongst Ponyville’s apple orchards.
“Hmm…this is as good as it gets I’m afraid.” Rarity took a step back from Pinkie Pie. Even in the flat form her mane was incredibly stubborn to take on the shape Rarity was trying to make. With a lot of hairspray she did manage to wrestle it into a shape resembling Fleur’s manestyle. Now all that was left was to coat the partypony in flour to emulate Fleur’s natural white coat. “Close your eyes, Pinkie.”
She did as ordered and Rarity simply dumped the flour all over the formerly and now white partypony. Rarity shook Pinkie’s mane and tail using her magic to shake some of the flour out, but leaving enough in to make it resemble Fleur’s colors.
“Wait, this isn’t….” Pinkie began to object, but was interrupted as somepony banged loudly on the front door.
“No time!” Rarity stepped away from Pinkie Pie and let Rainbow Dash grab her again. “As they say in the business: It’s showtime!”
“I suggest we all leave at the same time.” Rarity instructed the waiting ponies. “While we leave through the front door Rainbow will take Pinkie out through one of the upper windows and lead the reporters away.”
Rainbow Dash nodded in confirmation and flew up into position with Pinkie in her grasp. Fleur and Applejack waited a few paces behind their friends. The only clue to their whereabouts was the scarf Rarity had given them.
“We take the direct route to my boutique while Lyra and Vinyl do whatever they have planned.” Rarity explained further and ignored the knocking on the front door. Lyra saluted while grinning widely.
“What about us?” Twilight asked and pointed her hoof at herself and Spike standing beside her. “Do you want us to help with the fashion show?”
“No, dear.” Rarity shook her head. “You have the most important task. You have to find some legal way in one of your books to see if there is some way to keep those nasty reporters away from Fleur while she is here.”
“Right.” Twilight had already begun compiling a list in her head with all the books she would have to consult. “You can leave it to us. If there is a way, we will find it.”
“Take a deep breath, ladies.” Rarity instructed and took a deep breath herself. With her magic she unlocked the front door and opened it.
The torrent of nosy reporters was stemmed by Lyra and Bon Bon in the first row. The former using maybe a tad too much force to push the reporters back.
“Move it!” Lyra snapped at the nearest reporter. “Ponies want to get out.”
Cameras had been readied and pointed towards the ponies coming out of the castle. As their initial target was not to be seen they only half heartedly took one or two pictures out of reflex.
“Where is Fleur?” One of the more vocal reporters asked.
“Who’s that?” Lyra’s bluff was about as convincing as Twilight’s bluff earlier.
“There she is!” One stallion pointed a hoof up towards a window. On cue Rainbow Dash had made her exit and rather slowly let the assembled mass of ponies get a look at the fake Fleur in her hooves. Before anypony could see through the deception Rainbow sped off. Not wasting a moment the group of reporters bolted after the fleeing pegasus.
After the dust had settled the now alone ponies couldn’t help but smile. So far their plan had worked, but the real diversion would now begin.
Rarity split off from the group with her helpers and quickly made their way towards the boutique. Lyra and Vinyl briskly trotted towards Lyra’s home while the invisible Applejack and Fleur took the long road towards Sweet Apple Acres.
“What do you have planned?” Vinyl asked Lyra for the third time. “And don’t say you’ll see!”
“You will find out.” Lyra grinned back but chose to give Vinyl a bit more information. “Rarity’s idea with the fashion show is nice, but it will not occupy the reporters that are only interested in more….uhm…unusual stuff.”
“Unusual stuff? Like what?”
“You’ll see.” Lyra chuckled as Vinyl groaned in frustration of not receiving a clear answer.
“Quickly now!” Rarity opened the door to her boutique and led the way inside. “We only have a small time to prepare. I’ll take care of the advertising outside and prepare the stage.”
Rarity ushered the three mares over to the little stage in the middle of her shop’s showroom. Octavia looked around with interest. She had never actually been here before since moving to Ponyville some time ago. Her interest in dresses had been minimal at best. A collar and bowtie was all she needed on a day to day basis. The girlish side of her was looking forward to playing dress up, something she had not done during her childhood.
Fluttershy was less enthused about having to model some dresses for the reporters. It wasn’t the part about dressing up nicely that she disliked, but rather the fact she would have a lot of ponies watching her. Her time as a model for Photo Finish had not been pleasant and she had only gone along with it for her friend. As Fleur was a pony in need she felt it necessary to put her discomfort to the side for the moment and participate in the upcoming show.
Bon Bon had been scowling all the way over to the boutique. She was less than happy to take part in some kind of fashion show. It wasn’t a secret that the sweetmaker was slightly obsessed with her weight. Ponies would look at her funnily anytime she brought up that topic as it was clear that Bon Bon had a good figure and didn’t need to worry about her weight. Naturally she didn’t listen and assumed they were just being polite. It had developed over time in her resenting Rarity for no other reason than she being a fashionista and thus responsible for putting the idea into pony’s minds that all models needed to be super thin.
On occasion she had expressed her one sided dislike towards the fashionista by simply pretending not to know who she was or did. If Rarity held any animosity towards the sweetmaker it was never shown and that just ticked Bon Bon off even further. Even stranger was the fact that the weight obsessed mare was good friends with not only a super thin model, but also the most famous one of them all. And it was for her sake alone that Bon Bon held her tongue in check as she was directed by the fashionista towards the back area behind the stage.
Rarity quickly divided the numerous dresses on clothes-racks amongst the three mares and instructed them on what to do. Octavia happily picked out a first dress to wear, Fluttershy meekly took the first one in the row and Bon Bon just randomly picked one while grinding her teeth.
Rarity spent little time preparing the stage. All she did was adjust the lighting and turning on some classical music. Having Vinyl here would have been preferable, but it would do for now. It took her a couple of minutes to locate her sign. It had seen better days and was a relic from the time she had put on a fashion show with her friends a long time ago. Out of sentimental value she had not disposed of it and now it seemed it would be put to good use.
Outside not a single pony was seen. The sun had begun its decent and it would be dark in two hours or so. Most ponies would most likely be at home preparing dinner. That made it easier to locate the crowd of reporters following Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie through the streets of the town. Numerous hooves pounding on the ground could easily be heard and from its sound they seemed to be coming closer.
Rarity quickly set up her sign and waited for any activity heading towards her. She didn’t have to wait for long as Rainbow Dash with her cargo rounded a corner at the end of the street. Rainbow Dash was flying at a rather leisurely pace, at least for her standards, but despite the slower speed the reporters were struggling to keep up.
The pegasus zoomed past Rarity and only a hooffull of seconds later the reporters came galloping past Carousel Boutique. Rarity cleared her throat and addressed the crowd loud enough to be heard.
“Esteemed journalists of the fashion-world!” Rarity used her magic to illuminate her sign. “Now is your one time chance for an exclusive fashion show!”
The mass of reporters slowed down and came to a stop in front of the boutique. All of them were breathing heavily and kept nervously glancing between the shop and Rainbow Dash circling slowly at the end of the road.
“Is Fleur going to participate?” A mare asked while wheezing heavily.
“No, she is not.” Rarity saw that they were about to leave again. “But you will have the only chance to view Fancy Pants exclusive collections for the next two seasons!”
A small murmur of excitement went through some of the reporters. Rarity smiled politely and opened the door to invite them inside. As predicted some of the reporters more interested in the fashion aspect indeed went inside.
“Wanna go?” Quick Shot asked and readied his camera.
“No….” Scoop was not too keen on attending the show. “I’m not interested in dresses, but rather what’s underneath. Let’s go!”
Only a third of the reporters actually went inside the boutique. The rest bolted towards Rainbow Dash who then stopped circling to lead them somewhere else. Rarity hoped the others would have some good plan to keep the rest of them occupied.
Despite Vinyl’s constant questions regarding her plan the lyrist remained silent. All she had said was that they needed some vital pieces from her home and Vinyl had no choice but to follow her. When Lyra led the way into the bedroom Vinyl felt the need to speak up again.
“What do you have planned?” Vinyl noticed that unlike the rest of the home the bedroom was chaos in its purest form. Magazines were strewn everywhere, some of them about fashion, sweets or other relatively normal topics. Some of them were of a more adult variety she noticed.
“We need a disguise!” Lyra trotted over to the large wardrobe and opened it. Moments later she levitated a large chest out. It was big enough to house a laying down pony with ease.
“A disguise?” Vinyl watched as Lyra opened the chest revealing a mishmash of various articles of clothing. “For what?”
“We’ll give them something to write about.” Lyra rummaged around in the chest for a moment. “Where is it?”
“Need any help?” Vinyl offered while casually looking at one of the more adult magazines lying open on the floor.
“I thought I….aha!” Lyra exclaimed triumphantly as she finally found what she was looking for. Without another word she pulled a mask over her head. A purple mask hiding her features with a large hat. “Tadaaa!”
“What are you supposed to be?” Vinyl assumed it was some kind of comic book character.
“The Mysterious Mare-Do-Well!” Lyra thrust a hoof towards the ceiling and struck a pose.
“Who’s that?” Vinyl wasn’t much of a comic book buff.
“You don’t know?” Lyra took off the mask again and held it in her hoof. “Ah, no you wouldn’t know her. It was something that Rainbow Dash’s friends did.”
“Huh?” Vinyl had not been living in Ponyville at the time and thus had never even heard of Mare-Do-Well.
“I’ll explain later.” Lyra looked around and found the rest of the costume lying on a pile in the corner of the room. Without any other explanation she trotted over and started putting the costume together.
Vinyl shrugged and decided to have a look in the chest for something else that she might be able to wear. “I am guessing we’ll be some kind of superhero team?”
“Keep guessing.” Lyra grinned unseen by Vinyl and began climbing into the Mare-Do-Well costume.
“What…the…hay…” Vinyl spoke slowly with some amusement in her voice and turned to Lyra with something she had found in the chest. “What are these?”
The DJ held a blonde wig with a cheap felt cowpony hat in one hoof, while a pair of fake cyan Pegasus wings along with a rainbow colored wig were being held in the other hoof. Vinyl’s grin nearly split her face at the momentarily stunned look Lyra was giving her.
“You didn’t see nothing!” As quick as a flash Lyra snatched the objects from Vinyl and stuffed them back into the chest.
“Just why do you have those things?” Vinyl laughed as Lyra shoved the wigs into the chest.
“None of your business!” Lyra snapped back.
“Does Bon Bon know you sometimes parade around in a Rainbow Dash costume?” Vinyl just had to needle the other unicorn a bit further. A small bit of revenge for Lyra keeping her in the dark about her plan thus far.
“Of course she does!” Lyra seemed genuinely offended that Vinyl would think she dressed up while alone. “We…we like to role play sometimes. Adds a little spice if you know what I mean.” Lyra added after a moment.
“As Applejack and Rainbow Dash?” Vinyl shook her head with amusement.
“Sometimes.”
“Sometimes? Do you have any other wigs I should know about?” Vinyl already assumed that Lyra had the full set to dress up as the element bearers.
“You most certainly do not need to know about them!” Lyra carefully put the fake cowpony hat in the chest covering up an electric blue wig with a cheap par of purple sunglasses and a jet black wigs with a lacy bowtie. She hoped Vinyl had not seen those particular items as she closed the chest and levitated it back into the wardrobe.
“Hey, don’t put it away.” Vinyl noticed that Lyra closed the doors with enough force to make a point that Vinyl was forbidden to try and open them again. “What about my costume?”
“Your costume is in the living room.” Lyra trotted out of the room a fetch whatever she had planned Vinyl to wear. It only took her a couple of seconds and didn’t give Vinyl the opportunity to have a snoop around in the chest. “Here it is.”
Vinyl caught the bundle of clothes that the lyrist had tossed to her. She didn’t have to examine what it was she held in her hooves as she instantly recognized it from before.
“No.” Vinyl replied with a flat look.
“Why not?” Lyra tried not to smile and failed miserably. “Come on, come on. We haven’t got much time left and I need my sidekick.”
“Oh, you’ll get a kick to the side alright if you think I am going outside in that!” Vinyl dropped the raunchy outfit on the floor. “What kind of a sidekick am I supposed to be? Captain Scandalous and her sidekick Spanky answer all questions that you dared not ask before?”
“Hmmm…” Lyra thought about it for a moment. “While I do like the sound of that we are not giving them an interview.”
“What then?” Vinyl sat down and crossed her forelegs in front of her chest. She wasn’t doing anything unless Lyra explained what her plan actually was.
“We’ll distract them.” Lyra nodded to the bundle of clothes in front of Vinyl. “Give them a glimpse that might distract them long enough for Fleur to make a getaway.”
“A glimpse?” Vinyl looked at the outfit on the floor. “They’ll recognize me!”
“Relax.” Lyra held up a hoof to calm down the DJ’s protest. “They expect that from you anyway.”
“They? Who is they?” Vinyl was genuinely baffled that somepony was expecting her to wear something like that out in public.
“The smut patrol calling themselves reporters.” Lyra shrugged. “You are a DJ and it is expected that you act a little wild.”
“I don’t know what kind of DJ’s you know, but I do not go wild like that!” Vinyl flicked the pile on the floor with a hoof. “I am not exposing myself that way.”
“Ok, ok.” Lyra nudged the outfit closer to Vinyl. “I thought you might object and thus I have the means to hide your true identity.”
“Really? How?” Vinyl remained skeptical.
“Just put it on and you’ll see.” Lyra returned putting on her own costume.
Vinyl sighed and took apart the bundle of clothes. The sight of the socks and the ridiculous saddle made her blush. Despite the outrageous premise Lyra’s plan would indeed distract the reports for a while. For Fleur’s sake she began to put on the first article of clothing, but paused halfway as she was now aware that Lyra was watching her intently.
“I can’t do this if you are watching.”
“Ok, ok.” Lyra held up her front hooves in defeat and trotted past Vinyl. “I’ll be waiting downstairs in the kitchen.”
Lyra quickly trotted downstairs and searched for something she would need momentarily. Only a few minutes later she heard Vinyl come down the stairs. A second later the fully dressed DJ entered the kitchen wearing not only the outfit but also a very prominent blush. Her head would easily pass as a tomato, a very uncomfortable tomato.
“Suits you.” Lyra said after whistling appreciatively at the sight.
“Shut up.” Vinyl felt strangely exposed which was odd as she normally was naked. “Let’s just get this over with. How do you want to hide me?”
“With this!” Lyra held a small bag of flour in her hoof. “It worked for Pinkie earlier and it will work for you.”
“Flour?”
“Yep. I’ll just cover up your cutiemark and powder your mane and tail.” Lyra said and immediately began to do just that with her magic.
“Where did you get this outfit from anyway?” Vinyl asked while Lyra applied the flour.
“Rarity made it.” Lyra concentrated on the task in front of her.
“She did?” Vinyl had no idea what Rarity actually offered to make in her shop. The only times she had been there had been purely social visits or helping her with her fashions show by supplying the music. “I didn’t know she made these kind of things too.”
“I had to beg and promise her not to tell anypony where it was from.” Lyra paused for a moment. “Whoops.”
“The secret will be safe with me.” Vinyl had a good relationship with the fashionista and would not jeopardize it by spreading any rumors.
After a while Lyra was satisfied with her work and stepped away from Vinyl to give her one last look all over.
“Here.” Lyra levitated a pair of black sunglasses over to the DJ. “For a bit more anonymity.”
Vinyl took off her regular pair of sunglasses and donned the black pair. It was still obvious to recognize Vinyl if one looked close enough, but as they had no real intention of standing still the disguise would work.
“Good.” There was one last thing that ruined the picture slightly. “You can stop blushing now.”
“I can’t.” Vinyl really wished she knew the invisibility spell Twilight had used earlier. It would be very useful right about now.
“It kind of ruins the overall effect.” Lyra scrunched up her nose in thought.
“Well sorry…” Vinyl huffed and sat down. “I can’t just switch it on and off I’m afraid.”
“No problem.” Lyra levitated the bag of flour once more. “We’ll just cover it up.”
After applying nearly all of the flour left to Vinyl’s face Lyra had managed to mask the constant blush. Happy with the result she led the way to the front door.
“Ready?” Lyra asked.
“I guess…” Vinyl wasn’t too thrilled to expose herself like that to the public, but in absence of any other plan she would go along with it.
They left the house and mercifully nopony else was around to witness the strange pair. They slowly made their way to the end of the road.
“When they see us…” Vinyl asked with a hushed voice. “What do we do then?”
“We run.” Lyra answered, her voice muffled by the mask she was wearing.
“Run? Run where? Back home?”
“Nah. We give them a run around Ponyville.”
“Wait, wait, wait.” Vinyl stopped immediately. “We run around Ponyville? Like this? You never said anything about running!”
“You keep saying you want to go jogging.” Lyra shrugged and despite her wearing the mask Vinyl could see her grin wide. “Now at least you have some incentive to go through with it and not get caught.”
“I never signed on for any kind of physical exercise!” While it was true that Vinyl kept telling herself and others that she could do with some exercise, this scenario was not the way she had imagined it. “Forget it! I am going home and will follow Rarity’s plan.”
“Too late…” Lyra stared at the end of the road where Rainbow Dash came flying around the corner.
The pegasus did a double take as she saw the painfully familiar figure of Mare-Do-Well standing in the middle of the road. She nearly let Pinkie fall when she spotted the figure next to Mare-Do-Well wearing what only could be described as provocative. It took a moment for Rainbow Dash to realize that it had to be Lyra and Vinyl executing their plan. Rainbow and Pinkie flew by, both of them eyeing the pair with wide eyes, and only moments later the reporters rounded the corner.
“Time for a little jog, Vinyl.” Lyra murmured and got ready to run away.
Scoop froze in mid-gallop as her eyes locked on to the two ponies in the middle of the road.
Her sudden stop caused the majority of ponies behind her to barrel into her. As they crashed into a pile voice were raised at the sudden obstacle. All of them went quiet as they too saw the pair of ponies standing in the road.
“Holy hay!” Quick Shot struggled to ready his camera from his prone position on the floor.
The two ponies turned around and ran. Reporters quickly struggled to get back on their hooves. Fleur was one thing, but being presented by something that raunchy in this quaint little town shifted their priorities.
Scoop held her photographer back when he tried running after the fleeing pair. He gave her a perplexed look and tried to go around his partner.
“It’s a trap!” Scoop barked at him. She had to raise her voice to get through the noise being produced by numerous hooves trampling on the ground. In turn a few other reporters had heard her too and stopped their movement towards the scandalous pair running away.
“But did you see what that mare was wearing?” Quick Shot lamented.
“I got a nose for these kind of things!” Scoop answered and watched half of the reporters bolt down the road.
“But…but…socks! And a lacy saddle!”
“It is just a diversion.” Scoop looked around and cursed under her breath. She had lost sight of Fleur being transported by that pegasus. It suddenly dawned on her that it might also have just been a trick. “They are giving us plenty of distractions to draw us away from Fleur.”
“You sure about that?” Quick Shot remained skeptical.
“Her friends are very resourceful it seems.” Scoop rubbed her chin with a hoof in thought. “I bet that the pair just then were two of her friends. I also have my doubts if the Fleur we have been chasing was the correct one.”
“What now?” The photographer sighed and gave up his efforts to run after the distraction. He knew Scoop well enough to follow her lead and be rewarded with possibly better pictures. Although it would have to be something very spectacular to beat what he had just seen.
“There isn’t a train leaving for another six hours.” Scoop turned around on the spot to see what else was going on. “I bet they are hiding Fleur someplace in Ponyville.”
“The castle?”
“No. Dirt Sheet made pretty clear that we have the right to enter it and the Princess didn’t object.” Scoop was momentarily at a loss of where to go. “We best check the places where no reporters are at the moment. Come on.”
Quick shot obediently followed his partner. A moment later the rest of the left over reporters followed them as well.
Unseen by anypony Applejack led Fleur through Ponyville.
They had agreed to take a slower route to insure that they wouldn’t get separated. Being invisible felt strange to both of them. Looking down and not seeing one’s own body was scary.
Applejack held a scarf in her mouth and occasionally waved it about to make it appear as if it was blowing in the wind. The absence of any wind made it highly suspicious, but until now they had not encountered another pony.
“Ya still with me?” Applejack asked with a whisper.
“Yes.” Fleur’s answer startled Applejack as she seemed to be right beside her.
For a tiny moment Applejack let go of the scarf and it would have to be just this moment when a breeze went through the street. The scarf now actually being moved by the wind drifted away from the invisible mares.
“Darn it! Ah let go of it!” Applejack informed the model somewhere beside her. “Quick! Don’t let it get away!”
Applejack jumped to catch the scarf. Fleur did the same and both of them found out the hard way that they had aimed for the same spot.
Fleur having the advantage of longer legs reached the scarf first and pinned it to the ground with a hoof. Applejack wasn’t able to react in any way and slammed hard into the models side. Out of reflex Fleur readied a spell meant for self-defense. The result was rather unexpected. Twilight had mentioned not to cast any spells otherwise it might disrupt her illusion. Quickly Fleur let the magic she had summoned for her spell dissipate, but the damage had already been done.
“Ah can see your head.” Applejack stated after recovering from the initial shock of seeing a disembodied head floating in front of her.
“I can see your body.” Fleur replied and scrunched up her face at the sight.
“Mah body?” Applejack seemingly looked down and the backwards to check. Fleur had to guess as all she could see was Applejack’s neck bending one way then the other. “What about mah head?”
“It’s still invisible.” Fleur checked her own body and found it still to be absent.
“Oh, fer cryin’ out loud.” Applejack quickly scanned the area and let out a sigh of relief that they were still alone. “Can ya do the spell that Twilight used?”
“I have no knowledge of spells of that kind, sorry.” Fleur’s magical abilities were rather limited she would reluctantly admit if asked. For a model it was not necessary to have a vast amount of spells at her disposal.
“Ok, ok. Lemme think.” Applejack sat down. Fleur looked away as looking at the decapitated farmpony gave her the creeps.
Applejack considered moving back towards the castle, but there was an awful lot of empty space surrounding it. The chances of them being spotted were very high. Combined with the fact that she didn’t know where Rainbow Dash currently was distracting the reporters made that option out of the question. The way to Sweet Apple Acres wasn’t too far away.
“Ah know!” Applejack trotted over and took the scarf in her hooves. “We’ll use this.”
“How?” Fleur looked at the scarf. It was far too small to hide them or even cover up part of them.
“We’ll wear it.” Applejack wrapped it around her invisible head. “See?”
“No….I don’t.”
“We take this scarf and wrap it around our heads.” Applejack explained and held it towards Fleur. “Ya will have ta be my head. Yer taller than me and can rest yer head on mine…. ”
Fleur understood and nodded. It would look strange, but at a casual glance nopony would notice anything wrong. The model stepped next to the farmpony and rested her chin on top of Applejack’s head. Using the scarf they tied it together. Fleur rearranged some of her mane to try and cover up the hole visible from the front.
“Ok then.” Applejack blew a strand from Fleur’s mane out of her eyes. “Ah can’t really see well so ya will have ta keep an eye out fer anythin’ in out way.”
“Which way do we go?” Fleur asked and then got moving in the direction Applejack’s hoof pointed.
Walking side by side wasn’t easy and it was made even more difficult by not being able to see Fleur’s legs. Slowly they moved towards their original destination, appearing to other ponies had they been looking like a drunken pony with a questionable fashion sense.
Rainbow Dash circled slowly in the middle of a large crossing.
For some reason the reporters had stopped following them. Her first thought had been that she had been too fast and had decided to wait a moment. After waiting for two minutes no reporter showed up and Rainbow Dash assumed that they had fallen for Lyra’s plan and were now following them.
It was a good thing that they had done so, because Rainbow Dash was beginning to tire out. She wouldn’t admit it to anypony, but flying around for an extended period of time with a pony in her grasp wasn’t easy.
The only pony she rather frequently took out for flying had been Scootaloo and she would usually be on the adult pagasus’ back. Carrying a pony with her hooves was difficult, especially an adult pony like Pinkie Pie who also seemed to weigh considerably more than she appeared to.
Briefly scanning the area Rainbow spotted a bush they could use as a hiding spot for her to have a little break. After landing unseen inside the bush the pegasus just let herself drop on top of Pinkie Pie knowing that the party pony wouldn’t mind carrying her weight for a moment. Sweaty and tried Rainbow Dash let her wings hang limply down and resting on Pinkie’s sides.
Slightly paranoid that they had been spotted Rainbow stuck her head out the top of the bush. Pinkie did the same and pressed her head against the side of Rainbow’s. Cheek to cheek they observed the surrounding area and found it void of anypony.
“Good.” Rainbow breathed a sigh of relief and retracted her head back into the bush. Pinkie kept pressing her cheek against Rainbow’s. “Uh…Pinkie? Do you mind?”
Rainbow Dash tried pulling away from Pinkie, but the pink pony just remained where she was.
“I can’t, sorry.” Pinkie answered.
“What do you mean?” Rainbow tried pulling her head further away. As that led to no results she wanted to use a hoof to push the pink pony’s head away. At least that was her plan, but she found it impossible to move her front legs to release the grip she was still holding on with. “What did you do?”
“I didn’t do anything.” Pinkie explained. “It was Spike.”
“Spike? What?”
“He didn’t cover me with flour.” Pinkie explained calmly. “He used powdered sugar instead. I think we are stuck.”
“You are kidding me right?” Rainbow Dash was far from calm. To her horror she found out that Pinkie Pie was correct with her statement. The combination of Rainbow’s sweating and Pinkie’s sugarcoating had glued them together. Try as she might the Pegasus found it impossible to move. “This is some kind of joke right?”
“Afraid not.” Pinkie giggled. “It seems to be quite the sticky situation.”
“No puns!” Rainbow Dash found the situation out of her hooves. Not moving was unpleasant, but the possibility of being caught was worse. “We have to do something.”
“It’s only sugar. We just need some water.” Pinkie suggested.
“There are no rainclouds here today.” Even if there had been rainclouds above them it would have been impossible to reach them as Rainbow’s wings were also glued to Pinkie’s side.
“It is only sugar. We can eat it.” Pinkie proceeded to start licking the side of her cheek where Rainbow was stuck.
“Cut it out!” Rainbow Dash protested as Pinkie’s freakishly long tongue wiped over her face for a moment. “I am not letting myself get licked free by you or anypony. Besides….it would take too long.”
Rainbow Dash contemplated their location in Ponyville. The river or the lake was too far away. A well was relatively close by, but they would have to walk across the marketplace. By this time most ponies would have closed their stalls, but a restaurant nearby would be able to spot them easily. The only other option was going back to the castle.
“We’ll go to the castle!” Rainbow Dash said after making up her mind. “We can cut through a few narrow alleyways and avoid being seen.”
“We could just ask somepony for help here.” Pinkie suggested.
“No… we are not going to involve other ponies in this.” Rainbow Dash dismissed Pinkie’s suggestion by shaking her head and Pinkie’s along with her. “And want Twilight to see what Spike has done. Then she might not object too much when I glue him to the ceiling.”
“So….how do we get there?” Pinkie’s question was a good one. With Rainbow Dash immobilized it would have to be up to Pinkie to get them there.
“Can you walk?” Rainbow asked. Pinkie tried to move her legs, but Rainbow’s own legs were positioned such that walking properly was out of the question.
“I don’t think so.” Pinkie replied after trying to move her limbs. “I won’t be able to hop, skip or jump either.”
“Great….just great.”
“I can shuffle a bit.” Pinkie said after a moment of silence.
“Better than nothing.” It was their only chance at mobility. “Ok then. Get shuffling Pinkie!”
“I am not going on stage like this!” Bon Bon sat down and crossed her forelegs to indicate she wouldn’t be moving from her spot.
“Why not?” Octavia turned to face the mare.
“I look like a badly wrapped sweet.” Bon Bon huffed. “A fat badly wrapped sweet!”
“Nonsense!” Octavia could not see the resemblance. “You look fantastic!”
Bon Bon merely grunted at the compliment. The poofy dress that Rarity had picked out for Bon Bon wasn’t her style. Then again practically no style was Bon Bon’s style as far as she was concerned.
“I’m not going out there.”
The noise from the assembled and no doubt impatient ponies could clearly be heard behind the thick curtains.
“It's all of them looking at you, isn’t it?” Fluttershy quietly asked. Bon Bon didn’t answer and remained frozen in protest. “I understand. I just pretend I am walking over a meadow and all of the ponies are woodland critters. That always helps me.”
Bon Bon once grunted in response once more.
“Ok, places ladies, places.” Rarity came trotting behind the curtain and froze at the sight before her. “Oh, heavens no! You cannot possibly wear that! You look ridiculous!”
Bon Bon was about to retort with a rather harsh comeback, thinking it had been the fashionista’s way to get revenge on her by belittling her in front of others. As she turned to the fashionista Bon Bon realized that Rarity was in fact addressing Octavia.
“Why?” The cellist was confused.
“You mixed up the outfits didn’t you?” Rarity asked and used her magic to remove the hat Octavia had been wearing.
“Uhm…yes? “ Octavia shrugged. “I thought we were just supposed to wear something we liked.”
“No, no, dear.” Rarity levitated the original hat over and placed in on top of the cellist’s head. “They are all color-coordinated. Mixing them up ruins the effect.”
“Oh, sorry.” Octavia was pretty much clueless about the finer points to dressing in style.
“No worries. Just keep to one outfit at a time.” Rarity turned to the other two mares dressed and waiting. Or in the case of Bon Bon dressed and looking grumpy.
“You two look perfect.” Rarity beamed at the pair.
“Seriously?” Bon Bon raised an eyebrow. “You really mean that?”
“Why yes I do.” Rarity only now registered the facial expression of the sweetmaker. “What is wrong?”
“Bon Bon is having second thoughts about going out there.” Fluttershy informed her friend.
“But why, dear?” Rarity trotted up to the sitting mare and checked her dress to see if anything was out of order.
“I am going to look like a huge fat sweet!” Bon Bon huffed once more.
“Says who?” Rarity was genuinely taken aback that somepony would think so. “You look perfect! The colors really compliment your coat and mane. Nopony in their right mind could possibly think negatively about you.”
“You really mean that?” Bon Bon remained skeptical.
“Of course!” Rarity beamed at the earthpony. “You will wow them, of that I am sure.”
Time was slowly beginning to run out on them and the reporters were beginning to grow restless. Rarity was well aware of it and ushered her three models towards the curtain. Bon Bon reluctantly complied for now. She was still convinced that it would all have some kind of negative repercussions for her later, but if it would buy Fleur some time it was just something she would have to face.
On Rarity’s signal Fluttershy walked on stage. Of the three she had the most experience in being on stage during a fashion show. Octavia and Bon Bon watched through a gap in the curtain. Fluttershy did her job well enough to spurn the reporters on to take a few pictures. In her mind she was doing exactly that what she had advised Bon Bon to do earlier and imagined herself being alone in a grass field with a bunch of bunnies watching her. It made the entire thing more bearable.
Octavia enjoyed the little show a lot. She naturally knew the piece of classical music Rarity had chosen as background music and lightly swayed along with the melody. Once Fluttershy was back the cellist confidently strode out on stage. Unlike the Pegasus before, Octavia actually liked being on stage and the attention focused on her. With maybe a bit too much of a bounce in her steps she reached the end of the stage. With a grin she made a little twirl to show off the dress and bowed. Behind the stage Rarity snorted briefly at the behavior of the mare. It was highly unprofessional, but that was to be expected by somepony doing this for the very first time.
Then came Bon Bon’s turn. With slightly rigid steps she walked on stage once Octavia was back. With a herculean effort she turned her grumpy frown into an obviously plastic fake smile. No twirls, no bows and no chance of her giving the reporters a genuine smile. Yet it seemed as if that was exactly what they wanted to see as the flashlights flared up from numerous pictures being taken of her. With a bad feeling about all of it she headed back towards the curtain, ready to switch dresses and do it all over again.
“Shuffle harder!” Rainbow Dash urged Pinkie Pie on.
“I am doing my best!” Pinkie replied slightly out of breath. “It’s not like I’m shuffling every day!”
Their way of getting around was not what one would call efficient. Pinkie did her best to shuffle as fast as she could, but they were travelling at half a trot maximum. Another problem was that Pinkie left a very obvious trail behind her in the dirt. If anypony was curious enough to follow it they would find something very strange indeed. Rainbow Dash was not too happy to let that happen, especially with a bunch of nosy reporters all about.
“Faster Pinkie, faster!” Rainbow urged her friend on.
“I’m going as fast as I…whoa!”
Pinkie tripped by shuffling straight into a pothole. With a simultaneous “Oof!” both of them landed on their side in the middle of the road. They had managed to traverse over the first road unseen and then through an alleyway. Now it seemed as if their journey had ended.
“Stupid pothole!” Pinkie voiced her frustration.
“Please tell me you can get back up.” Rainbow Dash asked with worry evident in her voice.
“I…urrgh…am…gnnrr…trying.” Pinkie tried rocking back and forth in some kind of effort to get her hooves underneath her. After a few minutes it proved to be fruitless and she gave up. “I can’t get back up.”
“What do we do now?” Rainbow Dash was out of ideas.
“What to give the licking another try?” Pinkie asked.
“That’s the last resort!” Rainbow Dash could just about see the headlines if they ever were caught in the middle of the road licking sugar off each other’s coats. “Try something else first!”
The sound of hooves on the ground making their way slowly towards them made them freeze solid. There was no way that whoever was approaching could not see them. The sound of steps stopped after a moment and Rainbow Dash with Pinkie craned their heads back to see who it was.
Berry Punch stood a few trots away from the fallen pair and just stared at them. Then she blinked a few times and hiccupped once.
“Could you maybe give us a hoof here?” Rainbow Dash asked from her prone position.
“Get a *hic* room you two.” Berry Punch replied and proceeded on her way past the pair on the ground.
“Why would we need a room?” Pinkie asked after a brief moment of quiet contemplation.
Rainbow chose not to answer that question and tried using her brain to come up with some kind of genius plan to get out of their current predicament. As was to be expected she came up with nothing. She was just about to give in to her fate to be discovered by the press and her life turned into a joke when another voice spoke up. To Rainbow Dash it sounded like an angelic chorus sent by Celestia herself.
“Do you need any help?” A voice asked from above.
“Derpy!” Rainbow Dash would have jumped for joy if she could have. “Yes! Please! We really need some help here!”
“Sure thing.” Derpy landed beside them and circled around them once. “Uhm…what should I do?”
“First just get us up on Pinkie’s hooves again.” Rainbow did not want to spend another second lying in the street.
“Ok.” Derpy carefully slid her front hooves under Rainbow’s side.
Her job as Ponyville’s mailmare required her to deliver all kinds of packages around town. Some of them were rather heavy and thus over time the grey pegasus had developed a fair bit of strength. With ease she propped the stuck pair up now sitting on their rump. Derpy trotted behind them to lift Pinkie up on her hindlegs.
Rainbow breathed a sigh of relief at being upright again. Now there was only one last thing Derpy had to take care of.
“Thank you so much!” Rainbow Dash felt like hugging the mare. “Now please fetch a few clouds to make us a raincloud or even better get a bucket of water.”
“I…uh…can’t” Derpy replied after a moment.
“Why not?” Rainbow Dash understood that Derpy might have other places to be right now, but this was urgent. She would gladly make up to the mailmare by personally going wherever it was she needed to be and take the blame for the delay.
“I seem to be stuck.”
Derpy’s explanation made Rainbow’s ears twitch. Part of her knew what had happened, but another part had to ask to make sure.
“Why?”
“I put my forelegs around you and now seem to be stuck on Pinkie’s flanks.” Derpy answered slightly confused from her odd position. Her head was now resting on halfway up Rainbow’s back and her forelegs remained glued around Pinkie’s lower area.
“Great….”
“I am covered in sugar.” Pinkie explained noticing that Rainbow Dash was currently not in the mood for any explanations.
“Why would you do that?”
“It’s a long story.” Pinkie stopped herself from telling the mailmare the entire story. “Do you think you can lick us free? It’s only sugar.”
“Enough with the licking already!” Rainbow Dash was losing her patience. “Can you somehow get us to Twilight’s castle?”
Derpy nodded or at least tried to and tightened her grip around Pinkie. Flying would be difficult but not impossible for her. Luckily the castle reasonably close and it would only take a couple of minutes. She slid a bit further back and flapped her wings with all her strength. Slowly they gained a bit of height until only Pinkie’s front hooves were still on the ground. Abruptly they dropped back to the ground as Derpy burst out laughing.
“What the… why are you laughing?” Rainbow Dash did not find the situation the least bit amusing.
“Sorry….aaaahahahaha…it’s…haha…your…tails!” Derpy kept giggling madly. The sound infected Pinkie who also giggled along. “They…haha…are…tickling my belly! Hahaha!”
“Oh, dear Celestia….” Rainbow Dash desperately wanted to facehoof as hard as possible. Hard enough to knock herself out and not have to be in this situation any longer. “Can you please try and help us somehow.”
Derpy tried pulling herself together and managed to hover enough to lift Pinkie’s back legs off the ground. Further was out of the question while being tortured and Derpy told them so between laughs.
“I think I can hop a bit.” Pinkie said and did just that.
It was a miniscule hop, just barely enough for her to leave the ground. The movement made their tails rub even more against the mailmare’s belly elicting even more laughter.
“Please, please let this work.” Rainbow sent a small prayer to whatever hopefully benevolent cosmic entities might be listening. “Let’s go….down that alleyway!”
Slowly and with a lot of laughter the trio made their way towards Twilight’s castle.
The lyrist took a quick glance over her shoulder and saw the reporters still hot on their tails. The problem now was to get rid of them again and that was going to be difficult.
Her initial plan had been to simply outrun them after a while. Judging by the labored breath of Vinyl running at Lyra’s side the chances of getting the DJ to run any faster were impossible. Her tank was already running on empty and it was only going to be a matter of time until she collapsed in the middle of the road.
Lyra tried to think of any other way to lose the reporters. A quick glance over to Vinyl momentarily halted her trail of thoughts.
“Vinyl….your face is melting.”
“My what?” Vinyl barely managed to utter those two words. By this point the only thing keeping her going was the fear of what would happen should she be caught. Making headlines this way was not something she had ever planned to do.
The generous helping of flour used by Lyra to cover up Vinyl’s beetroot red head had mixed with the sweat that had been building up. The result was a doughy substance clinging in lumps to Vinyl’s face. Her mane and tail were also nothing more than a lumpy mess in the meantime. In part her red face could be seen and the effect was rather scary. It gave Lyra an idea.
“We’ll cut through the restaurant!” Lyra altered her course to take the direct route there. “Grab a bottle of ketchup!”
Vinyl didn’t have any breath left over to object or ask why. All she could do was to try and keep up with the masked lyrist.
“It ain’t much further.” Applejack whispered to Fleur. “Jus’ down the road and then a left towards mah farm.”
“Ok.” Fleur whispered back and tried her best to not trip Applejack.
The relatively long trip had not been easy. They kept nearly tripping over Fleur’s invisible legs and had received a few very curious looks by some ponies out and about. Mercifully none of them had been reporters.
“Have you tried some kind of conditioner?” Fleur quietly. For the last fifteen minutes she had been resting her head on the farmpony’s. The thick blonde now invisible mane could have required some attention the model thought.
“Now don’t ya start too.” Applejack rolled her eyes out of reflex. “It’s bad enough Rarity keeps goin’ on about it.”
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you.” Fleur hastily apologized. “It just that your mane is lovely and I think you should maybe care for it more.”
“Ah do take care of mah mane!” Applejack found it exhausting that everypony kept thinking she didn’t care about her appearance. “If yer out on the field the entire day yer mane wouldn’t look so nice either.”
“Applejack?”
The all too familiar voice of Applebloom cut through the discussion going on.
“What happened to your mane?” Sweetie Belle chimed in.
“And what’s with the scarf?” The third voice belonged to Scootaloo.
The crusaders had been out trying to find a way of gaining their cutie marks. As predicted their efforts had been fruitless once again. Now they had been on their way back to their clubhouse and of course just had to come across Applejack trying to get Fleur to the farm.
Startled Applejack turned her head towards the voices behind her. Fleur didn’t have a chance to react properly and tripped over the farmpony’s leg. Without much style the model crashed to the floor, the scarf not being able to hold her weight.
To the crusaders it looked like Applejack had just literally lost her head and commented on it with three loud shrieks of terror.
“IT’S THE HEADLESS HORSE!” Scootaloo suddenly found herself face to invisible face of a long forgotten nightmare.
“IT’S TAKEN MY SISTER!” Applebloom shrieked with eyes wide as saucers.
“AND IT’S DECAPITATED FLEUR!” Sweetie Belle shrieked the loudest of them all.
With furious buzzing of little orange wings the trio took off. Scootaloo on her scooter had been pulling her friends along in the little red cart. Now with fear fueling her abilities all that was left was a cloud of dust as the fillies made their way back to the safety of their clubhouse.
“NO! WAIT!” Applejacks cry fell on deaf ears. “Oh, hayballs!”
“What now?” Fleur said with slight panic in her voice as she stood up again.
“After them! Quick before ponies see us!”
Applejack bolted down the street chasing the crusaders. Fleur easily kept up as they raced towards Sweet Apple Acres. Any thought about disguising themselves had been thrown out the window for now.
“I knew it!” Scoop grinned wide. Their efforts to find some clue about Fleur’s whereabouts had been fruitless. Then the shrieks of three fillies had been very clearly heard echoing along the streets of Ponyville. “They were trying to smuggle her out! Come on!”
Scoop ran towards the source of the terrified yells. Her more or less loyal photographer followed her immediately along with the few other reporters that had not been distracted by any of the diversions.
It only took them a couple of minutes to stumble across some tracks in the road. By the looks of it something on wheels had raced by and was followed by two ponies. Sensing that she was on to something Scoop decided to follow the tracks leading out of town.
Ponies nearly choked on their meals as two ponies ran through the outside area of the local restaurant.
The outfits caused a few ponies to blush and cover up any nearby foals eyes. Without a word the duo ran by. The masked pony dressed up as Mare-Do-Well snatched two tomatoes from a plate while the other scandalously dressed mare snatched a bottle of ketchup from a table. A moment later a bunch of reporters rushed by in hot pursuit of the pair.
“Quick!” Lyra led the way into the labyrinth of alleyways behind a few blocks of houses. “I have a plan!”
Vinyl obediently followed her friend. The use of her magic on top of running would sap the last bit of her pitiful remaining strength very quickly. Luckily Lyra knew that and decided they would have to end the chase now.
After a few quick turns they had put a good amount of distance between themselves and the reporters. The pair came to a sudden stop as they turned into a dead end.
“Take a swig of the ketchup!” Lyra commanded and looked around for any possible escape options if they needed any.
Vinyl didn’t have any gas left in her tank to object and did as she was told. After taking a good amount of the ketchup in her mouth she swallowed it with some difficulty.
“Now what?” Vinyl coughed once.
“Don’t swallow it!” Lyra flopped on the ground and smushed the two tomatoes she had liberated from being eaten against the top of her head. “Just take a mouthful of it in your mouth and dribble it out.”
“What?”
“Do it!” Lyra snagged the sunglasses from Vinyl’s face with a squelching sound. The doughy substance had framed the sunglasses nicely. Now it seemed as if Vinyl’s bright red eyes were sunken deeply within the sockets. “Perfect!”
Vinyl dribbled the ketchup back out of her mouth and resisted the urge to wipe her face. Lyra snagged the bottle away from her and dumped some of the ketchup on the squashed tomatoes on her head. Then she flung the bottle to the side out of sight.
“What is going on?” Vinyl didn’t follow what Lyra was planning.
“You’re a zombie!”
“Huh?”
“Don’t tell me Octavia never showed you one of her zombie movies.” Lyra heard numerous hoofsteps growing louder. “You are a zombie and have just eaten my brain. Get in character….fast!”
“What?”
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!” Lyra yelled out in mock pain and laid still on the ground.
For a brief moment everything was quiet. Then the hoofsteps grew quickly louder as the reporters homed in on the yell. All of them suddenly rounded the corner and came face to face with a scene straight from a horror movie.
Rapid Flash’s eyes nearly bulged out of her sockets as she saw the scene in front of her.
Lying on the floor was the masked pony with a large bloody mess on top of her head. Slowly the photographer cast her eyes over to the pony standing beside the seemingly dead pony. The mare in the raunchy outfit seemed slightly lost for the moment, but it went unnoticed by the reporters. All they could see for the moment was the mare’s bloody mouth. Blood red eyes stared wide eyed at the shock-frozen paparazzi.
“Uh…” The voice was raspy and sounded slightly confused. “Brains?”
Dirt Sheet suddenly jabbed his hoof into Rapid Flash’s side causing her to jump in terror.
“Pictures! Quick!” He ordered her while also slowly moving backwards towards the exit.
With jittering hooves Rapid Flash readied her camera and took a blurry picture of the scene in front of her. A few other photographers followed her lead. Then the mare in front of them took a step forwards. A collective gasp went through the reporters as they froze in place again.
“Brrraaaaaaiiiiinnnnssss….” Vinyl had trouble talking. The running had made her throat hurt and her voice was even more raspy than usual. She took another step forwards and watched with some amount of relief that the gullible reporters were genuinely freaked out by her appearance. “Tiiiinyyy diiirttyyyy brrraaaaiiiiinnnsssss….”
The mare suddenly jumped towards them. The reporters yelled out in terror and turned around to flee the scene while taking a few pictures as long as they could.
“What was that?” Rapid Flash asked after they had left the maze of alleyways and were back on one of the main roads through Ponyville.
“That was out story!” Dirt Sheet didn’t stop and kept running towards the train station.
“What about Fleur?” The pegasus ran alongside her partner and looked back only to see the other paparazzi following them.
“Forget her for the time being!” Dirt Sheet had his hooves on some gold right now and he would have to work fast to publish it before his competitors. “We’ll come back for her later.”
Only once they were sure to be alone did they both let out a sigh of relief.
“Nice work, Spanky.” Lyra said as she got up from the ground and removed her now soiled mask.
“Don’t ever call me that again.” Vinyl growled and sat down on her flank. The DJ was thankful for finally having a moments rest.
Her legs hurt and she really could do with something to drink to quench her thirst. It slightly annoyed her that Lyra seemed to still be full of energy and not even breathing very heavily. Vinyl decided that it had been enough exercise for one day, or week, or month…no…enough exercise for the rest of the year for her. The rest of the year would be spent lying on the couch and not moving unless absolutely necessary.
“That should have given Fleur enough time to get away I reckon.” Lyra began stripping out of the rest of her costume. After a moment Vinyl decided it was time to shed her current garments as well.
“Ahem.”
Both mares jumped at the sudden sound. Standing only a few paces away was Spooky Noodles. Instead of taking a picture he just gave each mare a rather creepy smile.
“I just want to say that I am impressed at what you just pulled off.” Spooky Noodles slowly trotted towards the surprised duo. “If you feel like getting together to….discuss….it in some more detail, here’s my address.”
The grubby stallion slid a equally grubby looking piece of paper over to them with his address written in barely readable letters. Neither Vinyl nor Lyra were to keen to even touch it.
“Yeah….that won’t happen.” Lyra just stared at the stallion and shook her head.
“Why not?” Spooky Noodles gave them a slimy grin.
“Well…” Lyra bit her tongue to not tell him to stick the paper where the sun doesn’t shine. He knew who they were and that might lead to problems along the way. Lyra chose to take the more diplomatic route instead. “You see we are both comfy on our side of the stable….if you know what I mean.”
“No problem.” The stallions grin turned even slimier. “I don’t mind just watching.”
He turned around and left the two mares staring after him. A few seconds later Lyra picked up the piece of paper with her magic ripping it into small pieces and scattering them on the ground.
“I need a shower.” Vinyl said after removing the last pieces of clothing she had been wearing.
“I think I need one now too.” Lyra shook her head to rid her memory of the strange stallion. “But I think we should head back to the castle first. See if Twilight has come up with anything useful.”
Vinyl grunted in response. Lyra gave the DJ a quick look once over and hid her grin. The flour covering her had turned into a beige dough apart from the places where Vinyl had been wearing the risqué outfit. It was fairly obvious that the DJ had been wearing a very interesting set of garments and Lyra was curious to see the effect it would have on the others.
“That’s too far.” Vinyl got up on all of her hooves with some effort. “Let’s go to Rarity’s instead. Tavi and Bon Bon are there and I don’t think Rarity would mind if I used her shower.”
“We can sneak through these back alleys.” Lyra agreed after a moment of thought. “Ok then. Let’s go.”
“Can you carry me?” Vinyl wasn’t too keen on going anywhere on hoof.
“We’ll walk slowly.” Lyra replied as she took their costumes in her magical grasp and bunched them up into a nice little ball.
“Stop! STOP!” Rainbow Dash yelled out in a futile effort to avoid the immediate accident.
Her pleading fell on deaf ears. Pinkie had joined the constant involuntary laughing from Derpy and kept giggling along very much to the annoyance of Rainbow Dash. The copious amounts of hairspray had given up the battle to keep Pinkie’s hair down causing her mane and tail to revert back to their poofy appearance. The result was that Derpy’s belly was being tickled even more. With tears in her eyes and short on breath the pegasus did her best to help get them towards Twilight’s castle.
It had been going rather well up until this point. Using a few narrow back alleys they had managed to avoid being seen despite the constant laughter. And it was here at the end of the alleyway that their progress would be halted.
A pony appeared at the end. Curious about the laughter the mare with the light blue coat and distinct colors of her mane had stopped to see what was going on. She then had frozen at the sight of three clumped together ponies approaching her very fast.
“Move!” Rainbow Dash’s order was ignored or overheard by the mare.
Pinkie Pie had used her front hooves to hop along to the best of her ability. Summoning all her strength she hopped as high as possible to try and avoid the pony in her way. It was barely enough to clear the back of the mare. With a thump she landed with her forelegs resting on the mare’s back. Derpy felt her efforts being halted for the moment and gladly gave her wings a rest, but kept chuckling from being tickled.
“Do you mind?” Colgate asked in a sharp tone addressing Pinkie Pie.
“Great….just pony-flipping great….” Rainbow Dash murmured more to herself.
“I don’t mind at all.” Pinkie happily replied.
“I meant would you please get off my back?”
“I can’t do that, silly.” Pinkie giggled.
“Why?” Colgate turned to the grey pegasus. “And why are you laughing?”
“I can’t help it…” Derpy burst out laughing again.
“We are stuck on you.” Pinkie answered.
“Stuck? What? Why? How?” Colgate turned her attention back to Pinkie Pie.
“Because I am coated in sugar and am now stuck to your back.” Pinkie happily explained. “Just like Rainbow and Ditzy are stuck to me.”
“WHAT!?” Colgate scrunched up her face in disgust. “SUGAR?!”
“Oh great…” Rainbow Dash knew what was about to happen.
“I just spent the entire day trying to fix the damage done by sugar and now you tell me that you are stuck to me with that infernal stuff!” Ponyville’s resident dentist was about to go into a rant. “Today I had six patients with massive….”
“Give it a rest Colgate!” Rainbow Dash wasn’t in the mood for hearing any kind of rant right now.
“My name is Minuette!” The mare didn’t really mind being called by her nickname when her mood was good. After more than ten hours fixing pony’s dental problems her mood was not classifiable as good. “Sugar is evil! I have been saying constantly, but none of you ever listen!”
“Fine, fine, FINE!” Rainbow Dash raised her voice until Colgate went silent and just glared at the pegasus. “Do you have any water with you?”
“No.”
“Then you are stuck here with us and the next possible option for us to get free is in Twilight’s castle!” Rainbow Dash snapped at the dentist. “Get moving!”
“Excuse me?” Colgate had no intentions to move anywhere but home. “There is bound to be somepony close by that can help us.”
“Yeah, that’ll look good won’t it?” Having no control over her limbs to force Colgate to move Rainbow had to resort to verbal methods instead. “Ponyville’s dentist stuck here thanks to sugar.”
It didn’t take long for Colgate to see how it would look to others. She would no doubt never hear the end of it if word got out of her sudden predicament.
“Where were you planning to go?” Colgate finally asked with a sigh of defeat.
“Like I said!” Rainbow’s patience had run out long ago. Evident in the way she snapped her answer to the dentist. “The castle! Move!”
Colgate managed to crabwalk her way towards their destination while Derpy did her best to keep Pinkie’s back hooves off the ground and still laughing uncontrollably.
Applejack silently cursed as she tore down the street leading out of Ponyville together with Fleur.
They didn’t have any hopes of catching up to the fleeing crusaders. The fillies had been spooked and it had given Scootaloo a boost in her already impressive speed on her scooter. The fact that she had been pulling a cart with Sweetie Belle and Applebloom inside didn’t seem to pose any kind of problem for the pegasus.
The trio couldn’t been seen anymore, but they most certainly could be heard. No doubt a lot of ponies had heard them and would possibly come investigate. Applejack thought about hiding Fleur first someplace on the farm, but decided to risk taking her along to the crusaders clubhouse to show the fillies that there was nothing to be afraid of.
The orange farmpony cast a look over to the model running at her side. The sight of only Fleur’s head bobbing along next to her was something that would no doubt come and haunt her in her dreams one day. Fleur seemed to be able to keep Applejack’s pace without any trouble so the farmpony sped up a bit more. No doubt the crusaders would be at their clubhouse by now.
Scootaloo put on the brakes suddenly as they had finally reached their destination.
Applebloom and Sweetie Belle held on tightly and barely managed to not be propelled from the cart. Without pausing even for an instant the fillies jumped from the cart and ran after Scootaloo who already was halfway up the ramp to the clubhouse.
The little pegasus dashed inside and waited just long enough for the other two fillies to enter before slamming the door shut and barely avoiding hitting the flank of Sweetie Belle with the door.
“What do we do now?” Applebloom asked and quickly shut the windows. “Why didn’t we go to the farm?”
“Applejack is the headless horse!” Scootaloo looked around for something to keep the front door locked. “She might have already been there!”
“Did you see what she did to Fleur?” Sweetie Belle curled up into a ball and wished her parents or Rarity were here to help them fend off the evil lurking outside somewhere. “Perhaps she did the same to the others!”
“Then we need ta get to the farmhouse!” Applebloom tried to stop Scootaloo from barricading the door with a chair. “Maybe they need our help!”
“Or maybe they are in on it!” Scootaloo barely managed to keep the stronger earthpony away from the door. “Perhaps Big Mac or Granny Smith is the Pony of Shadows!”
“Ah might have noticed that, don’t ya think?” Applebloom answered back and advanced towards the door.
“Well you didn’t notice Applejack being the headless horse did you?” Scootaloo’s retort stopped her friend in her tracks.
Applebloom had to admit that she had not seen her sister suddenly change into a decapitating monster of nightmares. She wisely decided to join Sweetie Belle in cowering on the floor instead of going back outside. Scootaloo just stared at the pair for a moment.
“What are you doing?”
“Waiting for help?” Applebloom answered the pegasus’ question.
“Rarity will come and help us. I am sure of that.” Sweetie Belle nodded quickly to reaffirm her hopes of her big sister coming to their rescue.
“What if she can’t?” Scootaloo paced around in front of the pair. “Perhaps that’s where AJ got to Fleur!”
“Oh no!” Sweetie Belle started whimpering quietly.
“We need to defend ourselves!” Scootaloo suggested and found an ally for her idea in Applebloom.
“You are right.” The farmfilly looked about the rather chaotic clubhouse. “But with what?”
That was a good question and had already been asked in Scootaloo’s mind. She looked around and decided that assaulting the monster with an assortment of various Rainbow Dash-themed fan-made object would not work. Then she found a possible solution piled in the corner of the room.
“The grape juice!”
“Really?” Applebloom sat up and gave her friend a skeptical look. “Grape juice? What’s that supposed to do?”
“Perhaps it doesn’t like grape juice.” Scootaloo had already formed a plan and now only had to convince her friend to go along with it. “Or maybe we can blind it by filling up some balloons with it and throwing them at it.”
“But it doesn’t have any eyes. How are we supposed ta blind it?”
“I..uh…hmmm.” Scootaloo had to admit that Applebloom’s objection was a good one.
“Maybe it really likes grape juice and will rather eat it than us?” Sweetie Belle stopped her whimpering sounds to contribute to their defense plans.
“Yeah! That!” Scootaloo nodded feverishly.
“Well…we got plenty of balloons and juice…that’s fer sure.” Applebloom eyed the large piles of glasses filled to the brim with grape juice.
It had been another unsuccessful attempt at earning a cutie mark. That time they had tried their hooves at juice making. Apart from large quantities of said juice that unfortunately was unfit for consumption and various stains in their coats of varying degrees of stubbornness to be removed the efforts had been futile. Together with a lot of balloons they had been given by Pinkie Pie they now had an option to make some kind of defensive weapon.
Without much hesitation they began filling up the balloons with juice.
Spike carefully set down another pile of books beside Twilight. The Princess had been going through every available book covering law, privacy and freedom of press to find some method of keeping them away from Fleur. Apart from a headache forming in her left temple she had come up with nothing useful.
“No.” Twilight closed the book she had been reading and rubbed her temple with her hoof. “There are plenty of cases about court decisions about privacy, but none on them in combination with the press and public places.”
Twilight had to slowly come to the realization that her library was lacking in the field of law and order. She would have to order more books on the subject once this entire business was over.
“Pass me the next one and please see if we have anything on those topics in the latest shipment from Princess Celestia.”
Spike wordlessly passed her another book and then promptly made his way towards one of the many storage rooms in the castle.
Ever since the old Ponyville Library had been destroyed they had received shipments from Princess Celestia in order to replace any of the lost books. As they had more space here than in the previous Library the shipments kept coming much to the annoyance of Spike who had to always catalogue the new arrivals and file them away according to a system that was currently Twilight’s system of choice and was subject to change any moment. Re-shelving day was slowly becoming his least favorite day of the entire year.
A rather loud knock on the front door interrupted Twilight’s reading.
“Spike?” Twilight called to her assistant, but the dragon could not hear her way back in one of the storage room and half inside a large wooden box.
With a grunt Twilight got up and trotted towards the front door. The banging intensified her beginning headache and she quickly opened the door to give whoever it was a piece of her mind. Anything actually going on in her mind came to a sudden stop as she studied the strange creature in her doorway.
“Hiya Twilight!”
“Sugar is eeeevvviiiiillll!”
“Aaahaha…heeelp mee…ha ha ha.”
“Where is Spike?”
“I want to go home!”
Twilight stretched her neck to locate the fifth voice coming from the bundle of ponies in front of her. She saw a little filly stuck to Pinkie Pie’s belly with her back. By the looks of it the filly was known as Sunny Daze.
“What happened to you?” Twilight asked and regretted doing so as all of them spoke at once. The Princess held up a hoof to stem the tide of answers. “Just one of you please.”
“Spike!” Rainbow Dash snarled her answer.
“Spike?” Twilight looked from on pony to the other hoping to find some kind of sensible answer.
“Where is he?” Rainbow Dash tried looking past Twilight, which wasn’t easy as she only couldn’t move anything but her eyes.
As if on cue the dragon appeared from a room to the left carrying a pile of books. He promptly dropped them as he saw the strange apparition standing in the doorway.
“There!” Rainbow Dash spied him from the corner of her eye. “Go get him Colgate!”
“I’ll do no such thing!” Colgate replied sharply and turned to Twilight. “Could you please just get us out of this mess now?”
“I..uhm…what?” Twilight was still confused at what was going on.
“Spike accidentally switched the flour with powdered sugar.” Pinkie explained with a smile. “Now we are in a sticky situation.”
“No puns!” Rainbow Dash wasn’t in the mood for such things.
“HA! So it worked!” Spike gleefully rubbed his hand together. “Serves you right!”
“What? Spike?” Twilight turned around to her assistant in disbelief. “You did this on purpose?”
“Why you little…” Rainbow Dash desperately tried thrashing about to free herself, but only succeeded in angrily flicking her ears. In the process she glued one of them to Pinkie’s temple.
“Why would you do that?” Twilight couldn’t believe that Spike had pulled that prank.
“Let’s just call it payback for those specially flavored rubies you had given to me last week.” Spike answered with a grin.
“You gave him those rubies?” Twilight turned her attention back to Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie. Both of them looking surprised and slightly sheepish at the same time. “Do you know what they did to him?”
“It was just a little prank.” Rainbow Dash defended herself. She had managed to flavor a few rubies thanks to Pinkie Pie’s help. “He’s a dragon. He can handle a few extra spicy rubies.”
“They gave him gas!” Twilight now was giving the pair a very angry look.
“So what?” Rainbow would have loved to shrug. “Just open the window.”
“You don’t understand.” Twilight grabbed the bunched up ponies in her magic and levitated them inside and finally closed the front door. “When a dragon has gas it is expelled by burping.”
The bunched up ponies just gave Twilight a blank stare.
“You remember what happens when Spike burps?”
“He makes a green flame?” Pinkie Pie guessed joyfully. She loved guessing games despite their current state.
“And what does that flame do?” Twilight asked and set the ponies back down.
“Smell bad?” Pinkie guessed again.
“Apart from that it also sends things to Princess Celestia.” Twilight could see that neither Rainbow or Pinkie were following her. “Spike had sent half of our books, a lot of furniture and various breakfast related stuff to her by the time we had his burping under control again. Princess Celestia was less than amused!”
The last part was a guess on Twilight’s part. The Princess in Canterlot had not replied to the sudden assault of various books, chairs, tables, plates and cutlery along with a stack of food with anything else apart from a note which read: “The pancakes were tasty.”
“Yes, that’s all fascinating but could we please get unstuck now?” Colgate couldn’t care less about pranks being pulled by any of them right then and there.
“Spike…get the hose.” Twilight kept glaring at Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie. “Do you have anything to say? If not then the water will be cold.”
“We’re sorry.” Rainbow and Pinkie said in unison.
“So we are even?” Spike asked returning with a hose in his hand.
“Yeah, we are even.” Rainbow mentally added a “for now” to her answer.
“Just out of curiosity….where did the foal come from?” Twilight asked and began hooking up the hose to the faucet in the kitchen with her magic.
“I just wanted to get past them!” Sunny Daze answered as only she actually knew the answer. “I thought it would be faster to just tunnel under Pinkie, but Derpy’s sudden laughter made me jump when I was right under her and then I was stuck.”
“It’s because of the sugar!” Colgate felt the need to chime in. “Take this as a lesson to stay as far away from sugar as possible, Sunny!”
Spike rushed off to fetch a couple of towels while Twilight carefully used her magic to free Sunny Daze first.
