• Published 2nd Oct 2014
  • 1,997 Views, 114 Comments

Rainbow's Mind Controlling Guitar - Windlife



Almost at random, Rainbow Dash learns she can control other people's minds with her amazing guitar playing skills! She surly won't abuse the power.... much. No haters please. I've had enough of them.

  • ...
166
 114
 1,997

Mind Your Time!

Rainbow Dash hit another sting on her guitar. She really liked the sound it maked so she hit it again, and again. Pinkie Pie came into the room they were now both in.

“Wowy! I really like the sound of that!” she said very happily.

“Thank you, Pinkie, I like it too.” she hit it again and all of the rest of the mane 6 came in the music room they were now all in.

The purple one, named Twilight opened her mouth. “Guy’s there are some guys attacking each other in the hall we have to help them.”

Apple Jack, who had orange skin, runs out into the hall where she sees to boy’s fighting each other. “Stop it ah’ you two!” she yell at them, but they punched each other so hard that it drew blood. Things were getting worse by the time Twilight stepped in.

Twilight steps in but it was very hard to stop them because she has no magic right now. She tried getting between the two but it didn't help, they really wanted to hurt each other. Rainbow Dash plays her guitar and it stops them from hurting each other.

“Wowyyyyyy! Pinkie said. “It’s like you can control people with that guitar!”

Rainbow Dash smiled. She was very happy to learn this. From a young age she always wanted to control others, and make them do what she wanted. And the boys outside did what she wanted, when she wanted.

She moved her hand, strumming the instrument once again. She tried her best to hide her excitement from the rest of the group, but it came through in all its glory. A broad smile slipped its way onto her face as she looked at the boys.

Their once normal eyes beamed a soft blue, calmly lighting the area around them like internal flashlights before disappearing once they trailed to far from their hosts. Rainbow could tell that they were empty on the outside. Nothing more than lifeless husks, with their only purpose in life to listen and obey. For a split second, she wondered if their minds still sheltered their real thoughts, like a lost puppy no one would listen to. She imagined them bashing against themselves, demanding to be let out of their new eternal hell.

Shacking her head, Rainbow thought, No, I'm not about to let morality get in the way of my fun...

“Get the drums!”

One of the boy goes to get the drum set from inside and begins to play it a lot. He was very good and he liked to do it.

“You!” said Rainbow dash to the other boy. “I want you to get the base gutar and play it with me.”

They played a lot that day. And the boys were very tired of playing, so she let them go.

_________

Rainbow Dash wake up to a bright day in her school. She was very much wanting to do another day of controlling people. She went outside to the cafeteria and began to play. Soon everyone was under her control.

Twilight ran up to Rainbow Dash. “You need to stop, this is not right!”

“I will stop when I have the world!” Rainbow Dash was very crazy, as she had a bad look in her eyes; she was very insane.

Twilight was heartbroken to see her friend act this way like a crazy person. She began to back way, but Rainbow pointed the gutar at her. She was very scared.

As she backed away, but a big portal opened up behind her and she got pulled through by a pony who was pink, had pink hair, and had hooves.

“Are you okay?” it asked her like it was wanting to know.

“Twilight freaked out because this was the first time she has ever seen a pony. She didn't want to die because she heard they eat people.

“Get away from me!!!” Twilight yelled while pushing the pony away. But the pink pony held her down to keep her safe because she didn't want Twilight to hurt herself.

“It’s okay I know how to stop, Rainbow Dash!” pink pony said.

“You do?”

“Yes, look through the portal!”

Twilight looked through the portal to see all the humans working on a big building for Rainbow Dash. (Think Sponge Bob movie) She was very crazy as she played the gutar to get everyone working all the time. Twilight started to cry as she saw Apple Jack pulling a cart full of stone to keep up the construction of the building for Rainbow Dash.

“How do we stop her?” Twilight wiped her face off of her tears and stood up, because pink pony let go of her.

“My name is Pinkie Pie, and all we have to do is get the gutar away from her!”

“Really?” Twilight was suppressed to know it was that easy. (She didn't think it would be.)

It was like the time when she fought Deamon Bash (My OC), it was very hard, but she did it.

“Okay” she said. “Lets go”

They both went into the portal and into the other side to face Rainbow Dash. They had weapons like M16, and AK47.

“Stop!” Rainbow dash said. “I will beat you with my powers!”

Rainbow played her gutar and Twilight almost joined her side but she didn't because Pinkie Pie helped her with magic. Rainbow Dash punched at them but it didn't work, they were saved by magic again.

“What is this stuff that always saves you from me attacking you with my rad music?”

“It is magic!” said Twilight with a grin because she was winning.

Rainbow dash ordered her slaves to attack, but the didn't because Pinke Pie saved them with magic. It was a long battle after that, but in the end Apple Jack came back from being mind controlled and she was very mad so she hit Rainbow Dash.

“How does it feel Ah’ big ol’ meany?”

Rarity come over and slapped Rainbow Dash in the head. “I don’t like what you did to me, Darling.”

Rainbow dash was very hurt to see all of her friends looking mad at her and she was very sad to see Fluttershy crying. Maybe I went too far? She thinks as all the other humans go back to their days because they forgot everything.

“I just wanted to live out my dream…”

Twilight smiled. “It’s okay RD. We forgive you!”

“Really!?”

“Yes” all the friends say in all at once.

Pinkie Pie went back to her world after waving goodbye to all the humans. Everyone waved back to her, even the other Pinike, who was pink also, and had hair like her as well (But this one doesn't know that it is her but human). She thought that they kinda looked like her friends, but she just shrug it off.

“No big deal!” And she skip away.

Author's Note:

I hope you liked it! I worked all week on it!

Comments ( 114 )
Windlife #1 · Oct 2nd, 2014 · · 11 ·

No adding to any troll groups.

Critique

Comment posted by The Guardian and Friends deleted Oct 2nd, 2014

5088112
Again, please stop trolling.

Looking for editors.

Comment posted by The Guardian and Friends deleted Oct 2nd, 2014

5088119
Stop talking like you know things.

Comment posted by The Guardian and Friends deleted Oct 2nd, 2014

5088129
Sure, buddy. Go back home now, you're not very good at being "smart".

5088134

Go back home now, you're not very good at being "smart"

Says the person who deletes comments to "block the haters"

5088138
*Pats on head* You keep trying to be smart. I'll be over here laughing at you.

Windlife? I hate to say it, but if you say don't add to any troll groups, the troll groups will come for you. If you ask that they add to troll groups? It might have a slightly better result in your favor. Don't talk about troll groups at all? Bingo.

5088141

I've done nothing to indicate I was trying to be "smart". Simply that you're a fucking idiot.

Let the hate rain down on you like the plagues of egypt.

5088145
*Pats on head* You tried.

5088151

"tried"? Dude, if you get rid of the "DONT HATE ON MAI STORY" warning, this would have just faded into obscurity

5088157
Hush now, for your time has not come.

Comment posted by The Guardian and Friends deleted Oct 2nd, 2014
Comment posted by Windlife deleted Oct 2nd, 2014

5088178
Fuck off.

Comment posted by The Guardian and Friends deleted Oct 2nd, 2014

5088185
Seems fair to me. Two apples for the price of one? That's a good deal.

Comment posted by The Guardian and Friends deleted Oct 2nd, 2014
Comment posted by The Guardian and Friends deleted Oct 2nd, 2014
Comment posted by The Guardian and Friends deleted Oct 2nd, 2014

Don't worry everyone, Guardian and Babs has nothing good to say. Please enjoy the story!

another brilliant story, i new i not mad3 a mstak folloing u

but it seems STOOPD PPL still kep being hatrez

kep going duud, ignor te hait

Comment posted by The Guardian and Friends deleted Oct 2nd, 2014
Comment posted by The Guardian and Friends deleted Oct 2nd, 2014

5088111
Don't troll. Last warning.

Comment posted by The Guardian and Friends deleted Oct 2nd, 2014

5088229 Wanna fight about it, m8!?
Fookin' bash ur 'ead, swer on me mum. :eeyup:

5088241
And people say I'm rude. Wow, please leave me alone, you hater.

5088142 I'm pretty sure that it's goal.

Comment posted by The Guardian and Friends deleted Oct 2nd, 2014

Negative comment.

5088262
Thank, God. Please never come back!:facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof:

Comment posted by The Guardian and Friends deleted Oct 2nd, 2014

5088268
Thank you for learning your lesson.

5088271

And yet you never learned yours to not delete comments, or mass hate will be spewed on you.

5088241
5088138 UM EXCUSE ME SEE THE THING AT THE DESCRIPTION TELLING U TO "NO HATERS"???????!!!

5088276
Haters are a necessary part of being an author. They teach you to be better by criticizing you, and they get you ready for the harsh real world of writing aside from online fiction writing. To say not to hate is like to say "I don't want to improve"

5088312 tl;dr

2word4me u must be stoopid al de hters r rlly meen to rlly good ritr kk thxbi

She really liked the sound it maked so she hit it again, and again. Pinkie Pie came into the room they were now both in.

I've only read the first paragraph and I'm confused. Why does she like the sound specifically? Does it bring up an old memory? Is it just catchy? If you're going to make the character like something, at least give the reader a reason as to why she likes it. I'm sure you wouldn't have just added it in if there wasn't something significant about it. Or maybe I'm just being optimistic. Anyways, here's a better example:

Rainbow Dash truly adored the sound of her fine-tuned guitar. Particularly, the delicate amalgamation of strings she'd mistakenly stumbled upon one day in practice, fashioning a rather catchy tune. Rainbow Dash unconsciously strummed the melody as her buoyant companion Pinkie Pie bounced into the room.

Again, the reason your scene is sub-par as there's literally no description or detail put into it, it's just there.

Twilight steps in but it was very hard to stop them because she has no magic right now. She tried getting between the two but it didn't help, they really wanted to hurt each other. Rainbow Dash plays her guitar and it stops them from hurting each other.

You're not even trying, are you?

It was like the time when she fought Deamon Bash (My OC), it was very hard, but she did it.

Nice troll fic. Enjoy your dislike.

Comment posted by TheTrueDragoon deleted Oct 2nd, 2014
Login or register to comment