“Oh can I guess who she is before we get there? Please, please, please, please,” begged Rarity as they traveled through time, passing a strange carriage with a young stallion driving and an older stallion beside him yelling something about eighty-eight miles per hour. Rarity was starting to get more and more excited to see the mare who won her little Spikey-wikey's heart.
“Sure, knock yourself out,” said Discord as he rolled his eyes. He was starting to really rethink the idea of helping her.
“Ok is it…..Applejack?” asked Rarity with the image of Spike trying to kiss her still in her head. The image strangely caused Rarity to feel a small pain in her heart that she could not identify.
“No,” answered Discord blatantly, causing the pain in Rarity’s heart to go away for a bit.
“Fluttershy?” asked Rarity, as the pain returned stronger.
“No.”
“Pinkie Pie?” the pain returned once more.
"No."
"Uh, Twilight?" Discord quickly put a paw to his mouth to keep himself from puking at the thought of Spike dating his sister.
"NO!"
"Rainbow Dash?" The pain returned yet again.
“No,” said Discord in an irritated tone. “How blind is she? She will probably go through every mare in Equestria until she finds out it's her,” thought Discord, but sadly he was right; Rarity had gone through every mare she could think of by the time they reached their destination, Golden Oaks Library.
“Discord why are we here again?” asked Rarity as she looked around the library. The only ones there were Twilight, who was re-shelving the library again, and Spike, who was polishing his Fire Ruby.
Discord face palmed and shook his head in despair. “Just watch the door,” said Discord as he pointed to the door, and just as she turned her head; Rarity saw the pony in question and was shocked to see who it was.
“ME!?” yelled Rarity seeing her past self. “I… Uh… Bwuah?” She started to faint due to shock, but Discord quickly grabbed her.
“Oh no you don’t, you are not fainting on me,” said Discord as he stood her back up.
“But it’s me! I would have never guessed it,” said Rarity, causing Discord to face palm once more, but this one was so hard that somewhere a star went supernova.
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU NEVER GUESSED IT WAS YOU!?” screeched Discord at the utter stupidity he was hearing. He started to turn red from his tail to the tips of his horns and he had to resist the urge to rip his goatee off and burn it, “Who have I been wasting my time with showing these things to?”
“I thought you were…” said Rarity before Discord interrupted her.
“No! Do not speak! You will probably say something that will give me a migraine,” said Discord. “I have been wasting enough of my time doing this anyway. I’m really starting to think it’s not worth it anymore.”
“Whatever do you mean? What is not worth it?” asked Rarity cautiously.
“Never mind what I mean. That is classified, top secret, no nosey ponies allowed,” said Discord as he changed into an overcoat and slipped a large brown envelope inside the coat. “Besides we are here for you, not me. Do you remember what happened here?”
“Yes, this is the day Spike generously gave me my precious Fire Ruby,” answered Rarity as she placed her hoof on her neck where the ruby would sit.
“Given to you, or was it taken by you?” asked Discord with an accusing tone and a stern expression.
“I did not steal it from him! Watch! He gave it to me willingly,” pointed Rarity to her past self and Spike.
“You really like it huh?” said Spike as he looked at the ruby and then at Rarity.
“Like it? It's magnificent,” answered past Rarity as she batted her eyes at him. Spike was conflicted about giving it to her. His stomach wanted to eat the gem while his heart wanted to please Rarity, but in the end his heart won the battle.
“Then you should have it. This beautiful gem was meant to be with you,” said Spike as he placed the ruby in her hoof.
Rarity was taken back by his act of kindness. “I don't know what to say... This is so thoughtful. Oh, my little Spikey Wikey!” said past Rarity as she kissed him on the cheek, causing him to pass out.
“See, he gave it to me willingly,” said Rarity, proud to be proven right.
“Oh really, is that what you think?” asked Discord sarcastically, Rarity nodded her head in response. He then conjured up a remote control and pressed the rewind button. “Let try this again,” said Discord as he cast his mind reading spell on both Spike and Rarity.
“I really want to eat this, but look at her. She just too beautiful to resist,” thought Spike with hearts in his eyes.
“I. Want. It.” thought past Rarity with the ruby being the only thing she could think about.
“Typical, you were greedier then he was when he went on that little rampage,” said Discord.
“He gave it to me willingly! Everypony knows he did,” protested Rarity in anger.
“Really?” asked Discord as he snapped his talons and took them to the day of Spike’s birthday party. He then focused his mind reading spell on everyone in the room as past Rarity showed off her new Fire Ruby and cape.
“Cheap move Rarity, stealing his birthday gift,” thought Rainbow Dash.
“That no good varmint, she scammed him right outta it,” thought Applejack.
“Poor Spike, giving his gem away to her. Oh I hope I can find him a new one,” thought Fluttershy.
“Rarity that was a meanie pants thing to... Hang on, itchy tongue, dry throat, and rumbly tummy? Discord, stop listening to my thoughts! Oh but before you go, please, please make it rain chocolate milk,” thought Pinkie Pie, somehow able to know that Discord was listening to her thoughts.
“Did I really take it from him?” asked Rarity quietly in disbelief.
“I don’t know, but it doesn't matter. Spike made you happy and that’s all he could ever ask for,” said Discord. “You know when he was turned into a full grown dragon, a tiny part of him was still thinking of you.”
“Really?”
“Yes, why else do you think he foalnapped you when he was on his rampage?” asked Discord as he transported them back into Spike’s brain and to the cabinet marked ‘Rarity’. Discord opened the cabinet and quickly found what he was looking for and showed Rarity what he had found. It was an image of Spike as a full grown dragon lying in a cave with all the stuff he had collected off to the side, but Rarity was the only thing he held close to himself.
“Was this what he was going to do if he had reached the top of that mountain, horded me instead of this stuff?” asked Rarity as she studied the image.
“Yes, and he would have protected you from anypony that dared to come near you,” said Discord as he teleported them inside the image. They now saw Spike sleeping while holding Rarity gently in his claws, and piles of charred pony skeletons at the entrance of the cave, but there was one particular pile that caught Rarity’s attention. A pile of skeletons made up of two alicorns, a unicorn, two pegasi, and two earth ponies.
“But why me? Out of all the mares in Equestria, why am I the one he likes?”
“What are you disgusted by the idea of him being in love with you?” asked Discord sternly in an accusing manner.
“No never!” said Rarity, flabbergasted at the accusation. “I am flattered, truly I am, but I am also quite curious to know when he started to like me,” said Rarity. Hearing this was the last straw for Discord as a tiny expanding mushroom cloud appeared over his head. After all his efforts it seemed that Rarity had learned nothing, absolutely nothing.
“Ok, that it I am done,” said Discord in an irritated tone as he brought Rarity back to her file. “I have been trying to get you to see that he loves you and when I finally do, you start to question when it all started!?” yelled Discord as he started to become infuriated once more. “If you can't see how he feels with my help, then maybe you be better off figuring it out on your own.”
“What do you mean? You're just going to leave me here?!” asked Rarity in a mixture of anger, shock, and fear.
“Yes, I can, I will, and I’m just about to. So here’s the list of places to go and here is the mind reading and time spell,” said Discord as he handed the scrolls to Rarity. “I will be back in a couple of hours. Please do try to figure this out while I am gone,” said Discord before he disappeared, leaving Rarity alone and confused.
“Ha-ha. Discord very clever, now come on out,” said Rarity thinking it was just another one of Discord’s pranks, but Discord did not respond. “Discord, come out this instant!” ordered Rarity, but still no answer. “Oh dear...” said Rarity as the reality of the situation finally sank in.
“How can one pony be that blind, it’s impossible!” thought Discord as he traveled to his next destination. “Of all the ponies to choose from, I just had to pick her,” moaned Discord, “If I had known it would be this hard I would have picked somepony else. Well at least this next pony should be easier to deal with,” Discord finally reached his destination and saw the pony he was talking about, a bald middle aged earth pony stallion with a red coat and black and gray tail with a black hole in his chest, standing in a white void.
Discord quickly changed into a unicorn form, wearing a solid white robe, and approached the confused stallion extending his hoof to shake his.
“Welcome, Jean-luc. You're dead,” said Discord with a straight face.
“D!?” said Jean-luc, surprised to see him.
If I was Discord, I would've just given Luna the bits and let it be.
I assume you mean 'disgusted'.
5018396 yes I did thanks for pointing that out.
Oh, Rarity, how could you have not seen it? And Discord even he has his limits when dealing with other obliviousness.
I think you put the wrong letter there... or not, after looking back, it is really unclear whether or not it should be a 'D' instead of a 'Q'...
~Crystalline Electrostatic~
5018418 No I meant it to be D.
5018423 Just wanted to make sure, it was a tad unclear...
Either way, thanks for clearing that up.
~Crystalline Electrostatic~
Rarity wooed Spike to get the gem, it's kind of obvious. She's used to flirting with guys/stallions whatever to get what she wants. Kind of sad to cheat someone out of something on their birthday of all days.
Rarity, you big idiot. Maybe she is like one of those that would be with some pony of the same species. Just a thought.
That first paragraph:
sportreadr.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/great_scott_400.png
But man, this was almost heart-breaking. I always thought that Spike giving her the ruby was really sweet, but also kinda selfish on Rarity's side.
Wow, you know you messed up when you get Discord to rage quiet. And come Rarity, you shouldn't be this dense. No sane or insane being is this dense.
5018557 She has be oblivious of his feels for almost five seasons. I am pretty sure she could be almost this dence.
I was predicting how this story would go pretty accurately but that you started saying stuff about Queen Rarity and I remembered that I read Nightmare Rarity for the first time recently and now I can't really think of what would happen next. Nice job.
5018594 Thank you. I like to keep people guessing what going to happen next.
5018606 Wow that response was like less than a minute after. Daaaaaang.
5018621 I type very quickly. Strange because I am slow at writing.
Pinkie & The chocolate rain! eighty eight miles per hour! Juan-Luc!
PACK YOUR BAGS RARITY'S GOIN ON A GUILT TRIP!
Future Rarity? The mane six have little ones (Even spike) But Rarity only has an empty cold Boutique to come home to.
Lots of assets here! Yey!
5018630 STAHP respondin so fast man!
Your puttin us to shame.
Besides that you don't write that slow.
What's the "Queen Rarity" thing at the bottom of the episode/movie/comic list? I don't recall an episode/comic where this happened (plus, you already put Nightmare Rairty up there).
So yeah, I know absolutely nothing about Nightmare Rarity, or whatever Queen Rarity is. Care to elaborate?
I think that- at this point- a pallet of bricks has more insight than Rarity. Way to go, you're dumber than a rock.
I would have been entirely too condescending to do any of that, ever.
DISCORD FTW!
Rarity you biscuit
You know, someone really needs to check Ponyville's water supply for lead contamination. Seriously, it would explain so much.
5018702 this is something I made up.
5018726 Nightmare Rarity is when the spirit of Nightmare moon takes over Rarity, it's in the comics. Queen Rarity is something I came up with.
5018828 Of course it's in the comics...
Oh well, still lookin forward to it.
5018797
New head canon approved.
I can't believe
how stupid
and dense
Rarity is
chocolate rain!
PINKIE!!
WHAT?! Ever since he reformed he hasn't made it rain chocolate milk once.
Well, Discord abandoning Rarity explains how 'Hearts and Hooves Day' got messed up.
5018837 Ponies don't have large brains. Also just cus they have a big head doesn't mean a big brain and a big brain doesn't mean a large intelligence. Personally i think that because of how small most of their necks are that their brains don't get enough oxygen. Also they are herd animals and easily frightened.
OMG! This chapter was awesome! I think that this the first I've ever seen/read that Discord has actually been annoyed and has shown it. The part with past Pinkie talking to herself and Discord reading her thoughts was classic And for Discord to give up after all the he's done to show Rarity that she's the one Spike loves, I don't blame him one bit, Rarity.. Looking forward to see what happens next.
5018368 knowing how discord would bet I would wager there is more to it then just money.
5018418 good I am not the only one to get that joke
5019146 maybe
I so totally so this joke coming.
5018585 No he's right. No sane, intelligent being should be this dense. I applaud you sir. You have officially created the densest being I have ever seen
5019727
He, with a little help from his editor (#nobrag)
A few things that got cut from production
now that I think about it, i can see why this got cut... Its cause I don't know how to write Twilight
Oforf, Rarity... I've met dogs with more insight than you.
5019837 it's not that I just cut that becauseTwilight was in the same room when spike gave her the ruby and she could have stopped him, but desided not to.
5019727 I feel like I might have to create a new word for dense now.
5018824 Oooooohhhhh COOOOOOLLLL!!!!! CAN'T WAIT!!!
5020108
Yes, and that word is Rarity...I mean, seriously, I'm clueless. I'd need a clue-by-4 upside the head for most if not all things that pertain to subtle. Thing is...SPIKE WAS ANYTHING BUT SUBTLE!!!! Seriously, the fact this Mare continues even now to be so clueless frankly scares the shit outta me and makes this pairing seem almost doomed...albeit in a funny way.
I'll stay tuned, as much as it hurts I've never bailed on Spike in the past and I'll not start now. Best of luck to Best Dragon, and here's hoping his love will grow into the Mare he deserves by the end of this.
5018879 fc09.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2011/260/4/8/mlp__chocolate_rain_by_arbok_x-d4a5v03.jpg
Not that I'm complaining about the content, but it just occurred to me to ask if there's any reason you are making us hate on Rarity so much?
5020637 No, That going to stop in the next couple of Chapters.
5021644 Still though, it does seem as though you are painting her in a really bad light. Is it just for the sake of plot and nothing else?
5021799 I like to think of it as she is both blind to Spike's feelings and her own feelings towards him, like how she acted to Moondancer.
Oh, I see what you did there, in the beginning, Back to the Future xD
It's strange to think Spike would kill the rest of the mane 6 to "protect" Rarity... I just... Don't like this idea...
5022245
Well to be honest his mental compacity would have been serously lacking, and i doubt he would even still remember who the others were if that growth spurt changed something in his brain. concidering that we now see exactly how much Spike loves Rarity in this case because he still recognized who she was even though he did recognize the others.