I'm a short, auburn, gothic Pegasister! ^-^
Twilight has been locked up in her library for weeks. The tree is in a state of disrepair and no word has been heard from either Twilight or Spike. Her friends are worried sick and Twilight's refusal to come outside have only left them curious to why she remains in her antisocial state. What's wrong with Twilight?
Page generated in 0.194 seconds
Total duration
902 users online
725,589 hits today, 2,921,617 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
4256222 Thanks a bunch!
Not a bad story, I liked your writing style and the way you did dialogue, howeer the plot was a bit... Unclear. You should try and have a bit more action in the ending then a battle noone can see (Unless that was your point for some weird reason) all in all, the whole thing was a bit... Anti-Climactic, but otherwise great to read.
Interesting, but three things don't make sense to me.
1. If Twilight was out of contact for weeks, pressumably waiting for rescue, why didn't she starve to death.
2. Why did she never respond when her friends came over? Also, why didn't she seek their help? Why wait for them to arrive days or weeks later?
3. If Spike was eaten by something down there, why hadn't he been digested yet? He should have at least suffocated, we're talking about many many days here.
Yep, the orphaned outcast who's life is so lonely that he had to unofficially adopt you guys as family - and hasn't been seen in just as long - is nothing but a fucking afterthought.
And a mere three sentences later they're back to focusing their concern exclusively on Twilight. This is one of the most unlikeable versions of the mane six I've ever come across. I almost wish I could step into the story and bludgeon them all.
The hell you have.
Well...I guess it was entertaining. Except for the parts with ponies in them.
4256772
4257322
4257655
Thank you guys for the feedback! I'll certainly take it all into consideration when I write my next story!
This wasn't too bad of a read, actually. Certainly interesting, but I couldn't really pinpoint the genre, to be honest.
A good fic, nonetheless.
4257655 I can understand some comedy in a review, but that was a bit harsh.
4378768 Putting up with Spike's secondhand treatment for as long as most Spike fans have will breed such harshness. I have nothing against the author.
4382416 Okie Doki Loki!
Have a like, I will see how this goes
4411950 Whoops. I forgot to put the "completed" status on the story. It's supposed to be a cute little oneshot.
4411972 whelp, it's good. Keep goin!
That coverart.
It's the Bunyip.
4446101 See, SOMEONE gets it! /)
That was the creepiest thing ah ever heard.
(jk) This was good. I didn't know what to expect, but the outcome was good!
Very good. :)
I Don't get the ending?
Okay, lemme see if I got this right:
There's a monster in their basement.
It sooner or later ate Spike.
Twilight spent weeks trying to find a way to kill the creature and rescue Spike.
I honestly don't understand any of this. If anyone could explain what happened, please do.
But at least Spike's okay.