- Member Since 23rd Jul, 2012
- offline last seen May 6th, 2021
BumpyWish
A life growing in pony's belly is the most lovely thing in the world.
BumpyWish
Joined 23rd Jul, 2012 ·
Offline
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I've got the keys, now let me iiiiiin
The subject matter is definitely unf-worthy, but yeah, the language is rather difficult. I'll try combing through this chapter later on to see if I can straighten it out for you.
4527319 Aww, you are too kind. I believe I can still improve.
4523717 Thank you so much for helping! ^w^
Please, continue. I find this...
savepic.org/5320456.png
...fascinating.
Let you know if there are any grammatical errors? Um...where do I begin?
Unfortunately, they're everywhere. Every corner of the story has them. But you're new to English, right?
4532142
I would say, for his level, it was pretty decent. However, the people who know English like I do perform at a FAR higher quality than this. Though, beauty sits in the eye of the beholder, I suppose.
4684158 Not really new but still unfamiliar with it. Maybe you can point out some errors that appear frequently?
Can we expect to see Glisten or Blue Drip?
4714259 Of course.
4716860 Mind=blown
Brilliant.
Simply brilliant.
About 65%-75% of the sentences of the first chapter were full of mistakes. Mainly minor ones though. Either missing a word or two or having the correct words but in the wrong order.
The second chapter was much better. I was rooting for you the whole way. I only see a few mistakes so far (crosses fingers). "'Name Roseluck'" No! It is suppose to be "My name is Roseluck." So close. Only about 50% of the second chapter had mistakes and most of it is located in the dialogue.
From chapter one to chapter two, it's a massive improvement. I know it will become even more concise in the next chapter.
Best of luck, stay healthy, and update soon!
-Sky66
4738968 Thanks! That's really helpful.
Much confuse.
English isnt my first language too!
The only reason my mistakes dont show is because I
dontcant type that much.Maaaybe switch 'her' with 'she'?
3/10 for grammar.
For example...
In my English*.
If you found any grammar errors (should actually only be 'If you found any errors'.)
5425620 Thanks for correcting me, I'll keep it in mind. :)
5426694 UPDATE plzzz
4708889 I LOVE INVADER ZIM AND I LOVE GRR
You asked for this.
When referring to fetishes, you often don't use present tense, instead of 'pregnant' put 'pregnancy'
You're only referring to this one story. 'stories' is plural, instead of 'stories' put 'story'
The second line is a bit trickier, there are probably other ways you could word it depending on what you are trying to say, but I'm just going to show you how I would word it from my interpretation.
Full correction:
Try this instead:
Incorrect word for the context, should be 'symbiotes'
Bonus authors note! Yay!
it's = it is, which refers to a single object, should be 'this is the'
'I wrote the' does not make sense. Should be 'I have written a'
Full correction:
5868362 Totally worth it. Thank you so much. XD
You got 4 sketches. Send me a private mail and let me know what would you like.
5868800
Yeah. Funny thing about that. I read your blog post and saw that it said you'd give something back in return, but somehow didn't see the part about sketches.
So, I don't know. Honestly I did this just because I read you were asking. Wow. Now I feel bad. Um...
Yeah I got nothing.
5869210 You mean an example of sketch?
i.imgur.com/OEqHVdtm.png
Don't worry. Though I might be a little insane here... Promise is a promise. I will measure my ability after first few comments. XD
5870900 cdn.overclock.net/2/28/287d2b5d_1298305804533_MOAR_LOLZ-s450x516-143512-580.jpeg
Here goes...
To look at her belly and the folks in Ponyville? Nope. And think this spot here needs a comma not a period. Here's what I think you meant:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
It would be 30 minutes? Nope. Punctuation errors, I think one? I'll let you choose between these two since both would be grammatically correct, about one or two hours, or only one or two hours. You using a too complicated word, use words that mean the same, but are commonly used:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
She is Blue Drip? Nope. Just my acquaintance? That's missing a few words or you used a wrong word... or both:
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Name Fluttershy? Definitely NOPE. Nice to meet you too? Nope. Hoping? Stick with what you started with, this is present tense not past tense:
Please continue
Please update
Please continue this is great
No more chapters?