Fallout: Equestria - Towards the Light

by Meeting of the Minds

Chapter One: Leavin' Home

Fallout: Equestria - Towards the Light
All was quiet around Stable 60 in the early hours of the morning. The ponies on night shift had all gone back to their rooms, and the ponies replacing them were already at their stations for their shift. The rest were either sleeping, or about their morning business.
One of the stable’s security ponies, with a coat of snow white, was casually trotting down the corridors of the residential area, whistling along to a happy tune on the stable radio. He continued to travel down the corridors, taking the occasional turn, until he reached the door of his friend Silver Streak, the stable’s hairdresser and one of the two remaining griffons in Stable 60. When he reached the door, he flipped the radio on his PipBuck to off, and knocked firmly on the door three times.

With a huff, Silver marched over to one of his room doors, yawning furiously. Hitting the switch, he let the door slide open with a hiss. Outside was his friend, Arctic Frost, Deputy Commander of the stable’s security forces.

"Good morning, Arctic, how are you this morning.” Silver grumbled, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. It'd been a long night last night, and it showed - His eyes had bags, dipping underneath them.

“I’m very good this morning, thank you!” Arctic replied cheerfully bouncing a little on his hooves. “And how are you my friend?”

“I’m quite well, just fairly tired.” He said, joining Arctic in the hall. “I was up late last night with Cogswheel, if you catch my drift.” A smirk drew upon his face, deviously. Silver was the kind of griffon who used his charm (or at least tried) to worm and squirm his way out of situations with mares.

“I believe I do. I took Gears home after my shift last night. We were up late as well.” He said, beginning to walk toward the atrium, Silver in tow. “But anyways, I have the day off, so I figured we could go hit the bar, have a few drinks, see where the day takes us.”

“I wouldn't mind a drink, or having a night like last night to be honest.” Silver said, walking alongside Arctic as they ascended the stairs to the atrium.

“I’m not opposed to the idea either.” Arctic said as they followed the signs for the bar through the winding corridors of the stable. As they approached the bar, they noticed it was full of ponies that had just gotten off the morning shift. They walked in, taking a seat at the lengthy bar. Both of the friends grabbed a bottle of vodka and looked at each other in the eye. Arctic narrowed his eyes as he popped the top on his bottle, Silver doing the same for his.

“On three?” Arctic asked, to which Silver replied with a nod. “Alright, one… two…Three! Bottoms up!” Arctic shouted as both of them began to chug their respective bottles. Arctic had a slight lead, until the burning became too much for the pony to bear, and he removed his lips from the bottle and coughed a few times before continuing to drain the contents.

“Hah, ya chickenwuss!” The griffon exclaimed, slamming his bottle onto the table. “Still can’t beat me!”

“At least I got close this time.” Arctic grumbled, throwing his bottle into the trash chute, listening to the satisfying shattering sound when the bottle hit the bottom.

The two friends exchanged idle chatter for a few minutes, talking about the usual stable things. Mostly mares. That was what the duo normally discussed.

“Want to play some darts?” Arctic asked taking a sip of a glass of whiskey he had acquired.

“Darts? You should now me by now, I’m the king of darts in the stable.” He smirked. “You won’t win.”

“Yeah, but darts impress the fillies.” Arctic said, motioning over to a group of giggling drunken mares.

“Who’s got first shot then?” Silver asked, grabbing three darts. Arctic walked up and grabbed the other three before joining Silver at the line.

“You go first, I’m doing some sightseeing.” Arctic said, watching some dancing filly’s flanks shake around.

“Whatever.” Silver said, throwing his three darts. He hit a sixty, twenty and a fifty. “A hundred points! Top that buddy!”

“Well, at least we know who failed kindergarten.” Arctic scoffed, throwing his three darts. He hit thirty, twenty and fifty. “That’s a hundred. You got a hundred and twenty, dumbass!”

Silver grunted and retrieved his darts from the board. “I’m still winning colt-cuddler, so shut your mouth.” He threw the darts a second time, hitting two sixties, and a twenty one.

“Come on, one time that happened! I’m surprised it hasn’t happened to you yet.” Arctic said, throwing his second round of darts. He was able to hit two sixties and a forty, just one measly point short of a tie. “Damnit!” Arctic yelled. “One point, that’s it! I’m getting close to beating you ‘King’” Arctic said, using air quotes with his hooves when he said king.

“But you didn’t, so you’re still a loser.” Silver taunted as they walked back to the bar. They both got another bottle of vodka each.
“Whatever, the game still had the desired effect; there was a small crowd of nice looking fillies watching our game.” He said, motioning to a group of mares, who looked away when he pointed at them. “So, should we go for the usual, or try to round up as many as possible and make a party out of it?”

“I think I’d enjoy that, but we’ll be waking up pretty sore in the morning.” Silver said, standing up and chugging the rest of the bottle of vodka. He walked over to the group of mares in the corner of the room. Arctic got up and went to engage the four mares that were sitting at a table near the dartboards.

Both of the boys were talking to the fillies for a long while, but eventually, Arctic stood up and walked over to Silver and tapped the griffon on the shoulder. The griffon excused himself and the two friends went to the bar to talk.

“So, how’s it going for you?” Arctic slurred, the extra drinks he had at the table with the mares starting to take its toll. “Those four are ready to go back with us, how about your four?”

“Yeah, they said they would. We’re going to have fun tonight!” He cheered.

“Yeah we are! Tonight is going to be legendary. We can even share with Gordie and Double, if they aren’t too busy being depressing or something.” Arctic said, finishing a glass of whiskey. He flipped a few switches on his Pipbuck and whistled. “It says they are right down the hall.”

“Well then, let’s go! Maybe we’ll run into them on the way out!” Silver said, getting up and returning to the table the mares were at. Arctic returned to his respective table as well, and the group of ponies exited the bar, and headed for the living quarters.

Unknowingly, they passed the two people they were looking for, the Pegasus and griffon entering the bar as they exited. They continued walking toward Arctic’s room, making small talk and laughing the whole way down.

When they arrived at Arctic’s room, he unlocked the door with his Pipbuck, and ushered the fillies in. “After you ladies.” He said, motioning into the small apartment with a hoof. He stopped Silver in the doorway as the mares headed for the bedroom. “This is going to be great!” He said excitedly to his friend.

“We’re going to need some ice for our pelvises tomorrow!” Silver said. The two friends laughed as Arctic closed the door and they headed for the bedroom.

---

“Celestia damnit!” Double Tap yelled as he rapidly tapped the buttons on his terminal. He was fiddling with the stable’s control systems, which were crashing for the ninth time in the past month. Eventually, he was able to fix the malfunction, but there was still more work to do. There was always more work to do. After a few more hours of futilely trying to fix the stable’s mainframe software, Double sighed in frustration, giving up for the day. He needed to talk to a friend before the stress made him explode.

He walked down the narrow and brightly lit corridors of maintenance to the wider halls of the main corridors. He followed the signs for the stable clinic, resolving to go talk to the medical officer and his friend, Gordon Cloudhopper. Gordon was one of two griffons in Stable 60, the other being Silver Streak. Double walked into the clinic just as Gordon was finishing up his daily inventory check. He knocked on the griffon’s door, and Gordon stood up and walked over to the door, and opening it with the push of the release button.
Double stormed into the office and began to rant angrily. “Stupid fucking overstallion, that dumb ass won’t allow me to change the software that’s keeping all of us alive! It’s like he wants to kill us all!” He yelled, pacing around the office.

“Ahem.” Gordon cleared his throat, catching the attention of the seething Double Tap. “So, stressed out about work again? Come sit down and I’ll help you out, alright?”

“Thanks Gordon, I don’t know what I’d do without you to calm me down.” Double said, taking a deep breath and sitting down. “Do you want to check my vitals again?” He asked, holding out his hoof to the doctor.

“Yes, let’s check that out.” Gordon said, pressing two talons into Double’s fetlock, feeling his pulse. Elevated, but still within normal levels. “So, what has you worked up?”

“It’s the Celestia-damned Overstallion! I asked him if I could simply re-code the software, but no! Everything has to stay the way it is or Celestia forbid the damn world is going to end again!” Double ranted again, reverting to his seething, angry state. “I can fix it, but no, it’s better to ignore it! The system has crashed nine fucking times this month! In one month!”

“Shh… Relax. Getting this stressed out about it won’t help.” Gordon said, patting him on the shoulder gently. Just take some time and relax. Trust me; it will do you a lot of good.”

“Haven’t you observed the governing system in this place?” Double asked in a calmer, more relaxed tone. “It is a dictatorship. Sometimes, I feel like I should just upload a virus onto his personal terminal and pump it full of porn!” He said, his tone steadily getting angrier.

“Double, there is no reason to do that, and there never will be.” Gordon said firmly, shaking his head. “I know you hate him, but we need him to protect us. So just relax.”

“I know I shouldn’t, but I really want to.” Double said, leaning back in his chair. He sighed and motioned to the ceiling. “Have you ever wondered what’s out there Gordon?” Double asked, staring at the ceiling.

This made the golden bird think for a few minutes in silence...Then, he finally replied. “Sometimes I try to imagine what’s out there, but I feel like all that’s out there is death and destruction. I think it would be best if we just stayed here.”

Double sighed, and then perked up a little. “Are you done with all of your work? I heard Arctic took the day off, so we both know he and Silver went down to the bar.”

“I believe I am done working. Would you like to go down there and try to find them?”

“Yeah, sure. What game do you think they are playing? Remember how they are obsessed with mares?” Double asks, opening the door to the clinic and stepping into the hallway with the griffon.

“Of course I do.” Gordon said, rolling his eyes. “Silver is a known horn dog, but he is part wolf after all, so I’m not surprised.”

“Well, let’s go find them. They’re probably playing darts. That was their go to game to impress the drunken fillies.”

“Sometimes I think we are the only sane ones in this stable.” Gordon said, walking along beside Double.

“Anypony is sane compared to them. Maybe we are even more insane then them, considering we hang out with them.

“Well, it could always be worse.” Gordon said, sighing. “We could be friends with immature mares. The last one I had to work with was so bad. Going on and on about her money.”

“Let me guess, Trophy Wife?” Double asked, and rolled his eyes. “The overstallion needs to keep her on a leash. She tried to seduce me. It’s like she wants to get ponies thrown in jail. We’re just lucky she hasn't gone after Arctic or Silver yet.”

“What she lacks in intelligence, she makes up for in her body.” Gordon said dreamily.

“So, you want to mess with those two?” Double asked.

“Who, Arctic and Silver?” Gordon asked, snapping out of his little trance.

“Duh.” Double said.

“Sure, I’m up for it.” Gordon hesitantly replied. Uh-oh...Another plan of Double's, this could only end so well. Last time they did a scheme like this, the two griffons had ended up paying out the Overseer in their own money.

“Well, you know how every mare seems to have a thing for the griffons? Well, I say we use your charm and sensitivity that the mares love, and my good looks and intelligence to steal mares from them.”

“Alright, I’m in, let’s go!” Gordon said, uncharacteristically excitedly. They both walked into the bar, not noticing Silver and Arctic leave while they were talking.

“So, the goal is to make them think that we can pick up mares better than them at any given moment. I call this 'Shock Plan T'."

“You have alphabetized plans now?” A brow was raised, followed by a curious stare.

“Oh yeah, this is the first one I’ve ever gotten to use though.” He said, looking around for those victim on his mind - The deputy guard and the hairdresser.

“You are a strange one Double Tap, but I’ll go along with it.” Gordon looked at his PipBuck noticing that two familiar markers were leaving the bar.

“I can’t find them anywhere.”

“They just left with a group of mares.” Gordon said, looking to Double. “Still want to try to find some cute fillies to rub in their face?”

“Of course! Pick any one you want. We’ll show them that it’s quality over quantity.” Double Tap said walking over to the yoga instructor Feel Good. He begins to chat with her. Meanwhile, Gordon decided to talk with Aqua Cura, the water technician for the stable.

After a few hours in the bar, Double Tap was sufficiently drunk, while Gordon kept himself sober.

“Hey Gordon, you thinking what I’m thinking? What am I saying, of course you are. Trophy Wife is here.” He slurred, pointing at the slender yellow mare.

“Trophy Wife? Are you sure we should go for it?” Gordon asked tentatively.

“Dare we lose this chance?” Double asked, still slurring from his drunken stupor.

“I see your point, let’s go for it.” Gordon said his mind still worrying about the consequences.

Double walked up to Trophy Wife with the confidence only a drunk could have. He gives her a few drinks, chats with her and cracks a few jokes, before leading her back to Gordon. “Ready for the night of our lives?” He asked the griffon as they walked by, moving toward the exit of the bar.

“As I’ll ever be…” Gordon sighed, standing up and following Double and the three mares. 'Oh, dear...This is not going to end well.

“We are going to stop by Arctic’s room so we can brag real quickly before going to my spare room in the maintenance area.” Double said as they made their way toward the residential portion of the stable.

----------------------------------------------------------------

Arctic left the bedroom a few hours later, making his way to the small fridge in his room. He removed a small bottle of water and began to drink it as he sat at a small table in his living area. There were still creaks and moans coming from the bedroom, as Silver and one of the mares were still going at it. The rest had fallen asleep after a few hours of rigorous intercourse. He tapped the table lightly and kept drinking the water, when there was a knock at the door.

Arctic stood up and walked to the door. He flipped the switch and clicked the release and the door hissed open. He saw Double and Gordon standing there.

“Hey guys! Want to join the party!?” Arctic shouted, still drunk. He then looked past them at Trophy Wife, and his expression turned sour. “Not her, get her out of here.” He said sternly.

Double and Gordon both looked at the mare, to see if she would say anything. When she didn’t, they both breathed a sigh of relief.
Just then, a stallion wearing a black suit walked up behind them. The overstallion.

“Sir!” Arctic said, shooting to attention. Silver had just walked out of the back room, giving the overstallion an unpleasant view of the sleeping mares, some still in… compromising positions. Silver just stood there awkwardly, observing the group at the door silently.
‘Fuck you guys.’ Arctic mouthed to Gordon and Double, glaring intensely at them.

“What is going on here?” The overstallion asked, surprisingly calmly.

“Sir, Silver Streak and I were having some time alone with a few mares on my day off.” Arctic said in his official tone.

“And you felt it necessary to involve my wife?” The overstallion asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Negative sir. Your wife was not involved in our conduct in any way.” Arctic said, still at attention, still swaying a little from the alcohol running through his blood.

“I was sick and tired of my friends here,” Double motioned to Silver and Arctic. “Teasing me about not getting any mares, so I proved them wrong.”

“So you took my wife?”

“I don’t know what you are talking about.” Faking cluelessness, Double did. But it didn't help their situation one bit.

“What the fuck do you mean you don’t know!?” The overstallion screamed at Double.

“Idiots…” Silver muttered from behind them.

“Do you want to be imprisoned? How about banished? Or executed, huh?” He screamed at Double. The mares in the doorway ran when he began screaming, running down the corridors as fast as their legs would take them.

“N-no, please don’t!” Gordon said, cowering away from the furious stallion.

"Wait!" Double starts to concoct a plan, "I just figured out that bug that has been plaguing our systems. You wouldn't have this place running without me. If I fix it, do they get let off?"

“Double, you are making it worse.”

“I don’t care about the systems! They have been running this place for almost two hundred years! There is no problem!”

“Please… s-stop yelling.” .

“Shut up you useless fucking bird!” The overstallion screamed at the timid griffon. “Commander Frost, arrest this pony for treason.”

“...Please don’t hurt me.” He'd cowered back further..

“Double please go quietly, for all of our sake.” Arctic asked, walking up to him with a pair of cuffs.

“Arctic, this is my chance…” Double said, backing away from him.

“Chance for what, getting us all banished, or killed?”

"No! To set us free! Do you not see the dictatorship this bastard has set up?! Do you not notice what he is doing?!” Double screamed back. “You have three choices, Step down, let everypony die or let me fix the stable and let me leave.” Double hissed at the Overstallion.

Gordon looked at his friend, a shocked expression crossing his face. “You can’t be serious Double!”

“I’m as serious as a heart attack, a very, very deadly heart attack.” Double said, narrowing his eyes at the Overstallion.

“Double, I can’t let you do this! You’re putting all of the lives in this stable at risk! If you leave or get locked up, the stable would go into disrepair and we would all die!” Arctic yelled, moving for the ten millimeter pistol sitting on the counter. He grabbed it with a hoof and popped the bit into his mouth, aiming at Double’s head.

“We’re all going to die anyways! This bastard won’t let me fix the stable systems! We have a few weeks before the systems fail and we have flooding, power loss and radiation leaks! We’ll be dead within the month! Ask the Overstallion, he knows, and he wants to leave it be, let us all die.” Double said, moving a hoof toward a pocket on his jumpsuit.

“Is that true sir?” Arctic asked around the weapon in his mouth. He kept the weapon aimed at Double, but glared at the Overstallion.

“Of course not… He’s lying!” The Overstallion said with a slightly nervous hesitation.

Silver chuckled at the overstallion, sensing his nervousness. “Is that nervousness I hear in your voice, overstallion?” Silver said, earning a tentative step back from the overstallion, before he opened his mouth and returned to screaming.

“Do you want to get kicked out of the stable too?! I have no reservation kicking your snarky ass out to your death with these two!” The overstallion yelled, his face beginning to turn red as he yelled even more.

Double whipped out a small red button from the pocket on his jumpsuit. “If you get any closer, I press this and we all die!” He yelled, backing into the hallway. The overstallion kept moving toward them, cornering them against the wall of the corridor. He was now directly between Arctic and his two friends.

Arctic, meanwhile, was facing inner turmoil. Does he believe his friend, and help him get the systems fixed? Or, does he believe his commanding officer and kill his friend. He shook his head, closing his eyes and sighing. “I hate you guys, so much right now.” Arctic said, pointing the pistol at the back of the overstallion’s head, pulling the trigger with his mouth. The ten millimeter round slammed into the back of his head, causing his head to explode all over Gordon and Double.

Gordon’s reaction to this was immediate, while Double just froze up.

“Ahh!” Gordon screamed, stumbling back into the wall. “Oh, what the hell?!” Covered in blood...Oh, Gordon thought this was disgusting!

Double dropped the button, looking over to Arctic, who had just dropped the pistol. “I knew you would do the right thing Arctic.” Double said, wiping the blood off of his face.

“Gordie, you alright there buddy?” Silver asked the golden-feathered griffon, who was currently freaking out in the hallway.

“All of you shut the fuck up now.” Arctic hissed coldly. “Go to your rooms, places of work wherever you need, and grab everything you may need. We are leaving the stable in an hour.” Arctic said, walking to the counter in his small room and grabbing a photograph of his family before walking out of the room, presumably to the armory. The other three were just standing there, looking down at the dead body that was lying in the middle of the hallway.

“Gordie?” Silver asked, the other griffon, who had become completely unresponsive looking at the headless corpse. When Silver spoke, Gordon immediately scampered off to collect his things and grab some medical supplies. The other two followed suit. Silver went to the hairdresser’s, where he grabbed a switchblade, and to his room where he grabbed another knife and a bat.

Double, however, made his way directly to the overstallion’s office. Once there, he hacked into the overstallion’s computer, and searched for the software files. Once he found them, he downloaded the corrected codes from his PipBuck. He briefly considered downloading the pornbomb, realizing that no pony could stop him. He went back down to his room, after the file was downloaded, where he grabbed a storage extension to his Pipbuck, and a photo.

The two griffons and pegasus all arrived at the main entrance, waiting on the security officer to come and meet them, before they left the stable. Gordon was completely silent. The mood in the group of friends was quite somber, as they all realized what this meant. Their lives would never be the same. They would be walking out into uncertainty, never knowing when they might die.

“I guess this is it. This is what it has come to.” Silver said, looking up at Double Tap.

“So it has, Silver, so it has.”

Arctic, while his friends were waiting in silence, was walking to the armory. He was taking his time, thinking about all he threw away. In the end, it was worth it. He was saving the lives of hundreds of innocent ponies that the overstallion was going to let die.
Arctic walked up to the armory door, and used the code on his PipBuck to open the door. He walked inside slowly, looking around the room one last time. He walked over to the weapon rack, grabbing his battle rifle. He had nicknamed it Scrapper, and it had been modified to be fired from the hooves like a zebra rifle. He also grabbed three ten millimeter sub-machine guns and enough ammo to last them a few days in the unknown wastes above. Finally, he grabbed a small bag that was full of miscellaneous hoof machined parts for a fifty caliber sniper rifle. Arctic walked to the riot lockers, which had never been used. The only time they were ever opened was when a new recruit’s riot armor was put in the locker of a retired member. Arctic popped the lock to his locker, and put on the suit of heavy riot armor. The black armor encased his entire torso up to his flanks, and had leg guards which slightly hindered movement, but were protective enough that he wanted to take them. He also put on the re-breather, which was used when they needed to use tear gas, but could be used against almost all gasses and under water.

Arctic walked out of the armory, and to the overstallion’s office. He turned on the stable PA system and took the mask off of his muzzle. And spoke softly into the microphone. “Attention all stable-dwellers, this is Deputy Commander of stable security Arctic Frost. There has been a major emergency outside the stable, and the ventilation systems have failed. I am leaving the stable to fix the issue. I will not be returning, as I care about all of you and do not want to expose you to the contagions outside the stable. I have enjoyed my time with all of you, but this is necessary.” Arctic choked back a sob and turned the PA off. He walked slowly to the entrance of the stable, tears still welling in his eyes.

After the PA message had concluded, the three friends sitting in the entryway looked between each other again. Silver looks over to Gordon, who had been completely silent since the incident.

“Are you alright, Gordon? You’ve been awfully quiet.” Silver asked his friend, who just looked down to the floor.

Arctic walked into the entryway, a stern look on his face. He had sat outside the door crying for the last few minutes. He walked up to his friends, pulling out the SMGs and handing them to his friends. He also distributed the ammunition amongst the group. He also handed out a few loaves of bread he had acquired on his walk over.

“Alright, listen to me. I am the only one of us here with combat experience and weapons training. I trust you have basic enough knowledge to know how to use a mouth-fired weapon. It may be fickle for you, Gordon and Silver, seeing as you have beaks, so I recommend using your paws.” Arctic said, as he began to type the emergency door release code into the door control panel. “You will all follow my orders, and I will be sure to get you somewhere you can live out your days in safety. However, go against me and jeopardize the safety of the group, I will not hesitate to kill you myself. Is that understood?”

The three friends nodded in silently and Arctic tapped the final button, and the door began to open. The yellow caution lights began spinning and the alarm began to buzz.

“So this is it! Into the new world!” Double called excitedly.

Arctic turned around and looked at his friends, a somber expression on his face. “This is your last chance guys. I am the only one who has to leave. There is no reason to leave your lives behind for this.”

“No turning back now.” Silver said, cocking his SMG.

“And lose my best bud? Never.” Double said, fluttering his wings.

“I’m loyal to you all, and you wouldn't last an hour without medical support.” Gordon said, still sounding distant.
Arctic smiled under his mask, and turned around to face the open door. All that was visible through the entrance was a pitch black tunnel. “Alright, follow me and stick close. We are going into the unknown.” Arctic said, walking into the darkness. The griffons and pegasus followed suit, and the stable door hissed closed behind them. Closing this chapter of their lives, and beginning a new one.

//Footnote - LEVEL UP!
Silver - Quick Learner - Well, look at you, learning quick from all the situations you've seen so far. +5% bonus whenever you earn experience.
Gordon - Stallion's Colt - Being the daddy's bird all your life, you're deep into medical pursuits. You gain a +5 Bonus in Science and Medicine.
Double - Lady Killer - Literally. Grants a 10% damage bonus to females and unique dialogue options when dealing with the opposite sex.
Arctic - Gun Nut - Seems your obsessing over firearms has given you a +5 Bonus in Repair and Guns.

Group Perk - Fearsome Foursome - Strength is always better in numbers. +5% damage bonus when fighting together in a group, but -5% when you're all apart.

Author's Note:

This was a collaborative effort between a few of us who thought this could make for a good story. Criticism is welcome, as it lets us know where we have room to improve upon the story.

Comments

[DerpyDaringDitzyDoo]

Thanks for adding your story to the Fallout Equestria Group! Hope it helps your story get more views!

[Tetragrammaton]

First of all: griffins. Good work. I like griffins. Although it has to be quite depressing for someone/pony/thing (?) like them to be trapped inside a stable for their entire life (as if that would ever happen. Although it would be an "interesting" story, a 50 chapter story inside one stable)
Also: colored griffins. The awesomness has just been doubled.

Some of their choices, like killing the Overstallion, seem a bit...radical (damn, why is there no small RD with shades picture) and unnecessary. They could have grounded him or stage a coup against him and his dictatorship (which could be elaborated further. I don't see why he's evil at this point)
Isn't it a little bit...reckless for your characters to shoot the leader, then leave the obviously dying stable along with the stable's one technician? That doesn't seem like the right thing to do. (Which is the whole point for them shooting the Overstallion in the first place)

Perks: you could highlight the names of the character(s) who earn(s) the perk. And/or make the perk's name in italic, just to emphazise it a bit. (but tha's just my opinion.)
A bit like this: Silver - Quick Learner - Well, look at you, learning quick from all the situations you've seen so far. +5% bonus whenever you earn experience.

Grammer/Spelling: No issues for me.

You'll get a like for using griffins (which are strangly enough the two only griffins in this stable and not related to each other?)

[Meeting of the Minds]

4156116
Yeah, actually looking into the plot structure as we speak. I feel that some of the things could be changed a bit.
This is actually a collab project, and the griffons are both OCs of the other writer of this story.

[Tetragrammaton]

4156362
Just keep on writing, you two/three/etc. authors.

[Meeting of the Minds]

4156599
We plan to