not bad. the whole story could use a polishing up, but over looking the relatively minor grammatical errors, this was very good. although i'm going to admit that we had some more thorough details on the specifics of Berries stallionhood (length, width, coloring, ball size, etc), but i think that might just be me. i just always thought that it made it easier to imagine the more raunchy parts of a story.
4396126 this story looks familiar. It is almost like an OctiScratch fix that I read a while ago just after I joined the site. Very good story though but minus a few points for the very minor grammatical errors. Other than that the story was great.
Not bad...
4386245 xD
I accidentally hit publish before I was fully done, that's why there was no chapter 7
not bad. the whole story could use a polishing up, but over looking the relatively minor grammatical errors, this was very good. although i'm going to admit that we had some more thorough details on the specifics of Berries stallionhood (length, width, coloring, ball size, etc), but i think that might just be me. i just always thought that it made it easier to imagine the more raunchy parts of a story.
4396126 this story looks familiar. It is almost like an OctiScratch fix that I read a while ago just after I joined the site. Very good story though but minus a few points for the very minor grammatical errors. Other than that the story was great.