Just who Is that secret admirer that loves Fluttershy from afar?

See people? This is how you write Fluttershy; shy and nervous, but not so around her friends, and not downright afraid. She's not supposed to be scared of talking, just nervous. And around her friends she should be comfortable.

Why can people never get that right?

Aside from a wonderful Fluttershy, all around a good story, and I am immensely looking forward to this. Depending on who her secret admirer is, you may give me a new ship I can honestly say I like (Right now I only like Twidash).

I get this horrible feeling that Rarity may not be dead. It's just a thing that's been bothering me since the previous story.

Another fantastic chapter! How do you do this so consistently? As always, I am looking forward to your next installment and can't wait to see where you take it.

I noticed a couple of mistakes that are really quick to fix:

“So... What did you get out it? Did you enjoy being hurt?

Should be "What did you get out of it?"

At the end of every session, she'd look me over, ask if I was okay, and check me over for injuries herself, then she'd wrap us up in a blanket.

Sounds a bit repetitive, saying that Rarity "looked her over" and "check me over for injuries" in the same sentence.

Other than those I didn't notice any errors. I love your writing and am really excited to see what comes next!

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Probably because the show writers have this annoying habit of writing that way, utterly terrified of everything and everyone to the point of being a coward(even when she literally knows she is the only one who can help her friends- Dragonshy and Magic Duel spring to mind right away(how exactly is bailing on your friends/town when you're the only one who can do something to help Kindness?). They are ridiculously inconsistent in the way they write her(at least it feels like that to me sometimes). We'll get character development, then suddenly, back to the way she was before, as if it never happened.

Yes she's shy, and has difficulty talking to ponies she doesn't know/doesn't know well, but for some reason the show writers keep turning shy and introverted into wussy and cowardly.

I dunno, I guess it just bugs me because, that's a good part of me in a nutshell, good with my friends, but generally quiet and shy, especially around people I barely know/don't know.

4278503 lately they have been pretty damn consistent from episode to episode this season. hell she has even shouted at her friends to get their attention even.

Because what happened down there wasn't.

This sentence seems incomplete.

For a minute, I forgot which universe I was reading about and forgot that Rarity was dead. Kaidan who? Even though Zombie Rarity is impossible to be the secret admirer, since she was cremated and all, stranger things have happened. However, since the secret admirer cannot be Rarity come out of hiding after faking her own death, and if it is another one of the remaining mane six, all that is left is Applejack and Pinkie Pie (unless Twilight and Rainbow Dash are trying to get Fluttershy to join them). I, for one, hope it is Pinkie Pie. Big Macintosh would be a good choice as well. Honestly, as long as it is not some original character, like Dawn Seeker or Sky Scribbles, I will be fine with whomever it is.

KBO.

4278932 Well damn, there goes that plot twist.

Pfft, I kid.

Tomorrow I'll...

I can't wait to see who this admirer is.

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You're forgetting about Sweetie Belle. After all it wouldn't be the first fic where Sweets went after an older mare lol.

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Should I label this a clopfic or fanfic on my channel?

Do you think I should label Fractured Elements a clopfic?

Clopfics usually get more attention. So up to you Miles.

4282100 Your channel man, your choice. But if I may.

I have not listened to your entire reading of my fic, because, well, it just sounds like you're 'reading' it. I've had readings where people bring the emotions and characters alive. If you could pull that off, I'd listen much more intently.

4282109 I do try emote and voice act. But depending on my mood and energy level some readings can sound more dull then others.

“Don't.” Rainbow cut her friend off. “That's what I've been trying to get out of my head all week, because that's what I'm afraid of most. I have to stop thinking about what happened down there whenever I consider dominating her. Because what happened down there wasn't domination. BDSM, from what you just told me, is all about trust and consent. That was sexual abuse and torture.”

Truer words have never been spoken RD....