One year after the humans' victory over the titans, Princess Celestia invites Eren Jaeger and his friends from the Scouting Legion to Equestria. However, old and new enemies return to take over Equestria with the assistance of even older enemies
........What did you do with Derpy? Seriously, why are you always taking the more cheery and enjoyable characters and giving them a dark demeanor which seems really plausible for us humans? This is what I sometimes hate of your stories, you make the ponies behave way too much like a human would. It is a unique way to portrait characters I suppose, but it can really....put off? Others who are use to a fix mindset about how they see the characters of the world behave.
I'm not asking you to change it, just wanted to let you know I, and some others, think when they see this kind of character portraying. I'll just assume that you have always watched the show as a ponyfied interpretation of the human world, with the differences of culture and physics (both physical and biological) to fit into a fantasy world.
I attempted to make her a more interesting character than how the fandom almost always portrays her.
Seriously, why are you always taking the more cheery and enjoyable characters and giving them a dark demeanor which seems really plausible for us humans?
See first part of my response.
This is what I sometimes hate of your stories, you make the ponies behave way too much like a human would.
What, you mean multidimensional? Like a fully-fleshed out character? Please explain to me why any of these things is a bad thing.
It is a unique way to portrait characters I suppose, but it can really....put off? Others who are use to a fix mindset about how they see the characters of the world behave.
Describe to me this "fixed mindset."
Oh look, Derpy Hooves is eating a muffin! Good old Derpy! Look she's delivering mail, just like Derpy Hooves always would!
I'm sick and tired of seeing people in this fandom taking background characters and taking their characterization only as far as their overblown and ridiculous fan-made tropes allow them. God forbid that I try to give something else to one of them that would justify their existence as a supporting character in a story and make it *gasp* interesting.
As far as I'm concerned, to anyone who gets their panties in a bunch over me not portraying their precious Derpy Hooves merely as a muffin-eating mail-pony, which clearly hasn't gotten old at this point:
I'm not asking you to change it
Good. Because I'm not.
just wanted to let you know I, and some others, think when they see this kind of character portraying.
That's too bad. If I lose their favorite, the only loss will be their's and their's alone.
I'll just assume that you have always watched the show as a ponyfied interpretation of the human world, with the differences of culture and physics (both physical and biological) to fit into a fantasy world.
That literally makes no sense at all. Just because I give darker personalities and motives to the characters in my story, that somehow means I have a warped, twisted view of the show itself? I may have a warped, twisted mind myself, but don't for one second insinuate that my mindset is projected into how I view the show.
Part of being a writer (especially in fanfiction (which is, by default, not canon)) is expounding upon an already created world in your own creative way. It's the same kind of depravity and deviance that created things like Fallout: Equestria or Turnabout Storm (easily becoming two of the fandom's most successful and acclaimed creations). Putting a darker spin on the world of a children's show is merely a writer's way of making said world more interesting for its readers.
Is it so wrong that I can have the same liberties?
I get the same crap in my dark stories simply because I didn't make the character do one thing EXACTLY like the show because of the intense situation at hand.
(Still curious how the hell sunset got maneuver gear let alone can use it)
3983897 Hey, don't portray me as the bad guy here. I'm just one guy that has an opinion about a story and how is written. I never write to make a writer feel bad or to demand change, I only write to get my mind across. I've always been that type of guy that likes to put what they think when they read something. Normally a good story.
Hmm, now that I read what I already put down, I can say that I was brash about it. It really does sound like I'm giving a critisisim rather than just putting my mind. I guess I'm only said that because how you made Derpy sound, it felt like she would harm Eren physically, rather than just having an argument which would seem as what a character like the Derpy you're portraying would do.
So I can say an apology is in order from me. I'm just so use to one way of character portraying that when I see someone altering a character that I know about, it puts me off. This is generally why I avoid troll fics.
So please, I didn't want to sound like an asshole, all I thought I was doing was putting my personal thoughts into words. I really do like your stories, I've sticking all the way from the first arch of this series, and I have enjoyed them all the while. So again, sorry man, I'll try to think before I comment on a anything that has this kind of development.
4091395 Oh, i thought it meant something else. I thought you were going to cancel the story there for a minute, just a little misunderstanding i guess. Sorry bout that
Mmm. Felt...rushed? Don't take this the wrong way, but if you've got a proofreader, you need to fire them and get someone else. There were multiple areas where punctuation was either misplaced (not lost, but placed incorrectly) or a word that was not the correct one for the situation it was used in. I don't mean to be rude, so please don't take it that way, but this chapter needs another once-over.
Other than that, I've little negative to say (and is ultimately almost irrelevant anyway) and with you a good night. Or day, if it's day where you are. It's nice to read an author breaking the assumed mold for background characters. So are Derpy and Lyra part of a cult or something in this world?
Sasha, feeling trumped by Rarity’s logic, began to unbutton her vest, a more relaxed smile on her face. Rarity, happy for Sasha’s compliance, levitated a rolled up measuring tape from her desk.
........What did you do with Derpy? Seriously, why are you always taking the more cheery and enjoyable characters and giving them a dark demeanor which seems really plausible for us humans? This is what I sometimes hate of your stories, you make the ponies behave way too much like a human would. It is a unique way to portrait characters I suppose, but it can really....put off? Others who are use to a fix mindset about how they see the characters of the world behave.
I'm not asking you to change it, just wanted to let you know I, and some others, think when they see this kind of character portraying. I'll just assume that you have always watched the show as a ponyfied interpretation of the human world, with the differences of culture and physics (both physical and biological) to fit into a fantasy world.
3982541
I attempted to make her a more interesting character than how the fandom almost always portrays her.
See first part of my response.
What, you mean multidimensional? Like a fully-fleshed out character? Please explain to me why any of these things is a bad thing.
Describe to me this "fixed mindset."
Oh look, Derpy Hooves is eating a muffin! Good old Derpy! Look she's delivering mail, just like Derpy Hooves always would!
I'm sick and tired of seeing people in this fandom taking background characters and taking their characterization only as far as their overblown and ridiculous fan-made tropes allow them. God forbid that I try to give something else to one of them that would justify their existence as a supporting character in a story and make it *gasp* interesting.
As far as I'm concerned, to anyone who gets their panties in a bunch over me not portraying their precious Derpy Hooves merely as a muffin-eating mail-pony, which clearly hasn't gotten old at this point:
Good. Because I'm not.
That's too bad. If I lose their favorite, the only loss will be their's and their's alone.
That literally makes no sense at all. Just because I give darker personalities and motives to the characters in my story, that somehow means I have a warped, twisted view of the show itself? I may have a warped, twisted mind myself, but don't for one second insinuate that my mindset is projected into how I view the show.
Part of being a writer (especially in fanfiction (which is, by default, not canon)) is expounding upon an already created world in your own creative way. It's the same kind of depravity and deviance that created things like Fallout: Equestria or Turnabout Storm (easily becoming two of the fandom's most successful and acclaimed creations). Putting a darker spin on the world of a children's show is merely a writer's way of making said world more interesting for its readers.
Is it so wrong that I can have the same liberties?
3983599 nert.me/gifs/large_1324002917.gif
That was beautiful.
I get the same crap in my dark stories simply because I didn't make the character do one thing EXACTLY like the show because of the intense situation at hand.
(Still curious how the hell sunset got maneuver gear let alone can use it)
3983883 I know it sounds cheesy (because every bad writer has said it), but you just have to keep reading. I will explain it.
3983897 Hey, don't portray me as the bad guy here. I'm just one guy that has an opinion about a story and how is written. I never write to make a writer feel bad or to demand change, I only write to get my mind across. I've always been that type of guy that likes to put what they think when they read something. Normally a good story.
Hmm, now that I read what I already put down, I can say that I was brash about it. It really does sound like I'm giving a critisisim rather than just putting my mind. I guess I'm only said that because how you made Derpy sound, it felt like she would harm Eren physically, rather than just having an argument which would seem as what a character like the Derpy you're portraying would do.
So I can say an apology is in order from me. I'm just so use to one way of character portraying that when I see someone altering a character that I know about, it puts me off. This is generally why I avoid troll fics.
So please, I didn't want to sound like an asshole, all I thought I was doing was putting my personal thoughts into words. I really do like your stories, I've sticking all the way from the first arch of this series, and I have enjoyed them all the while. So again, sorry man, I'll try to think before I comment on a anything that has this kind of development.
Armin
Why is this story on Hiatus? It's going so great right now, it's gotten featured and in the popular list. You're on a roll here.
4091391 School.
4091395 Oh, i thought it meant something else. I thought you were going to cancel the story there for a minute, just a little misunderstanding i guess. Sorry bout that
Mmm. Felt...rushed?
Don't take this the wrong way, but if you've got a proofreader, you need to fire them and get someone else. There were multiple areas where punctuation was either misplaced (not lost, but placed incorrectly) or a word that was not the correct one for the situation it was used in.
I don't mean to be rude, so please don't take it that way, but this chapter needs another once-over.
Other than that, I've little negative to say (and is ultimately almost irrelevant anyway) and with you a good night. Or day, if it's day where you are. It's nice to read an author breaking the assumed mold for background characters. So are Derpy and Lyra part of a cult or something in this world?
Please continue with this story please
All the
i.imgur.com/9HY53al.gif