Dash flew towards the front door of Fluttershy’s cottage, charging faster the closer she got. She blasted through the door, shattering it into a million pieces, and touched down in the main room. “Fluttershy! Fluttershy! You here?” She turned her head in every direction. Fluttershy stood in the corner of the room and shook, no doubt still in shock from the explosion. Next to her was some woodland critter nopony except her knew or cared about. Dash charged towards her, pressing her face against Fluttershy's.
“Oh my... Is something wrong?” Fluttershy said.
Dash pressed her face harder. “Yes. Everything!” She detached from Fluttershy and walked from side to side in front of her. “You can’t imagine the day I’ve had. I’m talking about a day so bad it should be illegal. But it’s doesn’t matter now. Cuz I have you.” Dash faced her now only friend and smiled. “I need your help Fluttershy. I don’t really know what you can do…but I still need it.”
Fluttershy put her hoof on Dash. “Of course I’ll help you. You don’t have to ask me.” Her and Dash shared a warming smile. “What is it?”
“Alright…” Dash gulped. “But first you gotta promise me something.”
“Anything,” Fluttershy said.
Dash looked Fluttershy right in the eye. “Promise me you won’t tell anypony—I mean Twilight, Princess Celestia, Angel, the trees, whatever—what I’m about to tell you, under any circumstances. I mean even if your life was in danger and the fate of all Equestria rested on you telling what I’m about to say, you won’t.” She put her hooves of Fluttershy and shook her. “Can you promise me that?”
Fluttershy smiled. “Is that all? Don’t worry. I won’t tell a single soul. I promise.” Dash didn’t react. Her face stayed the same and she kept her hooves right where they were. Fluttershy grunted. “I have to say it don’t I?” Dash smiled and nodded. Fluttershy rolled her eyes and sighed. “Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye. Happy?”
It was now official. Dash flew up and circled around in the air. “Yes. Woohoo. You have no idea.” She pulled out and performed a bunch of gloats and poses she kept in reserve for when she eventually made captain of the Wonderbolts. Fluttershy chuckled from the theatrics. “It’s finally over. I win! You ready Fluttershy? And remember, you Pinkie promised to help me.” Fluttershy nodded. Dash took a deep breath. “The truth is-.”
The sound of approaching hoofsteps came from outside the building. “Hey there Fluttershy.”
It was Twilight. Within seconds she appeared in front of what was left of the front door, followed by dozens of animals and critters Dash could recognize from Fluttershy's picnics and such. Twilight's back was covered by a bag almost as big as she was, labeled Evidence. She smiled. It'd been a while since Dash had seen her this happy. "I...hope I'm not interrupting anything," Twilight said, looking at the wreckage.
"Well...I am sort of busy with Rainbow Dash," Fluttershy said. She embraced the pack of animals that ran to her.
Twilight gave a warm smile to Dash and turned to Flutters. "Sorry, but whatever it is you two are doing will have to wait. It's urgent."
Fluttershy ran to her. "Really? What it is?"
"It's about the investigation. I need more of your animals, if that's okay with you obviously," Twilight said. She stood tall to keep her bag from falling forward.
"Of course it's okay. But why do you need more?" Fluttershy picked up a hamster and held it in front of Twilight. It showed off its adorable little eyes. "Did they not do a good job? Because if you want me to train them some more I'm always available and-."
"Calm down." Twilight chuckled. "They're actually doing better than expected." She rubbed her nose with the hamster's. "That's why I want more of them."
"Okay, somepony help me out here." Dash scratched her mane. "Cuz I'm not getting how a bunch of hamsters can help with anything."
Twilight chuckled, "Not surprised," and turned around to her critters. "I use the critters to help find evidence I otherwise wouldn't be able to find. You'd be surprised by what a 'bunch of hamsters' can do." A rat ran into the building carrying a piece of metal covered in dirt and frosting. It was a part of Dash's remote--there was no denying it. The rat growled at Dash and showed off its teeth. Twilight took the piece of metal with her magic and put it in a plastic bad inside of her evidence bag. "Like I said. You'd be surprised."
Dash kept calm. Fluttershy had Pinkie promised her after all, the most official of all agreements. There was nothing Twilight could do to take that away from her. She still had the upper hoof.
"How is the investigation going anyway? I mean I know it's only been a few hours, but I still thought I'd ask," Fluttershy said.
"Very well." Twilight smiled with confidence. "I have more evidence than I know what to do with, and I'm only getting more. I couldn't dream of a stronger case."
"Really!?" Fluttershy and Dash screamed in unison. Fluttershy leaped forward smiling. Dash felt like screaming and looked around for the nearest object to slam her head against. The solid earth ceiling was far too soft.
"Yep," Twilight said joyously, facing Dash. "My case is so fool proof there's nothing the criminal can do now. They might as well just turn themselves in right now." She turned to Fluttershy. "It doesn't matter who helps them. Justice is coming to them no matter what."
"I'm so happy to hear that. I never could've imagined you'd do it so fast. Princess Celestia will be so happy," Fluttershy said. She turned to Dash. "You hear that? Isn't it just wonderful?"
Twilight walked towards Dash, still smiling. "Yeah Dash. You should be happier."
RD silenced the negative thoughts trying to pop out of her brain and pushed out here chest to keep up her usual appearance. She forced a smile and nodded. "Of course I'm happy. I just don't wanna get excited over nothing, that's all...When do you think you'll get them?"
"It shouldn't be long now until I make an arrest," Twilight said. Her voice dropped. "That's if the mob doesn't get to them first."
"Mob? What mob?" Dash rushed outside and faced Ponyville. Her ears dropped. "Well there goes my plans."
All of Ponyville was on the move. A horde of ponies swept through the town, with torches, pitch forks and other accessories in hoof. They went from building to building, interrogating and accusing every non-mobster in sight. Ponies on platforms gave speeches and posters with Princess Celestia's face rained from the armada of pegasi above the clouds. An effigy of a pony in a bandit outfit was paraded through the streets and beaten, burned, gouged and every other verb you can think of. A whole section of the town was even on fire.
Dash grunted. "What was the point of even coming here?" she said to herself. She looked up at the sky and sighed. "Guess I got no choice now. Only one option left."
Fluttershy walked out of the house, facing away from the carnage in front of her. "You're leaving already? But you didn't even tell me what you needed help with."
Dash readied her wings. "It's too late for help. And besides, it's only a matter of time before Rarity nukes the town or something."
Fluttershy paused. "What?"
"Have a good one." Dash flew off into the sky. Destination: Bye Bye Equestria.
I think I know how this'll end, but I won't say it here in case I'm right so as to not spoil anything.
~The lizardman's lips are sealed
Why do I get the feeling that this isn't a giant prank Celestia and the others are pulling? That leaves 2 options, 1 is that RD is dreaming, 2 is that RD is a goner.
Bye. Bye, Dash. We will not forget you.
4238070 Who said it cant be both? Luna and Celestia team up and prank people in their dreams. It's the perfect plan!
Oh dear sweet Celestia, have mercy on Dash's soul... both here and in pony heaven. Because she is so dead.
lol
Yeah, this is either a nightmare or Discord-influenced.
Everybody group-pranking Dash=Okay
Everybody willingly setting fire to part of the town=No way
I just hope we get a neat twist with the big reveal, cause if it's just "ITS A DREAM LOL" I'd be pretty disappointed with the hilarious build up.
4238098 I completely forgot about Luna
I'm guessing RD is planing to commit Sonic Rainboom suicide.
I have an idea for Rainbow Dash's punishment...put her thru the PFUDOR Torture, only have Fluffle Puff dance on her head for like 10 hours straight.
If this is not a dream, it just proves Equestria is a horrible place.
I have a feeling that this is all an elaborate prank that Celestia conned everyone into.
4238254 Pink fluffy unicorns dancing on YOUR CORPSE, pink fluffy unicorns dancing on YOUR CORPSE...
LOL it would be best if Dash just went to Celestia and told her, herself... But, Knowing her... Thats the last thing she will do....
Oh geeze... This is just... So bad LOL... I love this story so much!
I have two theories.
This is pretty much the same thing as the episode of Spongebob Squarepants where he threw the peanut at the giant clam.
OR
Everyone already knows Dash did it and is playing an elaborate counter-prank on her.
Not a big fan of theory two because I'm sick of the generic cliche reverse-psychology punishment that every author pulls off.
...This just got worst.
I'd personally like to see Dash get what she deserves, or what she expects she deserves, but the punishment is lessened to some extent because she comes forward on her own, or because, frankly, she's Rainbow Dash and Equestria needs her. Maybe Pinkie vouches for Dash when she realizes the prank was meant for her, not Celestia. I don't hope it's a counter-prank, because that's been done many times before.
No matter how convincing everypony is being right now, it doesn't change the fact that Applejack was doing her extremely guilty looking lying expression, Twilight was staring daggers at Dash, etc. Everypony is either in on this prank and will likely be compensated for damages or the extensive damage itself is some magical illusion!
The sheer amount of LULZ! xD
And people thought what Twi & Co. did to Dash during "Mysterious Mare Do Well" was bad.
So, Dash flees Equestria and runs afoul of a dragon, who eats her and she dies. Then Discord turns pure evil and kills them all. The end!
(Well, you did say it's going to get worse.)
4238338 How long do you think it would take for Dashie to g crackers if this was her punishment?
WRITE FASTER. NEED MORE.
4238846 No, that's not Dashie's. That's yours, purely for thinking of PFUDOR in these dire times.
Hmm, relying on hampsters to solve a crime... What the heck, Twilight?
Oh poor rainbow dash, anyhow another amazing chapter I can't wait for more keep up the awesome work
buh-bye Equestria, hello Neighxico!
4238629
But it can still be MUCH worse lol.
I'M GONNA JUMP!
*wings fly open on decent*
*graceful glide into convenient cage*
4238940 Why do you say that?
4238641 dash only deserves a few days in prison at best, maybe paying for the damages to the cake and cake related injuries...
THE END IS NIGH
4238882
I couldn't agree more. The suspense is just making me feel like Rainbow Dash: my ending nearing soon.
Well, I guess the idea of Celestia only trying to prank Dash is usless now... Poor Dash
4239440 Times are dire!
[youtube=BAd4ZgLnb0A]
4240234
Lol classic scene.
4240613 4240234
Seeing this clip and knowing the probable ending for the story actually made me think of the April Fools episode. Y'all know the one, right?
4238724 Yeah, this is what I'm feeling. I don't want this excellent story to just turn out exactly like Mysterious Mare-Do-Well.
I bet Luna would help Dash. She probably pranks her sister all the time.
Pinkie, you done gone too far this time. Getting all your friends, the whole town AND Princess Celestia in on your "prank to end all pranks" is just too much. Once Dash realizes what you've done, she's either gonna be super-angry with you or so relieved she'll forgive you.
4242011 It won't, I'm sure of that!
No, it'll end up going "Cupcakes" all of a sudden and when Dash is finally caught after being eaten by a hydra (and revived from being digested because... magic and stuff) she is tortured by Celestia in her basement dungeon forever.
Because Rainbow Dash is a magnet for torment.
Think this is getting out of hoof?
Me neither.
4239354
You mean losing a part of the elements of harmony, thereby leaving equestria wide open to the next epic-level threat that comes along?
4243030 That is even less desirable.
4243954 Hmm... maybe once Dash finds out it's a prank she gets so angry she cracks and murders everyone with a Nuclear Rainboom?
At any rate, if this is a prank on poor Dashie, it's clearly gone wayyyyyyyyyyy too far.
This is the sort of thing you pull on people you hate and want to drive to suicide. Like pedos.
4243588
I meant worse for Dash. It's still a long way to go until her troubles end lol.
how can this get worse?
How has no-one yet suggested that this may all be an elaborate prank by Pinkie (or did I miss that). She knows everypony, perhaps she knew of Dash's prank and set this all up waaaaaaaay in advanced in the case of prank emergencies
4243982
It's the only way out, 4244101, it's the only way...
This went where I hoped it would