King Verus,the true ruler of the locust. Has escaped the hollow after the bloody rebellion led by him left it in ruin. As it was washed away by the flooding of Jacinto. An unexpected turn of events has left him and his general badly wounded in Equestria fully armed to the teeth due to a certain deity playing a dangerous game with fate, or is it something more than that. He must be here for some reason? The reason he doesn't realize. His ultamite cause, the salvation of his planet. A cause he will make a reality even if he dies on this planet.
(A/N:This is my first fic be gentle. I would very much appreciate constructive criticism. Tips and help on poor pacing. Help with bad grammer (LOL I spelled grammar wrong) would be most appreciated as well. I wrote this because I felt as though there were not enough locust in Equestria fics. Comments are encouraged, Enjoy!)
P.S: If you found this story I-I'm so sorry
hmm this could be good continue
In your brief description you put "whall" instead of "while". Also, you need a space after the comma in several places (like the title).
I am glad of this and short chapters, Quantity beats quality.
Continue
Good job. A multitude of mistakes, but minor ones. Now, continue
WE NEED BRUMAKS AND CORPSERS!!!!!
4290291 We'll get to it hold your horses.
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Ha! Hold your horses
Is the title of this fanfic from a song?
4489142 What? No! At least....I don't think so I don't listen to many songs.
Interesting concept!
[youtube=DelhLppPSxY]
4693535 OOHOOHOOH I GOT ONE ALSO
I am not gonna say that this story is bad by any means, but this story needs to slow down just a tad bit
For starters the writing is a bit off putting sometimes do to how it is written, it's kind of hard to keep track with who is talking sometimes do to it jumping from one character to another with little to no exposition.
The story is great above all else but it feels like it is being rushed at some points, and if you need help with writing fight scenes on how to write one I can help talk you through it if you want
YEAH!
Noooooooooooooooooooo, Why?
I loved this story and this has been read by like 80 people! (Not that big of a number but still.)
Please remake the story, I want the king to live!
Long live the king! May he never die!
long may he rain
May someday in this hope-less future that this story will get a re-write.
And it may be bad, or it may be good.
But until then we can only wait till then, So until then this story's MC is now in the bin.
images.forbes.com/media/2011/02/09/0209_gabe-newell_400x400.jpg
I hope this random picture makes you happy.
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He made a new one! At this link!