Another Displaced Human Dilemma

by The Grey Pegasus

[8] [S4E06]-Power Ponies

Another Displaced Human Dilemma
By: Said Grey Pegasus

< 8 >

Power Ponies Plus Pegasus's Proddings

Page flip.

"Oh wow, this is gonna be fun!"

I looked towards the little dragon immersed in his brief moment of excitement. "You done with your preview yet?"

Spike closed the cover on the Power Ponies comic book. "I don't want to be!"

"That ain't how teasers work, buddy," I said as he walked past me to the register.

It was neat, being in a comic shop. I could geek out and nerd out at stuff, just like home. The difference being, I wasn't discreetly geeking out over Friendship is Magic stuff.

For obvious reasons.

Spike invited me to come with him here, since he said he needed to pick up some reading material for when Twilight was off doing her own things. I suspect that this was usually during Twilight's light reading before bed.

For a relative definition of 'light', of course. Which I completely understood.

<And would be hypocritical, considering writing thousands of words during the midnight hours is usually the case with us.>

Or being on the internet.

<Or both.>

"You picking out anything, Stardust?" Spike asked from over near the front counter.

"Uh..." Well, it was hard to choose. I wanted to be familiar with my choices, after all.

"Come on, you can just go pick at random if you want," Spike said. "It's part of the fun! I'll tell you if you made a good choice or not."

"Well..." If he insisted.

I'd base a good choice off of artwork. And maybe a cool title. "The Gunmetal Gry—"

<Sometimes I wonder why I screw with myself. Even as I type this.>

Aaaa-aaann... and... suddenly I... uh... lost the will to pick out something. "Maybe next time."

"You sure?" Spike asked.

<You're sure.>

"Yeah, I'm sure."

<Almost like author-me is a different character from actual typing me...>

I have no idea what's going on yet at the same time completely understand. Also, my hooves are now leading me away from the shelves.

<I guess I'm just going a bit crazy. Transition out.>

<<+>>

"Why am I here again?"

"Because now I can second guess myself and then get an actual differing opinion from a highly similar point of view."

Twilight had basically dragged me along to her and her friends' restoration venture in the palace in the Everfree. Now, I wouldn't really consider myself an interior designer, though I'm quite confident in my artistic abilities. Not that Twilight was aware of such abilities. I think.

I looked at Twilight with a bored expression. "Seriously? That sounds like an excuse."

Twilight took a momentary pause from watching their castle restoration effort to look at me with a raised brow. "What are you talking about?"

"Honestly, I'm..." I paused. "I'm not exactly sure." I mumbled under my breath, "If I'm talking to you even."

Yeah, what is wrong with you this chapter?

<Plot moves forward... what to copy in transcript...>

"Isn't there anything I can help you with, Twilight?" Spike asked.

<How to redirect to put on new rails...>

Are you going insane right now?

"Alright, Stardust, if you really don't think you can add any input, maybe you should just go with Spike," Twilight said.

"It's not like I asked to be here," I told her.

"Well I thought that maybe I could get more looks into your personality here, but apparently not."

I gave her an odd look. "Honestly, I don't think any proper justification by you would have gotten me here."

<Disregard. Walk out.>

I turned away and headed over to where Spike was going. Twilight never said anything back. Either she didn't hear what I said, wasn't listening, or just ignored it.

I really want to shake this feeling that something is off, but I just... can't.

<Refactoring... Re-locking... Settling back in...>

You are not okay. Wait... a lot of things are not okay.

<What are you talking about? Everything is much more okay compared to when I stopped writing this chapter almost a year ago.>

Heavily breaking the fourth wall—that is definitely not okay.

<Return to the episode at once while I figure it all out again.>

But you never even fully figured it out the first time! Now you're just rambling because it's so easy to do. Stop making me ramble, dammit!

<Oh, so that's where we were.>

"I know I saw a magnifying glass laying around the last time I was here..."

That was Spike. I continued walking in the direction of his voice.

"Spike! Where are ya, Spike?" That was Applejack.

"We're breaking for tea and biscuits!" That was Rarity.

I found Spike looking at his comic book intently with a magnifying glass.

"Yo, Spike," I said. "What're you up to? The others are calling for you."

"Not now, Stardust, I'm trying to read this thing... 'Take a closer look to join the adventure in this book'? What does that even mean?"

It was at that moment that there was a bright light coming from Spike's direction.

Twilight, leading the others, entered the room. "Spike! What are you—"

Well, all hell started breaking loose once Spike was apparently being abducted by the comic book. Twilight tried to grab on... then Rainbow... then AJ... and Rarity and Fluttershy too—

"Dusty!"

I yelped as Pinkie yanked me along by her hoof.

"This is gonna be so much fun!" Pinkie exclaimed, heading towards the magic comic book.

"Pinkie!" I tried to protest.

She leapt into the book with me in tow. "Weehee!"

<<+>>

We find our heroes on a dark city rooftop...

And... I... what?

Oh. Oh. Okay. Let's roll. *Ahem*.

We find our heroes on a dark city rooftop...

"Is this... Maretropolis?" Spike said. Clad in the classic comic crime-fighter's garments, the dragon stood up to confirm his suspicions.

He was met with the cityscape of Maretropolis, right before his very eyes. And with a lot more depth than a 2D printed image.

"Somepony wanna tell me what the hay is goin' on?" Applejack asked out loud.

Turning to the voice, Spike found the line-up of the story's heroes. "Holy new personas, ponies! You're the... Masked Matter-Horn! Fili-Second! Zapp! R-Radiance! Mistress Mare-velous! Saddle Rager! You're the... Po—"

POWER PONIES!

DUN. DUN. DA-DA-DA-DAAA-DA!

Twilight perked up, though probably not because I tried to hum a theme tune that may have been familiar to her from a past voice life. Her head swiveled left in right in search for one seemingly missing pony. "Where's Stardust?"

I'm right here!

"Wh—what?!"

I get to be the narrator! Neat! Hohohoho... I get to be the grey pegasus in charge for once.

<As if the fourth wall wasn't wrecked enough.>

"Cool!" Pinkie exclaimed. "Hiya, Yellow Box!"

<Oh. So that's what I am right now.>

This is really weird.

"Can't you do anything to help us out, Stardust?" Twilight pleaded.

Nope. Only narrate. But hey—welcome to my head as it normally is!

"You might be certifiably insane, if it's really like this," Rarity said.

I probably am. Now go! Spike's actually the one supposed to be giving exposition and pointers to you.

Before anyone could raise anymore questions, there was an explosion. The group ran over to the edge of the building to see the commotion.

From the smokey museum facade came a figure combined from generic comic villain traits, Doctor Octopus, and fetish hentai. "Power Ponies!" Mane-iac boomed, before inserting the obligatory evil cackle. "How kind of you to join us!"

The Mane 6 took a moment to digest it.

"Y'know, Stardust," Applejack said, "it'd be a lot easier if you just didn't make so many comments. Now why the hay did she call us Power Ponies?"

Spike came to the obvious realization... which he probably should have already from naming them earlier. "You're the... the superheroes from my comic book! It somehow zapped us all in here!"

"So somepony zap us back out!" Rainbow said.

"My comic book!" Spike remembered. "It said the way to get back to where we started was to defeat the Mane-iac! Your arch-nemesis!"

"Time for the mane event!" the voice from below boomed. Having already thrown a pretzel stand at the Power Ponies, Mane-iac ripped a mailbox from the street to use as a second projectile.

It flew through the air, finding the end of its trajectory where Pinkie was standing.

*SMASH*

However, the pink pony was gone... in a flash.

"Pinkie!" Rainbow yelled. "Where'd she go?!"

"Wheeeeeeee!" Pinkie exclaimed, far away from the others.

Spike explained. "She could be miles away from here by now! Pinkie is Fili-Second, the fastest pony in all of Maretropolis!"

Meanwhile with Pinkie...

"My name is Pinkie Pie, and I am the fastest mare alive!"

Geez, why couldn't you be Deadpool or Spiderman instead...

"But Speed Force yaaay!"

NO, Pinkie. Just... don't.

<Do it, Pinkie! Mess with the timeline!>

"Mmm... the comic plot doesn't get resolved that way though!"

Of all the possible comic characters with reality-altering powers...

Back on the rooftop...

We return to a brief scene with Applejack tied up to a lamp post by her own failure.

"This rope ain't right!" Applejack protested to me.

"Twilight!" Spike called. "Freeze her mane!"

"Do what?!" Twilight questioned.

"You're the Masked Matter-Horn! You can shoot all kinds of crazy power beams from your horn!"

However, the alicorn was not yet accustomed to her powered-down, less over-powered, not-really-alicorn-like state, and was unable to conjure up anything useful.

"STARDUST!"

Mane-iac continued to watch and cackle in amusement. "You know, I'm beginning to enjoy this."

"Help?!"

The plot says no!

"Plot?! To hell with—" The building side had yet another chunk of it blown into debris.

Spike moved on to the next hero in the group. "Dash! Quick! You're Zapp, and your superpower is controlling the mighty forces of nature! Unholster the lightning bolt!"

Rainbow took a moment to process it, before giving it a shot. Her little prop was a lot less impressive than Mjolnir, but it was still her weather-controlling device. However, all she succeeded in doing was creating a tornado.

I think Spike wanted you to make lightning, Dash, not be like Lightning Dust and make a tornado.

"Dust, shut up!" Rainbow yelled.

Pinkie came back at just the right moment to get caught up in the poorly summoned whirlwind. Down below, Mane-iac was laughing her ass off. I suppose she's entitle to it—the whole inter-hero conflict plot really should be farther down the line with better established characters. And maybe a decent moral argument. Because just having character powers clash against each other is boring, right?

"Fluttershy!" Spike yelled desperately. "You're Saddle Rager! Lose your temper, and you'll turn into a huge, super-strong monster!"

"Oh, gosh!" Fluttershy replied. "That wouldn't... be very... polite!"

But aren't you always angry, Fluttershy?

"No?!"

Spike was really grasping at straws here. "Ugh! Rarity! Use your jewelry to create attack constructs!"

"What's an attack construct?!" Rarity asked.

"Just think of something, anything, and your bracelet makes it appear!"

Imagination powers! Your animated costume compels you, Rarity Reynolds!

Unfortunately, Rarity had either poor imagination or priorities, because all she conjured up was a china set.

"I do not have poor imagination!" Rarity protested. "And what do you mean, 'animated costume'?"

Ah, she's right. They're all animated!

<Hm... well, this line was written just a few months after February 2016...>

You really got to get back into the present. Anyways, physics decided to give Spike a break, and launched him out of the tornado, right next to—

"The Electro-Orb!" Spike grabbed ahold of it, then attempted to sneak away.

Then he tripped on his cape.

<To repeat an age-old adage: NO. CAPES.>

The Electro-Orb was snatched up by Mane-iac. "Why, thank you, Hum Drum!" She disappeared in a fit of evil laughter.

"I'm Hum Drum...?!" Spike exclaimed in horror. Oh no..."

*CRASH*

Sounds of destruction notified Spike of more immediate issues than his self-esteem. He jumped into action, reaching out to the only pony not stuck in the tornado.

"Applejack! You gotta... help stop the... tornado from destroying.. the city!"

"But every time I move, this darn lasso gets tighter!" Applejack said, still tied to the lamp post. Kinky stuff, AJ.

"By Celestia, I wish you were actually down here with us, Stardust..." Applejack grumbled.

<Really though, shame she couldn't be Batmare instead. Because ooooh her parents are deeeaaaad.>

"You're psychically connected to it!" Spike explained to our Wonder Woman expy. "Will it to where you want it to go, and it'll obey you!"

The most straight-headed pony of the group was able to actually accomplish her intended action, lassoing the tornado down. Upon doing so, the rest of the group were able to recover and regroup.

"Lemme get this straight," Applejack started, "We've been sucked into some kind of comic-book world?"

"Technically, it's called Maretropolis," Spike explained. And if we wanna get back to Ponyville, I think we have to stop the Mane-iac from using her doomsday device to destroy it!"

"No biggie," Rainbow said. "I was already awesome—"

You did copy Lightning Dust well, down to the uncontrolled tornado sweeping up your friends.

Rainbow glared at an arbitrary direction. "... And now we've all got superpowers!"

"Almost all of us have superpowers..." Spike lamented.

"But you must have them too, Spikey-boo," Rarity said. "Your character is wearing a cape!"

Hey, did you just assume his character's role? Assumptions!

"Stardust..."

"No, Stardust is right..." Spike said. "Hum Drum's pretty much useless..."

Twilight looked at the situation more literally, finding a bright side. "Good thing you're not really Hum Drum, then."

Exactly! Spike, you can be more useful than the character you're cosplaying as! Ain't that a fun one.

Rainbow, scanning the cityscape, was already ready to jump back into action. "So the six of us Power Ponies will take care of Mane-iac, and get us back to Ponyville!"

"Spike, where is the Mane-iac building her doomsday device?" Twilight asked.

"Her top-secret headquarters!" Spike answered. "But you'd better get there quick. That glowing orb she just stole is what she's going to use to power it up!"

"Lead the way, Spike!" Applejack said.

"Then leave the rest to us!"

Classic Rainbow.

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

Transition go!

"Wha—"

<<+>>

Outside of Mane-iac's totally nondescript headquarters...

A neon sign depicting a shampoo business flickered in the night.

"There it is!" Spike exclaimed.

"Is that a... shampoo factory?" Applejack noted observationally.

Twilight started strategizing. "All right, Power Ponies, here's the plan. Rarity, you, me and—"

"Come on out, Mane-iac!" Rainbow taunted as she sprung into action. "Or the Power Ponies are comin' in!"

Leeroy Jenkins went ahead and charged in, actually casting 'lightning' this time, hitting the neon sign. The sign was now reduced to a burnt and twisted wall ornament.

Twilight rolled her eyes. "So much for element of surprise."

"Guess I'll just hang back here doing nothing..." Spike lamented.

"Oh, I don't think she's home," Fluttershy said, hoping. "Maybe we should just come back later..."

She was answered with Mane-iac's undeniable laugh of evil.

"She's home," Rarity noted flatly.

The garage door opened, revealing the welcoming party of a bunch of warm-up mooks.

"Time to Power Pony up!" Applejack exclaimed.

Super Sentai stance!

"Ooh! Nice catchphrase!" Pinkie said, regarding Applejack's rally.

<Interestingly, the speedster geeking out over how cool the team looks in their is actually relevant now...>

I'm not really sure that really makes things that much more interesting though. And you're still breaking the rules you set.

<Ah, just let me have the chapter.>

You're lucky it's the one chapter where we both get to go nuts.

"Freeze ray!"

<Ooh, ooh, the action's starting!>

Comic narrator role go!

<Do sound effects, do sound effects! Even if they're not exactly accurate, just do 'em!>

*ZAP*

Matter-Horn fired a beam of ice powers... or what should've been. Instead, the henchpony was pelted by some irritating snow.

"It's an improvement, darling," Rarity commented from beside Twilight.

<Oh! Oh, wait! You also gotta italicize small random things! Like gadgets and special note stuff!>

Hm... Right. Got it!

Meanwhile, Mistress Mare-velous was dealing with her own problem—with noted ease. She threw two hoofrangs at the charging pony-

*ZING* *THACK* *THUD*

—catching his legs, causing him to trip.

<Nice job, Batmare. This is why you are best pony.>

Fili-Second was also quickly dealing with food things on her end. Eating, smacking some hapless henchpony's face—

*ZOOM*

—all in a few seconds' work.

Radiance was handling henchponies with ease, putting her conjuring powers to quick work.

*BANG*

Above her, another mook put the destroyed neon sign from earlier to some last use, bucking it off of its mounts in an attempt to crush Radiance. At the cost of one of his own guys, but that's how they roll apparently.

Radiance was quick with her wits though, and formed an umbrella attack (defense?) construct to protect from the steel rain. The sign rebounded upwards—

*CRASH*

—finding its final resting place as scattered debris.

"Ooh, I do so love a functional accessory!" Rarity remarked, admiring her bracelets of power.

Elsewhere in the brawl, Fluttershy was being a pacifist. She wouldn't even do anything against the pony rushing her.

*ZAP* "My hair!"

But at least Zapp was getting some good target practice with the lightning strikes. The singed henchpony was stunned by his ruined hairdo.

"Seriously?" Rainbow said to Fluttershy, bewildered. "You aren't even just a little angry right now?"

Come on, Flutters. I believe you're just always angry inside.

Fluttershy shrank away at that comment.

"Nice work, Power Ponies!" Twilight said confidently. "Now let's take care of the Mane-iac and get ourselves home!"

As if summoned, the supervillain appeared.

"I don't think so!" Mane-iac said. "I have a city to destroy, and I'm not about to let the Power Ponies stop me! Not this time!"

"Just watch us!" Rainbow said.

Mane-iac pulled out a giant weapon.

"The Hairspray of Doom!" Spike identified. "It stops you in your tracks and renders your powers useless!"

You're gonna want to speak up there, Hum Drum. Our heroes are unaware of this!

Zapp, however, helpfully demonstrated its effects to the others anyways, with her charge being met by a spray of the dangerous gas.

*HISS* *CLINK*

She fell to the ground, incapacitated.

"We'll just see about that!" Radiance declared defiantly.

However... our heroes... chose poorly, and tried to attack in the same frontal-attack manner.

*HISS*

The Power Ponies were quickly subdued, and Mane-iac released a well-deserved evil laugh.

Two (one?) of the Power Ponies remained, hidden in and behind a mailbox.

"Fluttershy, please!" Spike pleaded. "Just a little anger?!"

"Well, I'm not so much angry as I am concerned, bordering on terrified!" Fluttershy replied.

Mane-iac appeared behind them, bringing the count to... well, just Hum Drum.

"Stardust, do you really have to rub it in?..." Spike mumbled. However, his attention proper was grabbed by Mane-iac looking at him face-to-face, grinning the grin of a victor.

"Don't spray!" Spike winced in anticipation.

"Oh, Hum Drum, why in all of Maretropolis would I use the Hairspray Ray of Doom on you?" Mane-iac mocked. "Rather pointless, don't you think?

With that, Mane-iac dragged off the six immobilized Power Ponies, leaving Hum Drum to reflect on his failure.

"Stardust..."

<You should conjure up something to rub in his uselessness a little more.>

*CLANG*

Spike looked down at the bucket he had just stepped in, mirroring the situation at the start. A symbol of his uselessness.

Oh, and to answer your question, Spike, yes, I do.

<<+>>

A short while later, in the vents in Mane-iac's headquarters...

"What am I supposed to do? I'm useless," Spike thought out loud. "No wonder my friends never need me to do anything important. They're the ones with superpowers. They've probably already figured out how to escape."

Geez, Spike. I wasn't that serious earlier. Have some pride in yourself.

"I'd feel a lot better if—"

*CLANG*

Yeah, that one's on you...

Clumsily, the dragon fell out of the air vent passageway, and onto a suspended walkway. Before he could retort, he saw his friends still trapped in a cage.

"They're still in trouble!"

Down in the cage, the mares were still doing their best to accomplish something.

Twilight felt some movement return. However, this was already known by the villains, who had a timer set to ring when the effects were known to start wearing off.

The giant hairspray sprayed their cage, fully re-freezing them.

"Congratulations, Power Ponies!" Mane-iac laughed. "You shall live just long enough to see me fire... the instrument of your destruction!"

<Behold!>

The Hair-Dryer-Inator-Some-Number!

Spike tried to correct from off-screen (off-panel?). "Actually, Stardust, it's called—"

He was interrupted by another cackle. "Once the Electro-Orb has powered it up completely, this cannon will amplify the power of my mane one million times, expelling an energy blast that will cause everypony in Maretropolis's mane to grow wild!"

<That sounds bad.>

Shush.

"You will be my weapon's first victims, and there is nopony who can save you from this fate!" The crazed villain laughed again.

"Ahem," Fluttershy spoke up. "I don't mean to interrupt, but aren't you forgetting about somebody?"

"Hum Drum? Little guy? No superpowers whatsoever?" Mane-iac laughed at the absurdity of the thought. "He's utterly useless!"

The timer rang again, signaling the hairspray interval.

"Puh-lease. Everypony knows you just keep him around because you feel sowwy for him. Wah. Wah."

That's heavy.

"You get how I feel yet?" Spike commented.

"Maybe in your world," Twilight objected. "But in our world, Spike—uh, Hum Drum always comes through when we need him! Always!"

Yeah, that's the spirit, Twilight! Break that fourth wall!

Twilight seemed to have picked up the narration this time. "Well..."

"Stardust, if you were down here, I bet you'd be able to talk that loony Mane-iac to death," Applejack said.

I wish I was so I could try. Alas, I'm stuck as a disembodied voice.

Rarity rolled her eyes. "Shame..."

Back at the walkway, the rousing speech was what Spike needed to realize he was a main character after all.

"I'm not like Hum Drum!" Spike exclaimed quietly. "When my friends really need me, I do come through! And they need me now!"

With renewed resolve, Spike set out to enact a working rescue plan.

"I see dementia must be a side-effect of prolonged exposure to the Hairspray Ray of Doom." Mane-iac laughed.

She turned to give her big villain speech. "Tonight, we stand upon the brink of immortality, for we collectively—though, mostly me—have finally defeated our most hated nemeses! We have hurled the brush of badness into the now fearful face of goodness, and have struck a blow for freedom in the name of oppression! And nothing will stop us!"

<... Cool.>

In the background, Spike was setting up a trap with... various implements he found?

"No time to talk, Stardust," Spike said. "I've got friends to save."

He pushed off this giant crate off a raised walkway. It was connected to a chain, which was connected to a large tarp, which quickly tightened to ensnare a good chunk of Mane-iac's forces.

<Comic mode—>

Go!

*RINGRINGRING*

Spike swung from a chain like a badass—

*THWACK*

—punting the hairspray operator from his position, knocking over the giant hairspray in the process.

"Way to go, Spike!" Twilight cheered.

Within a few more seconds, the mares were free and their powers were back. Radiance cut them out of the cage with a conjured file.

"Get mad!" Rainbow encouraged Fluttershy.

"I'm trying!" Fluttershy said, straining. "And no, Stardust, I'm not angry inside!"

Fili-Second distracted the other henchponies with her incredible speed, causing Mane-iac frustration.

"Over there!" Mane-iac yelled. "There! There!" She clutched her head in bewilderment. "Idiots!"

<Huh. 'Idiots' was allowed in the script... Guess I really forgot the nuances of this show.>

*ZAP*

Three henchponies were quickly dealt with as the floor beneath them was turned into ice by Matter-Horn.

"Stardust?" Twilight said.

What?

"Now that I think of it, you're missing out on some great fun."

Maybe, but spectating and commenting is pretty fun too.

"Still, pretending to be superheroes? I didn't expect to be transported into some fictional realm to be something I'm not, but I'll give it credit for how fun it turned out to be!"

Yeah, well, I know that feeling much more than you'd expect...

"Huh?"

<Heeey! You're missing the action!>

Dammit, Twi, now you made me miss out on some narration!

*SCREAMS* More screams. *WILHELM SCREAM*

<Huh. Oh look, Twilight seemed to have figured out more powers. Guess she's really having fun.>

I wonder what Spike's up to.

"Looking for Fluttershy!" Spike responded. He quickly found said pony trying to make a quiet exit. "Fluttershy, where are you going?"

Fluttershy smiled meekly. "You seem to have everything under control."

"Fluttershy, we need you!" Spike pleaded. "You have to power up!"

Yeah, Fluttershy! Do it!

<Do it! Do it!>

She can't hear you...

"Who can't hear me?" Fluttershy asked. She shook her head, turning her attention back to Spike. "I'm sorry, it's just that nothing is making me mad."

*SMACK*

Mana-iac's firefly bitch slap seemed to have been amplified to a boom, as Fluttershy saw the injured firefly land next to her.

"Oh, goodness!" Fluttershy exclaimed. "Are you okay?"

Ah, I think the firefly will be fine. After all, it just saved your life.

Fluttershy glared at Mane-iac, doer of evil, including the great evil of smacking a firefly that was ruining her aim.

Hey Flutters, you angry yet?

"YES," she flatly answered with a deepening voice.

Hulk up! Hulk up! Hulk—

*ROAR*

Yeah!

<Yeah!>

"Yeah!" Spike agreed.

The reactions of the other mares seemed to indicate the same.

The giant dryer laser fired—

*BZOOO*

—and did absolutely nothing except reflect back at her.

<Hoist by your own petard, bitch.>

*SMASH* *SMASHSMASH*

After a few moments more of destroying the machine, Saddle Rager noticed the now-calm factory floor. It was clear that the Power Ponies had accomplished their mission.

"My mane!" Everyone looked over at the Mane-iac, who had clearly now lost her mind in defeat. And taking the full force of her weapon's laser. Tied up by her own mane, all she could do now was lose her mind further in her laughs of insanity. "My maaaaaane!"

The team looked proudly at their work. Spike began summing it up. "Once again, the day is saved by—"

THE POWER P—

<<+>>

The first thing I heard were the screams of the group.

Then I felt the impact of the floor. Or one of their bodies.

"Oof." I stood up and shook my limbs around. "Huh."

"Awesome!" Rainbow jumped.

"Whoo-ee!" Applejack agreed.

Everyone was clearly excited. I was too—it was like walking out of a fun movie.

"Did you see how I was raining down a storm of justice at the end there?!" Rainbow said.

"You catch how I was wieldin' that lasso?" Applejack added.

Then Pinkie offered a platter. "Cupcakes?

"How did you—" Rarity started.

"Eh, we had a good half second before we got sucked back out of the comic, and the Maretropolis bakery was only sixty-five blocks away!" Pinkie explained.

<You know, I don't really think the magic comic book is supposed to work that way.>

Well, I'm still stuck in a magic cartoon. So you know what? Cupcakes it is. I started grabbing for one.

Applejack slapped my hoof away, smirk on her face. "Hey there, fast-talker, you didn't do anythin' except narrate and make snide comments. How about lettin' the actual ponies that did work get their rewards first?"

Rarity added in. "And if our experience was, as you mentioned at the start, how your normal mental state is, I think you should get yourself checked, Stardust."

"I'm perfectly fine..." I said.

"I agree!" Pinkie added.

"I'm just glad to be back," Spike said.

<Me too, Spike. Me too.>

"We wouldn't have made it without you, Spike," Twilight said. And I hope you realize that just because we don't always need your help, it doesn't mean that we don't think you're helpful."

"And that you don't have to have superpowers to be a super friend."

Everyone agreed with that sentiment.

"But I do have one question," Twilight continued. "Where exactly did you get that comic book?"

"This one I got in Canterlot at the House of Enchanted Comics," Spike answered. "Well, I didn't know it meant they were literally enchanted!"

"If you think about it, that kind of thing was a bit dangerous..." I noted.

"Ah, you're just jealous you missed out," Rainbow teased.

"They probably have some failsafes built into it just in case?" Twilight suggested.

Despite everyone else's incredulity, Spike still tried to justify himself. "I thought it just meant, like, the comics they sold there had really enchanting storylines! Hey, wait up! I'm an important part of this team, remember?!"

And with that, I felt the show cameras stop rolling.

<<+>>

"Lucky! Luckyyyy!"

I entered Lucky's house, which at this point was also going to be home for me for the foreseeable future.

"Stardust!" The voice came from upstairs, and shortly after, hoofsteps were coming down the stairs. The gray earth pony came into view.

"I wasn't interrupting anything, was I?" I asked my landlord-slash-housemate. I mean, I didn't think I was interrupting anything, since he looked perfectly relaxed.

"Nah, just a light nap," Lucky replied. "What about you?"

"Is Roseluck here?" I asked, already starting to walk past Lucky.

"Uh, yeah. Why?"

"I'm going to bed," I said, feeling my mind start to drag.

"Long day?"

"Feels longer than it should've. Just want to get my head down and into some quiet."

I didn't hear Lucky say anything until I was halfway up the stairs. It sounded more like a comment to himself rather than talking to me. "Well, an hour earlier and you would've had problems..."

If I could see his face, he was probably saying that with a plain, blank expression. But I could be wrong. Maybe he was smugly grinning about that past hour instead.

Author's Note:

Well.

<Well.>

>GREEEY! SEASON 7 STARTS, LIKE, TOMORROW!<

<Dammit, Pinkie, I thought that leaving you out of the ending scene would leave you out of the A/N.>

>No amount of writing can stop my determination! Besides, this is important!<

<So it's almost been an entire year. I had life stuff.>

Which seems to have been resolved enough?

<I sure hope so. And hey—at least it wasn't 'almost two years' like the intermission between trying to write this story the first time, then trying to write it the second time.>

>You better stick to it this time, mister! You've got three seasons left to write this time!<

If I'm being honest, I'm not really sure how this is going to turn out.

<Well, third time's the charm. Let's not let things stop me this time. Maybe I can catch up before halfway through Season 7?>

Let's see it.

<You know, including that backlog of various other things.>

Sigh. Third time's the charm...

Comments

[totallynotabrony]

I've never seen anyone cross and re-cross the meta line so often and get away with it.

[The Grey Pegasus]

8096459
Unfortunately, this is the peak of that fun, I think, because this is the only time everyone gets to be affected by the meta.

At least until Luna's dream episode in Season 5, I guess.

[Housecarl of Clan Drops]

"I'm trying!" Fluttershy said, straining. "And no, Stardust, I'm not angry inside!"

I thought Stardust was going to keep poking at the hulk reference until Fluttershy was just mad at him instead of how it ended up.
Still been a fun read so far.