• Member Since 24th Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen 10 hours ago

cealdra


Comments ( 5 )

Very interesting and well thought out. Could use a bit of spell-check and editing for grammar and paragraphs, but otherwise well done. :twilightsmile:

3426683
True, true.
I`m the first to admit that my grammar is horrible (even in my native)I`m looking for a editor/pre-reader.
But tnx for the positive reply :twilightsmile:

Just hope that the downvoters would tell me whats bugging them so i could learn from it:twilightsheepish:

Normally seeing so many grammatical errors would turn me off of a story, but your story-telling was excellent enough that it drew me back in... if you were to get a proof-reader I'd say it would be fantastic.

I don't see any Explicit material, and even the gore doesn't extend beyond a paragraph, If you want a hint of the mixture involved Read my story 'Everypony Loves Blueblood' you'll understand what would in tail both. however I would rate this story teen.

Now that that is out of the way, I can say this, I like this story and the take you have on Assassin shy.

Cheers:twilightsmile:

When I saw the part about teleportation, I thought we were going into a grimdark grimdark of a story. But it's got nothing to do with 40k, not that that's a bad thing. Good story, for a one shot at least.

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