It's no secret that Rainbow Dash knows everything about her idols, the Wonderbolts. But, when a tip from Rainbow puts a nice chunk of change in Rarity's back pocket during her stay in Canterlot, the pair try their hands- or, in this case, hooves- at a rather unconventional means of making a living.
Rated Teen for gambling, mild use of alcohol, and other Vegas-related themes.
Comments welcomed and appreciated, let me know what you think.
I think it needs more changelings!
But then again, every story does!
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hors d'ouvre
I like the idea, but I think that spending most of the first chapter recapping an episode most every reader will have already seen was a mistake
3401929
Initially, I was uncomfortable doing that as well, but I decided it would be fine to reiterate the episode for the purpose of exposition, since this is the beginning of a story. I don't intend for the following chapters to follow the same format.
3402231
Yeah, but the beginning of the story is what has to hook people in, especially when you're a new author.
Personally I would have begun with the letter to Rainbow Dash and told the lead up via flashback. Just my two cents.
"You do like money, don't you darling?"
"Well, yeah, but what's that got to do with any--"
"Then it's settled! We shall make for Canterlot at once! But first, I really must make you a new dress for our outing!"
"W-what? Wait, what are-- Aghh!"
^_^ I'm looking forward to part 2. Shenanigans shall ensue!