Chapter 5
"Oh buck!"
The humans ears were assaulted by the frantic screams of Love Tap, it was completely and utterly unexpected, like when you remember that you forgot your phone at school halfway back home.
"I forgot to tell Button that you're supposed to be a secret!"
This was slightly more serious than a misplaced phone.
Love Tap was going at speeds that could easily rip the doors off their hinges, trying to catch up to Button to stop his blabbermouth.
She could see it now:
"Oh hello schoolmates ages 10 to 12 that I associate with on a regular basis!" said Button Mash as he walked into his classroom.
"Hello totally believe due to the fact we are so trustworthy of anypony because of our young age 12 year old colt!" announced the classroom.
"I have recently acquired an extraterrestrial in my home! Even though this is a completely ridiculous and unsupported statement coming from an imaginative 12 year old, you will also believe me because you are also 12 year olds with very active imaginations, and also no sense of danger!"
"Tally Ho! To Button's house! School is canceled for the day!" Exclaimed Cheerilee.
...She might have been exaggerating just a tiny bit.
But, before she could make a mad dash to her son. A hand gently touched her shoulder.
"It's alright Love Tap, let them come."
Love Tap was genuinely surprised at this.
"But...but your not even at full health yet! Best case scenario; we have a bunch of hyperactive foals running around you constantly asking questions and bringing other foals to see you. Worst case scenario; you get sent to the moon!"
The human visibly flinched at her statement. A look of utter confusion on his face as he processed Love Tap's panicked analyzation.
"That seems... a bit drastic, don't you think?"
Love Tap was trying to calm herself by taking deep breaths. The past days events were finally wearing her down. She needed a vacation, or something to calm her down.
"I... I need a drink." Love Tap said as she went toward the kitchen.
"A... drink of what?" asked the human.
"Hard apple cider. Calms the nerves right down." she said as she rummages through her cabinets to find the one bottle of cider that she has stored over the years.
"Horseapples, almost out..." she already took a trip to the bottle already, and there was only half of the bottle left. The cider wasn't the strongest drink out there, takes one bottle of the stuff to get her legitimately drunk. But, ponies don't drink the cider for the alcohol, they drink it for the heavenly taste.
"Whoa...that's strong." His nose crinkled as his heightened sense of smell took in what technically was his first encounter with alcohol.
"It's not that strong, I really don't know much about alcohol, but this bottle could get me tipsy back in the day, but never under the table."
"...What?"
"...Nothing. Is the smell too much for you?"
"No, it's alright. Though I-"
His ears perked as he turned his head towards the entrance. His eyes narrowed as he stood up and slowly walked towards the window.
"Something's coming..." He whispered as his eyes closed.
"What?" Love Tap asked.
The sounds of guards marching around the castle could be heard. Celestia was silently waiting for her sister to come around.
Celestia could sense the magic signature that proceeded a teleportation. She turned to the spot where the magic was originating from, silently waiting.
A bright light flashed as the lunar princess materialized in front of her sister. The two rulers of Equestria, day and night, seen as the most powerful ponies in existence. Second only to Faust herself...
"Sister... is it true? After all these years, a human has finally been spotted?" she asks, her face hopeful and fearful at the same time.
"Yes sister. But, we cannot mince words... she has already mobilized her forces."
Luna's mane crackled with energy as she snorted in righteous anger. Her mane darkened slightly as her teeth slowly started to grow a pair of fangs.
"Control yourself Luna." Celestia calmly said, that sentence though held a pressure that would have knocked a regular pony unconscious. Luna realized that she was letting herself go, and promptly returned to her original form.
"Our apologies sister." said Luna, unintentionally slipping into the royal we. "We shall save it for the fight."
Celestial nodded as she shifted in her armor. Red Sun, as she came to call it, forged in the heart of a Magnetar Neutron Star by her hooves. It could easily be the best armor in Equestria, it multiplied her power 100 fold, and turned her once flowing rainbow mane into it's flaming equivalent. The armor had a natural shine to it that almost blinded anypony foolish enough to stare at it for a prolonged period of time.
Rivaling Celestia's Red Sun armor was Luna's Blue Moon. Forged in the infinite gravity of a black hole's singularity, it offers the same enhancements as Celestial's armor, with some key differences.
Luna's armor, at her whim, can lock anything that she desires inside a different dimension for a short time, like she herself was a black hole. Her armor also absorbed any and all light that dared come too close.
Celestia's armor, on the other side of the spectrum, can transport her into another physical plain for a short time, transforming her into a phoenix like incarnation of herself.
"We never thought we would see the day we would wear this armor again..." Luna said with a sad tone in her voice.
"I concur sister... but we have to take up arms once again, for the safety of all Equestria..."
"You know as well as I do what happens when we dawn this armor." Luna started, finally slipping out of the royal we, "something precious is always lost... father, mother, the residents of Sunny town... them."
"I know Luna... I know. But we must not let what happened in the past happen again, we must break the bad omens that surround these sets of armor." The sun princess turned her head and addressed the guard that was closest to them.
"Yes, your majesty?"
"I want the castle locked down and Canterlot secure, we don't know if she will take advantage of our absence and send a group here, understand?."
"Yes your majesty...permission to ask a question?"
"Permission granted."
"Will you be with any guards while on your journey to Ponyvillie?"
"No, my little pony... we do not want any distractions while in this armor. I do not want the loss of any of my ponies today."
"...Yes, your majesty" the guard said as he bowed and went on to carry his orders.
"...I still do not understand the logic behind letting stallions become members of the guard." Luna added when the guard was out of hearing range.
"Lots of things has changed during your banishment, my dear sister. A stallion does not solely belong in the kitchen or the home anymore."
"What's coming?" Love Tap asked as she followed the human to the window.
"It... it sounds like... bouncing."
Sure enough, the signature sound of Pinkie Pie's bounce walk finally made itself known to Love Tap's ears.
"Oh dear..." She knew that it would prove futile to try to keep a secret from Pinkie Pie, everypony in town knew her her 'Pinkie Sense' and how it could seemingly predict the future...
'Buck it.'
Love Tap didn't even try to detain Pinkie, she just opened the door and waited for her to bounce in like a self-propelling icy ball.
"Come on in Pink-"
Her sentence was interrupted as a pink blur zipped passed her. Comically spinning her around in place, when she stopped; her eyes were spinning, and birds magically appeared over her head.
"Hi! My names Pinkie Pie! Do-"
--The following line of text is a test of the emergency Pinkie Pie tangent alarm system, if this was an actual occurrence, you would have to sit there and try to decipher the run on sentence that contained no spacing in the words of said sentence to illustrate the speed at which Pinkie is talking. Although this method is somewhat accurate, it is difficult to read and may cause involuntary eye strain. Good day.--
"-and then they did a barrel roll! Not the not that starfox does, because that's an ailerons roll! Do you know what 'Tax Exemption' is?" Pinkie finished her 4 minute barrage of questions. To which the human visibly shuddered at.
"The- what? Oh...ummm...what?"
"I asked 'do you like parties'?"
"...Yes?"
"One's with balloons?"
"...Balloon party?"
Techno music suddenly started blasting as the room suddenly became the biggest party Love Tap's house has ever seen. Ponies popped into existence as they were dancing to the beat of the song.
"Disco lights! Disco lights!"
Love Tap and the human were completely and utterly surprised by the sudden party bomb, the human flinched and recoiled back at the sudden increase in volume, smells, and other changes that he could pick up.
Being blind for a lifetime meant that he developed extremely powerful senses.
One of them including sonar.
Imagine the surprise that a man who basically sees through hearing and smell receives when the sound suddenly increases from 'quiet household' to:
It isn't a nice experience.
Everypony was oblivious to the human on the ground, holding his ears as he tried to calm himself after the initial shock of...well Pinkie.
"So, how do you like your surprise party!?" Pinkie screamed as she was bouncing in the air. Giggling like a mad mare.
"Oh, I'm surprised alright!" the human said, or screamed, because of the volume.
"Yay!" Pinkie said happily as she hugged the human, snuggling into his chest "I'm glad you like it!"
That hug seemed to calm him down an iota. He returned the hug of the crazy, physics defying, pure sugar smelling mare.
"Wanna dance!?" Pinkie asked the befuddled human.
"Wait, what about the other-"
She took that as a yes.
Pinkie dragged the human to the epicenter of the pony dance floor, she started moving and dancing with the human in her hooves. He couldn't even. He just couldn't even.
"What the buck is that!?" screamed a familiar tomboyish voice.
"How did we get here!?" screamed a random stallion in the back. Everypony knew that answer for that, he must've been new here.
"Human!" screamed a turquois unicorn.
"Hey everypony! This is..." Pinkie turned to the human "what's your name?"
"...I can't remember."
"Okay! Pretty weird name. Okay everypony, this here is 'I can't remember' and he's new to ponyvillie! Even though he looks different, we can't judge a book by its cover! Isn't that right, Zecora?"
The group of confused ponies turned to the mare in question, who was sipping a cup of tea next to a very disheveled Love Tap.
"Although it was a surprise when I appeared here." she took another sip of her tea, "Pinkie is right, we have nothing to fear." she pointed to the human, more specifically, his eyes "look, his eyes are as white as the stripes on my back. So there is no reason to attack." she tossed a look to Rainbow Dash, who shrunk back into the crowd slowly. "It would go against the lessons of love and friendship we have been taught. For you see, he cannot."
Everypony looked at the human in surprise as they confirmed Zecora's rhyme speak. His eyes were a milky white that almost glowed in the access light of the room.
"Your blind!?" Pinkie gasped as she looked at the human in question.
"Yes."
"Wow! That's a new one! Most of these stories usually have some long haired white guy as the protagonist! Not being racist, though."
"...I'll take your word for it-"
The room suddenly became dead silent as the human violently lurched his head toward the ceiling, and Pinkie's puffy mane suddenly became flat and lifeless.
"Oh no..." Pinkie fearfully whispered, "Flat mane...that means something really, really, really bad is going to happen."
"...Buzzing." the human whispered as he started walking towards the front door of Love Tap's home. as soon as he was outside, he stared out towards the horizon with his useless eyes. The ponies followed the alien to the entrance, trying to find what he was 'staring' at.
"Buzzing? Now, I ain't calling you a liar, stranger, but ah don't hear...any..." from inside the crowd of ponies, an orange mare with a golden blonde mane addressed the human, but her sentence was derailed by the horrible sight that was starting to form.
The sky slowly started to turn black, not all at once though. It was like a sweeping wave of darkness slowly devouring the sky as the buzzing sound started to become more prominent in the ears of the partygoers...
"What are those?" asked the human. The ponies shook in fear as the buzzing sound became louder and louder, and the black wave started to completely turn the sky black.
The human could feel the warmth of the sun escape his body as it was blotted out.
"C-c...changlings!" The crowd screamed as they began to panic. Trying their best to reach their homes before the changelings attacked...
It would be a futile afford though, because the changeling only focus...
Was the human. And they were hungry...
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machinegun pacing and rpg style (stats realy?) armor hmmm...
3501021 Zerg rushes aren't exactly paced. Jk, the armor is just a big reference. Do you know what it is? I'll slow it down some later. I just had to get that specific idea out there before I lost interest in it and forgot.
3501042
party
sadly the reference is lost to me
idunno maybe it feels rushed for me because i skimmed the
changelings are like:"NYERGH,HOMIN SEMIN!"
3501054 One hint, the names of the armor.
Changelings are like Zerglings... you counter with Marines.
Kinda pissed you single out the changelings but I will look pass that.
Oooooooo boy we gunna get some grade A action up in this shindig!
3501414 Don't worry, it isn't all their fault.
Sounds like pinkie watches game theory
And I am soooo going to use the pinkie emergency thingy
3501805 Write on brotha
Are you actually talking about Sonar like Daredevil or are you talking about something like this...
3502032 Wow... both I think?
3502162 Have you ever heard about ''Zatoichi: the blind samurai''? Maybe that cane he got, isn't just a cane?
3502265 Win a cane sword in a poker game? Hell of a day.
while the idea is interesting. the story and writing is not. i got lost 3 times. the story is incredibly fast and lacks details when explaining things
The reference was the song, i lold
3503020 I know right? The introduction of the human to the ponies was too spontaneous (damn you Pinkie), and some parts are a little ambiguous for my liking.
A take on the HiE concept that I haven't seen before.
I find this both interesting and worthy of my time.
I shall be waiting for future updates eagerly.
3504227 Thank you kindly.
3504260 should have had him say his name was "not sure" because of the movie IDIOCRACY
3504366 should have named him 'what'
This felt really rushed and thats is disappointing. I had such hopes that this would turn out to be a good fluid story, now it just, no, just no.
Sephiroth?
NONE CAN STAND THE ALMIGHTY POWER OF BLINDNESS! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
3510025
Random background guy in sponge bob: MY EYES! *eyeballs catch on fire*
3524444
Random Fish: MY LEGS!
Is it because humans can hug less awkwardly than ponies and thus can sustain love and hugs better?
3526714 1. Your name gives me memories of Ice Spike from SKYRIM...I hate mages. 2. Ehhh...your close.
YES! ME CLOSE! Also I don't really like Skyrim... or any Eldar Scrolls games for that matter, sorry
3527331
Not to be rude or anything but you keep spelling ponyville wrong.
Love the story though
It was also made of Mahogany! Mmm...Mahogany....
What?
What?
WHAT?
Please, just- no.
This is just... 
Did you actually read what you put there? Did you not think for a second that maybe every little bit of the info dump on their armor was just slightly ridiculous?
Edit: Oh, and thank you for turning Pinkie Pie into a one-dimensional, reference spouting fanon meme.
4462148 last sentence who doesn't do that
really one eyes closed and and the others raised in a like really but this will have to do.
What if... human is... DAREDEVIL!!!!!!!
)
.....
.....
.....
(I meant to put an omg rage face meme here... but I dont know HOWWW
"Lots of things has changed during your banishment, my dear sister. A stallion does not solely belong in the kitchen or the home anymore."
Hey celestia, buck you.
Lol keep up the funnies.