Homer fell hard onto a hard wooden floor with a loud “THUD!”
“Ohhh,” Homer moaned. “Why does everything hard hurt so much?”
He got up, made slightly more difficult than usual as his belly had made a small crater in the floor.
“Now where am I?”
“Screw you, I'm not talking to you until you listen to me,” said his brain.
"Never!"
It was a little dark for some reason, but wherever he was, it wasn’t anywhere he’d been before. Homer stepped backwards, attempting to survey his surroundings, until his very large behind bumped into something, making him take a pratfall.
“D’OH!”
He got up, turned around, and gasped to see the most pleasing sight of his day. Underneath a counter, behind a glass case were rows and rows of cakes. There were big ones, small ones, round ones, square ones, frosted ones, multilayered ones, and jelly rolls. There were also several trays of cupcakes, all frosted and some sprinkled.
“Mmmm… cake…”
Homer reached out to take a cake, but his hand was stopped by the aforementioned layer of glass.
“Wuh?”
He tried pounding on the glass.
"So that’s the way it’s gonna be is it?” Homer asked the case rhetorically.
Homer took several steps back before charging at the case. He leapt at the case, but overshot it and the counter, and crashed into the wall on the other side, crumpling onto the floor below.
“D’ooooooh…” he moaned.
Then he noticed a handle on the glass.
“Muh?”
He pulled on it, and the case opened.
“WOOHOO!”
He immediately began feasting on the sugary delicacies within.
Pinkie Pie woke up earlier than she usually did. Whenever this happened, she always had too much energy to stay in bed, so she always got up.
Of course, she never minded this.
“Good Morning, Ponyville!!” exclaimed Pinkie as he jumped out of bed. “Wait, I can’t say ‘good morning, Ponyville’ unless everypony can hear it!” She opened up her window. “GOOD MORNING, PONYVILLE!!!” she shouted. She then closed it and cheerfully trotted downstairs while the few early risers outside massaged their ears.
She froze on the stairs when she heard someone eating.
“Mrs. Cake? Are you up early too?”
Whoever it was kept eating.
“Mr. Cake? Are you having that cake-gobbling-party-that-I-keep-asking-for-but-you-keep-on-saying-no without me?”
She went through the kitchen to the counter in the front, when a horrific sight met her eyes. A giant, yellow monster with a white shirt and blue pants was eating the store’s cakes! As it swallowed the rest of an entire four-layer double chocolate cake, it turned around to look at Pinkie with humongous, white, bug-like eyes. Pinkie Pie screamed.
“AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! MONSTER!!!”
Then the monster screamed just as loud.
“MONSTER?! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!”
Soon both creatures were running and galloping around; emitting high, girlish screams. The racket woke the Cakes, who came quickly onto the scene. While in truth, both Pinkie and the beast were running around in circles, to the Cakes, it looked like Pinkie was being chased by a terrible yellow beast. They ran out of the store to get Ponyville’s top expert on never-before-seen creatures, among other numerous subjects.
Twilight Sparkle was reading a fascinating essay on economics by Silver Smith over her morning oats when the Cakes burst in unexpectedly.
“Mr. and Mrs. Cake!” exclaimed Twilight. “What’s wrong? You two look like you’ve been chased by an Ursa Major for a few miles!”
“Not quite,” said Cup Cake. “Twilight, you’ve got to get over to Sugarcube Corner! Pinkie’s being chased by some big, yellow monster!”
“We’ve never seen something like it before!” said Carrot Cake. “Celestia knows what sort of danger Pinkie’s in right now!”
“I’m on it!” said Twilight.
She ran to the door, and then stopped.
“Could you two get the rest of the girls and tell them to get to Sugarcube Corner as quickly as possible?”
“Whatever you say, Twilight!” said Cup Cake.
The three Equestrians exited the library, all running in different directions.
Twilight galloped at top speed while trying to figure out what could be attacking Pinkie.
“It couldn’t be a dragon,” she thought. “Why would they single out and attack one pony? A manticore’s coat is yellow-ish, maybe more brown though. No, if it had been anything like those, the cakes would have identified it by species. But what could it be?”
As the building came into sight, she heard screams getting steadily louder and louder as she drew near. She saw several ponies surrounding it, unable to draw especially close due to fear.
Twilight charged up to the door, busted it open, and observed what was inside. Her jaw dropped.
Two organisms were running haphazardly around the bakery, screaming as though their lives depended on it. One was Pinkie Pie. The other, for lack of a better word, wasn't. It had two legs, and two arms with hands, like a minotaur. The similarities with the familiar Tauran race ended there, however. It was completely hairless, except around what appeared to be a mouth. It had smooth, yellow skin and great white eyes with dots for what seemed to be pupils. Most perplexing of all, it was wearing a white shirt, blue pants, and two grey-black shoes on its hind legs (Well, only legs, that is). It wasn't often that Twilight saw something that she hadn't seen illustrated or described in a book. It took three full minutes before she finally snapped out of her shock and went to talk to the hysterical Pinkie Pie.
“Pinkie! What is that thing? Did it attack you?” asked Twilight.
Pinkie abruptly stopped screaming. “Oh, I don’t know what that weird thing is. I was sort of surprised when I saw it, so I screamed and I was like ‘AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! MONSTER!!!’” the last part which she screamed at the top of her lungs, to Twilight’s surprise and frustration. “Then I kept screaming and running around ‘cause it was so fun, like I was in a haunted house or something!”
Twilight facehoofed. “Pinkie, have you ever heard of the Colt Who Cried Wolf?”
Pinkie giggled. “It’s not a wolf, silly! In fact, I don’t even know what it is! What is it?”
“Well…”
“Ooh! Is it a giant yellow monkey from another planet?!”
“I don’t know! It shouldn't exist! It’s not in any book I've ever read!”
Suddenly, four young mares charged through the door. The rest of their friends had arrived.
“I came as fast as I…” began Rarity. Then she and the others stared at the yellow monster. She gasped. Fluttershy eeped. Both Rainbow Dash’s and Applejack’s mouths dropped.
“What in tarnation…” started Applejack.
“WHAT… IS… THAT?” said Rainbow Dash.
Meanwhile, the ape-like monster continued to scream and run around in circles.
Homer Simpson is pure win!!!!!!!
More Homer More Homer!
I like this! It's smooth, it's fun, it sounds like the Simpsons, for real!
Good job, keep it up!
What is the strange, yellow, apelike creature?
It's a kwyjibo, a big, dumb, balding North American ape with no chin...and a short temper.
The kwyjibo is an omnivore, however, it's favorite food items are pork chops, donuts, and beer.
Warning: The kwyjibo is known to attack when provoked, usually strangling its target when enraged.
Homer better not meet Donut Joe. It will be the end of that pony.
3360284
You misunderstand, Donut salesmen are the only people on the planet Homer would never harm in any shape or form...unless they refused to sell him a donut.
He's more likely to declare Donut Joe his Bestest Friend For Life Who Isn't Barney.
Used to fanfiction.net so,
SO...
MANY...
COMMENTS!
I LOVE YOU GUYS!
LOL
Very true to the series.
3361592 How about a fic where Moe Szyslak ends up in Equestria following one of his annual holiday suicide attempts?
3360284
Or the beginning of an early retirement.
3360284 you mean donuts
The only complaint I have is that this funnier that the current series.
No really:. I love classic homer; dim-witted, lazy, and a short attention span. So far not bad and has much room for improvements. So keep it up.
Can't wait when Homer has his first Pinkie Pie party.
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/334/547/010.gif
3362140 He attacks Pony Joe's Donut shop
When does he get to see Twilight's dad? It'll be the clash of Mr. Sparkles
Im having a good day so far, i read a random fanfic about orochimaru getting his arse handed to him by super cow, and now this.
3361051 Since you're a recent migrant from fanfiction.net, let me be the first to welcome you to FiMFiction.net!
Great story too, there hasn't been a decent Simpsons crossover, that I've seen at least. However, I recommend that you try to change up the writing style a bit, since right now you tend to repeat 'he/she said' a lot.
Either way, I'll keep an eye on this.
~Gherkin, the self-proclaimed Crossover Guy
You have created a heavenly piece of art... I f*cking love you, man...
3363674 I want a link to that. now.
In honour of this momentous fic, I present thee with the firstest episode of The Simpsons I could find, season two episode nineteen. http://www.cartoon-world.tv/the-simpsons-season-2-episode-19/
3364117
Thank you.
I love those moments when Homer does good. The hilarious screw-ups make them all the more wonderful. We might see those things in this story...
Love Dustin Hoffman's guest performance, too.
3364283 'Tis okay, I'm bored at four am, so Imma watch fairy tail and then go to sleep.
I find it strange that I have never seen a Simpsons crossover before, but I feel like it should have been done before
3364318
The Simpsons have done everything. The MLP fandom have done every crossover and ship. Yet they have never done each other....
HAHAHA! I love it!
This is what they probably see homer as.
I'm expecting some sort of fun happening with , and Homer.
I'm guessing that Rainbow's gonna hurt Homer and Homer's gonna think that RD's like Bart and strangle her.
3360608 your going to spin us for fun?
3364283
it feels like the simpsons movie for some reason I enjoyed that so no complaints.
Okay. You've caught my attention...
3364283 Top tip: use the reply button, at the top right of a comment, to reply to it. Don't just type ">>*username*", as the user will not be notified unless you actually use the reply button.
MOAR ive been waiting my whole life for this
3363980 LOL heres the link u wanted . doesnt seem to be linkin properly so just copy paste it
Good job at portraying homer.
3366304 God bless you... that was the most satisfying beat-down of Orochimaru I've ever seen... and yet he's one of my favorite mad scientists, but then again, also one of my least-liked anime villains because he technically started the ENDLESS rivalry between Sasuke and Naruto... and because of him, there's endless Ho-Yay about the poor guys...
3364318 There is one other its called Bart and Scoots
I liked the prequel to "Hail to the Chimp" best franchise ever.
It could be be worse, at least Homer is a mostly harmless moron, unless beer, celebrities, firearms, large farming equipment and fire are involved.
I wonder if Lisa will ever get to see Equestria. I'd imagine she'd be quite happy to visit.
buddy, you are off to a great start. I was wondering, I was planning to write my own crossover with the simpsons. I need to know how to capture the mood of the simpsons as well as you have. How did you do it?
Celestia H. Christ, everybody seems to love this. I hope I can keep this up, it's only been two chapters, with no interaction between Homer and the Equestrians yet. I really hope I keep the level of quality. I'm really just making stuff up as I go along, with ideas bouncing around my head that I sometimes let out.
To everyone wanting to see certain Equestrians, I hope to include several recurring characters, but again, just spitting it out as I go along.
The big question is other Simpsons characters. When I first conceived this, I only figured for Homer, but with all the ideas bouncing around, I have no idea where to go right now.
Possibilities:
1. Just Homer
2. Other Characters Later in story
3. Other Characters in sequel(s?)
3371118
How? I have no clue. I typed as I went along with an idea of where it was going.
3368580
I know! I totally remembered that when I was writing the first chapter!
At some point Frank Grimes should make an appearence. Maybe this time he's driven insane by Pinkie Pie. Love this story so far. Really has the feel of the classic Simpsons episodes.
3371653 Just Homer please. Too many would spoil it.
T-t-this fanfic... this... fanfic... This fanfic is...!
evilspeculator.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/free-MrBurnsExcellent.gif
Seriously, it's great! You got the Simpsons humor perfectly, and with Homer's antics and Pinkie's randomness together... well, Equestria's days are numbered . Also, running around so much can't be good for Homer and his heart problems....
3371653 You should have Pinkie and Dash make an interdimensional prank call to Moe.
3371896 Yeah LOL
Homer: Hello Grimy
Grimes: Oh Great Its Simpson
3371896
I have actually considered a writing a story where after being killed by grabbing wires, Frank Grimes somehow wakes up in Ponyville. If you could write the story about that, I wouldn't mind.
3460212
Nah, I've got too many stories I'm working on right now to add another. You go ahead with it if you want. I'd definitely read it.
3377066
Wait, Homer running? I imagined him at a somewhat fast stride. Homer running would defy the vary laws of physics, and trust me, I tried to see if it would work. In short, he cant run.
I'd like to post this comment as a shoutout to Marcia Wallace, who died October 25th at the age of the 70. You will be remembered for voicing Mrs. Krabappel, one of many Simpsons characters, but one through your talent, was able to find a place in our hearts.
RIP Marcia Wallace: (1942-2013)