and with that... everything

by The Anonymous Writer

Chapter Three: Always

Chapter Three: Always

I'd like to say that the meal ended on a high note; but that would be something of a lie. Twilight and I had our words, she had her cry, and I accepted my fate. Rainbow Dash came in, and we did our best to pick up with the meal where it had started to go south, but it was pretty much already in shambles, and my stomach was growing into tighter and tighter knots.

I sat in the parlor waiting while Rainbow Dash and Twilight finished clearing away the meal, and the dishes, and as I sat there to the sounds of clinking porcelain and silverware, I watched the little dragon, Spike, as he sat across from me, and fiddled with his hands. I've never been able to really figure out what goes on in that little dragon head of his. I only know that he's nice enough, I suppose.

When Twilight eventually emerged from the kitchen, I was already dozing on the couch. I don't know how they managed it, but between the two of them, Rainbow Dash and Twilight hoisted me up to Twilight's bed, and tucked me in. I woke up sometime in the night, and felt their warmth beside me. Twilight was snoring softly in my left ear, and Rainbow Dash was drooling on my shirt just below the right shoulder. Gross.

Moving her would be a mistake. She had nasty reflexes in her sleep, and whenever anyone touched or bothered her wings, she would get a type of knee-jerk reaction to it. The last thing I wanted was a hoof planted in my stomach, or in my nuts.

Opting out of trying to move her mouth away, I settled for just resting my hand on the side of her face, and giving her a gentle caress. It wouldn't be long and I'd either never have them again, or learn that dreams were reality. Their warmth was real enough to me. I couldn't deny that I felt it, but my mind could be just making me react to things that my brain was fabricating.

"Hmm, Tommy?"

Twilight was yawning, and shuffling herself under the blankets, I pretended to be asleep while I watched her, keeping my eyelids barely closed.

"Tommy, are you awake?" I could feel her hooves under the blanket moving to my chest. "Guess not."

When she put her arms around me and squeezed me, I felt as if my heart were breaking. Then, as if to send me over the edge, I heard her sniffling, and felt my chest shaking.

Abandoning my pretend sleep, I brought my left arm up and wrapped it around her shoulders. "Hey," I said. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing," she whispered. "It's nothing. Go back to sleep, I'm sorry that I disturbed you."

"Are you sure," I said, slowly inching myself away from Rainbow's muzzle.
I could feel her head moving, nodding. "I'm just a little worried."
I wanted to comfort her, but there was only so much that I could do for her. I wanted to reassure her in some way, but I knew that anything that I told her would sound like some kind of lame excuse, or me just trying to pacify her in some way. There was really nothing that I could do for her, except let her have her cry.

* * * * *

Mornings are usually not my thing. I’m not one of those people that’s up and at-‘em by first light, or dressed in my finest and looking to seize the day. Nope, I’m a premium slouch. I like sleeping in, and praying that when I do finally get up, it’s gone from morning to afternoon, and that I didn’t have to bear witness to it.

It didn’t come as any huge shock that Twilight and Rainbow were both gone. They were each responsible for things, and were already out and about.

Running my hand over the spot in Twilight’s bed where they slept, I wished secretly that they were still with me. I wanted to spend as much time together as possible.

As it turned out, there was a note from Rainbow Dash on the counter in the kitchen. It was written in her usual, hasty, sloppy manner, and informed me rather straight forwardly that there were some things in Cloudsdale that needed attending, but since we were all going out later, she would meet up with me then back at my place.

If I knew Twilight—and I did—she was probably getting the others together, and working on getting this day started. I knew it was supposed to be my day, but deep down, I knew that it was just as much for Twilight and the others as it was for me.

If the time came and I took the medicine, and they disappeared, would they even know it? Would it be something that they would be conscious of?

I pretended real well that I had all the answers in front of them, but in the end, I was a terrified mess of emotion and confusion.

There were only so many things that I could do in Ponyville, and, while I really wanted to spend as much time with my friends as I could; there was a small part of me that wanted to acclimate to the idea of the unknown. So after I'd given Twilight's bed a brisk straightening, I went back to the portal, and made my way into my shower. Everything was just as I had left it the day before, and for the first time in several days, I had my apartment to myself. There had usually been at least one pony with me at all times it seemed. Or for the majority of it, anyway. For a few hours I had time to rouse up, caffeine up, and slap some color into my cheeks, without being under the ever-watchful eye of Doctor Sparkle MD.

The way I was fumbling through the place, it was as though I'd been gone for weeks. Without realizing it, I found myself wandering around the inside of my home and examining all the things in it. Sad to say, it seemed lifeless and empty. As though a huge chunk of energy had been scooped out of the middle. It also seemed very pony-free.

Nothing in Rainbow Dash’s note had said when she or the others would be over, so I figured it was time to make the tough march, and go get my prescription filled. Come hell or high water, I had already promised Twilight that I would take the damn medicine. There was no backing out, even though every fiber of my being wanted to run back to Ponyville, and huddle in the corner of Sweet Apple Acres.

On my way back through the living room, I passed a series of picture frames on the wall. They were each of me, standing in various poses, or making silly faces.

I felt an overwhelming sense of loss while looking at them, and I was reminded of how much I missed my brother. If there were anyone on the planet that would've been able to help me, it would have been him. He’d either slap me in the forehead and tell me to quit being a pussy, or he’d grab me hard on the shoulders and tell me that life is too damn short to spend it worrying on petty bullshit.

Too bad Twilight couldn't read my thoughts. She'd be pissed at all the times I said "bullshit" in my head.

* * * * *

Still unsure how long it was going to take Twilight and the others to make it to my place, I decided that it would be best to speed up the medication process.

Going to the phone, I pick it up and dial the number for the local pharmacy. It was surprisingly painless—getting one’s medication. I figured it would require some sort of complete medical history rundown, or at best, some kind of evaluation. But, in the end, I was told that my prescription would be ready in a few hours.

Hanging up, I felt a huge, sudden, tension begin building in my shoulders. I could sense the approaching and impending doom coming closer with each passing tick of the clock, and I felt like an inmate waiting on death row; knowing that my time was almost up, soon going to be singing with the angels, or dancing with the devils.

If it was going to be my last meal, then for my last breakfast, I opted for cereal. Generic store brand corn flakes. Just the right amount of extra sugar, and the right amount of milk. No elaborate or fancy meals here. Simple was the only way to go when it came time to face the music.

I knew I wasn’t fooling myself. I wasn’t facing a firing squad. I wasn’t going to die. I was either going to wake up from a dream and find myself ponyless for the rest of my life, or I was going to take the medicine, and they would still be there… bounding and bouncing along in my life like the magic that they seemed to radiate. I simply had no way of knowing which prize in the bottom of life’s box I was going to get.

Once the cereal was eaten, and I had deposited the bowl and spoon in the sink for later, I plopped down on the couch and flipped through all the channels on the TV.

It’s like they always say, “Three hundred channels, and not a damn thing on!”

What I really wanted to do was spend my time with my friends; I had what was left of the day to be with them, and here I was, slouching on the sofa and playing flip with the remote control.

Well, the fuck with that!

It was time for some affirmative action, and I knew just what needed to be done.

For starters, it was time for me to change clothes, and get my ass in some kind of gear. So, I headed into my bedroom, jumped into my best non-torn denim jeans and Doctor Who long-sleeve, then donned my prized DBZ baseball cap, with the classic, “Over 9000” stitched in.

After a healthy splash of cologne, and a few close inspections of my reflection in the mirror, I made my way into the kitchen and left Rainbow Dash a message in return. I might have mentioned in the note that I was going to get the medicine, but the truth was, I had a far more interesting and fun agenda. This dour depressed shit was for the birds, and I wasn’t growing feathers any time soon.

On my way out, I remembered a picture. It was taken a few years back, when I had visited the beach. I was in the picture, smiling and holding up two fingers behind Trevor Schrader’s head.

That was the last summer that the five of us had spent together. High school pals, out to take on the world.
Little did we know that the world had different plans for each of us.

For the life of me, I can’t recall what became of the photo. Lost, no doubt in the endless shuffle of the day by day.

As I made my way out, I couldn’t help but wonder if my memories of my Ponyville friends would do the same. If they too would become a lost collection to time.

* * * * *

The pharmacy was unusually crowded, and after several minutes of standing around, or browsing the same shelves, I decided to sit and wait my turn like a good customer.

Next to me on the hard, uncomfortable wooden bench, was an elderly man, insistent on coughing up whatever was in his lungs without the courtesy of a handkerchief, or the back of his hand.

A small fleeting thought was that maybe I could contract whatever ailment the geezer next to me had, then I could at least post-pone the anti-psychotic meds for a bit. It makes perfect sense that there would be some sort of drug interaction problems with DayQuil and whatever pony evaporation pills they'd give me.

In a small fleeting moment of stupidity, I turned my head, looking for Twilight; wanting to share the moment, and the slight silliness, but, she wasn’t there. She was gone, and, for the first time since I’d walked out of the last doctor’s office, I knew what it would feel like to have her missing from my life.

Depression is a bitch. Then again, so is self-pity. I doubt very much that the two are mutually exclusive; but man, let me tell you… when they tag team someone, it hurts a lot.

When the pharmacist hands me my package, he motions for me to step to the left of the counter; there is a small note attached to the top of the bag that reads, “Consultation.”

“Just be a moment,” I’m told.

After a small rousing round of count the crap on the counter, which came to a sum of thirty-eight, a middle-aged man with lots of grey hair walks up, and takes the bag from my hand. He gives the label a brief once over, and levels his gaze at me with what I'm sure is going to be one of those father to son style lectures.

"Make sure you take one tablet in the morning, with food. Take the second after your evening meal, or just before bed, whichever you choose, so long as you take them the same time everyday. You may experience a slight sedative effect, in which case, you should schedule your first pill several hours before operating any motor vehicles or machinery."

"Wow," I said, glancing down at the package. "You guys really want to dope me up good."

There wasn't any change in the pharmacists demeanor. He followed my gaze, and said, "This prescription is maximum strength. If you begin to develop any tremors, high anxiety, or eye spasms, speech problems, contact your doctor immediately. Got all that?"

It was a mildly terrifying thought—the notion that medication that is designed to help a person could also damage them so thoroughly. Granted, I'm sure that people want to be cured from whatever it is that ails them, but I'm sure they don't want a whole grocery-list of shit falling off of them in the process.

The only thing I could do was nod my head slowly. There wasn't any sort of deep connection between the pharmacist and myself. He had no reason to show more than cursory concern; his job wasn't that elaborate.

In the end, I walked out of the pharmacy, bag in hand, wishing to God that I'd just lied to Twilight. That somehow, I could have convinced her that everything was all right.

On the way back to my apartment, I stopped at the closest everything-a-buck store, and grabbed one of the items on my mental list. It was a small thing, but then, small things to me were really large and grand when compared to what waited around unknown corners and bends.

* * * * *

The apartment seemed empty when I got back, and for a moment, I stood in the doorway, contemplating that first footstep that would take me inside. I know, I know... I felt like the biggest advocate of indecision; but you have to understand the new found weight that was crushing down on my shoulders.

I took a breath, straightened my back, and entered my domicile. Several loud cracks and bursts of noise suddenly engulfed me, and I felt my eyes begin to sting from the sudden lights blazing to life around me.

About the same time I felt the streamers and confetti hit me, I heard the unison chorus of all my pony friends cheering and calling out my name. I have to admit, it was a good feeling.

Clearing the moisture from my eyes, I rubbed them a few times, still smiling as Twilight and Rainbow Dash rushed up to me, to give me hugs. Pinkie Pie was bouncing off of the furniture, and steadily blowing on her noise maker, while I noticed that the others were just gathered near the center of the living room watching and smiling.

"Welcome back," Twilight said. "Were you surprised?"

"You bet I was," I told her, reaching down and giving her neck and gentle rub. "I didn't expect any of this."

"Ooh, ooh! It was soooo my idea," Pinkie said, still bouncing. "I wanted to bring the party cannon, but they told me not to."

"Well, I'm still thrilled," I told her. "Party cannon or no party cannon."

While I was being hugged and pulled on by Pinkie, Rarity motioned for me to look behind her at the cake that they pitched in for. It wasn't a large cake, but it was a nice one. I didn't think to ask them how in the hell they managed to get it through the damn shower portal in one piece.

"There's punch, if you want, or you can have one of those beers you seem so fond of," she told me. "Oh, what's that?"

Following her gaze, I looked down at the two small sacks in my hands. I wanted to say that they were nothing, but one look at my face, and I think she knew that in there somewhere was the accursed medication. I offered her a wry smile, and she took the hint, jerking her head toward Applejack, and shoving on her.

"I was gonna go say my howdy-do's," she fussed, making her way slowly to me.

"Hey, Applejack," I said, reaching down and patting her on her neck. "How's tricks?"

"Fine," she said, staring at the bags. "So, what'cha got in there?"

Letting out a short sigh, I presented them to her. "One is my medicine, and the other is a present."

I thought for a second that the entire universe ceased to move. Instantly all my pony friends came to a screeching halt. And by that I mean, literally. Pinkie was screeching, as though she were putting the brakes on something, and finally settled down when she noticed the unified hush.

"What's the present?" Rainbow asked, coming up to me and sticking her nose inches from the sack.

"I'll show you in a minute," I told her while offering her a gentle push. "First things first. We have cake."

"YAY! CAKE!" Pinkie yelled, then launched herself off the back of the couch in a series of cartwheels.

"What do you want to do today, Tommy?"

Looking behind me, I noticed that Twilight was calmly resting on her rump on the floor. "What do you mean? I thought we were going to go out and celebrate. Spend the whole day together."

"I know that, but I mean... what do you want to do with all of us?"

"Honestly?

"Honestly."

"I want to just enjoy being with you guys for as long as I can." Giving it some thought, I said. "How about we spend the day here, playing games, singing karaoke, and eating cake until we're stupid with sugar."

"I want to be stupid with sugar!" Pinkie yelled, waving her hoof in the air.

"Pinkie, you are walking right into a bad joke," Applejack cautioned. "Put yer hoof down!"

"What in the heck is carry-okie?" Rainbow Dash asked, looking between her friends for an answer.

"You're going to love it," I said.

Looking back at Twilight, I smiled.

* * * * *

Evening came early. I suppose it does when you get caught up in fun and games. Everything from Twister to Cards Against Humanity were set out, and yes... we all took turns singing karaoke. I think the only one that didn't find our hoots and cheers fun was Rarity, as she tried to sing A Whole New World from the Disney movie Aladdin.

The first to collapse from the fun was Pinkie. Even a fun machine of her caliber could only handle so much octane before the engine busted, and after her was Fluttershy. They were crashed on the couch in the living room while the rest of us made our way to the kitchen, and sat around my table, eying the final bag.

"Well, this is it," I said allowing my eyes to roam up to the clock. "It's time for me to take this."

"Should we go get Pinkie and Fluttershy up?" Twilight asked.

"No. Just let them sleep," I said. "If I had to look at their big sad eyes, I'd chicken out and throw these pills in the trash."

I could see that Rainbow Dash was upset. Her arms were folded, and she was slouched in her chair. If her looks could kill, the bag would have had a hole in it the size of the fucking moon.

Opening the bottle, I extracted the pills, and set them on the table. "Here's to my friends," I said, lifting up my glass of water. "Good times, and good health."

It was a stupid speech. I know that. But I was still trying to keep the mood from growing too somber.

Tossing the pills in my mouth, I brought the glass of water up, and placed it against my bottom lip. I watched Twilight from the corner of my eye. If she was going to stop me, she didn't make a move to, and I knew that it was okay. She was at peace with what ever outcome would come.

Swallowing the pills down, I sat the glass back on the table, and regarded each of my friends. Rarity was doing her best to keep a strong front. I knew she wanted to cry.

Applejack had her lips pursed together, staring at the glass as though she wanted to break it against the wall.

Twilight was holding my gaze, offering me a thin smile of encouragement. I know I needed it.

The real heart breaker was Rainbow Dash. She wouldn't look at me. She had her face turned away slightly, staring at the empty space in the kitchen, as a streak of moisture ran down the side of her face.

"Hey," I said, slowly rising from my chair. "How about we all pile up in the living room on some blankets? We can watch movies and eat popcorn until we fall asleep."

"That sounds like a fine idea," Twilight said.

And like that... the day was over.

As the end credits of 500 Days of Summer crawled, I eased myself down further in the pile of ponies. Twilight was resting against my shoulder, and Applejack and Rainbow Dash were laying across my legs and mid section.

Fishing the remote control out, I made sure not to wake any of them, and silently switched off the TV.

"Tommy?"

"Yeah, Twilight?"

"If... if tomorrow comes, and we aren't here... you'll remember us won't you?"

Leaning over and gently placing my lips against the top of her nose, I said, "Always."

~ * ~

Author's Note:

Yes! It's alive!

After a year of hiatus, the story lives again.

A huge thank you to everyone that stuck by this. And, a huge thank you to Davidism for the much needed assistance with reviving this story.

Comments

[redsquirrel456]

This is one of the few HiE-type stories that don't send me into a frothing rage.

I quite like it, and I'm glad to see it'll get some closure. You have a nice, reserved prose that doesn't feel like it veers into the overdone theatrics of usual human first person characters.

Also, I listened to this today and it reminded me of the story.

[Pearple Prose]

Finally got to around to reading this chapter.

You have great prose, which is the main reason why I like this story so much - usually I'm in the same boat as 5303818 here regarding HiE stories. Looking forward to seeing where this goes :D

[Tome Turner]

That cliffhanger tho.