This story is a sequel to Stranded in a Lost World
Team TARDIS takes a break from adventuring, and the Doctor decides to grant destination requests. Derpy chooses a remote alien beach first, then Lyra votes to visit a space station far into the future. Beneath the glittering streets and markets of the futuristic city in space lies one of the Doctor's oldest enemies trying to recover from the brink of destruction.
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A blue Doctor on the cover? Hm, that is new.
3207037
It's the Ninth Doctor. Played IRL by Christopher Eccleston
the first part of the quote doesn't seem to make sense. i think you might have typed "once" while you might have meant "one."
slight typo here. hanger instead of hanga.
bet instead of be?
3221131>>3220999
Fix'd and fix'd
3222853
rightio then man. just thought i should help when i saw the stuff.
Hmm. I'm aware that I may sound overly critical when I really have no right to be, and I'm sorry for that, but compared to the previous stories, this one felt pretty weak to me.
What was up with the metallic spider? I'm sure it must be obvious to Doctor Who fans, but to me, it didn't seem to serve any purpose other than to clue the Doctor in about the presence of Cyberponies.
Some lousy security they must have in the future; unable to find a room during the course of a whole month that's so "well hidden" that other ponies constantly stumble upon it by accident.
For that matter, if the Cyberponies kept getting surprised by ponies just casually walking into their hideout, they clearly didn't understand the concept of "hiding".
And Lyra's (presumably) epic tale about how she single-hoovedly prevented the entire space station from exploding goes untold in favor of a recap of events we already read about just a few paragraphs earlier. There's just no love for heroic greenish unicorns, it seems.
3230970
Thanks for letting me know. I tried going back in and making a few minor edits to address your points, and I'll keep them in mind for the next time I write a story. (Probably gonna be awhile, as I'm starting classes, but I'm working on it!)
BTW, for those who haven't read my blog post yet, the next story is going to be a multi-Doctor one! Here's a bit of a teaser.
3240027
Hey, no problem. I'm just glad my criticism didn't annoy you (I hope) and I like the improvements.
3240501
I'm always glad to hear constructive criticism, and I appreciate it. It's how I improve at this stuff.