Pony POV: Discorded Ponies Side Story
(Optional Canon)
Discordance: Hatred
by Jonathan “KnightMysterio” Spires
The Pony POV was originally created by Alex Warlorn. Story created with the original author's permission. All characters copyrighted to their original owners and used without permission for non-profit amusement reasons. Comments, compliments, and constructive criticism actively encouraged.
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Ponyville...
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It's a pleasure to meet you, everypony! My name is Derpy Hooves, but I generally prefer the nickname Ditzy Doo. Neither are very flattering, I know, but Ditzy just sounds nicer to me. But anyway, that doesn't matter. I always like meeting new people! I'd offer you a muffin, but I'm kind of on the job now, so I can't hang around long.
My job? I'm a mailmare! One of the premier delivery-ponies in Ponyville. It's a hard job, but for my girls, it's more than worth it.
Heheh, thank you. I'm older than I look, I know. But I'm actually a mother of two wonderful daughters whom I wouldn't trade for anything in the world.
...Yes, I'm aware I talk slowly, and sometimes mess up what I say, and that I am a bit... clumsy. And my eyes have always been like this. That doesn't mean I'm any less capable of being a mother.
...Can we please not talk about that? I've had enough problems with Foal Protective Services doubting my ability to be a mother to Sparkler and Dinky.
Thank you. Now, I really do have to get going. I have to complete my route before sundown.
Or... sunrise?
Sundown again?
What the hay?!
Pink clouds float through the sky, pouring chocolate milk over everything they pass over. I try flying up to one and find out that it's made of cotton candy. As I watch, the ground starts developing a checkerboard look to it. I see a swarm of rabbits with long, deer-like legs run by.
And then things get REALLY weird.
I see ponies start undergoing strange and bizarre transformations, or just outright going mad. I saw the mayor turn into a talking rock. I see Carrot Top with an axe attacking anything that even looks remotely green. I see Lyra, laughing and crazy, trying to eat a living candy that looks like her friend Bon Bon. I see... Oh dear Celestia no... I see Sparkler turn into a dancing statue of amethyst.
There's a sharp, stabbing pain in my heart as I see my eldest daughter turned into a caricature of herself. And then it hits me...
Dinky. I need to get to Dinky.
I land and start to gallop home, only for the roads to turn to soap beneath me, causing me to trip. When I pick myself up, bubbles, the same kind that comprise my Cutie Mark, form a vortex around me, obscuring everything else. Several of the bubbles take the form of a face that looks like a weird cross between a dragon and a pony.
I grin weakly, unsure of what to think. “...Hi?”
“Most interesting,” said the voice, an amused expression on its face, “Derpy Hooves, dedicated mailmare, loving mother, friend to everyone.”
I blush. “Well, I try to be.”
“So it really doesn't bother you when they make fun of you?” said the bubble creature.
I shake my head, wondering where the bubble thing was going with this. “I try not to let it, no.”
The bubble-thing seemed fascinated. “It doesn't bother you that they call you retarded?”
I cringe. “No, it doesn't. Because I'm not,” I say.
“But your eyes are all goofy. And forgive me for saying so, ma'am, you do seem a little... slow,” the bubble thing said. “Can you really blame them for thinking that?”
I gritted my teeth, trying to smile. This was preventing me from getting to Dinky. I had to get him out of the way. Plus it was bringing up some memories I didn't really want to think about. “They just don't know me, is all,” I say. “Everypony makes mistakes.”
“This is quite fascinating,” the bubble creature said. “You mean it really doesn't bother you that some people think you kidnapped your two children because you're too stupid to have children of your own?
I take a deep breath, trying not to yell. It was true, that I had been accused of that. And it hurt. Hurt worse than anything I had ever heard before.
“It's... fine. No one's taunted me about that in a while, so it doesn't matter anymore,” I manage to say.
“You really don't care that everypony believes you to be an unfit mother? That you're just a dumb, retarded fool who can't do anything right?” the bubble creature continued.
“I don't...” I stammered, just wanting him to shut up and go away. All he was doing was dredging up painful memories. “I don't, okay?”
“Doesn't it burn you that they think so little of you? With all the hard work that you do for these ingrate Equestrians, that they all consider you to be a mental defective?”
“Stop it,” I pleaded. I didn't want to think about this.
“Isn't it like a stab in the heart, every time they suggest that your girls might be better off with someone else?”
“SHUT UP!” I scream, unable to take it anymore. “What do you know?! What do ANY OF THEM KNOW!?” Why was he doing this? Why was the bubble thing bringing back all these horrible memories? What did he WANT from me?!
“Don't you hate them for making you feel like you aren't worth anything?” asked the bubble thing.
“YES!!” I scream. “YES!! I HATE THEM!!”
And there it is. All the old wounds torn open again. All the old anger and frustration brought to the surface once more. Are you happy now, you stupid bubble thing?
“Yes, actually,” the bubble thing said, as if answering my thoughts. I jump, startled. And then the thing's eyes start to glow, swirling with a colorful light. Everything becomes fuzzy, all my thoughts becoming confused. I can't focus, I... my head... help me...
“I am helping you, my dear Derpy. Hold onto that hate. Embrace it. And nopony will ever hurt you again.”
I barely hear what the bubble thing said. My brain is literally going in ninety directions at once. I feel something tearing away at me, being painfully ripped away...
...but even as it does, my thoughts start to clear. In fact... In fact I've never thought this clearly before in my life.
The bubbles all pop, and I look out at all the chaos that's overtaking Ponyville.
Suddenly, it doesn't seem all that important.
I look down at myself in the soapy roads. My coat had faded to a dull white, and my hair was now gray.
Meh, whatever. I was thinking about dying my hair anyway. Always hated the 'dumb blonde' look. And even better, my eyes aren't permanently crossed anymore.
Now nopony can make fun of me for the way I look.
Not if they don't want their damn jaws broken.
Bastards.
I look over at Lyra trying to eat a desperately struggling Bon Bon. Some part of me knows that I should be worried about this...
...but as I watch, I feel a cold fury coming over me. What had she ever done for me? Had she ever stood up for me? Had she ever supported me when I needed comforting? NO! She hadn't. So forget her.
“Hey Lyra!” I call out to the addled mint-green pony. She turns to me, her eyes filled with madness. I grin wickedly. “If you use a power drill on the candy thing there, you can suck the cream right out!”
The look of sheer horror Bon Bon gives me feels me with tremendous satisfaction. Lyra brightens and says what I GUESS was a thank you. Her voice sounded like a badly out of tune harp. She dragged Bon Bon inside, presumably to look for the power drill I mentioned.
I snickered. The sudden image of Lyra draining that miserable old nag Bon Bon dry popped into my head. It was hilarious. And all that she deserved.
I turned to leave for home, and slip on the soap again. Cursing, I take to the air, looking over the town that had been my home for years going to pony Hell in a hoofbasket.
And I feel nothing.
Nothing but contempt.
Nothing but HATE.
Hate for every pony who had ever made fun of me, who had ever questioned my ability to be a mother. Hate for every pony who had done NOTHING to support me in my hour of need. None of them helped me, so why should I help them?
Hate.
It was a strangely liberating feeling.
I see Sparkler, a dancing amethyst statue. And to my surprise, I feel myself starting to hate her. But the more I think about it, the more hating her makes perfect sense.
When had she ever supported me beyond token well-wishes while I was fighting to keep Dinky? What had the useless little brat ever done to show me how much she cared?
Bah. Forget her.
I slowly glide home, any sense of urgency gone. I contemplate this new state of mind... this feeling of 'hate.' I expected to be angrier, honestly. But instead, there's just this... strangely comforting coldness. Like an iron wall around my heart that nothing can pierce through. I feel... unstoppable.
Heh. Derpy the Unstoppable.
...I need a new name. I hate the name Derpy. Ditzy isn't that much better.
Seriously, what sort of parent names their child 'Derpy?' Bastards.
Meh, I'll think of a new name later. I have all the time in the world now.
I finally arrive home and go inside. I call out to Dinky... and to my surprise, she actually flies in, grinning and excited.
“Mama! Mama, isn't it wonderful? This nice snakey man turned me into a pegasus like you! Now we can fly together, Mama!” she said.
My daughter. Turned into a pegasus.
…
Is this some kind of stupid JOKE!?
I was fine with her being a unicorn! But no, she has to go and turn into a pegasus! Was my own love for her not enough!? DAMN HER!!
“As if anyone would want to fly with a little runt like you,” I snap. I see her flinch, as if I slapped her. Good. How dare she insult me like this?
“Mama?” she said. The hate inside me flares, and I slap her, sending her crashing into a chair.
“Shut up,” I snarl, looming over her. I feel something inside me burning, boiling. It feels good. “Just shut up! Don't ever call me that!! I'm not your mother!”
“Wha... Mama?” Dinky says. I slap her once more. I feel a cold grin coming to my face as I glare at her, hatred for the ungrateful little thing who thought she needed to change, who accepted help from a stranger even though I've always told her to be careful of them. Brat.
“That's right, you putrid little runt,” I say. “Even if you're a pegasus now, that doesn't mean you're my daughter. I adopted you. Sparkler is my real daughter, NOT YOU, you pathetic, worthless little thing.”
Tears were streaming down Dinky's face. Her expression looks like I was tearing her apart. GOOD. “Mama...” she sobbed again. I struck her even harder.
“SHUT UP! Stop calling me that! You have no mother!” I said, laughing cruelly. “I adopted you after I found you abandoned in a dumpster like the worthless trash you are. That was a mistake on my part. I never should have taken you in. I wish you had DIED in that dumpster!”
A lie of course. But no need for the worthless little brat to know that. Better to let her suffer.
“You're NOTHING! You'll never be my child. I don't know why I deluded myself into thinking you would be,” I say, my satisfied grin growing wider and wider the more she cried. “You're garbage. Worthless, insignificant garbage. Do the world a favor, runt, and kill yourself.”
The shock, the pain in her eyes when I say that... oooh, it feels almost as good as sex. And seeing her colors start to drain away? Icing on the exquisitely delicious cake.
Heh. Maybe the little runt WOULD kill herself. Wouldn't that be a hoot?
Oh... she needs to be undiscorded FAST.
Oh, damn, that was cold.
Either way, excellent story! but when will you be back to working on Waking Nightmares?
I'm..... not sure what to say. Just so we're clear, I don't LIKE the idea, concept, or how Derpy is treating Dinky... but...
This was well written. This makes sense. Gives me chills, but this is good. If Fluttershy can turn into Flutterbitch, ever loving and caring Derpy can turn into an abusive parent. For that, you get five sta- err.... thumbs up. You get a thumbs up.
Damn.
I know it was labelled "Dark," but damn. That was DARK.
My Little Sociopath: Hatred is Magic, created by Discord.
WOW...did not see that coming as i didn't even think that Fluttershy would be that cold.
Just wow.
A profoundly disturbing story. Well done.
I...somewhat enjoyed the writing style. I don't see why everyone's calling this dark though, I find this laughable. If there were stars, I'd most likely give this a 4/5, but have a thumbs up instead.
Well, Discord's channeling Palpatine would be the best way to get her to go chaotic on us.
Right. So.
The entire fandom is now prepared to throw down on Discord.
Like, in the words of Heavy:
YOU! YES, YOU! YOU ARE DEAD!
oh derpy......
GOD DAM IT DISCORD!
Discord's reaction?
That indeed was cold... but in a really flat way. I feel this whole text devoid of emotion.
There are some mistakes here and there (I.E. fill =/= feel), but nothing too hard on the eyes.
You write nicely. In fact, this story is good, but I just believe it isn't for me.
That was horrible... The writing itself was brilliant, the language was great... But it made me want to curl up and die.
Take my thumbs up. And my track, just please fix Derpy!
--Khroam
dear god! NOPONY takes MY derpy!
Looks like Discord needs to be... Punished.
media.comicvine.com/uploads/2/27843/538395-punisher_12.jpg
Is there any doubt that Discord's a Complete Monster?
235840 Fair enough. One cannot hope to please everyone.
Wow i feel bad for derpy My goodness
Your verb tense is a little all over the place at times. You fluctuate between present and past tense, maybe without knowing. I suggest you go back and tighten that up.
Other than that, this is an interesting turn of events. I'll just hit that little "track story" button now...
I feel sick now I'm going to go hide some where and try to forget this.
*STAMP OF APPROVAL!*
(I'll begin posting the POV Series here sometime next month. Until then it's available on deviantart!)
235887 I was thinking Discord should be punished with Rainbow Factory with a side of Sweet Apple Massacre and to finish it off...
...wow that was....wow.
Honestly i liked it alot
i usually leave extremely long comments but....meh.....not this time
Rage, apocalyptic levels of rage
woah... wow ditzy, thats really mean
Coming from an abusive father I just can't like this man. Nice try but it's a thumbs down
You actually managed to do an even sadder version of Derpy getting discorded than the last guy who did it over on deviantART! I didn't think you could manage that!
236675 I didn't even know there WAS another Discorded Derpy story...
I feel like the concept is solid, but it's almost taken a little too far. I understand the ideas behind Discord's magic, and I suppose that hate for Derpy makes the most sense (maybe? I mean, I'm not really sure that's the opposite of her virtue but you characterize it well enough). But if her hate is spawned from the fact that no one supported her, or her daughters, I feel like while seeing Sparkler might not do it (because, you know, she's a statue)... Dinky coming in as a pegasus, so desperately wanting to be with and support her mother seems like it would be her 'Twilight' moment.
I just can't buy that she'd say all those really hateful things, I can understand some of it, like being upset at her for getting wings. Which, if she did it to make her mom happy (something she's always characterized as trying to do) could possibly drain her colors. Even if you argue it's a perversion of Derpy's qualities as a good mother there's still a few problems with it, mostly that Discord's magic never seemed to affect anything other than the key virtue's of the characters, and of course the difference between being a poor mother and hateful... and just being evil.
It's still well written, and I'll definitely give you the Thumbs Up... but, I'm doubtful to read any more.
Derpy would never hurt her children!
236774
I hope you come back for Derpy's Reharminzation story, which should be done later this evening. And while I am glad that you... (enjoyed doesn't seem to be the right word here...) 'appreciated' the story for the most part, I can understand that you had some doubts about parts of it. The only thing I'll say in defense of my storytelling decisions is this: Discord is known to cheat.
But I digress.
delightfully dark and twisted...tracked
236817
Is this going to be all about Derpy or is it going to be a series of vignettes about various characters. Because if it's going to be a bunch of different vignettes I might be really tempted to stick around. I may keep an eye out for Derpy's reharmonization...
Who wants catharsis?
fc01.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2012/037/9/7/squeezin___it_wrong_by_mickeymonster-d4oenmk.png
Link
honestly, derpy needs tah be bucked in th' head right about now. and she's my 2nd favorite charecter in th' entire series.
236956 This particular side story is about Derpy, and will end at her Reharmonization.
237148
Ah, screw it. You write well enough. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt.
236721
Yeah, it's by Kendell2 over at deviantART. He came up with a different way for Discord to corrupt Derpy, & more importantly, even when she was discorded Derpy never hit Dinky in his version. Still, I see you plan on reharmonizing her too, so maybe I'll keep an eye out to see if this gets any less depressing.
236974 great pic lol 7th panel, discord: O.O dear celestia, what have i done?!
WORD OF AUTHOR: YOU ARE NOW OFFICIALLY OPTIONAL CANON. PLACE THE WORDS 'OPTIONAL CANON' UNDER YOUR STORY TITLE.
i1.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/004/077/Raisins_Face.jpg
I would've expected Derpy to slap Discords shit when she was effected.
Discord, you did this wrong. This isn't chaos. This is fucking EVIL.
cold and harsh
this is what derpy would be like
.........jeez..........If I never hated Discord before this, now I do.........this was very painful to read.
And that's why you don't release a god from his prison....buck.