Last One Out, Get the Lights
You'd better sit down. Maybe put on some Music.
Today, I will be uploading the last chapter of Fallout Equestria: Begin Again.
But this isn’t where the story was supposed to end. I just have to stop.
I know I promised you all more than this. And if you’ve been with me from the beginning. From Sola Gratia -
stringtheory regolit deathpony treesy
I’m sorry this is the way I’m ending it.
But I can’t do this anymore. I can’t write the word hoof when I mean hand. You know that I’m slipping. You’ve seen it. How many times have I used the word fingers? Even though Grace wouldn’t know a finger from a fish. How many times have I used the words Man and King and God? I’d say I’m leaving the fandom, but I don’t even know what episode we’re on. Or how many Equestria Girl spinoffs there are. It’s been a long time since I went on Equestria Daily…daily. I’ve been gone for a while now.
It’s funny. Grace has always been a pony in my head. Caliber, Ash, Damascus. They’re all little horses. And this is not America. Or Africa. This is Equestria. My own twisted version of Kkat’s own twisted version of a cartoon, storybook world. And I’m in it up to my neck. But I can’t hide what I’m writing any more.
I left home last summer, but I started Sola Gratia when I was seventeen. And since then, I must have put thousands of hours into it and its prettier Kid sister Begin Again. I wrote a short story for a competition last month (I got runner-up, which if you read the winning story is some serious bullsh… Sorry).
And it’s the first thing I’ve ever written that my parents read.
Before that, they had to be proud of me. Be it because I told them I was a good writer, or just because I’m their little girl/boy. Either way, I want to make them proud instead. I want to be able to show them the first book I finish. I want to be able to get it published. And show everyone. So I have to leave.
Over the next week, I will be putting up everything else I have to give you. I’m going to put up the images that inspired me the most. The songs that I’ve kept with me for the last two years. Old notes and half-finished ideas. It doesn’t sound like much, I know. But I’d rather leave it all behind. This story’s raised a lot of questions and, If you want, I can even leave you the answers (I do have them, you know.)
Where was I going with the orbs or Sovereign or the broken Goddess? Where was I going with Grace and Caliber? Was I going to go all Shakespeare and kill everyone at the end?
Or all Bioware and, well… Maybe it’s better that you choose your own answers.
I will not take this story down. Come back in a few years and read it to your kids if you’d like. But on April 16th I will be changing my password on FIMfiction to random keyboard bashed gibberish.
And I will log out for the last time.
I hope you all enjoy Flutterwonder and Flight Dream, both named for this fandom's inexhaustible talent. And, in that vein I have to say: Thank You, Kkat.
I'm sorry I can't be as passionate as you are about this place - these people. But I'm proud, still. Of Shiropoint and shortskirtsandexplosions and my beloved cenyo and of course, my idol, you. You were like my big sister. And you know what I’ll still be carrying with me, fifty years from now? Not Twilight or Rarity or Applejack.
But Littlepip, Velvet Remedy and Calamity.
Not Friendship is Magic, but Fallout Equestria.
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I sat with commitment,
and read the words that
plant flags in my mind and cry out
to tell me that I can too,
But tonight the words came in a fashion
that, in a sense feel more natural than
anything that's Graced my eyes before
From the heart,
comes a note on the handle,
of a door I opened all to frequently,
occasionally though, not frequently enough
The note was left with honorable intentions
to answer the question of
why?
And as I placed it back on the door, tears in my eyes,
I couldn't help but feel content with the answer
And now, I leave my own note,
wishing fortune and calm roads,
on a writer whose pros spoke to the inner being
of one who could only hope to Grace the slate
in some semblance of greatness -Epic
Good luck my friend. I haven't had the privilege of catching up on your story, but I can tell you that what I've read influenced my writing style. Your poetic style of pros gave me ideas and made me think a bit more about what I was writing. I understand your struggle, and though I'm disappointed that someone as great as you is leaving the fandom, I wish you nothing but luck and good fortune. I expect to see greatness on the shelf next time I enter Barnes and Nobles.
I stayed up late to write an abstract for a paper. Instead, I find myself being assaulted emotionally.
I love your style, runaway, and I agree wholeheartedly with
4214959 that yours is a great talent. The best of luck to you my friend, and not just from me, but from all the characters of my own bastardised FoE fic as well.
Your PM said that you remember me. Us. Those who have found ourselves in this niche fandom of post-apocalyptic pastels ponies.
Well you know what, runaway? We'll remember you too.
Godspeed man. Godspeed.
- Starlight_Tinker
While I'll be sad for your departure, I'll always be glad that you were here at all. As ephemeral as yours was compared to the many others out there, and as minuscule as it was compared to the giants of the original or Horizons, you still made something exceptionally unique here. Much like Grace and her paradises, you made a world so familiar to what we knew, and yet so different and unique from anything we expected. And then you populated it, and filled it with Grace and her light, tempered it in Hell with Damascus, gave it Caliber, and found Ash. You took a Dash through Zion, and had Hennessy with the buffalo. And then came the Twisted Fictions of the Sovereign, only serving to further my Sick Addictions. While I'm sad to see it go, I'm Grown Up Now. I know when it's Time To Listen.
So if this really is the last time I'll get to see this small Sistine, this microcosmic chapel of the wasteland, I'm glad to have read it, and gladder to have helped, no matter how small my part as a reader may be.
May your path be ever radiant.
~Average Wordsmith
I haven't even started a tank skin for Grace yet! (FoE tank skins are kinda my thing on World of Tanks.)
As for drifting from the fandom, I've been a brony for almost two years, and I can count on my hands the number of times I've gone to EQD.
I refuse to see the story of Grace, Caliber, Ash and all the rest end here. I'll continue it myself if I have to, dangit! (with your permission, of course!)
If this truly be the last time we see you, Runaway, then it be a sad day indeed. I wish you all the best, and I expect to be picking your bestselling novel up in 6 months, and you had better not shirk that, because I know what planet you're on.
Thank you for sharing your work with us, and may the best of fortune go with you.
While I had hoped I could be along for the ride from start to finish, I still really enjoyed your writing style and the characters in Begin Again. Once I get around to looking at the last things you put up after exams, I guess I can say that I was along for the entire ride.
Maybe I'll get to enjoy more of your reading down the line by some chance, because it was a real pleasure to read your work. But for now, best of luck to you in your future endeavors, whatever they may be!
To be honest, it really sounds like you need to just drop this story, and anything else around here that is causing you too much hassle.
But burning the bridges to fandom gateways like this? You're going to miss so many opportunities.
Don't log in for a while. Do other things, maybe get caught up on the actual episodes if you have the time. Pop in here once in a while and sey hello to some people, perhaps read a fic.
But we want to see you come back. We want you around. Doesn't matter if you're writing a story or not, that's just a bonus. But going onto top stories, looking at those accounts, and seeing that blog post about updating soon from 56 weeks ago? That last login of 50 weeks ago?
It's heartbreaking. Because everyone who sees that page knows that the person has abandoned everything they have done on this site. It's more than just canceling a story. ON this Internet medium, it's canceling a person.
So I ask of you, go what you need to to avoid the stress and hassle of pone. But please...
Please don't cancel yourself in the process.
I agree with Winter Storms on everything he said, when you look at a story and see its incomplete or a really good author and you see the last time they have done anything was like 50 weeks ago it breaks my heart. Its not in the lose of the story but it's really the lose of such an amazing individual, their ideas and their hard work,time and effort. I've seen so many people that are like that and it brings a tear to my eye.
Even though I admit I had some hard times reading Begin Again at times, I must say I loved it and that it's still the most unique FoE story thats out there! Gracie and Caliber are still some of the most influential FoE characters I have ever read about...heck they even inspired me to create a character thats similar to them for my own FoE story (if i ever get around to writing it), a character that I even recreated in Fallout New Vegas and have over 200 hours playing as and I love to death.
I understand if you wanna stop, it's your decision and I cant stop you no matter how much I beg/grovel, so I'll just say this.
We love YOU, the world you made, your ideas, and the beautiful characters you created, and I wish you the best of luck and a happy life!
~Ver0
Well, all I can really say is, best of luck to you, whatever you end up doing.
-salutes- I can only wish you well. Even though we have only spoke a few times, I enjoyed our brief conversations. And well, Ive already told you my feelings on your story. A lot of us will miss you! I'll still think your style is very unique, and I hope even if it isn't in this fandom, you will continue to find enjoyment in writing. Till we meet again!
I come back from a college visit to this...
Welp, its been great ride with your story, hope you move on to greener pastures. Although I do have to agree with 4216220 in that you shouldn't burn bridges in case you want to come back.
Same here friend...I have felt the same way too...
I understand what you are doing, and why you are doing it, which is why I support your endeavor entirely.
Oh, poo. I am saddened by the loss of one who can tie together so many different things into and amazingly creative and descriptive work of art such as this, but you got to do what's right for you. I know the point is moot now, but I do hope you didn't set all these bridges on fire as you may want to come back one day. Despite what has transpired, I am glad you brought this wonderful story into the world by creating a world of your own and allowing us to be a part of it.