The Brass Conspiracy

by MadHighlander

Celebrities

Ponyville
Next Morning

In a small town like Ponyville, it seemed, the rumor mill could really spin at incredible rates. Either that, or Pinkie Pie had somehow managed to visit everypony in town within the span of a single night. It was hard to tell.

Either way, as Twilight walked across town it seemed that ponies were speaking of nothing else but the impending visit by the Guild. From Bon-Bon to Carrot Top, everypony involved with a branch of the Guild was making sure that everything was as perfect as they could possibly make it. They didn’t seem to care that the Tour wouldn’t take place for another several months. As she entered the marketplace, Twilight even passed the town blacksmith (a pony she knew by sight but had never met personally, by the name of Forge Hand) polishing his forge from top to bottom.

“Hey, Twi’!” called Applejack from her stall. The usual selection of various varieties of (what else?) apples sat around the stall, sorted in baskets based on variety. Twilight greeted her in turn, trotting over. Rarity was also present at the stall, having stopped by for the same reason as Twilight.

“Have you heard the news, darling? The Guild is coming here! To Ponyville!” Rarity, like so many other ponies, was incredibly excited.

“I did hear, actually. I was just talking to a mare named Poison Point last night. Have you heard of her before?”

“In brief, yes. She’s the assistant to the General Guildmaster, if I recall?” Rarity replied in a questioning tone.

“Yes, that’s what she told me. And that basically sums up everything I actually know about the Guild.” As they talked, the two mares stepped aside to make way for a group of ponies to approach Applejack’s stand.

“Well, we’ll have to remedy that, and soon! I’m sure there are a few further things you must be aware of, even if only vaguely, so we’ll start from the beginning. The Guild was founded in a small village that would later become Baltimare, over a millennium and a half ago, by a machinist named Elbow Grease. At the time, they dealt in only mechanics. Over the years, they expanded to include the Metalworkers’ Guild, the Carvers’ Guild, the Weavers’ Guild, the Bakers’ Guild, the Theatrical Guild, and even the Farmers’ Guild. Each guild is presided over by its own Guildmaster, who themselves are presided over by a General Guildmaster selected from among their ranks. Today, most ponies who practice a skilled trade fall under the jurisdiction of one of the Guilds. I myself am a minor member of the Weavers’ Guild, which since sometime in the sixteenth century has covered all fabric-related professions.”

“That’s a lot of ponies.”

“Indeed it is. Equestria-wide, one in every five ponies is a member of the Guild in some capacity.”

Twilight thought back to the previous night. “So there are seven guilds, then? The only Guildmasters I know of are Axle Grease, Macaroon, Shimmerthread, and Grain Chaff, and the last two I’ve only heard mentioned in passing.”

“The ones you haven’t heard of are Iron Shod, the Guildmaster of Metalworking, and Stone Cutter, the Guildmaster of Carvers. The Guildmaster of Theatre, Two Face, poor fellow, passed away only a few months ago, and the other Guildmasters have yet to announce his replacement.”

“Have you ever met any of them?”

“Very briefly. When I was first starting my design business, I had to go to Baltimare to register with the Guild, and it just so happened that when I arrived, the Guildmasters were in the process of departing for Stalliongrad. Most of them were different back then, but Axle Grease, Two Face, and Iron Shod were there. Iron Shod never said a word – to be honest, he was a little scary – and Axle Grease was wearing this thick wool cloak, even though it was the middle of July. I never found out why.”

“Poison Point said he was badly injured a long time ago. That’s probably why; he was hiding his scars.”

“Oh, yes, that would make sense. He seemed to have difficulty speaking. I just assumed he was getting on in years, the poor fellow. Although he probably is that, too; I think I read in a magazine somewhere that he was born in the nineteenth century.”

As the last of a group of happy customers filed away from the apple stall, Applejack turned to the other two and commented, “Ah knew Grain Chaff for a time, when we were little. The Chaffs used to show up every Zap Apple harvest and buy a bunch’a Zap Apple Jam. He wasn’t Guildmaster then, a’course, but his family were still darn good farmers, even bein’ unicorns an’ all. Apparently they invented some kind’a warming spell that lets ‘em grow southern plants even up in Stalliongrad. His Equestrian wasn’t the best, but he communicated right proper.”

“Well, you’re lucky. I’m just so nervous about meeting Shimmerthread. They say her approval – or lack of it – can make or break a career in fashion.” Rarity’s smile dropped a few notches and she looked around. “I need to make sure that everything is perfect before the time comes.”

“Didn’t Hoity Toity and Fancy Pants both vouch for you?”

“Well, yes, but Fancy Pants’ endorsement was more on a social level. He doesn’t work in fashion, and for that reason Shimmerthread has the power to overrule him in such areas. As for Hoity Toity, well, a rather unfortunate thing happened last winter.” Rarity emphasized the word thing, dropping her voice to a conspiratorial whisper for a moment.

“A thing?”

“A very unfortunate thing. His reputation has rather dropped a few notches in fashion circles.”

“Oh… Well, what about the other Guildmasters, then? Do you know anything about them?”

“Not much about Stone Cutter, I’m afraid. He’s fairly new on the scene, just popped up and took the spot after the old carver, Whittlewood, passed away a few years ago. Nopony had heard anything about him before that. Now Iron Shod, on the other hand. I don’t know much about him as a pony, but there is this very interesting rumor about him. Allegedly, he lost an eye and a forehoof in a boiler explosion some seven years ago at his forge. But the interesting part, is that according to rumor, he then fashioned himself a prosthesis and eyepatch out of the shrapnel from the boiler, and trotted all the way to the hospital under his own power. I can’t speak for its veracity, and for that matter I’m somewhat doubtful myself, but a number of ponies I’ve met are very insistent, among them Miss Fleur de Lis.”

“Good to know, either way, I suppose.”

Rarity was about to respond when she was interrupted by the blaring of microphone feedback. Everypony in the square looked around for its source. It didn’t take long for them to focus on Mayor Mare, standing outside the town hall, who cleared her throat.

“Everypony! I have a most important announcement to make!”

The sound of several apples tumbling to the ground made Twilight look back to the apple stand. Pinkie Pie was sitting in the basket full of Red Delicious apples, having apparently just emerged from under the layer of fruit, carrying a megaphone in one hoof. She raised the megaphone and said, “I already told everypony, Mayor!”

Mayor Mare blinked a few times, and then replied, “Pinkie, you don’t even know what I’m about to say.”

“Sure I do! You’re about to tell everypony that the Guild is coming here six months from now for their annual Inspection Tour. And I heard about that last night, so I went around telling everypony. Sorry! I just couldn’t resist spreading the good news!” Without waiting for a response, Pinkie sank beneath the apples and was gone. Somehow.

Beneath her calm exterior, Twilight was, as she often did when Pinkie Pie did the inexplicable, repeating over and over in her head ‘It can’t be explained, just leave it alone. It can’t be explained, just leave it alone.’ She had no doubt that multiple other ponies in the town, including the mayor, who had promptly facehoofed, had their own similar mantras.

“Well then,” continued the mayor, “that was what I was going to say. So, if you all know, then that’s a good half of my speech that’s irrelevant. As for the other half, we need to form an official welcoming committee to plan-”

Pinkie hopped out of the crowd with her hoof in the air. “Ooh! Oh! Pick me! Pick me!”

The mayor blinked again. “Yes, Pinkie, I think it goes without saying that you are always on welcoming duty.”

“Yes!” Pinkie pumped her fist in the air. “But wait! I have to go start planning the party-planning party right away!” With that, the dashed off towards Sugarcube Corner, mumbling something about a punchbowl.

---

Canterlot – the Hall of Ages

Luna trotted down the richly carpeted Hall of Ages. The building was the oldest in Canterlot; some believed that it even predated the arrival of the Six Pilgrims in Equestria. Ordinarily, Luna avoided the place, as one of the windows closest to the door depicted the return of Nightmare Moon, an event she had been attempting to put out of mind for three years. Today, however, Celestia had summoned her to the hall with a mysteriously worded letter, stating simply, “Come quickly, sister. There are distressing portents in the Hall.”

Seeing Celestia standing by one of the brightly shining stained glass windows, Luna trotted over to join her. “What troubles thee, sister?”

“A new window has appeared. Look.” Celestia gestured to the stained glass window at which she was gazing. Luna followed her sister’s gaze.

The window depicted the tallest tower of Canterlot Castle against a starry background, but with tongues of flame pouring out from the windows of the throne room at its peak. The two standards that sailed on either side of the balcony were visible, as well. One was consumed by the fire, but the other – which should have depicted Luna’s crescent moon cutie mark on an indigo background - instead displayed three interlocking gears of various sizes on a dull brown background.

Luna stared for a moment, then stated flatly, “It is his mark.”

“Yes. Though how it may come to sit there, I am at a loss to explain. As for the burning tower, that too leaves me ill at ease, yet I hope we may meet once more. There was much left unsaid when we parted.”

“I too wish we could have made amends, but he was but a mortal… surely he was long dead even before my banishment to the moon, a full millennia since?”

“There are things in this world that we cannot hope to explain, sister. We two are but a single example of many. It is not impossible that he may live on in some fashion, somewhere in an obscure corner of this world. If it is so, I would make amends.”

“Even if it is so, I would advise against seeking him out. Such a quest may well bring aught but pain.”

“This I know all too well, little sister. Yet I cannot help but wonder…” Celestia looked even more closely at the mark in the image. “Cogspin the Younger… what evil has befallen you?”

Author's Note:

Headcanon: In the Hall of Ages, the Princesses do not have the stained-glass windows made; rather, the windows will spontaneously appear periodically before momentous events in Equestria.