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An homage to stories like The Substitute Demon, ALL GLORY TO THE OVERGOAT!!!, and 1000 Virgin Mares, 1 Frickin' Badass Dark Overdude, Infinite Facehoofing


One thousand years ago, the Princesses Celestia and Luna were blindsided by the return of the Masters of Equus. The cult of power-mad alicorns, thought to have been banished from Equestria forever, appeared in the middle of the Princesses' battle for supremacy, and caged them away. The rest of Equestria quickly fell to their might. Even the fearsome Discord was forced to his knees before them. All of Equestria was enslaved, and an era of misery began.

Now, one thousand years later, a lone unicorn mare has learned of a creature that might be able to overthrow the Masters. A creature immune to magic, overwhelming in size and strength, sealed away for centuries uncounted. A creature of ultimate evil: the Smooze.

Unfortunately for Starlight Glimmer, in trying to ensure the creature's obedience, she modified the summoning ritual a bit too far.

Because of her meddling, the soul of a recently-deceased human is pulled from Limbo, and given life, but not exactly a body. Now he has to help her save the world, or face obliteration.

Not much of a choice, is it?


Inspired by Pen Mightier and Bucking Nonsense, the legends who – to my knowledge – popularized the "human in villain's body becomes Equestria's savior" genre. May your inkwells never run dry.

Chapters (11)
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Discord's the only creature in Equestria who can recognize the human for what he is -- not the long-lost Seventh Element that never actually existed and couldn't have existed before the human arrived, but a meta-reality warper, an entity far more powerful than Discord with the power to warp the minds of all around him and the very rules of magic to make sure that he's always the Big Hero. And the role the human's assigned to Discord is the Villain to beat down or kill.

Pre-reform Discord's fine with being the villain. But on his own terms. Not dancing on some alien interloper's puppet strings.

Without friendship, or even allies, Discord's going to have to find a way to defeat a creature who can alter fate itself and who can even mind-control him. Or he may just end up worse than dead.

Art by Tenchi-Outsuno. Progress Bar at my writing journal.

Trigger warnings: Mind control (magically induced love, magically induced friendship, magically induced stupidity, Discord being Discord), noncon/dubcon (magically induced love, other forms of highly dubious consent), rape (female on male), violence/gore (mostly against Discord), literally everything in chapters 19-21, humans not being presented as unilaterally wonderful and superior to ponies and/or draconequui.

Chapters (26)