The first time we danced, she broke my jaw in three places.

The life of a disposable minion in the service to the Dread Ahuizotl is filled with acts of senseless violence and hardship, normally ending in a hospital or unmarked grave, but for Disposable Minion #3, the job just got more interesting.

He fell in love.

And love hurts.

Credits to the amazing Luvlessi for the cover art
Background music: The Masochism Tango by Tom Lehrer
With a wonderful reading by Luvlessi
And a second reading by Crafty Reads
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Spike carries each of the most important ponies in his life home after a long day.

A commission-turned-gift for B_25

UPDATE: A Spanish language translation for Carry Me Home is now available, made by Spaniard Kiwi on his deviantart.

UPDATE (2024): Them's Writin' Words podcast did a wonderful review of this story. I appreciate all the thought and work put in to their critiques and all the kind words.