"PerNoWriMo": A Luckless Lapse · 9:19pm Nov 6th, 2021
Blog Number 166: Penultimate Edition
🕔Four days to go...🕖
November so far hasn't been great. Not because of the word count: I'm on 8k words, which is only slightly behind target. They've been frustrating words, though.
For medical reasons.
📝 I might have mentioned last month that I was in hospital at one point. Although it threw me off for roughly ten days afterwards*, once I started Sorry (Seems To Be The Hardest Word), I thought I was back on course.
* You know those fics I published on the 19th and 21st? I only did that because my original plan (of doing all the projects I wanted and then saving the publication period for the final week) was dragging out, and I was so desperate for some semblance of victory that I published them early.
Unfortunately, since October finished, I've been floundering for directions to follow. That is to say, I had ideas. I still have some ideas for the Imposing Sovereigns contest and was quite prepared to tackle them in November and call them "inspired by".
Yet as soon as November started, the plan suddenly felt like going uphill. I lost confidence, reached randomly for a couple of projects, fluffed them, wondered what the hell happened, petered out, fought back, and frankly have had a shit time of it.
😩 Not pleasant.
At least I have landed upon a plan and am pursuing it with... well, not alacrity, per se, but with something that might pass for compulsive interest if it had a bit more emotion behind it. One project isn't far from completion, actually.
💡 I may have figured out how to create regular short stories. May have. I'm not stupid enough to be wildly confident just yet.
💉 But even just writing-wise, this week has been a miserable trial. To say nothing of the trouble brewing around it, which hasn't helped one bit.
That's why I bring up the hospital thing. I won't go into details, but the gist of it is: I thought I was over the worst of this problem last month. Now it's flaring up again, and thus I'm having a harder time than usual feeling good about myself.
🏥 I'm not taking it lying down, mind. I'm going to see someone next week about it. Hopefully, this is just a temporary relapse that I can muscle through or wait out, but my confidence isn't high. Perhaps if I have a tangible achievement before the end of this week, I might feel more confident in general. Perhaps. It's a theory I'm willing to try.
So that's where I stand at the moment. Terrible start, but hoping that soon turns around. I need it to.
🎇 Oh, and on a minor note: I got an idea for the decennial anniversary. Generally, I think I'll focus on at least the first ten episodes of Season One (or all of them, or a select few), since those were the ones that introduced me to the show proper, all those years ago.
The concept's not fleshed out yet, but I'm mentally working on it. I wouldn't expect a massive essay, or anything like that. Probably just some "greatest hits" post, or something similar.
Until then! Impossible Numbers, out. 👋
