The Night's Stars Update Sept. 30, 2021 · 6:46pm Sep 30th, 2021
It’s almost been two months since I’ve said anything about this story, so here’s an update.
The good news is I have two chapters that are ready for being published, aside from final edit sweeps.
The bad news is I haven’t heard from my prereader in over a month, he’s been offline for over a week, and it took me about a month and a half to draft one chapter. I am struggling to stay motivated lately. For a while, I was paranoid about coming onto Fimfiction. Every notification, feed, message (not that there were many in any category) made me feel anxious and gave me a sense of dread.
I think I am, to some degree, burnt out. As to how much that is, I don’t know. I might just not feel right. I have three or four stories that I’ve tried to read and, while good and interesting, I just lack the drive to finish reading them as of right now. I tried to start writing another story to give myself something else to do but I have kind of lost interest in it. I have the ideas for it I just don't feel motivated to put the effort into writing that.
I no longer feel confident about writing The Night’s Stars either. I have somewhere around twenty-six chapters drafted. I need to draft a chapter between some of them to... help with pacing and give a break for the characters between future events, to show more development of things, and to set up for unwritten future events. I am not confident that I can improve the story with edits, either. I feel like I cannot properly return to a mindset where I can write characters correctly, given how far ahead I have drafted. And as my prereader has pointed out, I have several shortcomings with the story as is drafted, which need to be addressed, and I’ve realized I’m not particularly skilled at addressing these. The story is turning out far longer than I imagined or wanted, and it makes me feel dread.
I have been procrastinating on sitting down and making notes for the story (I need to go through DMs with my prereader to make a collected set of notes on things that need work, and ideas I have had, because I seem to be forgetting things easier than I would prefer), and for a while, I procrastinated on a decision regarding the last chapter I drafted (which I finished drafting yesterday); ultimately I realized that while the choice isn’t one I am necessarily happy with because of how it makes that chapter feel, I did not really have fleshed out plans if I did not follow through. I am also realizing that I have made a few mistakes in plans where I don’t know what I’m doing, which tends to have resulted in the story taking a mood or tone that I don’t like. Edits will probably fix it, but I don’t really know where to begin. Perhaps I am simply overwhelmed. I am also worried that I will wind up ruining the story. It also doesn’t help that I don’t really have people to throw ideas around with or talk to about the story.
Anyway, I will try to get around to publishing a chapter in October (tentatively planning for the 14th), and I will try to force myself to sit down and start making notes and plans to fix these problems. I really do hope my prereader is doing well, but I have to admit I have my own personal worries about him. Hopefully, they’re misplaced and I am simply paranoid. I don’t mean to put you on the spot or anything.
Dont worry so much. I've favorited far worse fanfics, your story is definitely in the upper echelons. As someone that did a bit of writing myself, I am all to well aware that an author's harshest critic is themselves and I think that you are holding yourself to an unreasonable standard. This is an amateur website and none of us expect perfection. Just publish what you have even if it's not perfect. You can always edit it at a later date if you're unhappy with it. And if you are really unhappy with how the story has turned out then you can rewrite it later after it's finished.
I may be just a simple reader, I have no idea just how much work goes into making a story like this but, I do know you are doing a fantastic job, and as far as waiting for updates goes, well I'm patient and this is definitely a story worth waiting for. Try not to burn yourself out that's not fun for anyone, and hope both you and your prereader are doing well/ getting better.
If anything, take a break if you need too, my friend, cheers.
I just wanted to say if you're reading this thank you for creating this wonderful story in the first place. Relax. If you never updated again I would still appreciate the journey. You're imposing far too much pressure on yourself and letting it get to you it sounds like. Perhaps take a small break and then even just reread the latest 2-3 chapters that have been released and imagine where it would go from there to get back into things. Cheers and thanks, don't feel bad about expectations for a passion project, it's your own dream and don't lose that.
Take your time. While you may have fans and many people who adore this fic, the most important part of all , is that you as the author enjoys it as well. This fic has a certain tone and appeal to it that make it unique and is a result of your careful planning and care for this fic.
If you feel burnt out, its understandable. It takes a lot of work to get up to the point where you have this currently, I can imagine that looking forward may feel daunting as well. The best way to take on something daunting in my experience is the method of "ripping the Band-Aid" so to speak, for instance you could make drafts available to volunteer prereaders ? Just a thought, I have no idea what your arrangements are with your editor/prereader.
As an avid reader and someone who really adores the tone of this fic, thank you and your prereader for what you have given us thus far, I can only hope more would be made available, but not at the cost of the team's enjoyment of their own story. I wish you all the best and I hope your pre-reader is doing alright.