A Sort of "I'm Still Here, But Engrossed In My Own Issues" Update · 8:01am Dec 2nd, 2012
Hey, everyone... I have 616 notifications to get to and two messages to look at as well. I'll check up on all that at some point soon-- I promise. But, anyways, I just wanted to post something since I've talked lots in the past several weeks (and, now, it's been months) about my issues with chronic depression with thoughts of suicide and auditory hallucinations as well as other things that I've dealt with.
Writing? Reading? Using the site? To be honest, even... watching the show Friendship is Magic? I've thought about those things, but my seething mental block seems to have stayed with me or even gotten worse in my psychological treatment. I've had several sessions now.
On Friday, I spent most of the time talking about my auditory hallucinations. Like, say, hearing someone behind me talking to me (in a different voice than my own) while I'm sitting alone in my car about how weak, stupid, and horrible I am, with me feeling so depressed that I should just drive into a wall and off myself. My psychologist was (and is) very supportive. On Monday, I'll go in for a preliminary diagnosis. After telling me whatever treatable specific illnesses that they think I might have, then I'll see people on Thursday about options for specific medications.
To be honest, I was kind of toying with writing a story called Author Sanity Existence Failure about a hapless stallion (or mare?) that would just be a slightly fictionalized veneer about what I'm been going through-- the sessions and all that. This may be helpful. I'll see what works out.
I've said it before and I'll say it again-- I love you guys. I really do. I feel so impared, socially, from my issues, and this site has been a great blessing for me.
I don't know if I'm Rarity or if you all are Rarity. But I don't care.
*hugs and cuddles*
I'll see you guys later.
I came.
Also, I think we're the Rarities here.
Poor you, i really want to wish you best of luck!
You've not only been blessed with a site like fimfiction, but we have also been blessed with your stories here.
If i met you irl, i would support you like i do in here and give you lots of hugs.
So please, get better and stay with all of us on fimfiction
We
you!
*squishy marshmallow-y hugs*
good luck pal...I've been there...Still kinda am. So just don't give up ok.
Hang in there man! You have our support! And love that pic of Rarity & Sweetie Belle!
But seriously, do take care of yourself! I hope everything will work out for you! 
Man. If I met you IRL, I would totally give you a hug or two. And I'm not a touchy-feely person, but seriously. Hugz.
I honestly do hope that this is helping you out, Swipes. We are, of course, here for ya. You can tell us your problems too. It bothers my mind when I see people I respect/admire/idolize get depressed or hurt and such. We love you, man. Don't forget it, either.
And why does it matter who's Rarity and who's Sweetie Belle? It's marshmallow sibling snuggles. That should be enough, right there.
*marshmallow Internet snuggles*
-Plyxe, marshmallow extraordinaire
I don't like Rarity. Or Sweetie Belle.
So I suppose I'm the candle.
565111 //dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/sillyfilly_Rarity.png //dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/sillyfilly_Sweetie_Belle.png
I agree with 563635 here, we're the Rarity. Though don't let that get you down, SweetieBelle is an adorable squeaky ball of love that everyone enjoys
derpy.ponychan.net/chan/files/src/135390880969.gif
fc00.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2012/266/1/9/sweetie_belle_gangnam_style_by_chocomilkterrorist-d5fo0ko.gif
Dont listen to bodyless non-electronic voices, they rarely ever say anything good to anyone.
)I get scared in trickier intersections these days and I will do odd detours to use a light)
Dont drive into walls. Its bad for your body, your car, your insurance, and you public record.
Getting into car accidents aren't fun. I don't remember mine since my subconcious blocked it and I know it wasn't fun.
There are HOURS of memory that I am missing! Almost the entire DAY!
Dont do it.
(My accident occured when I apparently ran a red and took an SUV to my driver side door (no side airbags) while in my PT Cruiser(RIP old friend
Fictionalizing your experience? I dunno.
)
)
Could prove to be therapeutic (similar to journaling) or could aggravate your feelings about it.
Bring it up with your counselor to see if that would be a good idea, may even help him help you if he can see how you see it.(If that makes sense
Inaddition, let him know about your online support network(your fimfiction followers!
You can pull through this Swiper, we're in your corner!
3.bp.blogspot.com/-9iWWY1FbUvc/T38s-mWzaYI/AAAAAAAAB3o/TpaYuILgY24/s1600/R8.jpg
I go away for a few weeks and come back to this....
but other than that dont worry it will get better