Another nervous breakdown · 5:24pm Jan 11th, 2019
I've hit another point where my mind has cracked a little.
It's never nice when it happens. As always, there was no one particular trigger. I didn't "snap" and start smashing things, I just hit another of those insidious, exhausting holes that my depression hands me. I can at least feel them coming, and understand that it's chemical and neurophysiological and that all I need to do is ride it out.
I have decided to give Discord a break for a few days, just to let me have some time to rest. I just need some time to let my brain let go (metaphorically, obviously) and to breathe some fresh air and attempt to calm back down.
To that end, I am also going to do some more writing. This is a cathartic process which I greatly enjoy, and I am going to try and use that as a means to let my mind untwist such that I can focus on this again. Whether that means work, my home life, my writing, studying, cleaning the house, sex, or finally getting all of the Christmas decorations put away.
The move from Houston to here in Phoenix has been exceptionally traumatic. I can honestly say that moving from Australia to the USA was a lot less stressful. We are trying very hard to pool away funds for a downpayment on a house and to get all our outstanding bills paid in an effort to help improve our lot. So far that's been going well.
I often wonder how many people here on FIM actually use writing as catharsis? It's certainly helped me.
I hope things go well for you
4995389
I think I just need a few days away from Discord, just to give my brain a chance to rest for a while.
I find writing to be a way to express things which are not that easy to say. I found out about my condition when I was twelve years old and... all I wanted to do was to get it over with: in short, I wanted to die. A psychologist told me to write down how I felt and... for one moment I could be myself, free of any restriction, order or complaint. For me, writing is freedom!
I hope you can shake the depression and get past this quickly friend.
I really do hope things get better for you, for your sake. I have a rough idea of how deep the rabbit hole of mental illness can go, and I definitely don't want to go back. As for writing as a method of catharsis, I don't really have much experience with it. Personally anyway, the writing process (or any artistic creation process, with a few exceptions) feels more like doing work than anything. Honestly, the brainstorming process is the most relaxing for me. Though I might be a bit biased as I only have a grand total of 3 unpublished stories on the whole of the internet, and none published at all, but with at least 300ish ideas for stories. Have a better new year and good luck with any problems you might have!