Story Reviews » SA Reviews #127 · 4:07am Apr 29th, 2018
Seattle's Angels is a group that promotes good stories with low views. You can find us here.
“Listen up, class! Today I will teach you all that is necessary to build a fanbase.” PaulAsaran spun on his heel and began to write on a chalkboard. “Take good notes. A five page essay and three mock-up reviews will be due next week.”
A series of groans filled the classroom.
Intern, wearing his now customary janitor uniform, stopped by PaulAsaran on his way to dump out a trash bin. In a low whisper, he said, “That’s more than we do in two weeks.”
“Hush, you,” PaulAsaran replied. “I’m in my element.”
“What do you mean by that?”
PaulAsaran gave Intern a sideways glance and puffed out his chest a bit. “Since coming here, there has been a profound lack of structure and discipline. Now with this reviewer’s school, I can finally impart my years of wisdom in a controlled and proper way. It is the best thing to have happened to your ragtag group.”
Intern pursed his lips, eyeing PaulAsaran with narrowed eyes. “Not sure if I should take that as a compliment or an insult.”
“Take it as you see fit.” With a sharp and precise stroke to the chalkboard, PaulAsaran finished his lesson plan. “Now, I hope your new job hasn’t interfered with your old one. Got your reviews?”
ROUND 127
Months now. That's how long I've been serving penance. Cleaning hallways, doing chores, running errands. All for my actions in siding with Tirek.
But I've been good. I've been on my best behavior. I've said my apologies. And now, I'm almost free.
Just one, last, little job left.
Oh, Luna. Not the kids. Anything but that!
With this story we find Discord having to do the last of his Tirek-related community service at an orphanage. This might have been fine on the surface, but the local staff treat him like an abomination and refuse to let him even in the same side of the building as the foals. Worse, they’ve commanded him to do no magic whatsoever, and he’s obligated to obey. He might as well have been sent to Tartarus.
This is a gem of a tale for a variety of reasons. One would think it’s all about Discord learning patience and having fun being around children. Instead, it’s about him and the orphanage staff coming to learn that being different isn’t such a terrible thing.
And best of all, it’s all handled from the perspective of Viking ZX’s Discord. Seriously, if you haven’t seen how he writes the character, you’re missing out. It’s hard to find a more perfect rendition. It’s silly and random and nonsensical even when he’s at his most serious – and this is achieved without ever ruining the mood.
Read it. Love it. And remember, kids: don’t do gongs. They mess with your gears.
Discord on parole and having to do whatever the princesses say. Oh, the indignity.
I had a fairly good idea what to expect when I went into this and for the most part, I was right. However, there were some surprising character moments that made reading this worthwhile. Discord, being the titular character, naturally gets the most development and he’s well used here. Expect lots of sass, wordplay, and a general disregard for the forces of nature, along with a growing vulnerability that I found endearing. He’s the star of this story and he knows it!
The other characters involved also get plenty of moments to shine. Really, this is a character piece through and through and it will give you plenty to chew on. Luna and the orphanage boss in particular are the standouts.
I say give it a whirl if you’re a fan of being yourself while also respecting others’ boundaries.
The Great and Powerful Trixie narrates the tale of her encounter with a family's bizarre curse.
A re-telling in pony form of a 1910 story about one of Sherlock Holmes' ghost-busting rivals.
The Great and Powerful Trixie deigns to tell her… uh… biographer? Yes, I’ll go with that. Tells her biographer a story from her distant past in which she worked as a private investigator and looks into the mysterious haunting of an aristocratic pegasus family. I’m very much divided on my take of this, as the author admits the story is a copy of another written in 1910, and I am normally strongly opposed to such things as they are uncreative and lazy.
Normally.
Where this story deviates from that norm is in utilizing Trixie as the narrator – with all the narcissism and braggadocio that implies. Combine the singularly iconic voice of this memorable narrator with a literary style evocative of the common style of the story this is taken from and you have something that is fun and entertaining. So much so that I am willing to grudgingly wave aside my issues with the story’s origins.
To make my fretting even more negligible in the overall scheme of things, Trixie also throws in hints regarding pegasus culture, Equestrian history and – by far the most interesting – her own past. The implications of the story, the sorting between the typical Trixie-brand of embellishment and hard-nosed reality, are what will make this a must-read for Trixie fans. And underneath it all lies a simple truth about everyone’s favorite (or not?) showmare: if nothing else, Trixie knows how to spin a yarn.
It’s the Great and Powerful Trixie filling the role of Sherlock Holmes. That’s all you need to know. I can’t sell it any better than that.
Everypony knows that the future is predestined; the very existence of cutie marks proves it. Still, Minuette isn't so sure that she has to make the same mistakes twice.
Two ponies look to the future, and all the while one looks back to the present.
In a happy departure from everything the fandom claims about Minuette, here we find her as the Doctor’s assistant. Their dream, denied to them even by the Princesses of Equestria, is to unlock the secret of time travel, and after years of research, they’ve finally pulled it off! But Minuette soon learns that time travel isn’t as glorious as it’s cracked up to be.
I loved this story. From its new interpretation of the characters to its resounding message of seeing what’s right in front of you, it works wonderfully. Minuette’s struggle to ‘right the wrongs’ of her journey through time is well-conceived, well-directed, and potent with emotion. The delivery is a smashing success, and that’s important when dealing with a subject that has been talked about into the ground.
Is it a new take? No, not really. But it is produced well enough that I feel it more than makes up for it.
Time Travel stories can be hit or miss with me. They either keep the story simple and easy to follow or it goes off the rails and it’ll take a quantum physics expert to chart out what’s going on. Thankfully, this one keeps it fairly simple.
Minuette and her doctor pal have built a time machine and test it out. Unfortunately… it works. All too well.
We follow Minuette as she tries to hold onto the dream she’s been carrying for years while fighting off the feelings she’s developed while working with the Doctor. It’s a precarious balancing act that could tip either way at a moments notice. But since inventing time travel, Minuette suddenly has all the chances she needs to get it right.
Reaching the ending, I felt there were some things left for interpretation. If any of this sounds tempting, then by all means, hit it up!
One cold morning, a small grey filly crested the low hill at the edge of her family's farm, sneering down at the smoky swamp below as she sucked furiously on a squeaky yellow pacifier.
She was just old enough to understand that the arrival of her little sister Maud made her the "big girl" now... and she didn't like that one bit. Even worse, she'd heard mommy and daddy whisper that another was on the way.
But down there, in the swamp, was the means to end this madness. All she needed was to grit her teeth, toddle forward, and take it.
What this story lacks in narrative wit it more than makes up for in foalish content. Just imagine a toddling Limestone, barely able to speak and still sucking on a pacifier, deciding that she’s had it with siblings and that the best way to deal with the problem is to train a pygmy alligator from the nearby swamp to eat them. Throw in the fact she has all the same spunk and grit as we know from the show… only in baby form.
Yes, it’s as cute as you’d think. Especially when she makes her dramatic charge against the mighty towers of Igneous. And let us not forget that the alligator has plenty of character in its demur and ever-uncertain disposition.
This is the silly, cute nonsense of a child, and so very entertaining for it. If you like seeing foals doing foalish things, read this and try not to die from a D’aww overdose.
Cute and wholesome, that’s what this one is all about.
When you’re young and don’t understand why things have to change, you may have to take drastic measures to make sure things stay the same. Even if it means riding a toothless alligator.
Not beating around the bush; that happens and it’s as amazing as you’re picturing it. To say more would be to say too much, so get to reading!
PaulAsaran dusted his hands off of chalk. “There we are, class. A perfect example of reviews for you to follow for your assignment. Now, for your midterms—”
The door to the room busted in, resulting in all heads whipping in that direction. Then, those heads tilted as no one stood within the doorway.
“Down here.”
Gazes turned towards the floor, where Red stood with a clipboard held in his paws.
“What’s the meaning of barging into my class?” PaulAsaran asked, folding his arms across his chest. “This better be good.”
“Yeah, about the classes thing.” Red held up his clipboard for all to see.
PaulAsaran squinted but couldn’t make out any of the writing on the tiny paper attached to the board. “You’re going to have to tell us. I can’t see a thing.”
Red sighed, his tail flagging on the floor. “I’m sorry to do this to you, but the whole school stuff’s been cancelled. Higher ups are cutting the funds.”
PaulAsaran gasped as though struck. “But—but it’s been going so well. I’m finally in my element!”
“Yeah, well, elements change. Get your stuff packed up and get back to your desk.” Red turned to the students who were murmuring amongst themselves. “As for all of you, we’re not spending the money to relocate you, so we’re just going to eject you.” Before anyone could ask what he ment, Red pulled out a remote from his tail and pressed a red button. The roof above began retracting, revealing dark grey skies. The moment the ceiling completely folded back, the seats the students sat upon sprung up with enough force to launch them out of the building. Their cries of alarm and panic faded as Red closed the ceiling.
Watching this from the corner of the room, Intern shrugged. “Well, at least I don’t have as many garbage bags to throw out now.”
Feel free to visit our group for more information and events, and to offer some recommendations for future rounds. See you all next time!
Gonna read me sum gud shiet I heresay.
I read Baby Limestone Goes to War. Highly recommended.
I only heard about the inclusion of All the Time in the World thanks to a nod from Bad Horse on my user page, and I have been frozen in my chair ever since. I'm flattered, flabbergasted but so flattered. I'm going to be a useless, giggling mess at work tonight. Thank you so much!
4850018
You're quite welcome! Both for the feature and welcome to the horse fame that is our little corner of the internet... at least, what little horse fame that is..... anyway, you're quite welcome!
Scribbles down notes to pitch to the other team members
Well, 'Discord Day Care' kinda has the problem where a bunch of the gags are visual stuff that's a little laborious in text. But other than that, yeah, it's good Discord.