• Member Since 26th Feb, 2014
  • offline last seen January 5th

kudzuhaiku


She's looking at you. Yes you. And she is judging you with her eyes. There is no escape.

More Blog Posts2119

  • 56 weeks
    It's late

    But my brain isn't quiet. I'm stoned out of my goddamn gourd. Don't worry, it is just my usual regimen of drugs. That's how I spent a lot of my time now. Wasted. Doesn't really help with the pain much, but makes it a bit more tolerable. All of my drugs cost over 5 grand a month. That's what it takes to keep me going. I'm in somewhat better shape because of all of it, and there's a few bright

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    10 comments · 1,334 views
  • 66 weeks
    Cyborgification is potentially a-go

    Finally found a doctor that didn't run screaming upon seeing my spine images and xrays. The team is coming together. Met with the neurosurgeon the other day, and he thinks I am an ideal candidate for augmentation. The transition is happening, I think. I still have to pass a psych evaluation and other steps, but I am closer now than ever. First I'll have the trial run; they'll sink electrodes into

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    33 comments · 966 views
  • 95 weeks
    Today, life changes forever.


    It's been a long, long road to get to this point. A big thank you to everyone who has been with me during this journey.

    25 comments · 1,023 views
  • 96 weeks
    Big changes are happening


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    35 comments · 1,257 views
  • 119 weeks
    I suppose it is time for an update

    Been meaning to this, and I've become the King of Pro-Crasty Nation. I kept wanting to report, but there was nothing to report, no good news at all, so I just... didn't. Sorry. Went a bit silent on my end. It just sorta happened.

    I finally got a lawyer willing to take up my case. After that, things started happening.

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    17 comments · 2,046 views
Apr
9th
2017

I am SO excited! · 12:37am Apr 9th, 2017

Really, I am.

I get to introduce Beans and Toast very soon in The Perilous Gestation of Swans. I've been waiting for months... almost a year? I don't know. It's been a bloody long time.

Beans and Toast are twin siblings, brother and sister. They're foreign exchange students from the Grittish Isles. Since coming to Princess Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns, they've been learning the secretarial sciences with the desire to become administrative assistants to royalty. (This includes things like being a bodyguard as well, they're the total package, very much like Raven.)

They're both young, but chock-full of enthusiasm. And the best news? They're about to be assigned to a young prince in dire need of professional organisation. I've been tempted to introduce them in other works, like the Cookie Court, but I had to wait for them to have a right and proper introduction. Beans, he's a bit of a gasser, he's sociable and charming. He's quiet, polite, apologetic, and affable. Toast is a bit of tart. She can be loud, aggressive, and is all too willing to set everything ablaze should the situation demand it. She's come to Princess Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns to learn to be posh, but in times of a crisis, she keeps slipping back into old habits.

The twins carry two items with them at all times, two items of vital importance. An umbrella and a towel.

Comments ( 14 )

Another hook! I'm so ready for it!

Awesome. I can't wait to see their stories!

thing is... im British and i fucking HATE beans on toast... fucking disgusting.

The Towel of Doom and The Umbrella of...Doomer ?

I see it now, Kudz has just got a Fart Jokes book and is itching to use new material!!

...On another note!

Edit: NOW I find this...

Ooooh, exciting~! :pinkiehappy:

If pop culture has taught me anything, it's that there are very few situations where either an umbrella or a towel will not come in handy.

Someone channeling alittle Douglas Adams here

Ah, very good, they always know where their towel is.

4489129 I am but a poor student, without beans on toast I would never eat XD

4489129

Ah, but baked beans on toast is only the basis for better stuff.

Curried baked beans on toast
Sausage and curried baked beans on toast
Sausage, raisins and curried baked beans on toast

I had to fend for myself at school lunchtime - many things went in the saucepan with the beans...

at this point you are accidentally going to create an entire universe simply from thought alone XD

4489564 With our thoughts we make the world

"Now Mister Noble, you can either apologize to my Lord and we can give you this nice towel to sit on or my darling sister is going to shove that umbrella even further so that you might be able to taste rain. Your call m'lord."

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