Fic recs, December 5th: Captain Sand/Scarlett Blade edition! · 2:30pm Dec 5th, 2016
Next 'official' blog is gonna take some time, so have an edition in the meantime. :B
Oh, Captain Sand. I've been trying to catch up with your Youtube channel for over a year now. And I'm actually getting there! In honor of my audiobook list hitting 99 videos for first time since I added his stuff to it, I decided to go through a bunch of late-game audiobooks, the short ones, and review whatever came up. He doesn't always read the best stories, but boy does he read a lot, and here's a few less that I'll have to read later.
And I hit 1000 reviews for the year! :D
H: 0 R: 6 C: 2 V: 4 N: 8
Sunset Shimmer's Ordinary Afternoon by MythrilMoth
Reading
Genre: EQG
Sunset Shimmer spends a quiet afternoon at home.
I'll admit I was waiting the whole time for the other shoe to drop, but this is just a simple, slice of life piece about Sunset home alone. It's got some nice insights into her life, history and worldview, but for the most part, it's just calm and quiet. That said, there's a certain focus on nudity and so forth, which, while not untoward, seems nevertheless unnecessary. Then there's the "omake" chapter. If a quiet story about Sunset watching TV doesn't pique your interest, then the silliness of her quiet afternoon being shattered by, oh, something, might. I'd say reading the first chapter isn't even necessary to get the joke, and the self-awareness was refreshing. I've seen other stories with this main joke, but this one actually uses it pretty darned well.
Recommended for Fans of Slice of Life/Random Comedy, Respectively
Why Can't I Be Your Rara? by Oroboro
Reading
Genre: Drama
Meeting Countess Coloratura had stars in Rarity's eyes. Now if only she weren't so close to Applejack.
I love when writers can take silly fanon — in this case, the similarity of fan-slang nickname "Rara(ra)" for Rarity to Coloratura's canon nickname — and turn it into something meaningful. I also love this story because it avoids ship teasing; this is all entirely about friendship-level jealousy, and that makes it somehow more wholesome. I will say that the ending was a little more "get-along-y" than I really wanted, but then I do love tragedy. :B However you slice it, this is good writing.
Recommended
Goodbye Moon by Mocha Star
Reading
Genre: Drama
So in this fic, an earth pony is taken up in the air by Rainbow Dash at a Wonderbolt's show, then is accidentally dropped and dies. This would have been all right — there's actually some tidy world and character building at play — but the final scene, which I'm sure is meant to be cutting and emotional, is ruined by the characters singing the show theme song. Writers: don't do this. It's silly.
Not Recommended
I AM an Adult! by Summer Dancer
Reading
Genre: Comedy
A young Rainbow Dash finds herself the target of a crazy filly-napper from the future.
I am pleased by this story; it's an idea I myself wanted to write, and now I don't have to! It's not perfect, but there are a lot of good running gags and a fantastic referential joke in the middle. I also really like the ending.
Recommended
MEDIC!: From the Files of Nurse Redheart by Admiral Tigerclaw
Reading (part 1)
Genre: Slice of Life
I'm not familiar with the author, but this comes across as the rantings of a med student or professional who's tired of people misunderstanding everything having to do with doctors. (And oh, how people misunderstand, don't get me wrong.) The bit about Nurse Redheart actually being a doctor, but keeping the title, was interesting, but I have to say the first part is fairly dull. It's filled with standard mane six fanon medical complaints — Pinkie has secret diabetes, Rarity binge-eats, etc. — and I just didn't find it all that interesting. The second chapter, which features Redheart being kidnapped by changelings, is far more interesting, though again the dry writing style does its best to undercut this. The third chapter I appreciated for the poop jokes, but again, it's dry and filled with headcanon and snark that I appreciated far less. The final chapter is more of the same, the high levels of snark defusing my enjoyment of Luna newly appreciating, and then learning to fear, modern medicine. Overall, I won't say this is bad, but neither is it quite to my tastes.
Vaguely Recommended
Blindsided by Grimm
Reading
Mature: Sex
Genre: Fetish Fic
Twilight was alone, helpless, and extremely turned on.
I usually have a strong appreciation for stories like this. I mean, if you ask me, the idea of being blindfolded and tied up somewhere for a random stranger to have their way with sounds like the precise opposite of a good time. But the main purpose of a story like this is exploring if not explaining why someone might be into this, and that's good. Unfortunately, while being well written, this has a twist in the middle: Twilight's being fucked by her dad. And it does not make a good case for why people would want that. I was terribly disappointed.
Not Recommended
Dear Discord, I Hate You So Much! by Lise Eclaire
Reading
Reading by VisualPony
Genre: Comedy
Discord gets a letter.
This one's kinda funny but then the only real joke is "Twilight is tsundere as fuck". I appreciate a few other things, like the implied Dislestia, but there isn't much here, and it's not hard to figure out what's going on, making the ending joke fall rather flat. Might be worth it for a laugh if you can accept the main ship.
Vaguely Recommended
The Smartphone by SilverStar7
Reading
1000th Review of 2016!
Genre: Comedy
Twilight brings a smartphone back from the human world. Sunset Shimmer is not happy about this.
For a comedy, this is very thin. I got a few laughs in the middle, but neither Twilight stealing Sunset's phone nor Sunset having to explain what cell phones are to the mane six is particularly funny. Also, it tends to ramble interminably onward instead of coming to anything like a point. Not much to recommend, here.
Not Recommended
Princess Celestia's Legendary Litany of Laughable Losses by Prak
Reading
Genre: Comedy
When it comes to fights, Celestia's record is not as great as she'd like to think.
When canon brings to light things like "Celestia loses to Chrysalis" and "Celestia can't even clear clouds right", you can get really angry and throw a fit over the show not validating your headcanon, or you can write a funny story to gently mock the idea that maybe, just maybe, Celestia isn't as badass as we'd all like to think she is. This is a fine comedy, filled with laughs at Celestia's expense as she endures losses both martial and inexplicable. The final joke is perfect, and overall, I very much enjoyed watching a lot of Royal Sister bickering.
Recommended
Electra Complex by Majin Syeekoh
Reading
Genre: Comedy
Shining Armor, feeling old, notices something up with his daughter at breakfast.
Given I just read a legitimate incest fetish fic, this was welcome. Incest isn't even the focus here, serving only as fodder for Cadence's hilarious reaction. No, the focus is Shining Armor, in all of his dopey, middle-aged Dad-ness. I adore the way he's written here: the intrusive thoughts that flicker into his inner monologue, his desire for things like marshmallows in his cereal. It's incredibly sympathetic. One could bring this story to task for not following through with the ramifications of its own setup — indeed, the merest hint of incest could be seen as little more than bait for the teeming legions of degenerates who send those stories to the top of the featured box — but given all the directions follow-through could take, I'm glad this ended where it did. It's just a light, funny look at Shining's household a dozen years in the future.
Recommended
Secrets by NeonGreenTiger
Reading
Genre: Slice of Life
Lyra and Octavia come home early, to find a surprise from their roommate.
This story has two things going for it: Octavia and Vinyl in a story where one of them is shipped with somepony else, and a rather different take on Vinyl's background. That said, it's very transparently just a vehicle for that background, the effort to stand out from far more widely used fan versions of Vinyl Scratch. It's not bad, but there's not much story to it, either. Check it out if you're really into background ponies or just want to see something different.
Vaguely Recommended
Bat Days by Pedro Hander
Reading
Reading by Winged T. Spears
Mature: Sex
Genre: Non-Con
Well, if you're gonna write a story where becoming Flutterbat turns Fluttershy into a sex-crazed monster, you may as well have her go after Big Mac, cuz that's good shippin'. Sadly, that's the only thing I like about this piece. The writing is just weird, full of off-putting word choices. The final line is the worst offender: it plain doesn't make sense! The whole thing is fast-paced and just not fun.
Not Recommended
Shower Break by SergeantBuck
Reading
Mature: Sex
Genre: Humanized Clop
Multiple problems with this. I couldn't really get into the headspace of this OC who is apparently in a relationship with Luna and/or Celestia. The fact that he's blushing and stammering around Spitfire just makes one wonder, is all. The plot is fairly standard sexy stuff, with Spitfire teasing him constantly and events conspiring to make sure he gets to see her naked as much as possible. But, inexplicably, the sex occurs over maybe a dozen lines at the end. I mean, literally nine tenths of this is just buildup and teasing. It's got no merit as a story, and it's barely got any as a clopfic! I'm just surprised, is all; I mean, I tend to rush the sex in my own stories, but come on.
Not Recommended
Dead and Loving It by Trick Question
Genre: Dark Comedy Story Collection
Dying for Attention (Reading): The Great and Powerful Trixie delivers her own eulogy. What can I say? This story is pure, unmitigated hilarity. :D You know Trixie visiting her own funeral couldn't be anything less, right? R
Celestia's Vacation (Reading): Celestia fakes her death. And in the worst possible way, too! Most of this was just generally amusing, but when you get to the actual funeral, oh my god, you will not see that coming. This is really something. R
A Deal to Die For (Reading): Applejack goes coffin shopping. This one's actually a good bit darker than the others, and suffers a tad for the comparison. I mean, it's still funny, just not as laugh-out-loud funny. C, If You Like Dark Comedy
Overall, though, this collection's great, be sure you check all three stories out. :D
Recommended
Raindrops by Intet22
Reading
Genre: Slice of Life
Once, Twilight treated the rain like a friend.
This story is sadly both overwritten and telly. It's a shame, because the sentiment is a good one, and I generally like the idea of Twilight rediscovering something she loved as a filly and then grew out of. That sense of reconnecting with the past in a new way, as an adult, is something worth writing about. This just doesn't bring out the greatest potential it could have.
Vaguely Recommended
Size Doesn't Matter by Skylas
Reading
Genre: Comedy
All four Princesses get together for a rare conversation.
I might have appreciated this more had I not just read Spank the Monkey, above, to which this does not hold a candle when it comes to sexual innuendo. Still, it doesn't help that it's lightning-fast and generally simplistic overall. There's just not enough gone into here to help support its single, central joke, which isn't honestly all that funny. Oh well.
Not Recommended
Suddenly by Maresogyny
Reading
Mature: Sex
Genre: Erotica
Twilight and Starlight really, uh… Wow, they just kinda go at it, don't they? Slow down, girls, geez.
Wow. That title doesn't lie: there isn't a hint of pretending to set things up before they're both just on each other, going to town. c.c Unfortunately, much like the other erotic fic in this blog I was appreciating on more than just a prurient level, this one goes in a wholly unnecessary direction, by which I mean Spike getting a boner. I mean, it sets up a decent joke, but it didn't have to happen. Disappointment yet again.
Not Recommended
A Friendly Letter from Chrysalis by Hidden Master
Reading
Mature: Sex
Genre: Letterfic
There's a good idea in here, but I have to admit, I'm really sick of fanon insisting that Chrysalis had with sex Shining Armor, especially when it's used here (in an extremely roundabout, barely believable manner) to explain why Flurry Heart is an alicorn. Mostly, this just comes off as Chrysalis acting childish for no reason, and though there are a couple good jokes in it, overall I was not impressed enough with the first part to want to keep reading the second.
Not Recommended: DNF 1/2
Ya got it wrong, bro. That ain't Twilight talking in that fic.
There are more stories in the series, and I guess they reveal who wrote the letter? But the pairing is much stranger -- although, and it's funny that I'm the one telling you this, it's not a pairing you haven't read before. It's just really uncommon.
4329485
But she's dictating to a dragon. o.O How is it not Twilight?
4329486
Spoilers, yo. The pony grabbed Spike and forced him to write the letter, I can tell you that. If you want more, PM me -- I ain't revealing nothing here, don't wanna do that to Lise. She's a cool one.
Any review is a good review! Thanks so much, even if it's an older story.
4329492
Huh. Dunno how I was supposed to get that from the context, then. <.<
Welcome to my stories! Not that you'll be reading another one anyway.
Yeah, I just wanted to write a comedic slice of life where Flurry Heart was hitting on her father because I thought it would be funny. I had no intention of actually following through with what could happen because chances are that wouldn't be funny and would either be heartbreaking or super-creepy(or hot depending on your kinks).
What you see is pretty much the story I intended to write, and I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Ah nuts!
I was idly hoping you might be able to slip in a review for Orbiting Kettle's 2nd-place winning minific A Good Filly.
(He really needs to learn how to market himself and his stories.)
4329522
Patience, m'dear. :V
4329561
I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS
4329654
FEW SEEM TO >:V
Gratz on 1000 reviews!
According to the stats page, there are approximately 105,000 stories that have passed moderation, so given the amount of time you've been reviewing, you may well end up having reviewed 5% of the fandom's stories before you (finally, someday) move on to greener pastures.
4330130
That's 1000 reviews for the year, sir. :B I don't quite think I'll hit 3900 by the end of the year, but that just means 4k in 2017, whoo! >:V
4330359
Er, right, I knew that but I was unclear about saying it, hence my estimate of 5%. Cool that you're gonna hit 4k overall soon!
Hmm, not the best hit rate this time round... but I AM An Adult is going straight on the list, and a fair way up too. I need to read that.
You know, I could see that being used in a brilliant way to explain exactly the same thing. I can't think of how myself, but I'm sure someone could. Shame this story doesn't seem to have done that.
4329522 I've read Harissa and quite liked it, but I can't say I've even thought about OK beyond that, so maybe you have a point.
4330927
His recent minific was excellent. I think he's been improving considerably, and I was surprised to find he had such a low follower count (at the time, it was like 74 i think).
I haven't read all of his works, so I'm not the best judge (and I'm not a well-read sort of critic in general). My comment to PP was primarily regarding the fact that OK just posted that fic, and a review would have helped it get into the Feature Box. I fear it will miss the FB by a hair's breadth, which is a shame.
4330130
Not to be pedantic, but I think there are at least 50% more stories that have passed moderation. A surprisingly high number of stories on Fimfiction get unpublished or deleted. I can't remember how I discovered this, but I think it was in seeing the ratings where a story could be ranked "150,000th most popular", etc.
4330956 I'm honestly not sure how much use the FB is. I've had several fics reviewed by PP and various other people, yet (as far as I know) nothing I've written has ever made the FB. To be honest, of the two I'd take a review any day.
4330982
The FB gives you an absolute crapton of readers (hundreds and hundreds, if you stay on there for at least a day), which will increase your follower count substantially. It's only a means to an end. I wouldn't have 400+ followers at present if I'd never featured.
In contrast, a review provides you with (sometimes) valuable feedback. But a review by PP, even a good one, isn't going to increase your reader count much. The same thing is true (sadly) for being featured on Equestria Daily. Feature Box is the biggest reader draw there is.
This despite the fact that most of the stuff in the FB is random garbage.
4330989 *Shrugs* As I said, I have never made it to the FB myself in all the four and a half years I've been on Fimfiction. Not once, not even for ten minutes -- as far as I know, at least. So after more than 20 stories, I'm pretty much resigned to the fact that what I like to write just isn't what makes it to the FB. I suppose I could increase my chances by writing clop or trollfics -- but I don't want to do either of those. My heart wouldn't be in them. I don't want to write 500,000-word shipping epics or Fallout: Equestria side stories either.
And I'm really not too bothered about follower count: maybe I'd have 320 followers instead of 160 if I'd featured, but it's not something I think about much. Feedback is everything to me. Give me a choice between 50 followers and frequent comments/reviews or 800 followers but little feedback and I'd take the 50 every time. Obviously 800 followers and lots of feedback would be best of all, but I know I'm not going to get that! The single nicest thing that's happened to me in all my time on Fimf is having It Doesn't Matter Now picked up by the RCL. I wouldn't swap that for 500 extra followers, I really wouldn't. (Mind you, an RCL feature gets you a site post here, so that did bring quite a few new followers!)
I mean, if one day by some chance I do write a fic that gets featured, I will probably enjoy the feeling -- but I won't have any deeper emotions than "Well, this is fun". I don't think it'll give me any more motivation to write than I have now.
4330927
I can't, honestly, because it's Cadence who had the foal. o.O Unless you want to start getting into "Shining isn't who we think he is" or "ponies don't work how we think they do" shenanigans, which I suspect will overtake any serious effort in a fic it would be in.
4330956
I don't think I've ever reviewed something into the FB. :B Mostly because I read things well after they're published.
4331196
Aha! I figured out how to do it (despite the flaw that won't let you search bookshelf 1)!!!
https://www.fimfiction.net/index.php?view=category&user=27580&bookshelf=1
Apparently, one of your long stories was briefly featured in the bottom three (the place where "updated stories" go). So it didn't appear to do much.
But in all honesty, you'll get featured someday. You seem to be a good author, and at some point if you keep writing you'll hit something that a lot of readers want to look at when they see the blurb. That's all it really takes.
4331203
Note that that only tracks stories since bookshelves were implemented, of course. :V
4331215
Some of us did not discover Fimfiction until a little over two years and one month ago. :V
4331202 Well, that was my point: it would have to be something brilliant (and original) that nobody's even thought of yet. One of those fics where you read and suddenly it clicks and everything falls into place. I have no idea how to make it work, but it wouldn't surprise me that much if someone out there did. (I suppose something a bit like Anthropology's twist that Lyra was originally human. Not that I was a huge fan of that story, but you get the idea.)
4331203 Heh, "one of [my] long stories" -- collections apart, that's the only multi-chaptered story I've ever published here!
I'd completely forgotten about that "Bookshelf 1" trick, though, so thanks for that. But after four and a half years, I think the notion of "it'll happen someday" is wearing a bit thin. That doesn't bother me, though, as I was serious about not having the FB as an ambition: I barely think of it at all, especially as I almost never use the FB to select stories to review.
4331251
Well, in any case, today I believe I proved that "Twilight discovers lesbians. Chaos ensues." is the correct blurb to enter the Feature Box in record time.