Twilight Sparkle's School of Harmony Retrospective

WARNING! Potential spoilers for Twilight Sparkle's School of Harmony ahead.

I know, I know: done already? This story was a lot of fun to write, especially for my first romp into pony comedy. When I started I wasn't sure how long I wanted it to last, but I already had a lot of the classes in mind, and, ultimately, I didn't feel like I could do much more than a single day in a school. So the story takes place in a single day, which also leaves it rather short. I hope that, all the same, it was an enjoyable ride.

For those curious, I thought it might be fun to talk a bit about the background on this story, decisions going into it, and some stuff that got left out.

Again: possible spoilers ahead.

First off, the intro used to be a lot different. Its tone was apocalyptic, speaking of fire from the heavens (the phoenix pair) and horrible creatures (Timberwolves, Whoopsie's monster) while Twilight sat smiling in the middle of it all, snapped to a point of pure bliss. It was an enjoyable intro and a hell of a hook, but ultimately it was felt that it was too over-the-top compared to the ACTUAL ending, which could leave a reader feeling cheaped-out if they stuck with the story for almost 20,000 words. The new intro gave me a chance to include Spike a little bit more. Truth be told, he's in the story so little I thought about not including him at all, but I found him to be too vital as a messenger and critical in some of my favorite jokes. It also helps build the world a bit outside the walls of the classroom a scene is taking place in.

Originally there was also going to be a third lesson where multiple classes were combined to see how elements played together. The only example that really stuck was Pinkie and Fluttershy teaching a class together, where they use tickling as an example of both Kindness and Laughter. They would have found out that some kids respond awful to being tickled, and, when used as an example, Fluttershy would straight knockout Pinkie on reflex when Pinkie tries to tickle her. The thought amused me, but like I said, it's the only one that really stuck. Other ideas were written down, but I couldn't think of a single combination for Twilight and Magic.

The scenes with Twilight and Whoopsie were a last-minute addition. Originally the only interaction we saw was Twilight yelling from down the hall, and when we next saw her she'd be a complete mess. The idea was that her time with Whoopsie was some mind-numbingly nonsensical that imagination was a better tool than me writing it out. However, it also left a reader itching for answers, and without them Twilight's madness felt almost too extreme. So, a few small scenes with a slow build-up were added.

The kids were probably the hardest part of writing this thing. Seven new OC's, and I wanted to be sure that each felt unique. I knew from the start that I wanted them to later represent the Elements, but man, was getting that to align hard. For starters, I had their personalities down before their Elements. I didn't want to get tied into tropes. One example of this is Once Bitten representing Laughter, rather than Kindness like the also timid Fluttershy. I also had to try really hard to make sure each was redeemable. The story needed conflict, and kids can be awful to one another, but I needed to show that they're not awful ponies: they just don't know any better. This means I couldn't make anyone too dick-ish, or the character development shown at the end wouldn't feel earned. I also struggled with getting these unique personalities to match up with the Mane 6, even structuring the classes completely around what lessons made the most sense to learn in what order. For example, Tootie had to learn Kindess last, because otherwise a lot of the conflict in the second act would be non-existent. Stuff like that.

Additionally, even though it didn't make it into the story in any way, the students have fairly fleshed-out backstories. I didn't include any of it for a very specific reason: they're not funny. Some are borderline tragic. Going into it would have made them a little too relatable/redeemable, and would have severely brought down the tone. This is exactly what wound up happening with Ponies Protecting Ponies. Don't get me wrong, I love that story, but when I started writing it was supposed to be a straight parody of the show. Not to be taken seriously. Then it evolved into something serious. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that, but it's just not what I wanted to do this time around.

For those curious:

Vroom (originally named Roller Coaster): Youngest member of a large family; can't always afford meals. Feels a constant need to prove herself for attention. Blanket/cape only genuine source of comfort.

Once Bitten: Tends to have bad luck with new locations and first impressions. This renders him uncomfortable almost wherever he goes, and hesitant to say anything to anyone.

Street Smarts (originally named Twist Turn): Comes from a hard neighborhood where doing well in school isn't something to be proud of. Excited to be somewhere that he might be able to prove he can be a good student.

Roly Poly: Divorced parents. Constantly switching schools and cultures. Becomes a hardcore follower as a way to adapt to new people and locations and "fit in".

Sullen Stare: Thinks that the only reason he's at the school is because his parents don't want to deal with him.

Tootie Frootie: Comes from an upscale family, and has never seen much conflict in her life. Somewhat neglected by her parents; they treat the dogs better than her. This partially leads to her interest in dog treats.

Whoopsie-Daisy: [REDACTED]

I bring all this up not just because some of you might find it interesting. I also want to use it as an example of how the characters were driven moving forward. For example, knowing Roly's background led to me constantly showing him "joining up" with whichever group appeared to be the biggest or the strongest. He's a follower. This also led to a character moment in the final act where he takes charge and tries to get his fellow students to do something. I think this concept is important for writing. For anyone looking to make good, original characters out there, my advice is to know the character inside and out before you start writing them. Where they come from, what they've been through, and how that motivates them. It doesn't have to all be in the story, but it will definitely help bring the story to life. Just my two cents, of course.

Any other tidbits you're curious about? Leave a comment below, and I'll add it to this post! Hope you all enjoyed the read, and I'll see you next time!