Divided Rainbow Chapter 36: Sneak Peek! · 12:39am May 1st, 2015
The next chapter's still in the works, and it'll be a while yet before it's ready. But I'm keen to show you this sneak peek.
As with all the other sneak peeks that came before, this represents a work-in-progress, subject to edits and change. Enjoy!
Surprise was as vital to laughter as air was to the lungs, just like Lero had taught Fluttershy at their very first comedy lesson. So when Lero and all the members of his herd: Lyra, Rarity, Spike, Twilight Sparkle and Rainbow Dash all showed up at Sugar Cube Corner just as it was closing for the day, and told her that they wanted to help her throw a party, what could she do but laugh? And then they gave each other such goofily confused looks, and Fluttershy laughed some more!
Then when Fluttershy had gotten herself back under control, she asked, “So who’s this party gonna be for, anyway?”
“Uh, well,” said Lero, scratching the back of his mane with those funny little fingers of his! “We were hoping you could help us pick out somepony, Shy.”
“Huh?” said Fluttershy.
“We… uh… it could be one of us, if you want!” Lero offered awkwardly. “If it’d make things easier! We could make up a reason for celebrating, no problem!”
Such an unexpected answer! Giggles overcame Fluttershy. “You don’t even care! You just want to celebrate for celebration’s sake! Oh my goodness… I’m rubbing off on you!”
“WAAAAAHHH!! WAHHH!”
“Oh!” Hearing sweet little Pound and Pumpkin wailing, Fluttershy turned to the others and said, “Sorry, everypony, please give me a minute!”
Then she ducked into a side pantry, pulled out one of the all-purpose flour bags inside, and trotted into their nursery with it on her back.
Pound and Pumpkin were crying in their crib, the precious little dears. While her Herd Bellerophon friends waited and watched politely from the hallway, first she checked their diapers but no, they weren’t soiled. Next, she tried feeding them from their bottles, but they just pushed them aside. Fluttershy knew what this meant, and her smile spread wide.
She’d been right! They’d been crying from needing to be entertained! Yay!
The little ones’ eyes were already upon her as they heard the bag being ripped, and looked up at her as she positioned it over her head. Then she span it upside-down and let the flour spill all over her; getting all into her coat, her mane, her wings… and the babies laughed and laughed their wonderful, heartfelt, rejuvenating laughs. And she had to laugh along. She was suddenly now WHITE when she should have been YELLOW! Goodness, what had happened to all her color?!
Feeling inspiration when she felt a powdery itch in her nose hairs, Fluttershy stretched out her face ridiculously as she snorted the ticklish flour deeper into her nostrils before belting out several large and exaggerated sneezes:
“Waaaa-CHOOOO! Waaaaaaaa--CHOOOO!!!”
Oh, this one was their best laugh ever!
“Quick, Rarity!” she begged her friend, “create one of those small stormclouds of yours, so that it washes all this flour off!”
“Er… right here?” Rarity asked. “Don’t you have a shower you can step into?”
“Showers aren’t as funny as stormclouds!”
Soon enough, Fluttershy was feeling rapid raindrops pelting her pelt. Predictably, the flour dust expanded to a doughy mash, and that just made Pound and Pumpkin’s laughter even double what it was! Fluttershy sensed that they were even finding it hilarious how Rarity was creating that small-but-powerful wind along her hooves that was catching the flour-glops before they could land on the floor, and blowing them straight into the trash can right by the table… so maybe this was even a triple laugh!
Fluttershy’s heart swelled with love for both of the babies. It was all so simple with Pumpkin and Pound. No need for memorizing joke books or studying humorism theory with these two. Just dump some flour on your head, and you’d have lovely, lovely laughter running over you! For now, anyways. While the babies were still young. Still had yet to develop any sort of higher-brow sense to their humor.
Fluttershy blinked as she felt Rainbow Dash rub her dry with a towel.
“How about I keep watch over the little ones here, while you guys plan out that party?” Lyra suggested, sitting herself by the babies’ crib.
“Party?” Fluttershy asked dimly, still focused on that wonderful sound the babies were making. If only it were possible to bottle such a noise like soda in a soda jug, then open it up and spill it straight into your ear like…
“Yes! A party!” smiled Spike. “Why, think of how much more joy and laughter you could be bringing to dozens of ponies at once, if you threw a party!”
Gasping at Spike’s incredible genius, (baby dragons were just so smart!) Fluttershy exclaimed, “Right this way!”
Bubbling over with new excitement, like way too much bubble bath soap in your bubble bath, she flew into her bedroom. Where was her pink journal? Where was her pink journal? Aha! Right here, by her wind-up chattering teeth and her snakes-in-a-can!
While her other friends were packing themselves into her room, one by one, Fluttershy was flipping through her pink journal, looking at the names after glancing at her calendar. "No, not him. Not her… or her, either. Maybe… oooh!” She looked up from her pink journal at her friends. “If we’re going to throw somepony a party, could it be Berry Punch and Ruby Pinch?” Fluttershy asked the others.
“Berry and Ruby?” Lero asked.
“Didn’t you know?” Fluttershy asked. “They share the exact same birthday! Berry gave birth to Ruby upon her very own birthday! So it’ll be a DOUBLE birthday bash! Ruby will be six and Berry will be twenty-eight!”
Oh, it’d be such a fun challenge for a fun and funny party planner like her, planning a funnily funtastic party for a mom and her girl at the same…
“I just don’t get your humor anymore…”
“So lame…”
“I’ve seen blows to the head that’re funnier. No, wait, don’t actually do it!”
“I think I remember hearing that joke when I was a kindergartener…”
“You used to be the coolest pony ever, Fluttershy. Can’t believe I used to look up to you…”
It was such a strange feeling. Like ice-cold vines had sprung up out of a deeply buried place within her, wrapping themselves around her heart. So completely unlike her usual self. But all her confidence of moments before, all the eagerness which had driven her to find other ponies and tell them jokes was just crushed. Like an empty can under a hard hoof.
“Or… then again… maybe that’s a little too ambitious for me right now,” she said, much more fainter. “I’ve been making such a nuisance of myself these past few months… nopony would possibly come to any of my parties…”
“Fluttershy?” she heard Rainbow Dash ask.
She looked back up and forced herself to smile. “Of course, I always have you guys, right? Maybe a small party with just us in it might be right…”
The others were all looking at her with worry and sadness. Except for Lero, who was looking at her cutie mark. She almost wondered if she still had some dough on it or something. When she glanced at it herself, she saw that it was clean. Just the same as it ever was.
“Actually, Fluttershy,” Lero said, “Let me talk with Berry. See if I can’t win her over.”
“Really?” Hearing this filled Fluttershy with both thankfulness and dread. “But what if Berry won’t do it?”
“If not, then we come back, take another look at that journal of yours, and see who else in town is gonna have a birthday soon,” said her comedy coach, coming over and putting a reassuring hand on her withers. “All we have to do is just keep at it.”
* * *
Berry Punch’s Wine and Liquor Store was not even a full block away from Sugar Cube Corner, and it was still the middle of the day. The members of Herd Bellerophon almost all went there as a complete group like they had just done for Fluttershy… but at the last moment, Twilight Sparkle thought better of it.
“Poor Berry would probably think we were all ganging up on her or something!” So after discussing it amongst themselves, it was agreed that Lero, Twilight, and Rainbow Dash ought to be the ones to go talk with Berry Punch. The others all returned home.
Walking into Berry’s store was almost like walking into a well-lit wine cask. The floors, the walls, ceiling… even the shelves holding the merchandise seemed to be made of that exact same cut of wood.
“Fancy a free sample?” they heard Berry ask.
Turning to the right, they all saw Berry Punch just a single bodylength from her cash register. There was a small tray with plastic sampling cups beside two partially-full wine bottles.
“This one’s from an all-new winery,” she explained, nudging the tray forward. “Local place, only a few miles outside of Ponyville, just opened for business a week ago! It’s called Grullo Grove, and this is a sample of both their white and red. Please try one!”
“Well, Berry…yeah, sure,” and Lero drank one of the little cups of red wine. The highly tannic taste would linger on Lero’s tongue for all the rest of his conversation with this mare.
“Excellent!” he exaggerated, “Thank you, Berry! Say… I heard from a friend that you’d soon be turning twenty-eight? And Ruby Pinch will be six?”
“Wh… yes!” said Berry in surprise. “Yes, that’s right.”
Lero, Twilight, and Rainbow Dash, (though Lero and Twilight did most of the talking) then went on to explain to Berry how they wanted to throw the birthday party FOR her and her daughter, with Fluttershy’s help. At first, Berry regarded this almost with suspicion; as though Herd Bellerophon might be trying to set up some kind of nefarious scheme worthy of a murder mystery.
“I’m… honored, I guess, but I still don’t understand why you’d want to throw this party for me. I mean, you’re a nice guy and all, Lero, but we’re not exactly besties or anything.”
“Lero’s the kind of stallion who’ll go completely out of his way for ponies, even when they’re not close friends!” Rainbow Dash stated. Lero could spot a tremor in Dash’s legs, as though they wanted to bring her to hide behind Twilight or Lero again, but her face was too busy looking at Berry Punch square in the eye. The human felt a little honored.
“Well, in all honesty, we’re doing this more for Fluttershy’s sake than anything else.” Lero admitted to Berry.
“Bring her back to her old self, you mean?” Berry asked, eyeing the well-known pegasus mare who, not long ago, lost all control of her animals and her life, only to regain stronger control over both with Lero’s help. “What you ought to do is just have Fluttershy throw a smaller party at your own place, Lero.”
Lero laughed slightly. “Yeah, Fluttershy suggested that herself, actually. But, well, I’ve been helping ponies… work through certain issues of theirs for a couple months now. And one thing I’ve noticed is that the best way to cause a breakthrough is with a certain amount of… pressure.”
Bringing Pinkie Pie to Big Mac in that hospital had been an emotional ordeal, but it had caused her to realize the true meaning of the mark she now bore. And Lero had talked with both Rarity and Rainbow Dash after they’d achieved equilibrium, and both of them had told him that everything the glufferflork had put them through had forced both of them to re-examine their lives.
“A small party at my place won’t do Fluttershy any good,” Lero told Berry. “It’s too safe, too contained, too low-key. I mean, you aren’t really riding a bicycle until the training wheels come off, right?”
“Bi… cycle? What in… wait,” Berry was squinting as though struggling to recall a story some drinking buddy might’ve told. “Isn’t that the name of some kinda minotaur doohickey?”
“Yes,” said Lero, feeling very stupid.
“Human metaphors asides,” Twilight spoke up, “We can make this party into something BIG for you and Ruby, Berry! We’d be pulling out ALL the stops! You’d be helping us, Fluttershy especially, as much as we’re helping you.”
Lero did not miss the sympathy in the earth pony mare’s eyes. Berry Punch might’ve been a far cry from a model citizen, but when all was said and done, she truly was a Ponyville pony. And Ponyville wasn’t some gritty, eat-or-be-eaten cutthroat’s ghetto, but a kindly community where everypony knew one another and neighbor helped neighbor.
“...Though we’d have you meet with us for lunch or something, so we plan everything out, so everything meets the needs of you and your family! We really do want to help Fluttershy make your birthday super-special, Berry!”
“Is that so?” Grinning, Berry Punch ducked under her counter and pulled out a hidden bottle of stronger-lookin liquor, pouring herself a small bit. “Well, if there’s one thing ol’ Berry Punch can appreciate, it’s a party! Me and Shy have always had that in common!”
She drank it down, head bopping as though she could already hear a DJ’s dance beat. “A full-out first-rate Fluttershy Fiesta for me and Ruby…hey, is this gonna cost me anything?”
Twilight scoffed dismissively. “Come on, Berry! You know Fluttershy better than that! Has she ever charged anypony one rusty bit for her parties?”
“No,” said Berry. “No, she parties for partying’s sake. I once saw that girl break out her noisemakers and confetti to celebrate a duck quacking.”
“We… um, thought that poor Miss Mallardly had lost her voice forever,” Rainbow Dash said. “But then one day, she quacked properly, and it was so wonderful, and I can tell nopony’s interested... “
“Money is no object with us,” Lero told Berry Punch. “However much this ends up costing, we’ll foot the bill. But I give you my word, Berry; this won’t just be some mediocre cake-and-candles deal. We’re gonna help Fluttershy make this a celebration to remember.”
“We’ll even buy gifts for Ruby Pinch if you tell us what kind of stuff she likes!” Twilight promised. “Millionaires will be envying how much pure fun you and Ruby and your whole herd and all your friends will be having! I swear this on the name of my mentor, Princess Celestia.”
Berry looked at them all, rubbing her head several times as though to make sure booze wasn’t tricking her senses. “On one condition. On top of everything else, you guys are also entirely responsible for cleaning up this party when it’s over.”
“Deal,” Lero agreed.
Berry suddenly left her counter, waltzed up to one of her store shelves and pulled down a prestigiously elegant crystal-clear bottle. She brought it back and held for Lero to take from her mouth.
“Oh…” The bottle read Vintage Gold Standard 120 Proof Karabahk Vodka, and its price tag was one hundred and fifty bits. “Berry, this is far too…”
“Take it,” she said. “My gift.”
He ended up putting it in Twilight Sparkle’s saddlebag.
“Gotta be honest with you, Lero, I don’t think this party of yours is gonna fix Fluttershy’s problems the way you’re hoping it will. I’ve seen that girl; she’s MESSED in the head. But you’re gutsy for taking this risk. And even if you’re only able to deliver half of what you’re promising… well, when ponies are willing to screw themselves over that much so I can have a good time, the least I can do is treat them to a nice drink.”
Party is going big or going bust. This ride has no breaks and we can't get off.
I'm betting the party almost goes bust and that is when shy has her moment and manages to pull it all back together. I'd hate for this to turn out like applejack.