Hey

It begins.

Oh my god why did I do this

Comments

[Charlemane]

img.gawkerassets.com/img/17cb1dk9nljqkjpg/original.jpg

[Stormcaller]

i.imgur.com/Z8hbhna.gif

[TGM]

Good

Good

Let the sequel floooow through you, and your transformation to the sellout side will be completed

[Lord Destrustor]

2845070
Oh noes!
I'm already too much of a soulless husk! I can't sell out on top of it!

[bobbananaville]

I don't know, why did you do this?
I haven't read it yet, but just looking at the title and summary I'm going to note that the audience for the original is probably not the audience that you're seeking in this story.
I mean, the necromancy audience will eat it up, just as they did the last one, but otherwise I know I read it to see Twilight's descent into insanity, and her frantic, lunatic paranoia get the better of her. This (again, based on the title - which, like it or not, is part of what makes someone decide to read a story, and is important in letting readers know what they're getting into) looks like it's on a completely different boat.
That said, I think that disregarding the apparently action-oriented theme, this looks like the best way you could handle showing Twilight's story post-Dead Light - with Slice of life, non-chronological snapshots rather than a focused portion of her immortal life. And I haven't actually read it, so it's entirely possible that what I imagine it to be is different from what it actually is.

Also, as a quick note, I apologize for telling you in Dead/Light to post it all at once. I've recently had a change of heart; the longer it's unfinished but still recently updated, the longer it will be in the feature box, and the more people will be exposed to it. It is very annoying to know that the story is finished, and it's best to not let your readers know that it's far in, but you shouldn't post too quickly unless it's specifically a gimmick.
Just in case you took my advice to heart.