Read It Later Reviews #6 – Lessons in Falling, Candles, Destination Unknown, Sister, ‘Neath the Mistletoe · 11:58pm Dec 27th, 2014
I hope everyone has been enjoying the holiday season! Always a bit weird having a holiday, followed by one day of not-holiday before the weekend, though I suppose our friends in Canada and elsewhere have Boxing Day to make sure that doesn't happen.
These are all short stories I reviewed last night while working on Mistletrapped, on which work is proceeding apace.
The stories I read today:
Lessons in Falling by Gold4tune
Candles by Golden Vision
Destination Unknown by Pale Horse
Sister by Eyvind
’Neath the Mistletoe by ArgonMatrix
Lessons in Falling
by Gold4tune
Romance, Random, Slice of LifeFollowing the time honored tradition of "Learning by Immersion", Rainbow has just the thing in mind to teach Twilight how to fly. Namely throwing her off a cliff.
Why I added it: It was recommended to me on the forums.
Review
This is a very short story about Rainbow Dash shoving Twilight off a cliff in order to test her flying instincts and teach her how to fly. This is all that happens; the story doesn’t really go anywhere beyond that, though it does end on an amusing note as Rainbow Dash carries Twilight back up the cliff so she can drop her off again for round two.
The story is short, simple, no-frills, and to the point, and mostly worked. It does, however, randomly make Rainbow Dash into Twilight Sparkle’s girlfriend in the story for no apparent reason; it really has no bearing on the story, and it would have worked equally well if they were just friends. Heck, it might have worked better as shipping fuel that way – everyone knows that catching your loved one while falling is a sure way to get kisses.
So clearly, dropping and catching them repeatedly is the optimal way to encourage their love!
Actually, it might have been better if they’d made a joke about that.
It is really hard to say something only 1,200 words long which actually does what it is trying to do is bad, but it is also hard to recommend something which is so short and yet which still randomly inserts some aspect into the story which is utterly unimportant and doesn’t really add anything to it. It also contains a couple of typographical errors, as well as a few missing commas, which is a bit strange in a story this short. It also uses “buck” as a curse word, which is very weird given that Applejack bucks her trees all the time.
Recommendation: Worth Reading, if only because it is so short and to the point.
Candles
by Golden Vision
Romance, Slice of LifeSweetie Belle shares a candle on Hearth's Warming Eve.
Why I added it: It was mentioned in the comments of Mistletrapped.
Review
A Sweetie Belle x Spike shipfic, this is very much a mood piece. Sweetie Belle is drinking alone and watching other couples drink and light candles together for Hearth’s Warming Eve. Spike shows up and is awkward and funny. He offers to light a candle together with Sweetie Belle, she accepts, and they go off together.
This story, I think, falls into the primary trap of Sweetie Belle x Spike shipfics – namely, Spike seeming like he is settling for Sweetie Belle because he can’t get Rarity. Rarity is brought up and Spike seems a bit wistful, and then talks about how she has an awesome little sister, too. That is incredibly awkward, and also just feels wrong – instead of seeming sweet, it instead comes off as “Well, you’re good enough, I guess”. Given that the story seemed like it was supposed to be a sweet little romantic vignette, this ended up messing it up for me – it is the only real reason we’re given other than that Sweetie Belle is a good singer for Spike to like her, and the latter is not really much of a reason to want to kiss someone. The writing is nice enough overall, but it just didn’t end up delivering the feeling I was hoping for.
Recommendation: Not Recommended.
Destination Unknown
by Pale Horse
Sex, Romance, Slice of LifeTwo passengers on a train ride toward an uncertain future. One is a pony. The other only pretends to be.
Why I added it: It was featured by The Royal Canterlot Library.
Objectionable Content: None. The sex tag is because it is mentioned that they had it at one point, but it is totally non-graphic.
Review
Vinyl Scratch is a changeling.
Vinyl Scratch loves Octavia.
Vinyl Scratch and Octavia are fleeing Canterlot, before Vinyl is discovered – either by the ponies, or worse yet, by the changeling swarm whose attack was repelled, but who would surely come for her once more.
Ponies are food, they say.
But to Vinyl, they’re not. They’re love.
Vinyl may be a changeling, but she is now a pony at heart, and she values the ponies for what they are – friendly, loving creatures who freely dispense love because they want to. But Vinyl is scared, and the voices of the swarm are closing in once more, so it is time for them to run, because she is too scared to ask the ponies for help for fear of what they might do to her in the wake of the attack on their home.
The story is set while the pair are on a train ride north, but it doesn’t really matter – almost the entire story is told in the form of a flashback, of how Vinyl went from a starving changeling to a changeling who never needs to feed on love again because of the love that she now shares. On the whole, it works well for what it is, with solid writing and some fun little digressions.
Recommendation: Worth Reading.
Sister
by Eyvind
Slice of LifeNightmare moon was defeated a few weeks ago. Luna has finally gotten back into her nightly routine. Everything seems fine. That is, until one night when Celestia is unable to fall asleep due to some pent-up emotions. This is the story of how Luna helps Celestia find closure.
Why I added it: I was asked to review this.
Review
This is a very short story, clocking in at about 1,400 words.
Like some other very short stories, this story struggles with properly expressing the idea that it has. Celestia is worried that Luna hates her, but the story doesn’t really end up exploring it very well. The vast majority of the exposition is a setup for the ending, with the two sisters sharing a somewhat uncomfortable moment as Celestia seems to want to talk to Luna, but fails to do so. This scene is actually pretty decently written, like several of Eyvind’s other stories, but really feels like it is a setup to a much larger piece; instead, it takes up the bulk of the writing here.
It is only in the second scene, less than 300 words from the end of the story, that we find out what was bothering Celestia – she fears that her sister hates her, we hear why she fears it, and the two of them hug, Luna suggests something to make her feel better (ice cream), and they go off and are okay.
This is not really enough. Emotional climaxes both need to be built up to, justified, and to feel like they have the proper amount of weight; fearing that someone else hates you, as the central focus of the story, needs to both have justification and power behind it; we need to feel their reason for the fear. Here, we just don’t have enough space to do so, and the first scene doesn’t really set up very well for the second one – while Celestia being standoffish is certainly a potential symptom for her fears, it doesn’t really justify the emotional climax which we rush to in the end of the story.
Recommendation: Not Recommended.
’Neath the Mistletoe
by ArgonMatrix
Slice of LifeIn the midst of a Hearth's Warming crisis, Rarity steals Spike away from Twilight to help resolve her dilemma. One lesson and two happenstances later, the situation leaves them somewhere neither of them could have predicted.
Why I added it: This was recommended in a post in The Writer’s Group.
Review
This is a very light, fluffy Christmas story about Rarity kidnapping Spike in order to get him to tell her what the best possible Christmas present would be, while Twilight is busy scolding a reindeer – a travelling mistletoe merchant – about his product. Spike explains to Rarity, after some small bit of doing, that the important thing is that it is a gift from Rarity, not that it be the perfect gift for Twilight, because it is the thought that counts (though of course Rarity spoils this somewhat by pointing out that her gifts are very lazy – at least, by her own standards).
In the end, both of these come together as Spike and Rarity decide that they need a bit of mistletoe for the perfect outfit for Twilight, at which point we find out why Twilight was scolding the merchant.
If you realized that the plant shown as the story’s cover-art is not mistletoe, you’ve already figured out the ending. Not that that stops Rarity.
On the one hand, there isn’t much to this story, but on the other hand, it is pure Christmasy Hearth Warming warmth, is short and to the point, and doesn’t really have any distractions or mistakes – it does what it does and then gets out of the way.
Recommendation: Light Christmas fare not recommended outside of that niche.
Summary
Lessons in Falling by Gold4tune
Worth Reading, if only because it is so short and to the point.
Candles by Golden Vision
Not Recommended.
Destination Unknown by Pale Horse
Worth Reading.
Sister by Eyvind
Not Recommended.
’Neath the Mistletoe by ArgonMatrix
Light Christmas fare not recommended outside of that niche.
Clearly I should have read all of these stories earlier, before I read the Hearth’s Warming stories, so that I didn’t drop off a big bag of coal on Boxing Day.
Number of stories still listed as "Read It Later - Recommended": 166.
Number of stories listed as “Read It Later”: 1527
Two of them? I guess this is the 'Throw Twilight Off A Cliff' edition of RILR or somethi-- wait, it's just a typo. Never mind.
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Ah yes, the power of copy-pasting and forgetting to fix it.
Sorry about that. Fixed now.
I wonder which tropes would be interesting to do a full review thing on...
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Lessons in Candles
Following the time honored tradition of "Learning by Immersion", Rainbow Dash has just the thing in mind to teach Spike about the magic of romance: throwing him off of a cliff and catching him at the bottom.
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Sister Unknown
When Celestia is unable to enjoy the train ride due to pent-up emotions, Luna helps her find closure. (Also, Celestia is a changeling.)
No
stop
we are not doing this dammit
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You know, that's a remarkably good remix idea.
Too bad Twilight already knows how to fly, otherwise that would be a fun double premise for a TwiDash story.
Not that that really can stop us from setting it in the past...
Well, I've got other things to write.