Ebola Chan is my waifu. I am an avid RPer if interested.
I'm going to be honest for a few minutes. I fucking hate TGWCOP.
Because he is a tyrant and running this site in manners similar to the Nazi party of Germany circa 1943. He must be stopped and I am employing both the Texas Rangers and Nigerian Navy to assist me. Obviously when he is executed for war crimes and treason against the crown America's economy will prosper once more and I will be a special guest on the Rush Limbaugh show.
So apparently once again it looks like I am headed to the wondrous state of Illinois in my never ending search of drugs and sex and various other illicit activities. Oh and I get to stop in the wondrous city of pizza and murder for about 12 hours while I wait on the oh so reliable Amtrak too! YIPPEE! 
How the fuck do I get myself into these sexy misadventures?
I has Twizzlers. Twizzlers are God's pubic hair. Everything is now ok.
I would literally trade sexual favors for Twizzlers.
Ok... I came downstairs to make fish and as soon as I got down here I start hearing these loud footsteps upstairs and get this feeling that I'm being watched. I go to look and all the doors are locked and no one is up there... I'm scared shitless right now.
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it's your mom dude
your mom is totally watching you and fapping
go tear that shit up man
2493243
She's an extremely stealthy fapper.
I just realized this, though... you were making fish. She wants you to know that you don't even need to bother going downstairs for fish~
2493257
Dude, the signs are all adding up. Next thing you know, she's going to wear a button-up with the top two buttons popped and lean down in front of you. You better take advantage of that moment for all our sakes.
2493262
I'm not the one that has a jizz falling and splattering fetish.
Calm down, lay low, and stay quiet. Keep your phone on you. If you see someone call the cops
Solid Snake is in your house. This is the only explanation.
2493526
The truth is, he's already behind you. He knows how to always be out of your field of view. It's over.
2493551 Hot.