Be my 1000th watcher! · 6:13pm Sep 27th, 2014
Archmagejay became my 1000th watcher!
Now, wherever he goes, people point at him and say, "Isn't that Archmagejay? Bad Horse's 1000th watcher?" Women flock to him.
Or they did, until Bradel unfollowed me, making Archmagejay merely my 999th watcher. See, after Archmagejay became my 1000th watcher, DuncanR, who is an amazing writer you should check out, became my 1001st watcher before I could write this post. So Bradel graciously unfollowed me to bring it down to 1000 again. But by the time he did, Adam95F had brought it up to 1001 again, and so TheJediMasterEd also unfollowed, bringing it down to 1000.
And now you, yes you, can be my 1000th watcher just by unfollowing and then following me.
Unless somebody else does the same thing after you. Maybe you need to be a little sneakier... wait for somebody else to unfollow me, then unfollow me, wait for them to follow me again, and then follow me again.
Unless...
Ah, just do it. What could possibly go wrong?
Whee. I unfollowed and then followed you. Good thing there's no significant entropy operating here, cuz that's "churning."
Woo! I did it! Felt good man!
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No. I am keeping my hipster slot of following you before you made it big.
But congratulations/uncongratulations/recongratulations on your 1000±1th/st watcher.
¡Badoosh!
Come on, Jay, be a... pony! Take back your usurped position. Just let 17 more cycle to 1000 first so I can be 500!
I just realized the power of alts. A man with a thousand and one alts could be Bad Horse's 1000th AND 2000th watcher.
Oh for ...
fc01.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2010/068/1/f/Facepalm___Sebastian_by_ShizukuSatou.jpg
Hmm, still at 999, perhaps I shall wait a bit...
Wait. Are women going to flock to me now? Is that how it works? If so, I can't say I'll be getting much writing done.
This is what I get for perusing writing guides that are clearly superior to my own. Curse you, Bad Horse! Cuuurse youuu!
It's now a race to become the 1000th 1000th follower.
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Wait, that was my evil plan. I've been creating alt accounts all day long. They're very clever. Admiral Biscuit, Admiral Biscuit 1, and so on.
Congratulations.
What you've accomplished is to get a bunch of weirdos to unfollow you, then repeatedly refresh the page until it says "999 followers," then frantically hit the "follow" button, then refresh to find that the number is now either 999 again or 1001. Unfollow, then F5, F5, F5...
And give up my place in line?
I have no idea what we are queuing up for, but I know it will be glorious!
Still true when I loaded this page. So y'know, kicks.
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See, now that I can get in on.
All part of the plan. I'll get everyone to do this and be the 1st follower in no time!
Everybody here is a friggin' lemming and an even worse hoser. I mean, really? This doesn't achieve anything. Like, were you guys expecting efame? Your epeen to get hard? Women to flock to you and attend to your every hyper-sexualized fantasy? You all disgust me!
Yeah, I did it, too.[/hypocrite][/lemming][/hoser][/failandaids] It took me a couple of minutes to do because my phone kept on crashing when I hit the follow button. But in that time, someone could've sniped that spot so easily :D
There ain't any women rushing to my side with tubs of ice cream like I expected.
Something rather unexpected to come from all this is that HoofBitingAnalOverlord is no longer follower 666. He has lost the most today.
Wait. Bradel? Doing evil crap? BH is super lying! I'M CALLING IT!
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I dunno. You can write while simultaneously doing naughty things with ladies. Multitask. You'll prolly end up screwing up one of those two things massively, but hey. Worth. Just say writing is your fetish. Sure.
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Any relation to HoofBitingAnalOverlord?
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That picture is not enough to describe the amount of fail and AIDs that BH has induced.
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You are a hoser. But your taste in !human Rarity gifs is excellent. I cannot stop watching her sway.
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Ghost... apparently you are neither a lemming or a hoser. I guess that means you don't have to deal with first world problems like DuncanR. So many needy women he has to appease now, yet no time to write... #whatdo
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You must get an eBay account.
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I just realized that doing this will spam BH's notification 1000 times. Yay! We're all poking a bad horse in his bad places![/pester]
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Just think of the evil you could do with all those sock puppets afterwards. You could get into the feature box, get someone's story out of the feature box, win arguments in threads through sheer mass count on one side, spam notifications to hell, and make fimfiction's newest member suddenly jump from 0 followers to eleventeen bajillion in a second (SURPRISE WELCOME TO FIMFIC WE FOLLOW YOU).
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Apparently you are as cool as Ghost, and not a lemming or hoser, either. #ghostcircle
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That is a plan most vile, disgusting and evil in its grandiose. Do continue.
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Negatory. Turns out I don't get notices when someone who followed me before follows me again. Or maybe they have to unfollow me for a longer time.
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wat
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Yeah, she's my sister!
Ha! People actually did that??
In December of 2012 (I think?) when you did your Christmas present, I was watcher 402; I have since dropped down to watcher 358. I'm curious how much of that was natural churn and how much of that was because of this.
What? I'm sorry, I'm baking Christmas fruitcake.* Did something happen?
*Yes, in September. That leaves at least two months for brandying which, as The Rarity Chick informs me, "is the whole point of fruitcake.**"
** She loves it, I didn't, until I found out she loves it. So now I'm surprising her with some.
She loves the Pyramids too. This could get ugly.
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That makes me so very sad. How is mischief suppose to happen now? :/
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You apparently have the patience of a sniper. Snipin' crap off of eBay is fun. Well, unless you have a laggy internet connection.
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I wish to meet your sister.
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People are dumb hosers.
Hello! (Hurr durr)
*waves like retarded seal*
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Prolly due to, in actuality, natural turnover. It's, like, they read that one nice fic BH got featured and was all slice of life-y and had Twiley and Celestia watching the sunrise(I forget its name. Nice BH fics ain't too memorable.). Then, they check out his other works like Moments (aka "Comet Song Story") and they're like, "Screw this crap! Too scary! Later!"
I'm sure there are other BH trap stories like Sunrise/Implied TwiLestia earlier in BH's fimfic career. I've just forgotten about them. After all, I follow BH because he's pure evil. Truly the only reason.
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...Aaaaaaaand never mind. Ed now makes BH look kinda wimpy, because:
That shit's made by things far more evil than devils, daemons, and monsters. Therefore, Ed is now more evil than BH. All to win the heart of a cosplayer? Who obviously corrupted Ed? Ok, this Rarity Chick is more evil than Ed, therefore more evil than Bad Horse.
Man, fruitcake is made of pure evil and malice. Don't fuck with fruitcake:
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#followEd
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Haha, well, to be perfectly honest, if I had known everyone else was gonna do it...