Things I Like: Movie Edition · 6:14am Sep 15th, 2014
So the last couple of blog posts I made could be construed as mildly negative. I don;t really care if that bothers you, but I figured it would be a nice change of pace if I talked about things that I actually feel positively towards. We're coming up on Halloween pretty soon, and that is by far one of my favorite holidays. We're also coming into Autumn, which is my favorite season, so I have a lot to be positive about. It did occur to me recently though that there are some things that I love that some people have never heard of. I was talking with my siblings about what some of our favorite horror movies were and pretty much everything they listed off were movies from the last thirty years. This wasn't surprising as neither of them have hit twenty yet, but it got me thinking about what some of my favorite movies were and how some people may have never even heard of them And apparently people love lists, so here is a list of my favorite horror movies, in no particular order.
1.) "Halloween" John Carpenter 1978 ~This ones a bit of a gimme. Even if you've never seen the original Halloween you've probably seen one of the sequels or the Rob Zombie reboot. As...interesting as Rob's take is on the legend of Michael Myers, I prefer the original movie. Not only is it the grand-daddy of all slasher movies, literally starting the craze that would burn all through the 80's and 90's, it's also a really good movie in it's own right. Yes it has a few things that we complain about now, like jump scares, suspenseful music, and mildly idiotic victims, but a lot of this stuff was fresh in 1979, so they don't go out of their way to over sell any of it. Halloween is a slasher movie in it's purest form, without the need to bring in overtly super natural elements or goofy gimmicks. (This unfortunately did occur in some of the sequels, to the point I can only recommend Halloween II. Everything after that is either unrelated, goofy, or both. Though if you just want a good laugh, watch Halloween III Season of the Witch. That movie is bonkers.)
Halloween is probably one of the first horror movies I ever watched by myself as a kid and still managed to be thoroughly entertained, even while being a little scared. Michael Myers is probably one of my favorite examples of the silent masked killer. He's just so cold and detached, it's like he's not even aware that what he's doing is hurting people. In a way, he's extremely innocent, and a lot of what sucks about the later movies is they strip that innocence away.
2.) "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" Tobe Hooper 1974 ~ If Halloween sparked the slasher phase, Chainsaw was the inspiration for the gorier version some refer to as Splatter. It was a movie that was reviled when it was first released and sparked a lot of conversations about how horror movies glorified misogyny, even though it's arguable that this is the movie that started the 'last girl' trope. This film is just as suspenseful as Halloween, without the thundering soundtrack. It doesn't need it. You just know something HORRIBLE is going to happen to all of the kids involved and the movie let's your mind populate the future with all the terrible possibilities before something even worse than you thought could happen actually does. This has some of my favorite kills in any horror movie ever, though no one actually dies in the more unsettling scenes this movie has to offer. (The sequels, like with Halloween, quickly deteriorate into some really goofy and gruesome stuff, but they're a bit more entertaining, if not for the faint of heart.)
Chainsaw is another movie I watched pretty young, and I'll admit I watched it because part of me thought that I wasn't supposed to. It really was a well done movie for having such a low budget. This is essentially the poster child for successful indie horror. The iconic Leatherface is about the only part of the series that has remained remotely consistent over the course of various reboots and re-imaginings. He too has a bit of innocence about him in the first movie, where his relatives basically beat and abuse him, even though he's by far the largest and strongest member of the extended family. And of course the inspiration of the chainsaw as a murder weapon was pure genius on Tobe Hooper's part. It wou7ld go on to be copied repeatedly over the next few decades.
3.)"The Thing" John Carpenter 1982 ~ You're going to see a lot of John Carpenter on this list I'm afraid, because he's done a lot of great movies. The Thing is exactly what you want from a paranoid, evil within kind of movie. It's also probably one of my favorite creature features, as the practical effects in this movie are as gorgeous as thy are gruesome. (To the point I think it actually looks much better than the 2011 prequel, though that movie was okay as prequels go.) One of the best things about this movie is the cast, with the great Wilford Brimley, excellent Keith David, and the fantastic Kurt Russell. Though a lot of this movie is reliant on suspense, there's some truly fantastic action sequences where Kurt Russell really gets to shine. There's also a real sense of claustrophobia and despair when the cast realize that their essentially cut off from any help in a freezing wasteland with a monster that could be inside any one of them.
One of the great things about this movie is they show it and The Shining every year at Halloween at the American observation station in Antarctica. That would be a really cool, but also maddeningly terrifying experience.
4.)"Killer Klowns From Outer Space" Stephen Chiodo 1988 ~ Changing things up a bit, this movie is probably one of the most ridiculous on this list. I mean the title itself pretty much gives away the fact that this movie is just one huge joke. On the other hand though, it actually does have some pretty gnarly kills, some real surprises, and an ending that's probably one of the happiest on this list. What's great about it, too, is that the cast rattle off these theories about what the 'klown's' even are. Aliens from another world that stopped at earth just to get a bite to eat? The inspiration for clowns dating back to the dark ages? Or just some creepy monsters that took on the form of clowns to lure in unsuspecting prey? Nothing ever gets confirmed, but you are absolutely free to wildly speculate! The movie also has a great sense of humor, even before the titular clowns show up. The theme songs fantastic too, as 80's theme songs go. Best moments could probably best be summed up as "What is he doing shadow puppets?" "What are you going to do with those pies?" and "Don't worry Dave, we just want to kill you".
There's been talk about this movie getting a reboot, but I almost don't want it to happen. The really creepy practical effects of the animatronic clown suits would be impossible to replicate in CGI, and there are some movies that just sort of only worked in the 80's.
5.) "The Fog" John Carpenter 1980 ~ This is probably one of my favorite takes on the 'the entire town is cursed!' trope. The movies a little silly, and a little dirtier than Halloween, but it's no less interesting. What's great about it is there are a little of little mundane moments where supernatual stuff just suddenly occurs out of the blue with no real explanation. Probably the best example of this is just the intro, where an old sea dog tells a group of boy scouts camping on the beach the story that the rest of the movies plot will be based around. It's a perfectly delivered chilling little tail and it immediately goes into all these weird and unexplained phenomena that occur around town after the witching hour. I don't want to give to much of this one away as half of the fun of the movie is figuring out what exactly is going on and why. (There was a remake of this movie. Do yourself a favor and don't watch it. Even if you decide the original is too old to be entertaining, don;t screw up and watch the 2005 version. It's just terrible.)
Beware the Fog! It's such a great line. This is one of my wife's favorite horror movies too, and one of the first that we watched together as a couple.
6.) "Alien" Ridelly Scott 1979 ~ Like a lot of movies on this list, this movie benefits from an overwhelming sense of suspense, claustrophobia, and paranoia. One single Xenomorph, the titular alien, caused more terror and fear than an entire army of the damn things in nearly every sequel that came after this movie. (not that Aliens wasn't a decent movie, but it was far more action than horror, and suffered fro ma somewhat clunky premise that I feel tried to explain WAY too much. It's just not one of James Cameron's better works.) The movie has two really great things going for it. One of course is the psycho sexual art of H. R. Giger, who has regrettably since passed, and his fantastic design of the Xenomorph costume. The other, of course, is the memorable acting of Sigorney Weaver as Ripley, easily one of the most bad ass, take charge heroines in any horror movie.
I am ashamed to admit that I actually watched this movie for the very first time just last year. I was most pleasantly rewarded for the wait though. My best friend, however, tells me his father taught him how to tie his shoes as a child by threatening to make him watch this movie until he got it right, playing snippets of the scene's with the alien every time he tried to give up. Good times.
7.) "Return of he Living Dead" Dan'O Bannon 1985 ~ The story goes that after John Russo and George Romero made night of the Living Dead, Russo retained the right to any titles containing 'Living Dead' while Romero kept the rights make his own series featuring 'the Dead'. Now I could make an entire blog post about the Night of the Living Dead and all it's fantastic sequels (seriously, even the reboots were pretty good) and probably will, but I think that's best left for another time. As it stands, I'm putting Return on this list, because it's where the Romero and Russo stories diverge and it's probably one of the best zombie movies you'll ever watch. The Living Dead of the title, aren't the usual shambling corpses that can be taken out by a well aimed shot to the head, oh no. These things keep living even when their in pieces! And what's worse, being dead HURTS, it hurts SO bad. and you know the only thing that can stop the pain? Why, fresh living brains of course! That's right, this is the movie that actually introduced the 'brains' trope to zombie horror. Romero's zombies may have become the more iconic version, but while they'll eat every piece of you and spread the infection like wildfire, the Living Dead zombies are smarter, stronger, faster, and almost indestructible. They literally drop a nuclear bomb on them at one point and that just spreads the disease around. Why? Because it's a chemical against, not a bacteria! And it's transmissible by air, water, bite, and even sexual intercourse. Don't ask how anyone knows that. (seriously, don't ask. The sequels to this movie are not as good as the 'of the Dead' series. It goes off the rails pretty fast, to the point the last movie in the series doesn't even really feature proper zombies.)
This is one of my wife's favorite zombie movies, mainly because the zombies are incredibly smart. One of the best bits in the movie is when paramedics arrive to help someone who's been injured and the zombies just swarm them. When the radio crackles and the dispatcher asks if everything is okay, a zombie simply says "send more paramedics" like he's ordering fricking take out! It's great.
8.) "Poltergeist" Tobe Hooper 1982 ~ This movie suffers from the same thing that makes it special, which is the weird dichotomy of Tobe Hooper and Steven Spielberg. Tobe, you may recall, was the mastermind behind Chainsaw, and was brought onto this project because of that. But a lot of the cast feels like it was Spielberg's show and Tobe was just sort of there in name only. Either way, the movie has a lot of weird, very Spielberg touches while reaching levels of darkness that I can really only attribute to Tobe. And that theme song! That awful, horrid, disturbing theme song! I can't listen to that thing and not immediately want to get the hell away. Now, the movie itself has a lot of silly moments, but it has some real shockers too. The mirror scene is probably one of the best (though it went on to inspire one of the worst sequels) and the family has a really believable dynamic. It's probably one of the better haunted house movies you could ever see, and it's pretty great that it's just set in these modern suburbs.
The really sad part of this series are all the real life violent murders. The older sister was strangled to death by her boyfriend and the child actor who played the youngest daughter died from a misdiagnosis that lead to septic shock and cardiac arrest. That actually creeped me out more than the movies when I found out about that. I wonder if anyone will die making the reboot?
9.) "Trick R Treat" Michael Dougherty 2007 ~ Let me start by saying I absolutely love anthology horror. Creep Show, Twilight Zone, Tales from the Crypt, hell even Tales from the Hood! Great, great stuff. But Trick R Treat is something special for me because I truly believe it was written by someone who loves Halloween as much as I do. The atmosphere, the music, the jokes, the scares. All of it is absolutely top notch. The fact it's got that kind of kooky feeling of 'is this disturbing or awesome' through out is a testament to just how great the writing really is. It doesn't hurt that the visuals are stunning, though the practical effects are a bit better than some of the less impressive CGI (sorry Sam, but you're just not that scary. You're cute, and that's okay! You're just kinda fugly without the mask on. Never should of taken it off.) If you've never seen Trick R Treat I highly recommend it. It's a great introduction to anthology horror and it's got a little something for all ages. (though the sexy werewolves may be a bit much for the younger audience or your parents.)
I was absolutely broken-hearted when I went to see it in theaters on the day it was meant to be released in 2007 and the theater staff acted like they had no idea what I was talking about. I didn't actually get a chance to watch it until it was released on video in 2009, though it was well worth the wait. This is pretty much the movie that really inspired and influenced Something Sweet to Bite. My siblings find this movie too scary to watch, which is weird. I guess it's a little too gory?
10.) "The Cabin in the Woods" Drew Goddard/Josh Weadon 2012 ~ This is the only satirical horror movie on this list, but it was too good for me to pass up, even if it is an over glorified deconstruction of almost every trope in horror of the more recent era. The Cabin in the woods has great comedy and you really end up caring about the characters both above and below the surface. The creature designs of some of the monsters in this are absolutely fantastic. (Though I really would've liked to have seen Kevin, and found out what his whole deal was.) This is another movie where I can't tell you too much about it as most of the fun is watching it and figuring out what's going on as you go along. If you've never seen this movie, do yourself a favor and don't read ANYTHING else about it before watching it. Don't even look up a trailer for it on youtube, because Lionsgate didn't have enough faith in the movie not to spoil the twist in the advertisements. The other thing that kinda sucks about it is that even though you find out what's going on, it raises WAY more questions than it ever answers, and a lot of the monsters are truly fascinating to the point you just wish they each could have their own 'cabin in the woods'.
This is actually a really thoughtful and entertaining love letter to the horror genre in general, even as it tears down the things we love and loath about it. My wife and I were lucky enough to see it in theaters and I had thankfully been able to keep her from finding out too much about the plot twists before we saw it.
Bonus ~
11.) "It" Tommy Lee Wallace/Stephen King 1990~This movie completely screwed me up as a kid. Honestly it's not even really all that good compared to the book! But my parents made me watch it with them when it first aired, and I was completely terrified of clowns for decades after that. I've only really gotten over it in the past few years, thanks in large part to Killer Klowns. I'd be remiss if I left this movie off the list though, because it manages to have truly terrifying moments without actually killing anyone. It's all about how terrifying childhood is, even once you become an adult. weird subject, right? But yeah, defiantly read the book on this one.
This is probably my sisters favorite horror movie. She has eclectic tastes though. She watched the 1999 remake of The Haunting back to back on repeat when she was a little girl when other kids were watching power rangers. I was sorta proud but sorta freaked out by that. My mom didn't seem to think anything was abnormal about it though. At least not then, when I was trying to get her to make it stop after the tenth time in as many days.
Honorable mentions:
Event Horizon, Hellrasier, Nosferatu, Gremlins, Slither, Friday the 13th, Army of Darkness, Scanners, At the Mountain of Madness, Screamers, Phantasm, Silence of the Lambs, 28 Days Later, Shaun of the Dead, Nightmare on Elm Street, Scream, Kolobos, The Shining, Children of the Corn, I know What you Did Last Summer, Urban Legends, Jeepers Creepers, They Live!, 30 Days of Night, Dog Soldiers, Resident Evil, Silent Hill, From Dusk til Dawn, Planet Terror, Virus, Deep Rising, The Gate, Strangeland, Repo Man, Sweeney Todd
If you have any horror movies you really liked, or if you happen to also like one of the movies on my list, feel free to share in the comments below. If you hate reading other peoples lists of things but want to make a list of your own and subject someone to it, feel free to leave a link to your blog in the comments as well.
> killer clowns from outer space...
Need more be said?
30 days of night scared the crap outta me when I was younger.
Still good though!