The Character Assassination of Daemon of Decay by the Coward Professor Plum · 5:44pm Sep 2nd, 2014
Because he's an honorless hack with no friends, I'm not surprised if you haven't seen THIS by that swine Professor Plum.
That's right: he's called me out in public to take part in the ALS Ice Bucket challenge. Because I'm a selfish git with little concern for other people, I normally would have been happy to ignore it. However, because he's done so in public and I am dependent upon public goodwill to maintain my sense of self worth, it seems I need to go through with the whole thing. Way to stab me in the back, Plum. I thought we were friends.
But I refuse to just donate a small amount quietly or do something boring on a terrible iPhone camera (looking at you, Plum). So, because I want to do something a little more flashy and relevant, I'm giving you all a chance to affect how you see me suffer hypothermia. Because any loser can wear a horse mask and pour tepid water on himself. It takes a real attention whore man to let the people decide!
The premise is simple: not only will I match the top three donations to the ALS Association on my own, but those three donators will also be able to get me to say or do something they want in my video response! So spread the word, because if I don't end up giving enough to shame Plum then I'm going to be very upset with all of you.
Now before it gets silly, just know I'll happily employ my veto before Regidar or Parasprite try to make me do something stupid and illegal - or before Obs makes me cut out my tongue for certain transgressions against him - so don't waste your vote on something obviously not going to happen. When in doubt, just ask
So to repeat: whatever the top three people who donate (and provide proof of said donation, via a receipt or screen shot) give to help with ALS research I will personally match AND will allow them to embarrass me further by making me say or do what they want on camera. So if you have always wanted me to empty my bank account and, I dunno, sing Old Man River while balancing on one foot and firing a Nerf gun into the air, now is your chance!
Any questions? Feel free to PM me.
-Derek (aka DoD)
PS: And Plum... if I ever make it back to England I'm gonna kick your ass for making me do all this. Seriously. From now on, my OTP is your ass and my foot.
I was actually going to suggest that you make a video of you having sex with me and put it on the internet.
But I guess you don't want to have sex with me.
Fine then.
2422387
Hush, darling. That's for private times.
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You might be amazed about the number of stories I haven't read. Or heard of.
There should be a vote on these blogs. A thumbs up and thumbs down thing.
This made my day, right here.
>inb4 people begin to write actual shipfics <3
This is going to end very badly.
I hated doing this during the summer, nearly passed out from how cold it was.
*prepares bucket*
2423291 Professor of Decay OTP
Just an fyi, I will be using that as a line. Because that it a masterpiece of an insult.