Button Mash is sort of sick of the world. He finds a weird artifact and makes the world his.
Button Mash is sick of the world. He finds a weird artifact and makes the world his own. He is enjoying his new world, oh yes he is, but will other weird things happen. (Contains ooc ponies and one curse word)
Hello! I'm Button Mash. I'm the best gamer in Equestria. It least I think I am. This world is terrible in many ways. First, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon ruined three years worth of process on Mission Equestria: Time Moves Slowly. Second, People think my mom is hot and want to date her. Third, I'm too chicken to tell Sweetie Belle I love her. Oh well. It was a regular Sunday.
"Moommmmm! I'm ready for schoooooolllll!" I yell, running into her room. She opens her bloodshot eyes.
"Button! Go back to sleep! It's Sunday!" She goes back to sleep.
"I'm gonna go find a weird and mysterious artifact which I know nothing about other than what it looks like!"
"Yeah, yeah. Go ahead." My mom puts on ear plugs. I shrug.
I'm running around Ponyville, trying to find the CMC. They were supposed to try flying and needed Rumble. I ran to the big field. I see Sweetie Belle waving at me. I wave back. Rumble looks in my direction and flies over.
"Hey Button. What's up?" Rumble sticks out his hoof, but I don't shake it.
"I need help finding a artifact I know nothing about." I get a weird glare from him. By that time, Scootaloo, Apple Bloom, and Sweetie Belle have trotted over.
"Ya need what?" Apple Bloom asks.
"He needs help finding a artifact he knows nothing about. Duh!" Sweetie Belle said.
"It was a rhetorical question." Scootaloo said.
"Oh." Sweetie slightly blushed.
"So?" I looked at them. They all sighed and agreed. The Gamer Gang. Reunited. Well, we've seen each other each day.
We went to the Carousel Boutique. Rarity was inside.
"Um Rarity?"
"Yes, Sweetie Belle?" Rarity was rearranging her patterns.
"Can you repair our saddle bags?" Sweetie sheepishly asked.
"Mwah Ha Ha Ha!" Rarity Laughed. She gladly used her magic to fix them. She gave Sweetie one with a heart, Rumble the one with a grey cloud, Apple Bloom the one with a apple, Scootaloo the bag with Rainbow Dash on it, then I got the one with a direction pad on it. We thanked Rarity and left.
"To Twilight's Library!" Rumble yelled.
"Why?" Scootaloo asked.
"So it doesn't seem suspicious. If we got food, she would draw a conclusion that we are going on an adventure." I beamed at my smart idea. Scootaloo accepted my answer. Before we knew it, we were at the library.
"Oh hello! What do you need?" Twilight looked at the five. I handed her a paper Which had The Jewel of Karabina scribbled on it. She searched a shelf, pulling out five books on the subject.
"One for each of you!" Twilight added that five books were handed out. We left.
*** "To Sweet Apple Acres!" We galloped to the farm.
"Howdy!" Applejack greeted. We politely said hello.
"Can we have ten apples each?" Scootaloo asked.
"Sure. In tha barn, Sugarcube."
"Have you ever played Apple Buck Simulator?" I asked Applejack. She shook her head.
"Have you played Mareio Cart One?" I tried again.
"Eynope." She shook her head. I couldn't beleive that.
"Have you even played a video game?" Thought she was going to say no.
"Ah have. Ah have tha first ever Joyboy." She motion to my friends, who had apples for me. I ran to them and took the apples.
"Let's go to our homes and get our valuables and precious things. We meet at the CMC's clubhouse. Deal?" Rumble looked at us. I instantly shook my head yes. The crusaders said yes. We went our own separate ways.
*** I'm still sick of the world. Mom, if I don't come back within a day after finding this note, I am probably dead or missing. I need to find this weird artifact. Life is a video game, but I have one life left. Tell every pony I died in Kid World War. Tell Rarity I've always loved Sweetie Belle. Tell Applejack that her name, Applejack Apple, is stupid. My last words are I damn Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon to The Nether. Sincerely, Button Mash. I felt proud about my note. I put five Apple juice boxes, all of my hoove held games, and my laptop into my saddle bag. I trotted happily downstairs, kissed my mom, and went to the clubhouse. I knew I was ready.
I woke to my mom making pancakes. Huh. I thought. this never happens.
"Good morning, Button!" My mom came up the stairs with a present and card in her mouth. The card said Happy Birthday Button, with a picture of the CMC on it.
"Can I open it?" I look at my mom, Love Tap.
"After you eat your yummy breakfast I made!" She motions for me to follow her. I remember how this is happening. I touch my neck. The Jewel. When I get downstairs, the pancakes are still fresh. I began to eat. So good. So fluffy. So whipped creamy? My mom was slowly adding whipped cream to the pancakes. Finally, I finished. Present time!
"Button! Sweetie's here!" As soon as mom says that Sweetie whips out her laptop in front of me. We go on our Candy Wonderland server on Sweetie's. We turn on our High On Sugar mod pack.
"Hey, did you open the gift?" Sweetie squirmed.
"No." I place a sugar brick down.
"Open it then." Sweetie Belle nudges the gift.
"Okay." I start to open the red wrapping paper. Before I get a good look, Sweetie Belle kisses me on my lips. I turn Apple-iron-sweaty-in heat red. Sweetie Belle is baboon butt red. On Minecraft, her skin, a very pale woman with pink and purple hair put lots of tnt around me.
"Celestia dang it." Sweetie blew me up. Sweetie left.
"Alright class, today we are learning graphics!" Miss Cherilee announced. The lunch bell rang. I went out last. Things related to games? Awesome! The CMC were waiting for me.
"Hi! What's in yer lunch?" Apple Bloom nodded suggestively at my bag. I had the gift, along with a daisy sandwich. I lied.
"Uh.. Three daisy sandwiches. Yeah. Three daisy sandwiches!" I hoped they wouldn't be suspicious.
"Alright! Well ah have apples." Apple Bloom took a bite out of an apple. Rumble joined, talked a little, and ate in silence after that.
"Alright kids! Time for learning!" Miss Cherilee said. We went inside.
*** "Today was a great day, huh?" Scootaloo asked. All of us nodded.
"Sugarcube Corner?" Rumble asked. I could tell he was starving.
"Okay." I said. We trotted over to the local bakery. We ordered milkshakes.
"Milkshake race! Go!" I yelled. We all began to quickly drink our milkshakes.
"Ahhhhh!" We all fell on the floor, clutching our heads. It was nighttime. We said goodbye and left.
I love this world. It's my ideal world, so in a way, it's mine. Oh well. Goodnight Buttonville. Good night Buttonqustria.
I open my eyes. I'm in a dark room, laying on a bed. ooh! This is an escape level of a game! To escape! I bump into a wall.
"Mommmmmmmmmm!" I start to cry.
"Button? Button!" My mom clobbers me in hugs and kisses. Not that enjoyable. The CMC are here in five seconds.
"Button!" They yell in unison. Hugs, and showers of kisses from Sweetie Belle is all I feel. Rumble is now in the room.
"Button!" He yells. Can they only say my name? Oh well, at least Sweetie's kissing me.
"What. Is. Happening." I say.
"You slipped in a coma and we thought you were dead. Sweetie pointed out that your beanie was still spinning, signaling that you were alive." Rumble explained. I start to cry again.
"What's wrong?" Mom asks.
"M-my I-ideal w-world! It's gone! I never got to open the gift!" I start crying harder.
