During the Return of Harmony, Jake Fizzle and Flora Mistwing are having an adventure of their own...
While Twilight and her friends are off battling Discord, Jake Fizzle and Flora Mistwing are having an adventure of their own. They have been tasked with gathering up several dangerous magical objects which could threaten the lives and sanity of all the ponies in Equestria. However, Discord's shenanigans could make their job more difficult than they expected...
Co-written and edited by Dash-O-Salt, this Warehouse 13-inspired fanfiction takes place parallel to the Season 2 Premiere of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, and is a prelude to an upcoming series involving its respective characters and several other fancharacters created by some of my friends.
Twilight Sparkle groaned, looking up from her book and out the window. Had she been up all night? She ran her hooves through her black and purple mane, trying to wake herself up enough to think straight.
Bambambam. BANG! BANG! BANG!
"Okay, okay, I'm coming!" She yelled in frustration, squinting her eyes in the sunlight streaming through her study window. Time must have gotten away from her again.
Sitting up with some effort, she made her way over to the source of the calamitous racket.
"Twilight!" Pinkie Pie yelled as Twilight pushed the door open. "We have an emergency, it's-- Wow, what happened to you?" Pinkie's slightly panicked expression changed to one of mild concern as she surveyed Twilight’s disheveled demeanor.
"I spent the entire night reading." The purple unicorn replied in an exhausted tone. "What's the problem?"
"Uh, I think we can handle it. You should probably get some rest." Pinkie glanced nervously back in the direction of Sweet-Apple Acres, her poofy mane almost flat with distress.
Twilight rolled her eyes. "If you could handle it, why'd you knock on my door so loudly?"
Before her friend could reply, a sudden, urgent scream pierced her thoughts.
“Because maybe we can’t handle it?” Pinkie Pie managed to squeak out, pawing the ground softly with one foot. “We couldn’t handle it!” She put her hooves on Twilight’s shoulders, shaking her gently. “Help us please!”
Twilight narrowed her eyes at Pinkie. “I’m not sure what disaster you’ve managed to get into this time, but you can brief me on the way. Let's go!"
As the two ponies trotted along the road towards the Apple Family's orchard, Pinkie explained the situation.
"So, Applejack was gathering some apples, but suddenly the apples grew super big, and then the corn started popping like popcorn and - Ohmygosh chocolate rain!!!" The pink mare turned on a dime, running towards a meadow where a cloud that appeared to be made of cotton candy was spurting out a stream of chocolate milk. It was a veritable downpour.
"Pinkie, we don't have time for this!!" Twilight groaned. Of course she'd go off and do something random.
Pinkie tasted the brownish substance, a gigantic grin reaching from ear to ear. “It’s chocolate, Twilight, my favorite!” She proceeded to lay back, her mouth spread ridiculously wide to catch as much as possible.
Up ahead she saw the Apple family racing around in a panic, trying to deal with a herd of bunnies which had grown incredibly long legs. Meanwhile, chocolate rain and popcorn was flying everywhere, contributing to the chaos. Twilight spotted Rainbow Dash overhead wrestling with sticky cotton candy clouds while yelling something about how the rain wasn't supposed to come until next week.
In a moment, she knew what she had to do. Maybe all her research last night wasn't as much of a waste as she had originally thought.
Twilight yelled, "Don't worry, everypony! I've learned a new spell that will fix everything!" She closed her eyes and began channeling. Her horn started to glow a bright purple as she gathered her mystical powers. Power flowed through the twists and turns of an invisible maze inside, forming a complex but distinct shape. Suddenly, a bright flash of light exploded outwards, enveloping everything in a blinding light. She willed that everything would return to normal, to undo any magical change that had been done. The light cleared, and...
Absolutely nothing had changed.
"I can't believe it." Twilight whispered, wide-eyed. "My fail-safe spell... failed!"
Meanwhile, deep within the folds of space and time, a strange figure watched the events as they unfolded. Tapping his chin with a clawed hand, he chuckled to himself, amused at all the chaos he had caused. All this confusion was genuinely delightful. He let out another laugh which slowly transformed into a high-pitched cackle.
Suddenly, he thought of something which cut his glee short.
He frowned. Even when she wasn't there, Celestia could ruin his fun. Perhaps it was about time he ruined something of hers as well. And he knew just what to do.
Discord snapped his fingers, releasing a wave of magic that danced in a chaotic, unpredictable pattern. A cloud of sparkles rapidly dispersed, revealing the Elements of Harmony clustered together in his hands.
He simply couldn't wait to see the look on her face when she realized they were gone.
Gone! That's the first thing Jacob Fizzle thought when he looked at the empty box, shaking his brown mane in distress. How could they have just disappeared? He lifted the box and stared underneath with a confused expression, his blue eyes staring intensely through bottle glasses. They couldn’t possibly have fallen out, and yet they were nowhere to be seen!
This must be his fault! He hadn't separated them properly. Their close proximity could have caused some kind of magical reaction, teleporting them randomly to an unknown location!
"They're gone, aren't they?" Flora Mistwing asked, the pale blue colored pegasus narrowing her sharp green eyes at Jake.
"Yep," Jake said with a sigh, annoyed that couldn’t figure it out on his own. His cutie mark, two interconnected gears, indicated that he had mechanical aptitude, but this certainly didn’t appear to be a mechanical problem.
"Well, let's go find them, then! No use staring at an empty box!” Flora said brusquely, her blond hair swirling as she spun towards the door. “We'll meet back here in 4 hours." She spread her wings and flew off before Jake could reply.
Jake glanced around the area once. Knowing Flora, she probably had a detailed plan for a systematic and efficient way to search the city. Maybe that’s why her cutie mark consisted of several clouds stuffed inside a cube – she was a real organized pony. He had a different idea, however. Logically, there were a couple of places close by that the artifacts may have gone. His first stop: Rarity's Boutique.
After the third time knocking on the door, he knew it was no use. Rarity simply wasn't home. Which was quite odd, considering that Jake distinctly remembered overhearing earlier that Rarity would be busy at her shop all day. Something very important must've come up. But what was it? It couldn’t have anything to do with the disappearance of the artifacts, could it?
His question was answered with a clap of thunder from a... wait, that couldn't be right. Was that cloud made of cotton candy? A bright flash of light slowly formed a gigantic, brilliant purple sphere which then promptly dissipated into nothing.
Jake galloped toward the explosion, but by the time he had reached the site of the incident, all ponies nearby had vanished. He sighed in disappointment. Where was everypony going in such a rush? Anypony who could perform a spell that powerful was definitely someone he wanted to meet, especially since they might have some idea where the artifacts might have gone.
Taking off his knapsack, he pulled out a strange device that looked like a metal detector. He waved it around in the air, his eyes widening in excitement as the device started to beep urgently. There was definitely a source of magic here, hidden underneath an inconspicuous mound of popcorn.
“A Vacuum Orb?” He stated rhetorically, picking up the strange blue object and placing it in his bag.
“A what?” A small voice questioned in an adorable country accent.
Startled by the interruption, Jake turned around to see a small yellow pony staring at him curiously with large brown eyes. Most ponies that saw him around in his machine shop back in Fillydelphia would be surprised to know that he had a soft spot for kids.
“What's a vacuum orb?” Applebloom asked again insistently. “And why are you taking it,” she asked with suspicion.
“It's kind of like a magical battery,” Jake replied with a smile, trying to defuse her inquisitiveness before he had to start explaining the Basic Theory of Magic. “It sucks in as much magic as it can get, from any nearby source, including any kind of spell.”
“Is that why Twilight's spell didn't work?”
Jake nodded. “And now I’m afraid I've got to take it back to a secret storage area, so it can't cause any more harm.”
“What's your name, mister?” Applebloom asked, getting visibly excited. “What do you do? Where is this secret storage facility? How many artifacts do you store there?” She put a hoof to her mouth as she thought. “Maybe I could…help you out! Cutie Mark Crusaders…magical scientist assistants! Yeah, that’s the ticket!”
Jake’s head was spinning at the verbal assault. “I’m Jake, I do magical research, it’s in a very special, secure and secret location, lots, and I don’t think that’s a good idea.” He did his best to be carefully vague. It wouldn’t do for outside parties to know too much.
Applebloom scrunched her eyes, doing her best to look adorably cute. "But then I'll never get my cutie mark! Please help us, mister, or we'll be stuck as blank flanks forever!" Tears threatened to well up as she used her most persuasive tone.
“I'm not going to be able to convince you to leave me alone, am I?” Jake asked with a sigh.
“Nope,” Applebloom replied with a little stamp of her hoof.
“Then I apologize in advance for this,” Jake said, pulling an odd contraption out of his bag. He pointed it at Appleboom, who promptly fainted.
“I hate having to do that.” He muttered to himself.
After nearly three hours of fruitless searching, Flora was beginning to question her search methodology. She had snapped out a grid pattern, and was slowly clearing each quadrant of the town. Surely there was no better way.
Half-heartedly, she held up her magic detector without much hope…and heard a small beep. She swung it over to the left a few inches, and the beeping accelerated. It didn’t take her long to trace the source of the energy to a single building.
Walking inside nonchalantly, she continued waving the detector around, trying to triangulate the artifact’s location. It took her almost half a minute to realize that Mr. and Mrs. Cake were staring at her.
“Is there a problem?” Flora asked with a raised eyebrow.
“I-I, um,” Mrs. Cake stammered, a bit confused. “What in the world is going on here?”
“Look,” Flora replied with an imperious wave of her hoof. “You're in danger. I don't have time for manners, and I certainly don't have time for questions. So if you'd kindly stand back and stay out of my way, I can do my job and possibly save your life.”
Stunned at her brusqueness, the Cakes made no further objections.
“Ah-ha!” Flora exclaimed, picking up a sparkling green octahedron. She slipped the object into a pocket on her backpack and walked out of the shop without another word.
As he rushed to get away from the scene (it probably wasn't a good idea to hang around when he'd just knocked a filly unconscious), Jake couldn't shake the feeling that there was something odd going on. It wasn't just the cotton candy clouds and flying popcorn, there was some kind of strange power in the air. He knew what magic felt like; he'd been in its presence plenty of times. This was similar, but somehow different.
He couldn't let himself get distracted from the task at hand, though. He had a hunch that Rarity wasn't going to be home for a long time. He might have to break in, as distasteful as that might be.
He shook his head in disbelief, disturbed at the number of crimes he would have to commit to keep Equestria safe. Assaulting a child and burglary were just two more things to add to his guilty conscience. At least it was for a good cause, or that’s what he kept telling himself.
With the help of his magic detector, he quickly deduced that there was indeed an artifact inside, and a powerful one at that. Perhaps it was THE powerful one. The one he'd been seeking for years. It was probably the one that had caused the others to disappear since that's all it ever did, as far as he could tell. Every time he got close to finding it the signature vanished into thin air. He wanted so badly to know how it worked. It must be more than just a simple teleportation spell – it seemed to always disappear when nopony was looking.
Jake looked around and tried to figure out the best way to get in. If only he had Whooves' sonic screwdriver, he could unlock the door with the press of a button. As it was, he had no lock-picking tools or time traveling devices.
Glancing at the door again, he was surprised to notice that it didn't have a lock. He had heard that Ponyville was a trusting community, but he'd never expected it to be quite this trusting. Either way, it worked to his advantage. He pushed the door open gently with his hoof, and heard a sharp hiss.
"Oh no," Jake groaned. Nopony had told him that Rarity had a cat.
***
Meanwhile, on the other side of town, Flora got lucky again. Admittedly, there may not have been much luck involved as the blaring dubstep could be heard from a long distance. She didn’t even need her detection system to help her find the problem, she thought with a wry smile as she stepped into Vinyl Scratch's DJ room.
"Hey, 'sup!" Vinyl gave a quick wave to Flora.
"You have to turn off the music! Those speakers are cursed!" Flora said frantically.
"Nah, these speakers work fine," Vinyl laughed. "They’re loud, just the way I like my music!"
"But they’re getting louder!" Flora retorted.
"What?"
"I SAID, they’re GETTING LOUDER!"
"WHAT?!?"
Flora growled in frustration and unplugged the speakers.
"Hey!!" Vinyl complained. "You can't just--"
Suddenly, the speakers started playing again, even louder than before.
"What did I tell you?" Flora tried to scream over the noise. "THE SPEAKERS ARE CURSED!"
She stuffed in a pair of earplugs and pulled out her magic neutralizer, attaching it to one of the speakers. With a shower of sparks and an audible pulse both ponies could feel in their bones, the sound suddenly ceased.
Vinyl gaped at the fantastic display, mildly annoyed at the interruption. "Whatever." She shrugged, removing her purple lenses. "Those were junk heap speakers. I've got spares in the back, anyways."
Flora pulled a device out and zapped the speakers, making them vanish into a temporary parallel universe for storage, then exited the room without another word. ***
Jake wasn't all that enthusiastic about animals, but for the most part they didn't bother him. For some reason, though, cats were different. He hated cats. They were always so solitary and rude, waving their tails around with an air of disdain.
Cats reciprocated his enmity, a fact made abundantly clear by Opalescence's violent reaction to Jake's intrusion. He could only gape in horror as the vicious feline lunged at him.
Three minutes and several painful scratches later, Jake stumbled out of the house with an odd stone tablet in his hooves. He took a moment to gasp for breath before stashing the object in his backpack. That was certainly quite an ordeal, but he had experienced worse...hadn't he?
Regardless, he had finally done it! He checked his watch. It was time to head back!
Something's odd, Jake thought as he walked on an odd checkered surface past several upside-down buildings and uprooted signs. He'd been in some weird places, but he knew Ponyville wasn't supposed to look like this. What could have caused it? Another artifact?
No, it was too powerful to be the work of a magical object. This was the work of a skilled mage, one that was maniacally evil, but skilled nonetheless. Hadn't he heard a legend before about something like this? He couldn't remember.
“Something is seriously wrong here,” he commented as he walked up to Flora. She replied with her signature look that some say could send Nightmare Moon herself flying back into space with shame. She preferred avoiding meaningless conversation when a steely eyed stare would do.
Jake, however, was unfazed. “So how many did you get?” He asked casually, as if they weren't surrounded by a sea of chaos and senselessness.
Flora held up the parallel storage device. “Two.”
Jake nodded. “Same here. That means we've got all three of them, plus a bonus!” He pulled out the tablet.
Flora's eyes widened. “No. That isn't-”
“It is.”
Both ponies ripped their gaze away from the impossible object as a flash of light blasted into the sky a few streets away. A rainbow then proceeded to bloom over the top of the town and split into two, creating a solid dome of magic around it in iridescent colors, which then promptly dissipated.
And just like that, everything was back to normal.
“DAMMIT!” Jake yelled, looking at his empty hooves. “Not again!”
The following quote from Jake Fizzle is a preview for a future sequel series: "Okay, so, before I explain what we do here at Sector Two, I need to explain to you how magical "artifacts" work.
When a spell is cast on an object, it often leaves a bit of residual magical energy inside of the object. This can cause the object to react to other magical energy in its environment. This energy usually fades away in a fairly short amount of time, and the effect dissipates with it. However, very powerful spells sometimes alter the molecular structure of their targets, causing a sort of magical magnetization. The object is thus transformed into a magic conductor not too unlike a unicorn's horn. It is optimized for one particular spell, but this can be a very complex one and is rarely anything remotely similar to the spell which magnetized it. The object not only reacts to magical energy, but also certain types of brainwaves comparable to those of a unicorn casting a spell. Believe it or not, these types of waves actually emanate from non-unicorn ponies fairly often, so much so that the object might as well simply react to their presence.
In layman's terms, a thing gets zapped by magic and starts casting its own spells when other ponies are nearby. Needless to say, this can be extremely dangerous.
It's our job to locate these objects, [temporarily] neutralize them, and store them in this facility for safekeeping. It's a dangerous task, but someone's gotta do it to keep Equestria safe, and that's us. And it might be crazy, but...
