"I was a human once, I think. Now, for some reason, I'm a pony. The only reason that I know that I was once a human, are accounts of others and returning memories."
"I was a human once, I think. Now, for some reason, I'm a pony. The only reason that I know that I was once a human, are accounts of others, and returning memories."
Follow the story of a man self proclaimed as 'White Wind' as he makes his way through his subconscious and his new life as a pony, and tries to recover his real past.
For those reading this because of the sequel, please still read the sequel after you read this, even if you hate this story. Reason being, you read this to understand the sequel, so if you don't read the sequel, then you kind of wasted your time.
Edit: Changed the description of White Wind slightly.
I was falling. Not falling like someone-pushed-me-of-a-cliff falling, although I would have to say, that might be fun. Anyways, I was falling because I had jumped out of an airplane six kilometers up in the air. I know, the atmosphere up there is very thin, and it is extremely difficult to breath, but I love things that make my adrenalin pump. In simple words, I’m a dare devil, a thrill seeker, an adrenalin junky. Call me what you like. But I won’t stop doing it, and I won’t hate you no matter what you say to or about me.
Back to falling. I had my body completely perpendicular to the ground with my head back as so I can see the ground. I counted down. 4100, 4000, 3900, 3800… I could feel the atmosphere returning around me. 3500, 3400, 3300…
Down, down, down I went until something strange happened. Lights started to appear, and no, I wasn’t on anything, except for natural adrenalin, nor were they the type of lights you see when light headed. No, these were full on light that shifted colors, blinked, and they were collecting right in front of my head. Now, I also know that while this was awesome in so many ways, I was beginning to freak out, mostly because I had hit 1000 in my count, and it was time to deploy the parachute. Yanking on the cord, nothing happened. This sent my adrenalin sky rocketing (no pun intended). ‘Ok, not the first time this has happened,’ I though before I pulled the backup parachute cord. Again, nothing happened.
“Shit!” I yelled. My count was at 500. Time seamed to slow down at that point. 450, 400, 350, 300. I counted down by 50s this time and still, the lights were coming. 250, 200. ‘So this is how my life ends.’ 150, 100. “FUCK YOU WORLD!” My last memento to the world. Never once did I look away from the ground, or changed my position to try to slow my decent, even a little.
ZAP!!! I was millimeters from the ground when it happened, and no, the zap noise didn’t actually sound, I just added that part to make it sound cooler. I was up in the air again, although looking down I saw that the landscape had changed, dramatically, as well as the colors.
I saw below me, what I estimated about 500 meters, a group of birds, all different colors. “MOVE YOU FUCKING BIRDS!” I couldn’t help but yell at them, knowing that I would be in pain upon impacting them.
To my amazement, the birds just stopped in mid-air, and looked up at me. “GOD FUCKING DAMN YOU, BIRDS!” I couldn’t help it. I may like to feel adrenalin rushes, but I hate to feel pain. Ironic, I know. The birds didn’t move a single inch from where they floated so I attempted to change my course, but the birds stayed directly under me.
I felt it necessary to scream at them once more. “MOVE YOU FUCKING BASTARDS!!!” and to my amazement they did, even if it was to just huddle in a circle below me.
Again with the lights. They just wouldn’t leave me alone. Put my arms up in front of me to protect my face, and I was so stupefied by the sight, that I forgot that I was falling to my death. White fur, I saw white fur on my arms, and looking at my hands, I saw hooves instead.
Throwing out my arms, the birds under me must have finally gotten the idea to part and let me fall in peace. I spun, and spun, and spun until I decided to level out. Might as well enjoy falling to my death, again. Parting my limbs from each other, I felt my speed decrease at a substantial rate, like my parachute had finally opened. Looking behind me, I saw that I had wings. Wings about the length on my arms no less! I no longer felt the fear that I once had when falling at terminal velocities with no parachute, but the joy of soaring through the sky. It was like ecstasy, or so I have heard from friends, never been one to do drugs. I quickly did a spin while doing a back flip, getting use to the wings almost instantly, and then was nose diving again. I just continued to spin. I felt the air rush my body, make my hair whip back, and a strange sensation at my rear. Looking back I saw that I had a tail! The tail was as pure white as my arms but had red tips, and now that I was looking, the rest of me.
‘Ok,’ I thought, ‘I need to check my appearance.’ Looking around, I saw a town with a small river running through it. ‘That river looks so bright and blue. In fact, all buildings look bright and colorful.’ I idly thought to myself, even though I had come to this conclusion before.
I aimed for the center of the town, still spinning, still in my nose dive. Timing it perfectly, I did a 180 degree front flip, flapped my wings with incredible strength, and landed unharmed with a loud thud. I heard a gasp behind me, saw a pink pony that quickly dashed away, and was left slightly dumbfounded. Looking around, I saw that most everyone there was either a pony, unicorn, or pegasus. Things didn’t get weird until I was approached by a purple unicorn. Fine, I guess everything was weird, but I was living my dream of having wings. Who cares if I got turned into who knows what, I GOT WINGS! Anyways, purple unicorn.
“I haven’t seen you around here before. Are you new?” it asked. Again, I was dumbfounded. I stood there for about half a second before I straightened up, walked over to the unicorn in question, and proceeded to poke it in multiple places, while resting my head on one of my hand, hoof, thing, and ignoring the slight yelps of discomfort coming from it.
“Are you, *Yelp* alright? *Yelp* Will you, *Yelp* STOP THAT!” The horn of the unicorn started to glow as I continued to poke. Poke, Poke, Poke, Jab empty air, Jab empty air, Jab empty air, stop. Look around. “Are you done?”
Turning around, I see the same unicorn. Going up to it, and Poke, Poke, Poke. Stop. “How did you do that?” I asked, stopping my poking.
“Do what? Teleport?”
“Yah, that, and talk, and be colorful.” I listed the things I was confused about.
“Um, are you sure you are okay?” She looked at me like I was crazy. I knew it was a she because it sounded like one… I’m good at identifying gender through voice.
“I never said that I was, did I? I mean, I fell from around 20,000 feet, almost hit the ground, then fell another, who knows what. Then, I suddenly grow wings and am able to fly safely down. But I’m not saying that it wasn’t awesome to be able to fly down, but weird as hell. And lastly, I meet a unicorn, and a purple one at that, that can talk, and teleport. Over all I would say that I am, in fact, not alright.” I finished my tirade the same way I started it, completely calm.
“O~ka~y~ then. Follow me and you can get some rest.” She turned around and started to walk away, leaving me to catch up. “My name is Twilight Sparkle. What is your name?”
I decided to not use my real name and instead chose to use something random. “White ‘Bond’ Wind. I rarely use my full name. You still haven’t answered my questions.”
She took the name without hesitation, “Nice to meet you White Wind. I teleport using magic, and I’m born being able to speak, and am naturally colored, everypony should know those things. I mean, you, yourself are a pony, you should know this. Were you isolated from birth or something?” She asked the question like it was nothing, and, to be honest, I was slightly offended.
Despite being offended, I said sarcastically, “You could say something like that.” I got to tell you, when I came to this place, I was freaked the hell out, and when a blue, winged pony landed literally 3 feet in front of me and started talking, my head kind of just… shut down.
“That was totally awesome! The way you fell freely, the sudden stop, then back flip, the spinning nose dive, then that awesome landing! You have got to teach me that!” Like I said, my brain just shut down. I heard what it said, but registered none of it, nor registered the gender associated with it. “Uh, hello~?” It waved a hoof in front of my face, and I still didn’t register anything. “Is he alright?” it asked the purple pony. Did I say yet how my mind wasn’t registering anything? Yah, that goes for names too. I also might have fallen over at that point. Don’t know, told I that had.
“We should get him someplace to rest.” At this point, my mind not only reached the ‘loss-of-all-things-registering’ point and the ‘loss-of-motor-control’ point, but also the, ‘I-just-give-up-this-is your problem’ stage as well, causing me to go into a comatose like state. The next thing I know, I had come out of the ‘suspended’ state that my mind decided to use when it shut down, and found myself in a bed within a library, the last thing I could remember before that was, White Wind, Magic, and being born talking.
“WERE AM I, AND WHY IS THERE A BED IN A LIBRARY!” I started with a yell that shattered the windows. Okay, fine, they didn’t shatter the windows, but they shook them quite ferociously. Alright, alright, they only mildly shook. You know what! If you want the truth, then ask someone else! I like to be a bit over dramatic sometimes. But if you must know, they didn’t shake at all from the shout. You happy now? Too bad.
“You are in my room. I live in a library. It’s good to see that you are awake Mr. White Wind.”
“Please, if you are going to use ‘Mr.’ then call me Mr. Bond,” I corrected her slightly. God how I love the 007 movies. Being able to use James Bond’s last name was a dream come true. Now, back to my original goal for landing, “Do you have a mirror I could use? I need to check something.”
“My friend, Rainbow Dash, and I brought you here after you stopped responding and moving. And sure.”
“Who?” I asked as I watched her walk away.
“ME! Am I so uncool that somepony such as you would forget me?”
“What? Have we met before? Wait. Blue coat, rainbow mane. I think you were one of those damn birds that collected under me as I fell!”
“I’m not a bird! I’m a pegasus! And we collected under you to catch you… that is until we saw you change from whatever you were to this pony. Also, nice cutie mark. Never seen a pony with a tornado for a cutie mark before.”
“My what?”
“Oh yah, I’ve been meaning to ask you about that. How did you get a cutie mark like that?” Twilight returned with a mirror floating in front of her.
“My what?” I asked again, getting a response this time in the form of the two pointing at my butt. Looking where they were pointing, I saw that I, in fact, did have a tattoo like thing on my butt, and it was, in fact, of a tornado. I took the mirror that was floating in front of me now, and wondered how the hell I was able to take it with a hoof. I ended up staring at the hoof and handle for a few minutes before being snapped out of my trance.
“Are you alright?” the familiar voice from the purple pony rang out.
“Hu,” looking up, I saw two ponies with worried expressions on their faces, which confused the hell out of me. Again. “I think I answered this yesterday, no I am not. Although I did get better a little when my brain reset itself as to cope with this situation. I’m not dead am I?”
“No, you are not dead.” Twilight replied once more.
I actually looked in the mirror this time and saw something that I kind of knew, but had yet to confirm. “HOLY SHIT I’M A PURE WHITE PEGASUS!” Again I stared in the mirror for a while.
“Well duh.” Rainbow dash said with emphasis on the ‘duh’.
“Okay… brain shutting down again. Estimated time before re-boot, one hour. Estimated time for memory to adjust itself to current situation, 24 hours. Do not disturb, else memory damage will happen. Good Bye.” I said with a robotic undertone before collapsing for a second time.
‘Reboot complete, commencing with memory look-over, estimated time till completion, 24 hours. Order, newest to oldest. Multitasking mode initiated. New estimated completion time, 20 hours. Multitasking set. Names and Events, Start.’ The final command rang throughout my head. I don’t know why my brain decided to go through the process like this but it did. ‘World, Pony, Unicorn, And Pegasus Based. Blue Pegasus, Rainbow Dash, Female. Occupation And Background, Both Unknown. Purple Unicorn, Twilight Sparkles, Female, Occupation, Librarian, Background, Unknown. Pink Pony, Name, Gender, Occupation, and Background, All Unknown. White Pegasus, White ‘Bond’ Wind, Me, Dare Devil, Occupa--- Error, Disruption Occurring, Memory Bank, Deleted.’
“Come on, wake up!” a voice disturbed me from my sleep. Don’t know what I was dreaming about, but it must have been something awful because I awoke with a massive headache. “Wake Up! You’re late.”
Being told that I was late got me bolting up right away. “Late! For what!” I replied, wide eyed in panic.
“Follow me.” It whispered urgently. Looking at were the source came from, I saw a pink pony. Now where have I seen a pink pony before…? Oh yah, she gasped at me.
I followed this pony, still in a state of panic for what I might be late for. I don’t know, had I planned something with this individual? I just can’t remember. Remember, remember, remem… I couldn’t remember anything since after, well, since after I landed in this town.
I stopped dead in my tracks. I literally think that my heart stopped for a few moments before I felt the steady thump in my chest. No? My heart didn’t stop, but I was just becoming aware of its beat? Yah right. Anyways, me stopping. It caused the pink pony to stop, turn around and speak. Allowing me to realize that this pony, too, was a girl.
“Hurry up, we’re late as it is.” I have to admit, this pony sure knew how to make me panic.
‘How did I know this girl? Why couldn’t I remember anything? How do I get to know this girl’s name without her knowing that I didn’t remember her name?’ My mind was going a mile a minute, causing my hooves to do the same without me realizing it.
“Wow! Someone sure hates to be late. Right through those doors.” She pointed towards the doors of a building right in the center of town, while right next to me. I rushed in, and jumped while almost having a panic/fright induced heart attack.
“SURPRISE!” I think nearly everypony within this town was there yelling at me, a single word, at once. The color drained from me causing my already pure white fur to glow brighter than the sun. Okay, fine, I didn’t glow brighter than the sun, but I was glowing quite brightly. Alright, alright, I only…Wow… Déjà vu. But why?
Lost in my sense of Déjà vu, I didn’t notice when all the ponies gathered around me asking me questions, until it was too late to avoid it.
“What’s your name?”
“Were did you come from?”
“How long do you plan to stay?”
“When did you get here?”
“What’s your favorite food?”
“Were do you live?”
The sudden ambush of ponies with questions that I, for some reason, couldn’t answer, overwhelmed me. I started to huddle down a bit. You know, curl up in a ball with your hooves over your head. The ponies, for whatever reason, viewed this as an opportunity to ask more questions or something. Yah, luckily, Rainbow Dash found me and told everypony to back off. I then heard Twilight Sparkles announce that the party was over.
Everypony was leaving, even the pink one, when Twilight said, “Pinky Pie, you stay here.” The pink one stopped and walked back. Thank God I had an opportunity to learn her name. “Pinky Pie, we told you to not disturb this pony. He said something that worried me before he collapsed, and now I’m not sure if what he said could be true.” Twilight, I learned, when in the mood, can give a really good scolding. Not even joking this time. Twilight then turned to me, “So, what do you remember?”
“Wait, what? Why ask me that question?”
“It’s because you said, and I quote, ‘Do not disturb, else memory damage will happen.’ I’m just worried about you, even Rainbow Dash.”
“Am not!”
“Even if she won’t admit it, she is. So that brings us back to my question, what do you remember?”
“I remember,” I began, “I remember landing from what I can only guess was an awesome nose dive, Pinky Pie, gasping at me, then running away, then you greeting me, then me waking up in your bed,”
“Wait, you brought him into your bed? I thought we just set him down on one of the benches.” Rainbow Dash interrupted me, but brought up a good point that I pursued.
“Wait, what Rainbow Dash just said. Why did you move me to your bed? It couldn’t be that you…” I let my voice trail off, and put a look of panic on my face, and shuttered. I know I was only doing it to mess with her, but the reaction I got was so pure hilarious, that I burst out laughing only a few seconds later, breaking my charade.
“I-I,” Twilight stammered, her face turning deep red, “I only wanted to study him and his cutie mark and wanted him to be comfortable.”
If you can’t guess, this is where I burst out laughing, making her go from red with embarrassment, to red with anger from realizing that I was messing with her. “Anyways, memories, I remember Rainbow Dash, and I also remember that my name is White Wind. That is pretty much all I can remember.”
At this moment, a dragon walked in, scaring the crap out of me. It must have thought that it was funny, because it started *Roaring* at me, which was actually very adorably.
“Spike, stop that, why are you here?” Twilight to the rescue.
“Sorry, oh yah, a letter from Princess Celestia arrived for you.”
“Wait, Princess? You know the Princess of a country? Who are you?”
Twilight ignored my question in order to read the letter, so I only half listened, “Blah, blah, blah, Princess Celestia, blah, blah, blah, The Grand Galloping Gala on the 21st day, blah, blah, blah, invites you and one guest.”
“The Grand Galloping Gala!” All three ponies said excitedly.
“That’s like, the most awesome event ever! The Wonderbolts will be preforming there!” Rainbow Dash was the first to continue.
“The who?” I asked.
“The Wonderbolts! The most awesome of awesome flyers in all of Equestria! Wind, you have got to teach me that landing thing! It would be perfect! Twilight, you just have to take me!”
“No you have to take me! The Gala is the most ooper dooper party ever!”
“But Celestia only sent me two tickets, which means that only one of you can come.” Twilight said, pointing out the obvious.
“Why don’t you just ask her to send you more tickets? She is the ruler of this land, she could probably get her hooves on another ticket.”
“I can’t ask the princess for another ticket! That is just rude! Oh if only I knew who to pick.”
I just left at this point. I didn’t know what they were talking about, and I didn’t really care. “Hey Rainbow Dash, come on, I’ll show you my landing. I think I remember what I did. I also won’t offer this twice.” Without waiting for a reply, I walked outside, and took off, enjoying the air rush past me as I flew higher and higher. I flew until I felt the air get extremely thin, and it became difficult to breathe. Looking down, I saw something that surprised me, I could see the entirety of the land. I must have been at least 10 kilometers high.
Suddenly, my brain hurt and I shut my eyes. *‘I felt thin air around me, and air rushing past me.’* Opening my eyes, I saw that I hadn’t moved from where I was. The pain was gone. Shaking off the feeling, I dove, head first. I was a strait, aerodynamic line except for my wings, which were out slightly to give me balance and control. Shifting my wings slightly, I ended up doing a pin wheel spin. Evening out once more, I went back into my nose dive. I brought out my wings as to I formed the kind of plus shape that a plane had.
‘Wait, plane. What was that? Why did I compare myself to it?’ Sudden brain pains are painful. *‘I could hear the engine roaring, a voice telling me that it was time to jump, and I did, I went into a nose dive after I jumped, but with my arms in front of me. I had, hands?’* I could feel my adrenalin pumping through me. I focused back as the pains stopped.
I did an incredibly tight loop, then another, then another. Picking up a slight amount of speed each time. After about the fifth time, I shot down at the ground, going faster than I have before. I counted in meters. 7100, 6900, 6700, 6500… I was counting the numbers every two seconds, leaving me to go 100 meters a second. The air pressure around me gathered and I felt my ears start to bleed. I ignored it.
I started to spin, creating a mini tornado as I flew down, spinning faster and faster. The tornado grew until it was about 5 times my size, then held the steady size. I felt an opening in the bottom of the tornado, allowing me to see. I pushed further, causing me to start to exit the spinning air. My back hooves got ‘caught’ in the tornado and I couldn’t get them past. At least it didn’t hinder me. I continued my onslaught to the ground. My head started hurting again as I approached the ground. *‘lights were appearing around me, I was barely at the ground when they all gathered, and I was in the sky again’*
This time, I couldn’t shake the memory off. It just felt, strange. I started to wonder what I truly was. I then found myself close to the ground. 600 meters to be exact, and I would hit in less than six seconds. Five, four, three, two. I waited till the very last second before impact to adjust my flight and land the same way I landed the last time, in the same spot even. The only difference was that I landed on my hind legs this time. The shock wave that was sent out, rattled the buildings, and no, this time it wasn’t an exaggeration. The following tornado that hit, literally crumpled into the ground, throwing up dust, and anything that was not nailed down, back. I didn’t move until the dust settled. I could feel the adrenalin pumping at an all-time high. Everything felt slow. It took seven minutes for the dust to settle, although it felt like half an hour.
The dust cleared and every pony in Ponyville, as well as several pegasi, were gathered around. They saw me standing upright easily, still a pegasus, and with blood running out of my ears, and were all dumbstruck by my entrance. I quickly saw Rainbow Dash in front of me, and I called out, “You get that Rainbow Dash?”
The only reply I got from her, and most of the ponies nodded in agreement when she spoke, was, “Who... No... What are you?”
The dust cleared and every pony in Ponyville and many more pegasi were gathered around. They saw me standing upright easily, still a pegasus, and with blood running out of my ears, and were all dumbstruck by my entrance. I quickly saw Rainbow Dash in front of me, and I called out, “You get that Rainbow Dash?”
The only reply I got from her, and most of the ponies nodded in agreement when she spoke, was, “Who… No… What are you?”
I said the only thing I could, “I-I don’t know.” Then I heard the whispers, the criticizing whispers, and I couldn’t take it. I gathered up tension within my hind legs by crouching. Releasing the tension, I jumped, opening my wings when I reached the apex of my jump, and flew away. I didn’t know where I was flying, nor did I care. I just, for some reason, had to escape. My head started to pound once more, and I started to loathe it. *’There were creatures all around me, somehow familiar, yet completely unknown. They were talking. Talking about me and how I just landed in the road. I looked behind me to see these large metal things, and a lot of fabric behind me. I remembered the workings of the fabric. But still I heard the whispers. They were mortifying me. But why? I have never been mortified after a stunt before. I ran.’*
My headache stopped with this last pretense of memory. Where had I seen the shape of those creatures before? What were they?
It was like a light went off in my head. They were called humans. But I still didn’t know where I had seen them before. To this, I had no answer.
I stopped flying and turned towards where I had just left. I couldn’t see the town, but I did see a blue pegasus with a rainbow mane chasing after me. I didn’t want to be bothered right now so I continued to fly, but made it a contest of endurance as well. I flew at a 45 degree angle to the ground, making my way up while still flying away. I saw a large mountain in front of me and knew I would have to get above it to escape.
*‘The sun was going down, and I was rushing through a forest. I had a single pursuer, trying desperately to catch up, but I wouldn’t have any of it. So I just continued to run. I heard my pursuer behind me call out, but I couldn’t hear what was said. I found a cave and hid, covering the hole to make it difficult to find.’* The pain that the surfacing memory had created, caused me to slow down.
I looked behind me to see Rainbow Dash catching up, making me strive to go faster. I adjusted my angle to one of 60 degrees. I was about a kilometer away from the mountain, 4 kilometers up, and still had half the mountain to climb.
I initiated evasive maneuvers, which included doing a tight loop, and head into nose dive right at my pursuer, who didn’t back off. Right before we collided, I dove under her, did another loop, and landed on her back, pushing off. This caused her to fall, unable to regain altitude when she leveled out, and by the time she was able to regain control, I was already near the top of the mountain, and she was only one fourth of the way up, starting to climb.
I continued to gain altitude right above the mountain till the air got thin again, but still continued. I climbed to about 15 kilometers before the air finally got too thin to support me well, and I dove. My nose started to bleed, and I did a 10 loops to gain speed, each time, letting loose droplets of blood. I dove going much faster than last time. I spun, but didn’t see the tornado that I was hoping to create, I didn’t even think to look behind me. I heard a large bang, and thought nothing of it as I started going much faster. I reached the top of the mountain and started to fly circles around it, as I flew towards the ground.
I reached the bottom of the mountain, stopping my spinning, and flew just above the trees, finally slowing down. I looked behind me to see something incredible. A tempest was surrounding the entirety of the mountain, and as if my some unseen force was held there. Trees were getting pulled up and large rocks were flying around as well. I stayed put as everything around me was pulled in.
My heart nearly skipped a beat as I saw something blue flash very briefly within the thing I had created. My head started to pound as I raced to the spinning air. *‘I was hidden within the cave. I saw my pursuer stop and look around. It was a female and someone important to me. We heard a snap come from opposite the cave and where she was. A large cat stalked out. The person who was pursuing me, screamed and the cat jumped, biting down of her neck. The scream stopped, and I rushed out of my hiding place, scaring the cat away. I rush towards to injured, and wept, vowing to never react like I had when being criticized.’*
I rushed into the tornado, avoiding the debris that was inside of it. I saw my target, trying desperately to fight the wind and fly correctly. She was covered in blood. I grabbed her and finally felt the force of the wind. I struggled out of the thing I created and as soon as I did, it disappeared, and everything crashed down with a large bang. I looked down at Rainbow Dash, blood and tears dripping down onto her, and found her unconscious. Struggled to stop the tears, only to have more pour out.
I flew quickly and solemnly back to Ponyville, the wind to my back, speeding us up. When I got there, we must have looked a mess because several ponies rushed to us as I collapsed from exhaustion and blood loss. I hadn’t stopped bleeding on my way back.
The next thing I know, I wake up in a hospital, with Rainbow Dash next to me, asleep on a stool. I breathed easily when I saw her, and realized that I had been panting while asleep. Smiling, I was about to turn on my side to look watch her sleep, but At that moment though, Twilight Sparkle, Pinkie Pie, and 3 other ponies I didn’t recognize walked in, forcing me to shut my eyes, and not move so that they wouldn’t noticed me awake.
“Rainbow Dash,” one of them I didn’t know whispered, “Rainbow Dash, wake up! It’s been three days since you came back unconscious and you haven’t even left his side.”
I guess that Rainbow Dash had woken up since this mysterious pony started talking like she was, and sure enough, I was right. “I can’t help it, he saved me. I wasn’t even hurt coming out of that tornado. I can’t explain it, but when he saved me, just before I went unconscious, I saw him, crying, and covered in blood.”
At this point, I decided to stir, not wanting to drag back that painful memory. “Uuuhhhhgggg,” I moaned, then grabbed at my head like I had just woken up with a terrible headache, “What happened?”
I had one hoof on my head, the other reaching out in front of me, which one pony grabbed to help me up. Finally opening my eyes for the group to see, I saw the three ponies that I didn’t recognize intermingled with the three I did know, and was curious about them. So I asked in a polite, yet questioning tone, “Who are you three?
“My name is Rarity,” the white and purple unicorn said, “It is nice to make your acquaintance.” Female, I categorized.
“The pleasure is all mine,” I replied, “And you may be?” I asked the orange and yellow pony.
“Mah name is Applejack. Ah appreciate you bringing Rainbow Dash back.” Female, I also categorized.
“Nice to meet you Applejack, and don’t worry about it.” I turned to the final pony, who had suddenly disappeared. “Hu, I wonder where the other pony went. I swear that it wasn’t my imagination that there were six here, was it?”
“No, no… I’m here… I’m just… hiding.” The voice whispered, barely audible. I categorized this one as ‘Female’ as well.
“Now why don’t you come on out,” I said soothingly, “I won’t hurt you, I promise.” The pony just stayed put, not saying a word, so I added, “Please come out, I would like to see the pony that this sweet little voice is coming from, and learn her name.”
I was finally able to prompt this pony out, who turned out to be a yellow and pink pegasus. “My… My name is… is Fluttershy.”
Either this pegasus had a stuttering problem, or was extremely shy. I went with the second one and decided on soothing her. I waved her over as so I could whisper in her ear. She was very hesitant, confirming my guess. When she got near and leaned in I whispered to her, “Don’t tell anypony but,” I looked around the room before continuing. “I was also as shy as you once, and it’s still so.”
“Really?” she loudly whispered. I nodded, then waved her back over, as she had backed away slightly.
“Yah,” I continued, “Want to know how I was able to get past it?” she nodded vigorously, and I looked around again, noting that everypony was looking at us with curious eyes. “I realized that most everypony here doesn’t want to hurt me, and just wants to be friends, and so far, that is true. Not one pony I have met has wanted to harm me in any way.” I was only half lying to her. I wasn’t that shy a pony, but so far, everypony I have met, in example, the six in front of me, has been kind.
Fluttershy had seemed to cheer up dramatically, and when one of her friends asked what we were just talking about, she just tightened her lips, and shook her head, indicating that it was a secret.
I decided to take the initiative again at this point to get conversation rolling again, “So, how long have I been out?” was what I asked, even though I knew the answer.
“Three days,” Rainbow Dash was the one to supply the answer. I just nodded slowly.
Twilight decided that now was a good time to share some information with me. “You know, White Wind, we are all going to the Grand Galloping Gala. I had sent the Princess a letter with the tickets back, and I mentioned you. She sent us back 7 tickets, one for each of us here, and she is looking forward to meeting you.”
“I was right you know, about her sending extra tickets if you asked, but a meeting with royalty… scary.” I said half-heartedly and slightly sarcastically.
“Princess Celestia is not scary, she is the kind and thoughtful ruler of Equestria.” Twilight offered as a rebuttal.
“Somepony obviously didn’t catch the sarcasm that I put in my words.” To this, most of the ponies in the room snickered. “Anyways, time for me to go do something. Although I need a source of income. What jobs are there to do around here?”
Rainbow Dash was quick to offer a solution to my money problem. “You could join the Weather Patrol.”
“The What Patrol?” I asked quite confused.
“The Weather Patrol. They make sure that the weather is on schedule and correct,” Twilight was the one to elaborate on this.
“Oh. Sure, I’ll join. It could be a good experience for me.”
“Anyways, time for me to go do something. What jobs are there to do around here?” I stated, still in a hospital bed.
Rainbow Dash was quick to offer a solution. “You could join Weather Patrol. They make sure that the weather is accurate to the schedule.”
“Sure, I’ll join. It could be a good experience for me.” I started to get out of the bed, prompting the six ponies around me to try to either stop me, or support me, but I just pushed them off and stood up. “I’m sorry but,” I took a deep breath before continuing. “I will need to stay at one of your houses until I can find and pay for a place of my own.”
Again, Rainbow Dash was the one to offer. “You can stay at my house, after all, I am the one hiring you.”
“I will pay for the trouble of housing me when I get the bits I promise. Wait, what? You lead the Weather Patrol?”
“Well duh, I am the best flyer ever. It’s only natural that I am in charge of Ponyville’s weather. And don’t worry about paying me back for the lodging, I’m more than happy to help a friend out.”
“Um sure, thanks Rainbow Dash. Wow, first a job, and now a place to stay. After this, I think I owe you a favor or something.” I said sincerely.
Rainbow Dash had the slightest of blushes, scarcely visible on her blue coat, but it was there. “Dude, seriously? Think nothing of it”
“I will think something of it. After all the trouble you are going through to help me, I feel like I have at least some obligation to help you in some way.” Rainbow Dash started to blush even harder, “Are you ok? Your face is turning red.” As I said this, I put the back of my hoof on her forehead to check for a temperature. I think this caused her to blush even more, but I don’t know.
“I-I’m fine.” Rainbow Dash said, batting away my hoof, “Anyways, we should get going, the sky isn’t going to clear itself.” She turned to walk out of the room and saw the uncomfortableness on everypony’s face. “What? Can’t a pony walk out of a hospital?” she said before making her way past them. I simply just followed, ignoring the questioning glances that I got.
Once outside, I asked, “So, what do we do?”
“Well, first we are going to go to Cloudsdale to officially get you into the Weather Patrol. Second, we get you situated at my house and get you fed. You haven’t eaten for three days after all. Third, we clear the skies tomorrow.”
“Why not get to work today?”
“Because the sky is already clear, duh.”
“Oh, well, then what will we do as we wait?” I asked?
“I usually practice my stunts, but I can also show you around the town.”
“You just keep adding stuff that I will owe you for later don’t you.”
“I do not!” Rainbow Dash said defensively.
“Sure, sure. We should probably move from the hospital to Cloudsdale to get me in the Weather Patrol,” I said, pointing out that we were still at the hospital.
“Right, sorry, this way.” Rainbow Dash took off, leaving me to follow once more.
Cloudsdale is amazing. My first thought as it came into view. The whole thing had a large splay with an innumerable amount of pillars throughout, a rainbowfall that fell into the city over a distance of 500 meters, several waterfalls and another rainbowfall at the base, and the fact that it was at 11 kilometers in the air, simply topped the whole thing off.
Rainbow Dash lead me through the giant city. We passed several pegusi who were audibly whispering as we passed. I was perfectly fine about it, as I remembered the promise that I had made, but Rainbow Dash, after about the 6th group we passed, which was a group of 3, she couldn’t ignore it. “You guys shouldn’t judge him. He’s almost as good a flyer as I am.”
“Oh, that is quite the compliment from someone who is so self-centered. You can’t even do your Sonic Rainboom that you are so proud of.” one of them retorted. I decided I don’t care what ponies say about me, but that nopony will insult a pony that is helping me out. So I cut in.
“Says a pony that probably couldn’t even keep up with me, let alone Rainbow Dash here. Anyways, we have somewhere to be,” I started to walk away. “I’ll see you jerks in the center of Ponyville after I have officially get a job. That is, if you are pony enough to show.” With this, I was out of range for them to reasonably respond, and Rainbow Dash had to catch up.
“Dude that was epic. You handled them like they were nothing.” Rainbow Dash said, a slight tone of disbelief.
We didn’t share any more conversation after that, until after I was officially accepted and trained. And even then, not until we landed within the center of the town. We found a large group of ponies and pegasi alike. Apparently the three had spread the rumor of this challenge and said that they would win easily. “Are you sure you can take them? You haven’t eaten since you got here.” Rainbow Dash said, uncertainty in her voice.
“Great, thanks for mentioning my hunger. Wasn’t feeling it until now. It’s too late to back out of it now just to eat something.” This was true, but I still felt like calling out to anypony who would listen. “Can anypony please get me something to eat? I will owe them a favor later.”
“What’s wrong?” one of the three ponies that I had challenged called back. “You so scared that you would try to postpone this race by eating?”
“No, I’m just hungry. Not eating for three plus days can do that to a pony. And don’t worry, I would be eating whatever is brought to me, if something is, while we race. I have a fairly high metabolism so I would get the energy fairly quickly.” As I said this, a couple who I later learned was Mr. and Mrs. Cake, brought me a tray with six cupcakes on it.
“Thank you, I can either pay you back when I get the bit, or I can just do you a favor whenever you need it.” I offered. They just refused, but accepted when I kept insisting.
Turning back to the three, I took a bite out of the cupcake and said through the bite, “Damn, this is a good cupcake.” I swallowed and took another bite before continuing. “So, we race from here, to the gates of the apple field south west of here, then head north to the library, then we head to Cloudsdale. Lastly, we head strait above this point, level with Cloudsdale, before landing back here.” I took another bite of the cupcake, finishing it, before starting on my second. “How does that sound?”
“Sounds good to me.” The pony who kept speaking, to which I deduced was the leader, said.
I had finished my second cupcake when we lined up at the start. I was standing strait up, eating the third cupcake, and the tray in my other hoof. The second-to-last signal put out, the three I was facing were already flapping there wings, Rainbow Dash had appeared beside them.
My head started to pound, a familiar signal to me. *‘I was within a metal contraption, something around my head. I looked beside me and there were dozens of the same contraption besides me and in front of me. We were in a parking lot, about to head into the streets. A light was ahead of us was changing colors and I prepared.’*
When the start signal rang out, I just stood there finishing my third cupcake, watching the other four take off. When finished, I crouched, taking my time, and finally took off, ignoring the ponies screaming at me to move.
I was quick to move as the familiar wind was behind me, I caught up like I had taken off with them. I started my fourth cupcake before saying to the one I was directly behind, “Mind if I tag along?” the pony I was following turned around, confused to see me flying behind him so relaxed, eating a cupcake. My head started to pound again. Have I mentioned that I am starting to loath these headaches?
*‘The light turned green, and I just waited for all the contraptions, that I now recognized as cars, to pass the start line before going myself. I drove my foot slowly down, bringing the tires to a spin. I lifted my other foot, sending me forward at incredible speeds. I caught up to last place, ramming him into a much larger car that was sharing the road. I went passed all the 'obstacles', making my way, slowly, to the front’*
I went into instinct mode, my pupils shrank, giving me tunnel vision. I corkscrewed around my first opponent, reaching the apple field as I did. I looped right when I exited my corkscrew maneuver. The wind shifted as I turned around, making it difficult for the new last place to reach the sign. I finished the fourth cupcake.
Picking up speed, I caught up to my second opponent as we reached the library, the next ‘obstacle’. This one wanted to play more rough than the last one. He shoved me as I tried to go past, and kicked dirt into my eyes. I decided to return the favor, by slamming him through a window within the library. I adjusted my angle, bringing me towards Cloudsdale.
I found an uplift, bringing me near level with the city, but I was still several kilometers away. Most of my vertical travel taken care of, I focused on the horizontal travel. I started on the fifth cupcake. As I was about three-fourths the way there, I spotted Rainbow Dash and her opponent already at the city, turning around. As I passed them, the leader shoved Rainbow Dash, causing her to lose control. I grabbed her and tossed her back at her opponent, losing my cupcake. ‘Damn’ I thought, ‘a perfectly good cupcake, wasted.’ The thought lasted for half a second before I got back on track.
The headaches are so annoying. If I could choose, I would discard my memories to leave these headaches. *‘I was directly behind the lead car. Surpassing its speed with my own, I rammed the back, forcing our cars together and match speed. I turned, causing the other’s back to turn with me. The one in the other car, adjusted to the sudden loss of control to level out. We were now side to side, bashing each other’s cars together.’*
I once again looped, the wind following me once again. I was catching up to the two in the lead. Rainbow Dash was getting beat around, so I intervened. I grabbed the leader of the trio, and pulled him back. Rainbow Dash and I were now even in the race, and I started on my last cupcake. I pulled back slightly letting Rainbow Dash get the lead. All things done, it was the final stretch. Rainbow started her dive, gaining more and more speed, I started my own dive, looping several times before to gather speed. I rushed towards Rainbow, spotting that her hooves were even. I finished the last cupcake before I put my front hooves on her back ones, and pushed, causing a large bang to resound, and a rainbow to form. I slowed down once more and landed 20 seconds after Rainbow did.
Another headache came about, a lot less painful than last time though. *‘We were facing the finish line, two miles ahead. We would be there in a minute. I took my foot off the gas ever so slightly, stopping my acceleration. The other car passed me, finishing seconds before I did. The opponent stopped the car immediately after we passed the finish line, got out of the car, and pulled off the helmet. Underneath, I could clearly make out that the driver was a girl. I knew this girl… but from where? She approached my car and started pounding on the hood, demanding to know why I slowed down, saying that I would have won.’* I recognized the woman from that memory. She was the one that had died before me, my last memory set. I started to cry.
“Mr. and Mrs. Cake, Thank you for the cupcakes, they were delicious.” I said through the tears of the past.
I pushed Rainbow Dash into a Sonic Rainboom. Landing 20 seconds after her, a memory surfaced, causing two things to happen. First was that I remembered my first meeting with someone. The second was me crying when I realized that the person who I met, was the one who died in front of me due to stupid rage and humiliation.
I said out loud through the tears of the past, “Mr. and Mrs. Cake, Thank you for the cupcakes, they were delicious, although I ended up dropping one.” As if on cue, Pinkie Pie appeared beside me, carrying said half-eaten cupcake, unsoiled by dirt. “Thank you Pinkie Pie.” I said, still crying, while taking the cake and devouring the rest of the pastry.
With me still crying, Rainbow Dash came up to me and slapped me. Or hit me. Or, well, have you ever been hit by a hoof? I think that she was trying to slap me, but it felt like a punch. Anyways, she said something that made me laugh and wipe away my tears. “You stupid pony, you shouldn’t cry over pastries, besides, I’m the one who should be crying.”
I decided to play along and let the misunderstanding stand. “You’re right, let’s get going, we still have places to go, places and ponies to see.” We took off together just as the leader arrived, as well as the other two, from different directions. “So, where are we going?” I asked, causing us to stop.
“To my house, duh. We were so caught up in that challenge you set out, that we didn’t even get to get you situated in my house.”
“Oh, right. So where is your house?” To this, Rainbow just rolled her eyes and flew off, leaving me to follow again. When we arrived at her house, about eight kilometers up, I was shown literally four things: the entrance, the guest bathroom, the kitchen, and the living room, to which I was told I would be sleeping.
“Did I do something wrong?” I asked, “Because earlier, I felt like you were eager to show me your wonderful house, but now it feels like you are doing it out of obligation because you said you would.” I think I hit the nail on the head there. Slightly because she cringed, ever so slightly, and also because she had her back turned towards me.
When she turned around, I saw that she was holding back tears. “You are such an IDIOT!” she screamed, unable to hold back her tears. I would be lying if I said that I didn’t shrink back at the sudden yell, which only encouraged her to continue, “YOU THINK LOSING A CUPCAKE, OR A RACE IS SUCH A BIG DEAL THAT YOU GOT TO CRY OVER IT?! I SHOULD BE THE ONE CRYING,” although she already was, but I didn’t point it out. “YOU UPSTAGE ME IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE TOWN, AND MOST OF CLOUDSDALE. THEN YOU HELP ME ACHIEVE SOMETHING THAT I SHOULD BE ABLE TO DO MYSELF! AND FINALLY, YOU THROW THE RACE! I KNOW THAT YOU WOULD HAVE WON! YOU DIDN’T EVEN TAKE THE RACE SERIOUSLY!!” Again, I cringed. This time from the memory that had resurfaced during the race, and how this was exactly the same thing that happened in it. Not only that, but also from the knowledge that the one who said the exact same thing, died in my arms. I started crying again. “AGAIN WITH THE CRYING! WHAT DO YOU HAVE THAT NEEDS TO BE CRIED ABOUT!?!”
The answer that I gave in a low whisper and the actions I displayed made Rainbow Dash stop. “You wouldn’t understand, even if I told you.” With that, I walked out of her house, and disappeared. It technically wasn’t against my promise as I had not done a stunt.
Rainbow Dash stood there for a few minutes from what I guessed, but she eventually came around and chased after me. But by then, I was gone from her sight. She searched for me, sure, but she didn’t find me. Mostly because I hid in a place she didn’t think to look. Above her house, about 13 kilometers up total, on a cloud that I had formed. Sure it was difficult to breath, but I made do. After all, it did stop my tears.
I spent the next few days up on that cloud, not once moving, although the wind did move it quite a ways off from everything. It was then that I decided to build my house. It started out as a simple cube, about 10 feet by 10 feet by 10 feet. I made a bed with sheets, and a few items to fill the space. I could tell that a large group of ponies where looking for me, as I heard shouts from them. I think a few saw the cloud I hide in and tried to chase it, but it just gets blown away from them so that they can’t catch it. I then started to build other additions onto my cube, like a bathroom, complete with working toiletries (don’t even get me started on the complicated process of how it works and where the stuff goes), a living room, a few hallways, an patio on the back, some furniture to comfortably lounge about on, and all the while, keeping it within an ever growing cube shape that reached a maximum of 50X50X50 foot area, a nice place to fly around in at the top.
After about 20 days, I decided to make my appearance back in Ponyville. Floating along for almost two weeks in an uncatchable cube cloud that keeps growing, will start some rumors about it. You also will travel to many different places, and I think I had made it to almost every place in Equestria. Anyways, I used the rumors that had quickly developed to make some money by letting a few, select people into my house. They were skeptic at first, but when they tried to chase it, they learned that it was the real deal and were quick to offer me some bit for the rare opportunity to get in. Also, I hadn’t had a single memory flashback of my past.
Anyways, I decided to make my appearance back in Ponyville, disguised of course. I gathered some material and used it to die my coat and mane so that my mane was completely red, and my coat was pink. What? Don’t judge me, pink is an awesome color. I had also found a way of covering and changing my cutie mark. STICKERS AND SUPERGLUE! My new 'cutie mark' was one of a cloud by the way.
As I landed in Ponyville, I saw what my disappearance had done. The town was literally a wreck, with buildings that seemed to have been eaten, food was getting low, and there were ponies everywhere, running around. Okay, fine, maybe it was from the parasprite infestation that had rolled through not more than two hours ago, but hey, first impressions and all. I decided to ask one of the town’s people what happened. The response made my original train of thought go out the window and to parasprites. “I-It was t-terrible. They- they came and started eating all the food. Then something went by and they started eating all the buildings. Thank Celestia that they left.”
“Wow. Okay. Um, do know anything about a cubed cloud that no one can get close to? I’ve been tracking it, and it seems to have originated from around here. I also have heard that a pony named ‘White Wind’ disappeared from here around the same time it formed."
“Do you know anything about the pony White Wind?” I turned around to see Rainbow Dash floating no more than ten feet from me, a worried look upon her face.
“I may or may not know of this pony. I may or may not even chatted with this pony before, and I may or may not know how to get ahold of said pony. It all depends on who’s asking.” I offered.
“His friends are asking.” Twilight appeared next to Rainbow Dash as she said this, as well as the other four from the group.
“Really now? Because I heard from him that one of these ‘Friends’,” I put emphasis on the friends part, “a certain blue coated pegasus, seriously offended him. And while he did admit to doing stupid, thoughtless things, that it didn’t account for the cruel, thoughtless words that was said by this ‘Friend’. The five ponies, as well as those that have gathered around us, turned to look at Rainbow Dash. You know, I have noticed that whenever something happens, most of the ponies in the town gather.
Rainbow seamed to crack under all the watching eyes and guilt, “Okay, okay. Fine. I admit that in the heat of the moment, I might have said something that might have hurt him, causing him to leave.”
“Oh? And what did you say that made him leave?”
“I just asked him why he was crying.”
“That hardly seems a reason to just leave.”
“Okay, I kind of yelled it at him accusingly, if you see him, can you tell him that I’m sorry?” Rainbow Dash looked at me, a sense of guilt stuck in her eyes, as well as shame, and a sense of pleading as well. Her body language was like that of a dog who just did something bad, knew it, and was getting punished for it as well.
I just looked at her, in the eyes, with a cold expression on my face. After a good solid two minutes of this staring, Rainbow broke the eye contact first, unable to stand the pressure. “I accept your apology Rainbow Dash.” I stated simply, changing my expression from a cold one, to that of one of good mirth. “I wonder how you can make it up to me.”
While everypony was slightly confused at what just happened, Twilight was quick to point out the obvious. “You aren’t White Wind. Your colors are not even close to his.”
“Hair die my sweet Twilight.”
“Yah, and your cutie mark is completely different as well!” Pinkie Pie added.
“What, this thing?” I asked tugging slightly at the sticker to show that it wasn’t part of me. “A giant sticker, and super glue.”
“Then why did you come here asking about him if you were him the whole time?” Rainbow Dash asked.
“Simple. I wanted to know how you felt about the event without me being here, prompting you to do something stupid, Rainbow Dash. Now, if you all would be so kind as to follow me, I have prepared my house for a party.”
“OOO, a party, what kind of party!” Pinky Pie of course.
“A return / I’m sorry party. It’s also in a cloud that I have modified to allow earth ponies on.”
“How did you do that?” Twilight asked. I get the feeling that she does that a lot. Note to self, don’t hang out with Twilight for too long. Might get asked a ton of questions.
“You will see when you get there, now wait for a moment.” With that, I took off, going towards my cub house, which had not moved an inch since I went to Ponyville, no one had spotted it yet. I brought the cloud down to the town, surprising the town that it was the elusive cubed cloud. “ALRIGHT, EVERY PONY IN!” I yelled, but nopony moved. “Oh for Celestia’s sake, I PROMISE THAT NOPONY WILL FALL THROUGH.” Pinky Pie was the first to step up onto the cloud stairs, which lead to the main door. And with that everypony gasped, but reluctantly went onto the cloud. The pegasi present just flew in and everyone was surprised to see how well furnished, and open the place was.
“How did you do this?” Twilight asked. I knew it, she is a pony with infinite questions.
“Super condensed clouds and wooden planks within them. It was actually quite difficult to get the right density, too much and it turned water, too little, and the planks didn’t hold.” I walked away from Twilight, knowing she had many more question, and went to a DJ station that I had gotten. I plugged in my 128 GB Ipod that I had somehow found was on me, and started playing some good dance music, unknown to all the ponies. About halfway through the party, I realized that I hadn’t had a headache since I left. I went to my bedroom after putting the Ipod on auto play, it had been locked it since I had not properly treated it, went in, and relocked it. I sat on the bed and thought, ‘Why hadn’t I had a memory surface?’
The Party was halfway through, but I had a feeling that it would go much longer than intended. I realized something and put the Ipod hooked up to the DJ station, on auto play. I went into my room, free of all pony contact, and locked the door. I sat on the bed and thought, ‘Why hadn’t I had a memory surfaced in over 20 days?’ I stayed in that room for a good hour before I heard a knock on the bedroom door. “One moment,” I announced. I got up, and opened to door to see Rainbow Dash. Past her, I saw an absurd amount of ponies and pegasi, somehow fitting within my house, and still able to move about. “And?” I asked, knowing that she had a reason to disturb me.
“I want to know.” Rainbow Dash said
“Know what?”
“You said I wouldn’t understand. But I want to understand. I want to help you through stuff that makes you upset.”
A headache came on, this time it developed into a migraine. I stumbled back onto the bed, gripping my head and shutting my eyes. *‘I was within a house, one made out of wood. The doorbell rang, and I wasn’t expecting anyone. I was all set to go bungee-jumping and had finished putting together a meal. I answered the door with my pack on my shoulder, to see the woman from the race standing there. She invited herself in. “You avoided me yesterday and wouldn’t answer me. Why did you throw the race?” I could tell that she was mad. “I did it to prove that a being the better racer, doesn’t mean that you always win,” I told her, “Now if you will get out and excuse me, I have places to go.” I walked out of the house, looking behind me I saw the woman still in my house, but going into it further! “Hey! I said to get out!” I chased after her and blocked her way. “I believe that you are uninvited here. Now get out before I call the cops.” I threatened. “Yah right. Go ahead, I will just lie and say that you were beating me.” She shot back. I pulled out my phone and dialed 9-1-1, still trying to block her from going further in. “Yah, hello? I would like to report an unwanted entry into my home.”’* The memory stopped and I found Rainbow with a foreleg around me. I wasn’t crying this time, nor felt like crying.
“Are you ok?” Rainbow said, worry in her voice.
“Yah I’m fine. Are you sure you want to know why I was crying?” She nodded. I took a large breath. “I have been remembering my past. The things I have been remembering are about someone that I think I loved, and might still do. I ended up watching her die in my hands, and it was because of me that she died. Worst part about it, is that you remind me of her Rainbow, and I’m afraid. Afraid that I might fall in love with you, and end up losing you as well.” I finished, barely holding back tears at this point.
“Your right, and wrong. I don’t know what it is like to lose somepony like that, but I do know what it is like to lose somepony dear to me.” She left me to ponder her statement as she kept her foreleg around me.
Finally I said, “You know, I hear that there is a great party going on in a cloud house were all ponies are invited. Why don’t we join it?” Getting up, I walked to the door opening it, bowing at the hips, one foreleg over my chest, the other extended towards the door and my head down. “After you M’lady.”
Rainbow passed me and stood in the doorway, looked back at me with judging eyes before taking my extended hoof and said, “Lets.”
I closed and locked the door behind us, then looked at the party. A few different DJ ponies had taken over the DJ responsibilities from my Ipod and were currently having a multi-way DJ battle. I decided to do something about the music situation though. As they were about to change control, I lowered the volume on the speaker sets the other DJs controlled, started playing ‘SandStorm’ (4:36 in) and announced, while still hidden, “Ladies and Gentlecolts, (4:44 seconds in) introducing the a new addition to this DJ battle. A colt who is currently under a disguise and whose real name is ‘White Wind’,” I paused for affect (till 5:00), “R~~E~~~D CL~O~U~~~~~~~~D!!!!!!!” I dropped down from above every pony and into the middle of the dance floor, dancing. With that entrance, and the song reaching the pinnacle, all ponies there were stunned. As the song reached the switch point (6:25), I jumped and did a mid-air summersault, landing right behind my own DJ booth, as the competitors had brought their own, and stopped my music, initiating my battle mode. The other DJ ended up ganging on me for interrupting their own battle. I would like to say that I won, but I honestly didn’t, not by a longshot. I still had fun though.
When the battle was over, I waited about two hours, dancing with Rainbow, who had though that me interrupting them, was hilarious. After the second hour had passed, I had gone to my DJ booth, and announced, “Sorry guys and girls, I need to kick you all out now,” to which I had gotten many disapproving remarks about. When nopony moved I continued though, “You can stay if you want, but you would be helping to clean up everything, and re-setting the clouds, make sure everything is fixed, make sure that the floor is still safe for the Earth-Ponies, and the Unicorns to stand on, and re-compacting the floors, which is extremely difficult by the way, then be my guest, we just can’t continue until that is all set.” I got most of the ponies, who were mostly pegasi, to leave, with a few offers to help clean and do said tasks, and I accepted. I announced another piece of info just as they all started to leave though, “You are all welcome to come back when I throw my next party, which I will hold next year,” to which all the ponies cheered. I could have sworn that all of Cloudsdale and Ponyville was in my house.
Two days and several hundred bits found later, my house was re-built. I then started on the expansion of my place from a 50X50X50, to a 120X120X120. Multiple stories and large rooms, several bathrooms with at least a dozen toilets each, but I had left the original room alone, sort of a rest area for me and 50 guests maximum, if they wanted to get away from one of the seven parties that this place could hold when finished. But the current projections for the project would take slightly over a year and a half to finish, including time hanging out with friends. I might be able to get Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash to help out at parts.
All in all, I think that the party was a success, and that my friends accepted the apology. I decided to kick back, and wondered, ‘How the fuck am I going to get this die out, and get this sticker off.’ I decided to go to Rarity’s place, because she seemed to have the most sense when it came to stuff like this. Or so I gathered from the two times I have met her. I started to ask about Rarity’s place, and found out that she owns a boutique, and directions as well. Following the directions, which were very accurate, I arrived at Rarity’s in under ten minutes.
Walking in, I heard some fabric being moved and it reminded me of the fabric thing that I had seen in my memory. “Excuse me, is Rarity here?” I asked as a large sheet of purple fabric flew past me.
“I’m in the back, I’ll be with you in just a sec’.” Came the reply from the semi-familiar voice. I waited for just a few minutes before Rarity walked into the main room, where I had been looking at the fabrics with an eye and hoof for the correct material. “Hello dearie, sorry for the wait. What can I do you for?”
Turning around I said, “As cheap as possible,” I replied deadpan, before breaking composure, and falling to the ground, laughing, when I saw Rarity turn red. “I-I’m sorry…” I said between breaths, “I-I couldn’t… couldn’t help it… It was just… just the per-perfect opportunity.” I finished laughing and got up a moment later to see Rarity, red with anger, and I burst out laughing again.
“What would you like Mr. Red Cloud, or should I say Mr. White Wind?” Rarity said in a very annoyed tone.
I stopped laughing and regained my composure. “If you are going to call me Mr.,” I started, completely serious, “Then please use my middle name, ‘Bond’, otherwise, White Wind is fine.” I started to crack, but caught myself as I was done making jokes. “Anyways, I was originally here for a single reason, but that reason has become two now. One for advice, the other for a purchase of skill…”
I was interrupted by Rarity, who said in a very seductive tone, “Oh but Mr. Bond, I can assure you, I don’t come cheap.” This time it was my turn to turn red. Thank god for pink fur hiding the blush. Instead I just met her gaze deadpan. Rarity was taken aback by my serious expression, and faltered visibly, before I continued what I was saying.
“A purchase of skill, as I assume that you are able to make most anything with fabric. And no, I didn’t come here for sex Rarity, it takes a lot more than a seductive tone to get with this stallion. Also, I would quit that night job if I were you, and stick with your day job.” I shot the sex joke back into her court.
“I can assure you darling, I know how to seduce any stallion. But if you change your mind, my door is open at night.” She ignored the real reason I came here to respond to the joke, with another joke.
“Careful what you wish for Rarity, because you might just get it.” We stared at each other for a good minute before we both broke out laughing. “Back to the reason I came here, and the second reason I found, when I got here. I came here thinking you could help me find a solution to my fur problem, as I dyed it this color and don’t care to ruin it further, and the sticker super-glued to my rump.” I shook said piece of my body to express my point. “Second is that I would like you to make something with this fabric.” I walked over to the most tightly woven, light-weight material I had found. “I have a business idea but need this type of fabric and a lot of durable string in order to produce the item for my business.”
“Well White Wind, for the fur, the only thing you can do without bleaching it, is let it regrow. As for the sticker, you could go to the spa to get it removed. As for the fabric, draw me up what you need it put into, and I will see what I can do.” I thanked her and started drawing up the design for the Parachute. We talked awhile I drew up the design / blueprints for it. When I was finished with the drawing, I handed it to Rarity, who studied it, confused as to what it was.
“It’s a Parachute. It allows one or two at a time to sail through the air, where ever they want. Of course though, they need training on how to properly use it and not get hurt.”
“I think that is a lovely idea. But making something like this would take some time and cost around 200 bits, for me to make just one. How many where you hoping to get?” Rarity asked.
“I was hoping for at least six, up to twelve preferably. How quick would you be able to make one of them?”
“Making one would take me a few days, making six, will take about three weeks.”
“Start with three as I can pay for that, I will see how many ponies would be interested in this opportunity, and order some more depending on what is needed. How does that sound?”
“Lovely dear. I think you just found a business partner.”
I had entered Rarity’s Boutique, exchanged a few sex jokes, and ended up getting a business partner. And no, the business is not related to sex by the way, it was for paragliding. I gave her a diagram of how the parachute for paragliding is put together, I gave her money to make three of them, totaled around 632 bits by the way, and with any luck, I can get some earth ponies or unicorns, who want to feel control over flying and not be limited to where the wind takes you, like with a hot air balloon.
But before I advertised my new business, I had a spa to go to and try to get the sticker comfortably removed, without taking a ton of hair with it. As I entered, I saw Fluttershy sitting on the bench in the waiting room. “Good afternoon Fluttershy, how are you?”
“Oh, um, I’m fine. I’m sorry, but, do I know you?” she asked very quietly.
“Fluttershy, you don’t recognize me? But I held a party, and, and you visited me in the hospital, and told you stuff. Sure I had a different fur color of white, but, but…” I let my voice trail off…
“Oh my, Mr. White Wind. I’m sorry, how are you?”
I decided that I wouldn’t correct her on the name. “I am well, what brings you to the spa? You don’t seem like a pony who would go to a spa.”
“Oh, well, I meet with Rarity each week, and, um…” her voice trailed off.
“I was just talking with Rarity. I hope that I wasn’t delaying her from meeting with you.”
“I, um, I don’t mind, really.”
“Nonsense. I hate tying someone up and keeping them from pre-arranged appointments.”
“What are you doing here? That is, if you don’t mind me asking.”
“Of course I don’t. I’m here because Rarity told me that this place could help me get this sticker off relatively painlessly. I’m guessing that it would be somewhere along the lines of a sauna or something, that would help with that.” I walked up to the counter, and asked about it. “Excuse me, do you have a sauna here?” The clerk at the desk nodded. “Great, what are the longest time periods able to use one for, and how much does it cost?”
“Longest time you can rent one for is an hour, and it costs 30 bits.” The clerk responded.
I pondered a while and did some calculations. ‘I had about 800 bits start of today, about 582 were found during the cleaning of my house, and I had around 200-250 bits before the party. I just spent 632 on the parachutes, leaving me with somewhere around 170-200 bits. I need about 120 of those for the three week wait before the parachutes are done, and another 20 for advertising. Leaving me 30-60 bits. I could probably make it on 90 bits and use the other 30 to contribute with the sauna, allowing me to safely buy two hours of time, and possibly three. You know what, I’m going to do the three hours.’ “I think that I would like to get three, hour long, time slots, for use of the sauna. Is that all right?”
“I’m sorry sir, but it is against our policy to allow you to do that. We can only schedule you for once use per six hours, otherwise it could hurt you rather than help you relax.”
At that moment, Rarity came in, wearing her hat, and apologized to Fluttershy for being late. She then called to the clerk, the one I was about to make a reservation with the sauna, and said, “The usual.” The clerk smiled largely and ran off.
“Great, guess I will see if I can get a bathtub or my own sauna, to work in a cloud house.” I walked out, grumbling about the mechanics of getting it to work. I figured it out, sure, but building a 4 person sauna would cost me around 120 bits, excluding the materials to actually run it. I decided that the sticker wasn’t worth it, so I just let it be until it, and the rest of my fur, shed naturally. Or I could just shave it all. I decided to shave it, but after I got my house to a spot that I could still reach it.
I set out to advertise the classes and rentals of the Parachutes. Living in a city where the inhabitants were mostly earth ponies, I figured that getting some ponies to sign up, would be easy. After getting some paper, quills, and ink, I drew up some flyers, and started to post them around when Rainbow flew down.
“Hey, what are you doing?” she asked.
“Advertising a way for earth ponies and unicorns to fly. Also trying to figure out how I should go about shaving myself. So you know, the usual stuff.”
“What?”
“Hm?”
“You just said… You know what, never mind.”
“Want to help post flyers? I still have about half the town to cover.”
“Sure, I have nothing better to do.” I handed her half the stack and told her what half to cover. Rainbow read the poster aloud before moving. “‘Do you wish to fly without having to use wings? Do you wish to travel across great distances through the air? Learn how to do this, and be one of the few who can. Meet at the Ponyville’s Maple Park on Tuesday the 31st.’ The 31st? That’s 25 days from now.”
“I know. It gives me plenty of time to gather the necessary items, and the residents of Ponyville enough time to prepare for this event. Not only that, but I will have time to test out each item. Hell, who know, I might even fly to Canterlot on a test-fly, won’t that be a laugh and a half. Landing on top of the royal palace in a thing never seen before. The guards would freak! That would be a really fun thrill. Anyways, posters.” With that, we parted and finished posting the flyers, and met back up in the square.
“So, got anything planned for today?” Rainbow asked.
“No not really. Again I was thinking of shaving my body completely, but that will happen in a few days. Why? Have anything special planned?”
“No not really, I was going to practice a few stunts though. You know, it doesn’t reflect very well on me when I hire somepony, and they don’t appear for work for 23 days.”
“I’m taking it that I have been fired then?”
“No, you aren’t fired, just informing you that you still have a job and responsibilities.” Rainbow said.
“Good to know. So, I’m guessing that I will need to start fulfill these responsibilities, and as such, can’t shave and pluck out every feather I have?” I inquired.
“Dude, that sounds painful, but yah, kind of, unless you can figure out a way to help with the weather while being unable to fly in the air.”
“I think I can manage. After all, I have a cloud house I can take some cloud from, and the wind seems to like me enough to push me around to where I want to go. I should also ask Rarity to make me something that will hide my wings. Anyways, let’s see those new tricks you have been working on.”
I followed Rainbow to a park, where I watched some tricks she has been working on. That lasted until I started having headaches again. *‘I was bungee jumping, and for some reason, the girl that keeps coming up in my memories, had followed me. I felt annoyed that she was there because she kept remarking on how bungee jumping off a 65 story skyscraper was a bad idea. I turned to her and said, “Look lady, just because you’re the chief of police’s daughter, doesn’t mean I can’t, and won’t, put a restraining order on you.” She retorted, “And bungee jumping off a skyscraper is illegal.” “Only if you don’t have permission to do it” I shot back before going to the crane on top of the building, and moving the end out over the streets. “Fine, I guess that if you have permission, then I will join you.” “Now that would be illegal. See, I have permission to do this, you don’t. Now if you will excuse me, I have some stunts to do.” I walked to the end of the crane, tied the ends of my bungee to the crane and made sure it was secured, before jumping. I had the bungee measured out to that the slack would take at the 40th floor, and that it would bring me to the 10th floor as the furthest it could possibly reach. I reached the 15th floor before bouncing back up, and almost reaching the 60th floor, before falling back down. On my second time back up, I reached the 55th floor, before catching myself with the safety rope, and climbing back onto the crane. Looking over I saw the women still standing on the roof, arms crossed and a scowl on her face. I jumped again, this time, something bad happened. The crane I was jumping from, started to move back over the building! I caught the rope, stopping my downward fall, and barely had time to react before crashing into the side of the building, nearly breaking my legs as I swung into it. I climbed up the side of the building, painfully slowly. When I reached the top, the women was in the same place, same posture, but with a smirk on her face. “WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU WERE DOING!” I yelled. She just looked at me and said, “What?” all innocently like she had done nothing wrong. “WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN WHAT? YOU MOVED THE CRANE BACK OVER, CRASHING ME INTO THE BUILDING! I COULD HAVE BEEN KILLED!” Her smirk just grew, “But you weren’t, now were you?” I calmed down, knowing that she was antagonizing me. “That’s it, I’m not only going to get a restraining order put on you, calling the cops to get you arrested for attempted murder.”’*
‘Man I hate those headaches. And what the fuck was that memory about?’ Apparently, Rainbow had taken notice of the headache I was having, and came down to comfort me.
“Another memory surfacing?” she asked. I only nodded as she comforted me.
“Well, how about we go see what one of our friends are doing.”
“Sure, who should we see?”
“How about Rarity, I have something very simple I need her to make. I will also need to put another sticker on over this one later, I think that Twilight might have told the Princess about me and my changes. Just a hunch though.” We made our way over to Rarity’s. “Also don’t tell anyone about me going to mess with some royal guards” Upon arriving at Rarities, we found Twilight, Spike, Pinky Pie, Rarity, Fluttershy, and a trio of ponies, of whom, I don’t know. Rainbow and I walked in as the trio was walking out, and Rarity was doing some monolog about being a star.
“Hey ponies and dragon, what’s up? Hey Rarity. I have a request for you that will only take a few minutes at most to make.” I said walking in.
“What is it dear?” she asked
“Can you make me something that will cover my wings completely, look like it is part of me, and is easily removed? Something kind of like a vest, but doesn’t wrap around the legs.”
“What could you possibly need something like that for?” Twilight asked.
“Reasons upon reasons.” I said tactically avoiding the question.
“All righty dear. It shouldn’t take more than a couple of minutes to put that together. Go stand on that dais.” She indicated to the thing that Fluttershy was standing on.
I walked into Rarity’s Boutique with Rainbow Dash, as a trio was exiting. I heard a monolog from Rarity, but didn’t catch most of it, something about being a star. Anyways, I asked Rarity to make me a vest like garment that covered my wings, and was asked, in turn, to stand on the dais in the main room, where I noticed Fluttershy in an extravagant dress. “That is a lovely dress you have on Fluttershy.”
“Oh, um, thank you… Rarity made it for a photo shoot.” Came the shy response.
“Is that why that trio was here?”
“Oh yes. Rarity met Photo Finish, who complimented her hat, and Rarity asked me to model for her. I just couldn’t refuse.”
“So: Hat = Photo shoot… weird.”
“All right, this should only take a few minutes.” Rarity called, finally emerging with a pink fabric that matched my current fur color. She levitated the fabric over to me and wrapped a section around. Next she cut the fabric in the appropriate places and sewed them together. Lastly, she put buttons on the chest portion and we were done. “How is that White Wind, or should I say Red Cloud.”
I looked into a mirror that was floated over to me, and I expanded my wings, causing the buttons to come undone. “Perfect.” I said, “How much do I owe you?”
“Don’t worry about it. After all, we are business partners, even if we mess around sometimes.” She gave me a wink to let me know she was messing with everyone there, so I played along.
“Yah, you seem to be the only one that fits that set of my personality.” The other ponies looked at us with a look of disgust and Spike looked at me with a hint of hatred.
“Your right, I certainly know how to get you going.”
“Yah, and doing it while others are present, just makes the whole thing, how do I say this, exciting?” The looks we were getting from everyone there finally set me off laughing, which sent Rarity laughing as well. It was a while before I could speak through the laughter, “You… you should have… have seen you faces.” A new fit of laughter struck me as I remembered the faces they made.
“You thought that we… were talking about…” Rarity had taken over but was unable finish the sentence.
“Wait, you two were just making sex jokes?” Twilight asked?
I was able to regain my composure long enough to at least partially answer the question, “Well, putting sexual innuendos into speech, then playing off the others last innuendo is quite fun, exciting even.” I laughed again at the reference to what I had just said. “Have a good day everypony, and dragon. Rarity, please don’t forget about the items I purchased from you, I would like to test the first one when it is done. And please don’t tell anypony about it. Secrets and all, you know. Although it could be obvious on what it is, but still.”
“You can pick up the first one four days from now. And don’t forget to come to my fashion show tomorrow.”
“Oh, of course.” I left after confirming my appearance.
The following day, I met up with Rainbow and the rest of the weather patrol. My first day of the job and I meet a rather nice pony named Derpy. She was a bit of a klutz but overall, was a good pony. The weather patrol cleared the skies with good time, and I was able to make it to the fashion show, only to learn that Rarity was in fit over her not the one becoming a star. I watched the show and saw Fluttershy looking extremely uncomfortable in the spotlight. I decided that I had seen enough so I told Rarity my excuses and seemingly left. After the show, when Fluttershy was alone, I went down to her with an offer.
“Hey Fluttershy.”
“Oh hey White Wind, how are you?”
“I am well, listen, if the modeling becomes too much for you, and I can see that it kind of is, you have access to my house. For some reason, the wind likes to carry it away from people that I don’t want in there. Still don’t know why the wind likes me so much, but hey, that’s a magical world for you.”
“Oh well, thank you, but um, my little forest friends…”
“They can go in to, I assure you.” I interrupted her.
“Oh thank you.”
“Don’t worry about it.”
After our talk, I decided to disappear for three more days, except for when I did the weather patrol. Fluttershy had also come to use the house to hide on the third day of my hiding. We chatted a bit before I put a different sticker over the one currently on, and went to pick up my first parachute from Rarity.
“Hello Rarity, you done with the first item?” I asked wearing the ‘vest’ she made me.
“Hello Red Cloud. Yes, it is right here.” She indicated to a pack that hid the fabric.
“Perfect. Should we test it out?” I said, putting the pack on and strapping myself into it. We walked to the open space behind Rarities house. Deploying the parachute, I it a gallop to get it open. Stopping and looking behind me, I saw that it was open, and catching the wind very nicely. “This is very nice Rarity, nice and sturdy, and it’s catching the wind how it is supposed to. Wow!” I complimented and shouted as the parachute picked me up. “This is perfect! Thanks for the wonderful first parachute! I’m looking forward to the next two!” I shouted behind me as I flew off. My next destination, Canterlot Castle.
Sailing was fairly easy with the modified parachute. Worked almost like a one for a human would. I reached Canterlot Castle in a little over 2 and a half hours, and landed on top of the highest spire, where I had seen a large, white pony with a mane that flowed against the current wind. It also had a horn and wings. ‘Haven’t seen that before.’ I thought, just before landing. Just as I planned, two guards flew up to where I was.
“Halt, you are under arrest for suspected assault on the princess.”
“Wow, already? Okay. As an earth pony, I can’t really get away now can I?” I asked. “Just let me pack this up. It would be a shame for it to tear it.” The guards complied, thinking that I was complying, and believing that I was an earth pony, and noticing I had nowhere to go. I took off my pack, packed up the parachute, put the parachute back on, not strapping it in, and the guards started to close in. “Well my good ponies,” I started, standing up on my hind legs, “I believe that this has been a fun little experiment. Now if you excuse me, I have places to be.”
I did a backflip off of the spire, surprising the two guards and the princess as I dropped past. The princess caught the backpack in her magical grip and I was left looking at her in the eyes, or rather, eye. “Welp Miss Princess Lady, I see you have my bag. If you want, you are welcome to try and figure out how it works, but when you are done, if you would be kind enough to send it to Ponyville, to a miss Rarity, then it would be much obliged. As for me, I will be taking my leave now.” With that, I slipped out of the pack, and dove, opening my hidden wings, and gripping the ‘vest’ in my mouth.
As you might be able to guess, I was caught in a magical grip. This time it wasn’t just an article I was wearing, but my actual body. I was floated back up to the Miss Princess Lady. I know, redundant. But you know, redundancy is redundant, making it an infinite loop of redundancy.
“Well then Mr.” her voice trailed off, “I’m sorry, I don’t know your name. And speaking of names, you will address me as either Princess Celestia, or Celestia.”
“Okay Miss Princess Lady.” I said showing her I understood, but wouldn’t change how I addressed her. I just got a very stern glare as I continued. “My name is Pink Bubbles. My family names their children based on their coat color, and last name comes when we get our cutie mark.”
“Well Mr. Pink Bubbles, but I do believe that that ‘cutie mark’ is a sticker,” she said as she took it off.
“Fine Miss Princess Lady, my name is Red Cloud” I admitted.
“Well Mr. Red Cloud, I still think that your ‘cutie mark’ is still a sticker” This time she ripped the sticker that was superglued to my rump off, causing me to yell.
“OW~!!! That one was superglued to me. Dang that hurt.” I looked back at my rump to see my original cutie mark. “Heh, that is weird, the cutie mark not only appears on the fur, but on the skin.”
“Now then, what is your real name?”
“My real name huh? I can’t quite remember my real name. Although I do go by White Wind.”
A memory swept over me, causing my head to pound. *‘I drifted into a palace square, revved my engine a couple of times, causing the guards to rush to my in attempt to stop me. I drifted in a circle as the guards got close, and the guards jumped back. I laughed as I attempted to drive back out of the palace square, but was blocked by police cars. I rushed them, ramming into the two cars in an attempt to escape. It worked to the extent that it allowed my car to get through, but failed by not actually letting my car get through. The door opened, and I was dragged out of the car by the police.’*
“You know, this reminded me of another time I was arrested by royalty.” I said a few seconds after I introduced my original alias.
“What are you talking about?” Celestia asked.
“Well Miss Princess Lady,” I was interrupted.
“I told you to call me Princess Celestia.”
“Okay. Like I was saying Miss Princess Lady, you might remember how I said I didn’t remember my name? Yah, that goes with the rest of my past. So if Miss Princess Lady will let me go, as I have done nothing but test after, and a good joke.” I swear that Celestia had been smiling the entire time, but that last time I said ‘Miss Princess Lady’ her smile faltered for a few seconds. It was kind of scary, but also funny that I was able to get her to crack, and I snickered a bit.
“You might not have been doing anything harmful, but I can still lock you up, you know, being Miss Princess Lady and all, I can do that kind of thing.”
“And I’m sure you are also capable of doing a lot of other things, Your Royal Miss Princess Lady Mare Pony.” Like I said redundancy is redundant, but hey, it is funny as hell. And adding to the name, got her eye twitching.
“Are you suggesting sex Mr. White Wind?” Celestia asked threateningly.
“One: if you are going to call me Mr., then please use my middle name Bond. Or if you are so inclined, you can call me Mister Commoner Man, or Lowly Mister Commoner Man Stallion Pony. Take your pick. And two: no, I was not suggesting sex what-so-ever, I was merely pointing out that you are able to do more than unlawful imprisonment. But if you are thinking about sex, then maybe I can help fulfill those thoughts, Your Royal Miss Princess Lady Mare Pony.” Oh how I love messing with ponies. So much fun. And oh, the poor little guards, and their uncomfortableness of this situation.
“Mr. White Wind, I assure you that your assumptions are incorrect.”
“Hey, I do believe that it was Your Royal Miss Princess Lady Mare Pony that was assuming things. I don’t like to assume things, because assuming makes an ass out of you and me. I don’t know about you, but I personally like being a pegasus, no offence to any donkey out there.”
“That’s it,” I think I finally got her to snap because her voice suddenly changed from gentle to a harsh, scary, loud one, “Take him to the prison.”
09 Memory's Mind Fucking (no better way to describe this)
So I went to the royal palace using a parachute, and decided to mess with the first ponies I met. Turns out, the pony I met was Princess Celestia, of whom I constantly referred to as ‘Miss Princess Lady’ and a bit later as ‘Your Royal Miss Princess Lady Mare Pony’. I think I struck a sour cord with her when I made a sex joke, then insisted that it wasn’t.
“Mr. White Wind, I assure you that your assumptions are incorrect.” Celestia had said
“Hey, I do believe that it was Your Royal Miss Princess Lady Mare Pony that was assuming things. I don’t like to assume things, because assuming makes an ass out of you and me. I don’t know about you, but I personally like being a pegasus, no offence to any donkey out there.”
“That’s it,” I think I finally got her to snap because her voice suddenly changed from gentle to a harsh, scary, loud one, “Take him to the prison.”
“NO, NOT PRISON YOUR ROYAL MISS PRINCESS LADY MARE PONY!!!” I said in a very sarcastic and loud voice, before reverting back to normal, “I demand to see my lawyer! Your Royal Miss Princess Lady Mare Pony, message Twilight Sparkle! I know you can contact her! My informants told me thus!!!” To this, she had no comment, and I was put into prison.
I was later, roughly pulled out of the cell, blindfolded, and brought literally 10 steps to the right of my prison cell, before having my blindfold taken off, and shoved into another room. I could see the cell I had just come from, as I was being shoved into the other room. I found a table and a few chairs in the center of the room, and decided to enact some silly insanity on all the ponies watching me from behind a mirror. Yes, it was an interrogation room. Anyways, I went to the table, found three chairs, proceeded to stack them on top of the table, creating a pyramid out of the four pieces of furnisher, and sat, on air, at one of the ends that the chairs were not at. And just for some extra shits and giggles, I started having a completely normal talk with the chairs I just stacked.
Ponies are very worrisome creatures. How do I know this you might ask? Simple, two of the unknown number of ponies behind the glass, primarily Princess Celestia, and another pony like her, except for mostly all black, walked in from behind me with a worried expression, to which I used to my advantage.
“Hello Celestia, or should I say Your Royal Miss Princess Lady Mare Pony for short? I don’t think that I have met your sister yet, Y.R.M.P.L.M.P. or You’replump. And before, you say anything, I can assure you, that I am perfectly sane, it is everypony else that is insane. And before you ask how I knew what you were going say, I will tell you that I read it on your face. And before you ask how I knew it was you, and your sister, or how I was able to read your faces, since I have my backs to you, I will ask you this, look in front of me, what do you see? And as to the sister thing, she snickered when I called you that ridiculously long name, which I won’t stop using by the way, and again when I called you You’replump. This indicates a sisterly relationship.”
I watched as their faces changed from worry, to confusion, to awe, to oh-duh, and back to awe. However, I did get another snicker from the dark one when I once again called Celestia plump.
“Stuff like her and I being sisters is common knowledge, preschoolers know that. You know why you are here though, right?” Celestia asked.
“I thought that the point of an interrogation was to get meaningful answers from the suspect. And if you had contacted Twilight like I told you to, we all wouldn’t be here, and I wouldn’t be messing with your minds by talking to chairs that I stacked on a table for no reason, while sitting, and quite comfortably I might add, on intangible air, while not using magic or my wings. Or if it is just your petty anger, which got to show itself quite fiercely and was scary, yet hilarious, then what is stopping you from throwing me in jail for life? Oh wait, I know, it’s the fact that I have alibis that know where I am, and start to wonder why I haven’t appeared in who knows how long. Then questions will be raised, and it will come out that Princess Celestia has imprisoned a pony for no more than name calling, and you would have to step down as ponies start to question your ability to lead. I may act like it, but I am truly not insane. And no, I’m not threatening, I’m just coming to the logical conclusion that I believe even you have come to. Why else try to interrogate me, other than to try and find something that you truly can lock me up for. Damn how I hate talking, I’m going to shut up now.” With what I had to say put out there, I shut up.
“How the buck did you…” Celestia said
‘Very un-lady like to swear, especially for a princess’ I thought, staying silent
“All right, how did you know that?” She continued. Stayed silent. “Tell us or we will put you in prison for withholding information.” As she continued, I continued. “Fine, why were you on my roof?” I don’t think this needs further explaining, or examples, as this continued for quite some time. And Celestia’s voice was getting tired, and she was more than slightly ticked.
Finally the dark furred princess spoke, “Celestia, let me try to get him to talk.” She turned to me and asked in the same voice that Celestia had used earlier, “How are you White Wind?”
“I’m fine, although I would appreciate it if you didn’t yell, it hurt’s my ears. Also, I don’t think I caught your name.” I responded, causing Celestia to attempt again, this time in her own weird, loud voice.
“Why did you come here?”
I ignored her and was still looking at the dark pony and waiting for an answer. And I got one, “Our name is Princess Luna! It is nice to meet you!” she once again yelled with the same tone.
“Likewise, now if you would please get Crazily Enchanted Lunatic Egotist Your Royal Miss Princess Lady Mare Pony, or CeleYou’rePlump, to see reason, I will be on my way, with my things. Or if she wants to keep the item, then she can pay 450 bits for it, and be able to attend the lessons I will hold the 31st, then be my guest, I might even lower the price to 300 bits if you sign up for it now, and cut my losses.” I replied.
I think Luna wanted to mess with her sister even more by making her go to the class, as she yelled, “She will be there!” Luna then gave me a sack of 300 bits, and I was on my way, 90 bits richer.
“Oh, by the way, before I go, and this is important. I’m not joking around here. Seriously, I’m not joking around. The class starts at 11:00 am. Don’t miss it.” I then pulled Luna over for a quick favor, “Can you make sure not to let Celestia send anything to Twilight about her coming? I want to mess with the ponies of Ponyville a bit.” Luna nodded, and we parted.
I flew back to Ponyville and was immediately confronted by a Twilight Sparkle. “You called the Princess fat!?!” her opening line was.
“No I didn’t. At least, not directly. Now if you will excuse me, I have a pony that I need to shave, then pluck every feather off its body.” I flew off, leaving Twilight shocked and scared.
I did just as I said I would, and shaved, and de-feathered a pony. Me to be exact. I went about my daily routines, and even picked up the other two parachutes. I thought about buying another one with the money I got from the princesses before realizing something that made me stop. I could have been set up with that money, so I decided to hold onto it.
Finally the fated day arrived. I was at Maple Park, the two remaining parachutes, one strapped to a doll that Rarity was so kind to let me borrow, the other on the ground besides me, the time was currently 10:50:37.934 Am, and already most of the town was gathered to find out what it was that the flyers were talking about. At exactly 11:00:00.000 Am, Celestia arrived. “Ah~ the guest of honor has arrived, and exactly on time as well. Residents of Ponyville, I present you with one who will be taking my classes in this wonder, Princess Celestia!” All the ponies bowed.
Twilight was the first to speak up. “Princess Celestia, I had no idea that you were coming today. If I had known, we would,”
I interrupted her, “You would have prepared the town for her arrival rather than come to learn what I have to offer.”
“Actually Mr. White Wind, I have come to arrest you for stealing from the national treasury.”
“I knew it,” I murmured under my breath. “Is Your Royal Miss Princess Lady Mare Pony, still upset from the nick name I gave her?” I asked out loud. “Because I could have sworn you bought a parachute, and full lessons on how to use it, AND instructor guidance on how to do tricks, when you were interrogating me for something other than name calling, to use to arrest me. The Parachute, normally, I would sell for 250 bits, but gave it to you for 200. The full-intensive, 15 week tutoring on how to use it would cost 100 bits, sold for 50, the same price as the regular 9 week course. And then the trick training, a 100 bit value, complete with safety precautions, high level, one-on-on how to, I gave to you for 50 bits. I can give you a full refund, but I will need the parachute in an unharmed state. I’ve told you two things before and I will say them again, first, you have no actual charge against me, and second, I might act insane, but I’m really not. Now, if you will please sit down, with the other ponies, Celestia, we are about to begin.”
I was at Maple Park, and the time was currently 10:50 Am. Most of the town was gathered to learn what the flyers were about. At exactly 11:00 Am, Celestia arrived. “The guest of honor has arrived everypony. Residents of Ponyville, I present you with a pony who will be taking my classes Princess Celestia!” All the ponies bowed.
Twilight spoke up. “Princess Celestia, I had no idea that you were coming today. If I had known,”
I interrupted her, “You would have prepared the town instead of coming to learn what I have to offer.”
“Actually Mr. White Wind, I have come to arrest you for stealing from the national treasury.”
“I knew it,” I murmured under my breath. “Is Your Royal Miss Princess Lady Mare Pony, still upset from the nick name I gave her? Because I could have sworn you bought a parachute, and full lessons on how to use it, AND instructor guidance on how to do tricks, when you were trying to interrogating me for name calling. The Parachute, you bought for 200 bits. The full-intensive, 15 week tutoring on how to use the parachute, sold for 50 bits. And then the trick training, I gave to you for 50 bits. That set I could have sold for 450 bits, but sold to you for 300 bits. I can give you a full refund, but I will need the parachute in an unharmed state. If it isn’t I will have to charge you repair costs, or replacement costs. Now, if you will please sit down Celestia, we are about to begin.”
To my surprise, and everypony else’s, she sat down, slightly defeated by the sudden rejection to follow orders and backlash of exposing the plot. “Alright then,” I started the lesson, “First thing, we will go over, the theory, and the basics of how this works. The theory is, if you are able to catch enough wind over a large surface area, the tension and force that it causes, can lift a pony off the ground. Now the only trick to this, is how to control that surface area, tension, and force created…” I continued to lecture the ponies there and let a few of them try it out for themselves, making sure they stayed on the ground of course. “Celestia, you have your pack with you?” She nodded. “Pass it here.” I received the pack and opened it, finding it all tangled and crumpled.
“Now you see Ladies and Gentlecolts, this is what happens when the packs are not treated correctly after use. They need to be packed correctly, otherwise the string throughout the parachute gets tangled, making it useless or very dangerous to fly with.” I tossed the pack down, “Now you lucky few who got to test lift off, you felt the parachute want to lift you off the ground right?” They nodded and I continued. “Now I couldn’t technically let you take off, as none of you are currently enrolled within my class, but I can have Princess Celestia please come up,” she obliged willingly, and almost seamed excited. “Mind if I tie your wings for the sake of proper flight?” I asked, and she took the cloth and tied her wings herself using magic. “Thank you, now will you put on this pack?” I took off the pack with the doll and gave it to Celestia. “I would like to thank you all for coming to this presentation, which unfortunately is over. I have prepared a set of sheets with proper sign-up labels for if you wish to partake in the wonders of Paragliding. The sign-up sheet is for making an appointment with me to discuss potential classes. Don’t worry too much about remembering the dates for the appointment, as I will send you notices when it is coming up. You are all welcome to stay and watch Celestia’s lesson if you want.”
I turned to the ever so patient Celestia, who had been waiting somewhere halfway through my speech. “I still hate talking, but necessity, is necessary.” Celesta rolled her eyes, or eye. “So, let’s try deploying from a run.” I put on the pack that was already deployed. “Although we have to run into the wind, otherwise we won’t get the lift that we want. One more thing before we start this method. The pack is designed for little control when running, otherwise the chute wouldn’t work properly. Now when adjusted properly, the chute dismisses manual control and gets set into lock. But to set that, we have to lift the forelegs to the chest. And to regain control, we do the same thing. Currently, the parachute should be in manual control, so you will need to switch it into lock.” She did so. “Next we face into the wind. When we start the run, when the controls are locked, they are also set to deploy the chute by four, rapid steps. From there, keep running, the chute will catch wind, and when your forelegs are lifted from the ground, redeploy controls, and we should have lift off.”
“Are you sure you hate talking?” Celestia asked doubtfully.
“Absolutely Your Royal Miss Princess Lady Mare Pony,” came the cheery response. “Now if you will, I believe we have some flying to get to.”
I started my own run and took off almost right away. From above, I was able to see Celestia take off successfully, but almost immediately, the chute collapsed. I flew down to a Celestia, who was picking herself off the ground. “Almost got it, remember from the talk, you can’t go collapsing the thing when you take off. Let’s try again, now follow me as I pack the chute.” I started packing the parachute and Celestia followed what I did, packing it correctly. “Now try again and I will run besides you, and guide you through on how to do it.”
“And why didn’t you do that the first time?” she asked.
“Part of the learning. It’s helpful for the student to try once without instruction, as so they see that they can’t do everything. At least that is what I feel on the mater. Let’s try again”
We went through two hours before it was time to end the lesson. “Very good. You were able to take off a total of ten times, six of those, you collapsed the chute right away, three of them, you almost turned yourself into the ground, and the last one you were able to get off the ground successfully, and got the timing for collapse correct, albeit with instruction, congratulations. Now, unfortunately, our time together today has come to an end.” I said while walking to the table where I had everything else set up. Rummaging through the mess that was the signup sheets, I grabbed the folder that had Celestia’s schedule. Giving them to her, I told her, “Now here is the schedule for your lessons. Knowing the weather is very useful for planning like this.” I handed her a paper in exchange for the pack she was using. “Now untangling your chute will most likely take the rest of the day, so you can pick it up tomorrow. For the next week, I want you to practice this take off method, and figure out how to land. And please don’t do that alone, I have the correct distance written with that, so I want the person you are having supervise, watch you, and tell you when to collapse, and hopefully, you will get to the point, if you practice enough, to not need that. I also won’t charge you for untangling the chute this time, but I might need to if it happens again. Also, if I find any major tears, you might need to buy a new one. When practicing, make sure you do it in an open soft space so that you don’t tear the chute, or hurt yourself”
After that, we went our separate ways, me with three parachutes, and Celestia back to Canterlot. I decided to stop by Rarity’s first to buy another Parachute before heading to my house to drop the chutes off, bring my house down move everything into it, and return the items that I had borrowed. Upon arriving at Rarity’s, however, I was confronted by six ponies, each with different expressions. Twilight looked pissed, Pinkie Pie looked excited, Rainbow looked in awe, Fluttershy looked, well, shy, Applejack looked slightly confused, and Rarity looked pleased.
The first to speak was Twilight, “Now could you call the Princess names!”
“Easy, she and I have come to an understanding on that.”
“And what kind of understanding is that?”
“Hold on there, little pony, one question per pony. Who’s next?”
Applejack took up the next one, “Ok, but how did y’all get Celestia to just give up like that? I mean I ain’t never seen somepony give up like that.”
“We~ll,” I started hesitantly, “I decided to screw with her mind a tad bit, and I think, I might have broken it a bit.”
“BROKEN IT!!! WHAT THE HEY DO YOU MEAN BY THAT!?!” Twilight was in a frenzy over this.
“Twilight, Twilight. I do believe I said one question per pony.”
“He did! He did! He did say that. OO, OO let me ask next. Can you teach me how to fly one of those parachute thingies!!!!” like I said, Pinkie Pie was excited.
“Of course Pinkie Pie. Did you write your name down on this appointment sheet?” I asked getting a vigorous nod. “Good, I will see you at the appropriate time then. I look forward to our meeting.”
“Hey that’s not fair, you have asked more than one question!” Twilight pointed out.
“Shut up Twilight. Life isn’t fair.”
“Hey, y’all don’t be telling my friend here to ‘shut up’, yah hear?”
“More than one question Applejack; therefore, your previous sentence is invalid. Next ‘Valid’ question please.”
“That was so cool how you got Celestia to sit like that! You have got to teach me how to do that!” Rainbow demanded.
“I’m sorry, but I don’t think that she would appreciate it if I did that. And also, it is fun to be the only one to have leverage over a princess, like that. Anymore?”
“Um, I would just like to say, thank you for letting me use your house.” Fluttershy said very softly.
“No problem, I like helping friends. Rarity, I can kind of sense that you don’t have anything to ask me, and that you are just proud to have something you made used by a princess. So I will just get to the point of me being here. Seeing as I only have two parachutes currently, I would like you to make another one for me. I will also be needing some more later on, but will have to get to that when I have collected money from lessons.” I left 204 bits with Rarity and left after saying one last thing. “Oh, and I will be getting that doll back to you after I have gathered everything back up. Currently, it is almost all back at the park and will be going back there almost immediately. And thanks again for the thing we had between us.” I finished
“Don’t mention it dear, I love secrets anyways.” She replied, telling only the truth, being only a secret between us. And the others should have known that we were just messing with them, as we have already told them this. But instead, they almost all turned red, except for Twilight really, who was already red.
And I was off once more to do the things that I had set out to do that day, and I completed them all. I even was able to preview who I was to visit the next day.
All things were fine and dandy. I had my own house, which was expanding every day; I had a steady job with the Weather Patrol; I have wings to do amazing stunts with; I had my own business started; I taught my first lesson of paragliding to the town, then went into the personal lesson with Celestia; I even have gone through a month of getting people into classes, teaching many, and I even have 20 parachutes, minus the ones I have already sold. I could defiantly say that all was going extremely well. Keyword, Could. You see, after a month had gone by I realized a few different things. Those things, changed the path that I was taking into Equestria, and brought me to a crossroads. ___ ___ ___
Two Weeks After Lessons Started: 7 Days Till Events: Rainbow Dash flew down beside me, as I left a house, full speed, and landed the same way I have when going extremely fast. Too be honest, she had gotten the hang of my spinning landing very quickly. Within the two weeks, we have hung out almost 24/7, except for when I went into the meeting for ponies who want to paraglide. Other than that though, we were together most of the day. It even got to the point where I call her Dashy.
“Sup Dashy?” I asked.
“Nothing really, what did you think of my landing?” she counter-asked.
“I think that you are now better at it than I am,” I said honestly.
“Dude, you’re joking right?! You are so better than me,” she tried to defend me, didn’t know why at the time though.
“Are you kidding me? I, who have only done it all of four times, compared to you, who has been practicing it non-stop, for probably as long as the first time I arrived here.”
“Really? Thanks! Anyways, lets head over to Rarity’s, she has the dresses for The Grand Galloping Gala ready to show us.”
“Oh yah, that is in what, seven days? I guess my parachute orders have been holding her back a bit from making the dresses. Let’s go.”
Rainbow and I walked to Rarity’s. Why we didn’t fly, you may ask. Well, it’s because walking takes longer. Upon arriving, we found the other five already in the shop, waiting for us. We were led to Rarity’s inspiration room, where there were six outfits: five dresses, and one suit. I think that I was the only one to realize that there were only five dresses, and that Rarity’s dress wasn’t there.
“Is there something wrong?” Rarity asked the ponies before her, who each found something that they didn’t like.
I for one, finally inspected my own outfit. It was a white jacket, with a light red trim, bright, sparkling, white shoes, a dark red, ruffled dress shirt with a complementary bowtie, and a white fedora, also with red trim. The whole thing was more than I could accurately describe in full detail. I finally realized that the six other ponies were looking at me, as I was the only one who didn’t say something.
“I think it’s near perfect. The only thing I could possibly change, are the shoes. Keep the sparkle, but have the bottoms red, fade into white at the top, but in a flame like pattern. That is the only thing that I would change from this outfit. But I have a single question for you Rarity, if the Gala is in seven days, and I also realize that it is my fault for the lack of time, but if you have to remake the dresses, when can you make yours?” I asked, but I wasn’t quite expecting that everyone except Rarity to disappear in the time it took to ask the question.
“Don’t worry about it dear, I said that I would make everyone’s outfit, and so I will.”
“I just hope you have enough time to make your own dress. And if that means not remaking my shoes, then skip them and work on your own dress. Well, I will see you later Rarity.” I left before she could respond, as to keep her from arguing back. ___
Day of events: 19 Hours till events: Twilight had created a carriage out of apple, and some horses out of mice, who ran away after a cat frightened them. Each pony was in there original dress, and Rarity had made the shoe change, which she, as well, thought complemented the suit.
“Great, now what will we have pull the carriage?” Twilight asked.
“I could pull it, after all, as long as we fly, I can pull it.” I offered.
“How are you going to get it to fly?” She asked back.
“Simple, I use my super-condensed clouds.”
“That won’t be necessary,” Rarity interrupted, being followed by a few colts.
“Fine, I guess that I will just meet you girls there.”
“How are you going to get there?” Rainbow asked.
“Simple Dashy, in extreme style.” I left them behind and they all went into the carriage, while I went to my house. Within the house, I picked up a white pack, went to the roof, and ran off of it, going for a dive. I deployed the white parachute, and was lifted into an updraft. I grew level with the castle, and started my traverse to the capital. I arrived earlier than everypony else, and had found another updraft that brought me to near the altitude of 13 kilometers.
I stayed up there before the others came. At that point, I started my decent, and flew into the building, just behind the rest of my group. There were a lot of gasp as they saw me fly in. I gained a bit of altitude as the parachute was lifted slightly, and was able to get 4 feet above Celestia, and to the right of her. I clipped out of the chute, flared my longer-than-normal wings, and fell into a human-like kneel, head down, when I hit the ground, facing the princess. “Your white knight is here, as per your request. What are your orders?” I announced, head still down.
I swear I heard her chuckle ever so gently, and the room was silent, waiting to hear what would happen. “Rise my ‘White Knight’,” she said, enjoying the bit of mayhem that I had introduced, “Your only orders are to enjoy yourself while you are here.”
I looked up, mischief in my eyes, but the rest of my face strait, “Are you sure my Princess? All due respect, you know what my way having fun is.” I asked.
“Yes, Mr. Wild Whirlwind,” I grinned a very broad grin at the ‘code name’ she gave me, “I am sure that you will be the life of the party.” My grin grew even wider, if that is even possible.
“Yes Milady.” I stood up, and walked to the parachute that had collapsed over somepony, who surprisingly didn’t struggle due to shock of my entrance. Without speaking, I picked the chute off the pony, packed it up, and left all the staring ponies and giggling princess, and was off to raise some mayhem.
The first place I when to, was the courtyard, where I saw a unicorn with a rose in his mouth, and had a very stuck up aurora about him. I decided to play a prank on him to start my mischief. I decided to introduce myself to him.
“Excuse me, I couldn’t help notice but, are you just wearing a suit’s folds and a bowtie? I have got to say, it seems very unbecoming of a pony such as yourself to dress like a common pony.”
“A common pony! How dare you! I will have you know that I am Prince Blueblood! I would never dress like a commoner!”
“Then why dress so little? If you really were a prince, then why dress like every pony else? Why not dress in something more elegant?”
“How dare you speak to me that way!” he yelled, “I am royalty!”
“Yah, yah,” I said dismissively, “and so is Celestia and Luna, but all I said is how you dress is a common appearance. It certainly wouldn’t have been too much for someone like you to go all out, now would it? I mean even I am dressed more like royalty than you.”
“Guards!” Blueblood called. Two guards, the same two who met me when I landed on the roof, and when Celestia tried to arrest me three weeks ago, showed up. “Guards! Arrest this man!”
“For what charged, giving you fashion tips?” I said to him, then continued with a whisper, “At least when Celestia tried, I was at least being slightly negative.”
“Sir, I’m afraid that we will have to ask you to come with us. You are under arrest.” One of the guards said, slightly fearful of me.
“But Celestia told me to have fun… She knew what I was going to do, and so I’m doing it. I’m just following what a Princess told me to do.”
“Oh, okay then, we are sorry sir,” the two guards backed away, fearing that I would do something to them.
I turned to Blueblood, who was flabbergasted at the guard’s refusal to arrest me. “Well Mr. Stuck Up Bitch, I think that if I see you again, I will call you Sub. I would say that it was nice talking to you, but it kind of wasn’t.” And I left the courtyard, just as Rarity entered, apparently she had just recovered from the shock of my entrance.
My next destination was a spot where I had met Applejack. “Hey Applejack, how are you?” I asked.
“So far so good. Ah already made my first sale, within the first minute!”
“That’s great! Mind if I buy a few things?”
“Not at all!” Came the cheerful response. “I have caramel apples, apple pies, apple fritter, apple fries.”
“I think I will take a caramel apple and three apple fritters.” I said, paying 20 bits.
“Um, it’s not 20 bits total you know.”
“I know, but if any of our friends come by, tell them it’s on me.”
“Sure! Thanks!”
I began on the caramel apple first, and started walking to look for the guards who I drove away. I found them not to far away from the courtyard that I first began in. Walking up to them, I offered them both an apple fritter. “Here, sorry if I scared you two, I could see it in your faces. Anyways, this is my apology.” The two guards reluctantly took the fritters, before saying their thanks. I just smiled warmly and walked back into the main hall where Celestia was. Proceeding to said Princess, I offered her the remaining fritter, and she accepted. I then told her, “Well, I’m off to the VIP section to cause some ruckus there.” And then walked up the steps, opposite the direction of the VIP area. Twilight pointed this out.
“You know that you are going the wrong direction, right?” she called out.
“Yah, I know, I’m just preparing for my entrance.” I called back. “Oh and Celestia, if you would inform just the guards of my arrival, it would be much appreciated.”
Celestia got the hint of what I was going to do, and giggled. “Of course Mr. Wild Whirlwind.” The response sounded. Twilight looked a little confused, missing the fact that I had on a parachute.
I reached the top of the stairs, and walked a bit down the hallway, bumping into Luna as I was deploying the chute.
“Now what might we be doing here?” Luna asked when she saw me, using what I know as the Royal Canterlot Voice.
“Nothing much, flying in on parachutes, confusing the nobles, infuriating some royalty, causing some mischief, the usual. Except the only difference is that this time, your sister asked me to do it.”
“No way! Tia asked you to cause mischief!” Luna still used the RCV.
“Yep, now if you excuse me, I will be flying in on the VIP section.” I turned back towards the stairs, now having another name to call Celestia, ran, and jumped from the stairs. “See you later Tia!!!” I shouted as I flew by. I flew out, into the open air, and decided to stay out for a bit.
When I finally went into I found Rarity, Applejack, Rainbow, and Pinkie Pie were already there, I may have also helped Rarity, who yelled at Blueblood, making him fall over, nock over a large statue. That may or may not have also ruined and overshadowed my entrance. I started packing up my parachute, when Celestia came in, then Fluttershy with a lot of animals. Chaos ensued, and I helped it along by tripping ponies left and right as they ran past me. Of course my parachute was packed up when I did this though.
Celestia then walked over to me and said, “Come my little Whirlwind, we have ponies to meet.”
“Me? A little Whirlwind? Did you not see that giant tempest I created, that surrounded that eight kilometer tall mountain about two months ago?”
“That was you!” came the shocked reply.
“Yes that was me. Now I believe that you said something about meeting up with the others.” ___
Time Till Events: 20 minutes: Celestia and I walked into a doughnut shop to find the other six looking glum on how the evening turned out. They seemed to cheer up when they realized that they were together, though, and would still have fun.
“You know,” I started, “This could have been avoided.”
“Oh and how is that?” Twilight asked.
“By not being so damn selfish, and stayed together. It would have been better for you all, had you made the event into your own, with your friends. Hell, I was so board that I hung out in the sky for most of the party. I can tell why Tia hates it so much”
“I told you guys” Spike said, but was barely audible due to Twilight.
“Don’t act so familiar with the Princess!”
“You know what, Question time. Unlimited questions for the next 15 minutes, first pony to ask a question, gets the answer from me to the best of my ability.” I said.
Celestia was just staying silent due to enjoying out conversation. Twilight on the other hand, had plenty of questions, “Why don’t you address the Princess normally?”
“Simple, we have come to an understanding that I will not stop, and that she can’t prosecute me for just calling her names.” I replied.
“Then how did you get her to obey you?” Twilight continued.
“I was surprised myself actually, I guess that it was because of me messing with her mind, or because she feared the repercussions.” Me.
“How did you mess with her mind?” Twilight.
“By doing what I do. I have done it a few times with you girls, but bouncing off of Rarity, instead of going solo.” Me.
Ten minutes left, yah, the questions weren’t coming that fast.
“Was that another sex joke?” Applejack this time.
“No, but the fact that it did, was just a bonus.” Me.
“Why would she fear the repercussions of arresting you?” Rainbow.
“Simple cause and effect scenarios, which all led to a single point.” Me.
“And that would be?” Twilight.
“Secrets my dear Twilight, Secrets.” I decided to avoid that one, releasing tension that had apparently been building in Celestia, who let out a sigh.
Long silence, went to about 3 minutes before I closed the questions.
“What are you?” Rainbow. I had forgotten that she had seen my original form
“Currently: Pony. Previously: Human.” Me.
“A what?” Everyone, even Celestia.
“A Human, this thing.” I drew a picture on the table with a bit of sugar. “They are extremely clever, manipulative, omnivorous, thinking creatures. Almost like you ponies, but a bit more evil.” 1 minute left.
“Are they capable of love?” Rainbow. Time Till Events: 30 seconds.
“Yes they are” Me.
“Do you have somepony that you love?” Rainbow.
Time Till Events: 0 Seconds: I was about to say no when I realized that I did. And that pony was Rainbow Dash. This was the first event. The second one, was a lot more painful.
A small light appeared in front of me, and it started to grow. As it grew, it began to shoot off a beam with a pulse, slowly at first, but gaining speed. Finally, the light consumed my vision, and I collapse in pain, not aware of my surroundings. *‘I was being picked up by my father, who was wearing protective clothing with a lot of labels on them (age 4)… My father brought me to an empty race track, and let me sit in his lap as we drove around (age 6)… Mother died ironically in a car crash (age 7)… Secretly started driving (age 8)… Finished middle school, not many friends, and many tried to take advantage of me being the son of a racer (age 14)… Entered my first professional underground race, and won (age 14)… Father died during a race, his company took me in (age 15)… Continued underground races and quickly rose in ranks (age 17)… Found out that Father’s company took me in to claim his life insurance ‘for’ me, sued (age 17)… First met woman, Elis, that I fell in love with (age 20)… Married Elis (age 22)… Won lawsuit (age 25)… Picked up other hobbies other than racing (age 25)… Had a son (age 26)… Wife died (age 28)… Son’s fifth Birthday (age 31)… Came to this land (age 31)’*
I awoke in a bed surrounded by eight ponies, with two things in my head, one of which I said. “Dashy, I love you.” I passed out, but the second thing in my head was, ‘I know how to return home’. ___ ___ ___
I had two choices I could make, both with their own consequences. I could stay in Equestria, and live with Rainbow Dash for the rest of my life, unable to go back to Earth if I stay, and leaving five year old son with no one. Or I could return to Earth, live with my son, but turn my back on the person/pony that I love, never being able to return to Equestria. I had a choice to make, and had six weeks to make it, before the time expired, and I couldn’t go back even if I wanted to.
Two options, six weeks. Go home and live with my five year old son, who has no one else, and be empty inside from losing two loves of my life, or stay in Equestria, live happily with my love, Rainbow Dash, but leave son to fend for himself at the age of five. ___ ___ ___
Memories returned, and feelings realized. “Dashy. I love you.” I said out loud to everyone in the room. I heard the eight ponies gasp, just before I fell unconscious, and started reliving my memories.
I awoke to find the same eight gathered around me. At first I could only hear voices, as I had yet to open my eyes, but I knew the sound of their voices.
“When do you think he will wake up?” Rainbow Dash.
“I don’t know, he has been asleep for almost six weeks now.” Twilight.
‘So I have been asleep for, wait, ALMOST SIX WEEKS! Damn, just a shorter time to decide.’ I thought, my eyes still closed.
“I know. We keep visiting him every day, but he doesn’t seem to change” Rarity.
“Ah’ve been meaning to ask you two about this, but what are y’all visiting White Wind for?” Applejack. “Ah mean, you two are princesses.”
“I feel a sense of worry for him, as I do all my subjects, but I also feel worry because he has been teaching me.” Celestia.
“I am here because I have been watching his dreams for a while now. I don’t think he was lying to you Rainbow Dash when he said that he loved you. He has been dreaming of both his past, and of you.” Luna said, not using her R.C.V. as she had apparently not been using it since she was in this room. “Speaking of which, I can tell you that he is awake, and has been listening to us for a while now, as he has stopped dreaming.”
I sat up, turned my head towards where Luna’s voice came from, and complained. “Damn it Luna, I was enjoying the conversation. I was learning things.”
“He’s awake! He’s awake!” Pinkie Pie was jumping up and down.
“Um, it’s good to see that you are awake, Mr. White Wind sir.” Fluttershy said, still in her whisper like voice.
Uncomfortable with the attention, I decided to shift it in the best way I knew how, or rather by a way I picked up recently. “So, Rainbow Dash, I would like to know how you feel.”
Everyone turned to look at Rainbow Dash, who tried to avoid the question, “Feel about what?”
“I would hope that the question was clear. But just in case, you know how I feel about you, so I would like to know how you feel about me.”
“Oh, that. Well you see, I, um…” her voice trailed off, and I knew the answer. I attempted to get up, but was restrained by a yellowish magic. I looked around to see every pony, except for Celestia who had also picked up on the vibe, still looking at Dashy.
“Actually, we all would also like to know” Twilight said.
“YAH! TELL US! TELL US! TELL US!” Where Pinkie gets all this energy, I will never know.
“You know what,” I started, causing everyone to turn back to me, and Celestia releasing her magic grip, “I won’t make you tell. Besides, I think I know already how you feel.” I heard a sigh from Dashy, and received a nod from Celestia. “Whatever Celestia,” Everyone turned to Celestia now, “I don’t need you as my voice of conscience.” This time when I tried to get up, I was not stopped. I proceeded to open a window, only to have a pink cloud, raining a brown liquid. Pinkie Pie decided to drink the liquid and declared that it was chocolate milk.
“Come with me everypony,” Celestia said, “We have something very important to talk about.”
We all followed Celestia, and along the way, Luna slipped away. We reached a hall full of large stain glass windows, and Celestia said something about Discord, and the Elements of Harmony. Celestia opened a door, withdrew a box, opened it, and declared that the Elements where missing.
This ‘Discord’ appeared and gave a riddle. “Twists and turns, are my master plan. Then find the elements back where you began."
“Twists and turns, twists and turns… The Canterlot Labyrinth! The Elements of Harmony must be there!” The six ponies raced off, leaving me to follow, and Celestia to stand there, watching us. On my way out, Luna pulled me aside.
“What are you, and are you a threat to us?” she asked threateningly, but not in her RCV. Something must have occurred to have her not use it, but I didn’t inquire.
“If you were watching my memories like you said, you should know what I am. And the only threat that I am, is that I occasionally mess with ponies minds, like I have yours, and even then, rarely.” I hissed back. “Now if you excuse me, I have a pony I would like to be with currently, to make sure that she stays out of harm.”
I raced away and to the labyrinth, only to find that the six were gone and no entrance to the labyrinth was visible.
“Oh, a new player I see, and you were also in the hallway, how fun. I wonder what made you be so late? Why don’t you go in, and meet with your friends in the center?” a column of shrub came down and I started towards the opening. “Not so fast,” the voice said, still bodiless, “There is a certain, ‘No wings, no magic rule.” My wings disappeared. I didn’t mind it that much, and continued to the opening.
I entered, the gap closing behind me, and the voice echoed again, and I followed it, “There is also a rule where everypony must participate. Either of these rules are broken, and it’s game over.”
“If everypony must participate, then why are there only seven ponies in this labyrinth? I saw plenty of ponies outside, going about their days. If every pony has to participate, then why are they not in here as well?” I retorted, stopping in my tracks when I reached a fork, waiting to hear the voice again.
“Good point. Hmm, let me see, oh I know, because I don’t feel like including them.” I continued to follow the voice.
“And what is with this ‘No wings’ rule? One of the best parts of becoming a pony, was getting wings!” I said trying to get it to keep talking.
Suddenly, the thing belonging to the voice showed up in front of me. “Becoming a pony? Does that mean you weren’t always a pony?” Discord asked.
I pounced on it, falling on its neck with a single hoof. “My name is Mathew. Nice to meet you.” I said, ignoring the question raised at me, and pressed down harder, causing him to disappear.
I wandered further, unable to get him to talk more. I soon found myself confronted by a winged Rainbow Dash. “Mathew, I love you,” She said. I ignored her, and continued past her. It was obvious that Discord was trying to trick me. First the image he showed me violated his first rule, and second, Dashy didn’t know my real name. However, the illusion proceeded to follow me, this time the wings were gone. “Why did you ignore me?” it said, ticked. I just continued to ignore it. “Mathew, stop!” I didn’t stop, and continued to walk forward.
The fake Rainbow disappeared, and was replaced by Discord, who was now in front of me once again. I leapt for his neck again, and landed a second time. He obviously didn’t learn the first time. “How did you know that that wasn’t the real Rainbow Dash?” he asked, no sign that he was bothered by the hoof on his nick.
“Simple,” I replied, leaving it at that. “Now take me to the others.” As I said this, I noticed that all the hedges were falling down. Discord disappeared once more, and I saw five ponies standing not too far from my right. I went over to them, and learned that Rainbow Dash had flown off. I also learned fairly quickly that four of the five where complete opposites of how they use to be. I started to laugh when Discord appeared and gave us back our wings and horns.
“HEY!” Pinkie shouted at me, “STOP LAUGHING AT ME!” I ignored her and continued laughing, Discord enjoying the show. “I SAID STOP LAUGHING!” She continued to shout.
“Discord, you truly are a joke!” I said getting up and stopped laughing.
“Oh and why is that?” He asked.
“Because you never learn.” I jumped back onto Discord’s neck.
“White Wind, get off of him!” Twilight almost yelled.
“White Wind? I thought your name was Mathew.” Discord interjected, my hoof still on his neck.
“Mathew? His name is White Wind.” Twilight said before I could say anything.
“Actually, you are both correct.” I didn’t elaborate on the topic. “Now if you will excuse me, I have a pony to talk to.” I took off, leaving the six behind, and went to find Dashy, who I found on a cloud not too far from Ponyville.
“Hey Dashy, what’s up?”
“Nothing much, and you?”
“I came to find you actually. I know I put you in an awkward position back in Canterlot, and I think I know how you feel, but I would like to still hear it from you.”
“Hear what?” she asked, knowing full well what I was asking of her.
“Once again, I am asking you how you feel about me,” getting tired of this situation.
“I couldn’t care less about you.” Rainbow said without hesitation.
“It sure didn’t seem that way back in Canterlot, and now that I think about it, it didn’t seem that way for quite a while back in Ponyville.” I retorted.
“I just didn’t want to hurt your feelings. I couldn’t care less as to what happens to you. All I care about is Cloudsdale.”
“So you wouldn’t care if I just left this world?”
“Nope.”
Well that conversation cleared any mind. I went to my cubical house that was currently a 100X50X50, with bare minimum on the extra room. I grabbed a parachute, strapped myself into it, and went six kilometers in the air, the exact point where I appeared in Equestria. I stopped flapping, causing me to fall, and I instantly shifted into a nose dive. I counted as I fell: 4100, 4000, 3900, 3800… I reached the count of 2000 before the lights started to appear. The same way that they first had. I reached my count of 1000 when something happened on the ground. A rainbow had appeared, broke into two, and created a dome. Everything was back to normal, but I continued to fall, my mind made up. I reached around 500 meters before anypony took notice of me, but they didn’t bother doing anything. They thought that I was diving again normally, the fools. I was almost there, the lights had at this point, stopped moving.
I was two feet from the ground when the ponies realized that I wasn’t changing my course. My adrenalin was pumping again. Millimeters away, I was once again transported from the ground, into the air, two kilometers up this time, though. I reset my count to adjust for the height change. 1800, 1700, 1600… I hit my target height of one kilometer, and deployed my parachute, which opened this time. I landed without a hitch, and went to my plain, old, wooden house. Looking at the calendar, which my son or I, usually kept accurate, I saw something that caught my eye. I decided to check it with multiple sources, my phone, my computer, even my neighbor. They all said the same thing. It was March 3rd, the same day that I had left to go parachuting. I thought it impossible, then remembered the past few weeks that I had lived as a pony, and discounted ‘Impossible’. I then remembered Rainbow Dash, and put her in the back of my mind. Checking the time, I went out, picking my son up from school. ___ ___ ___ The End
