Entry Twenty
Headache
To say that the Combine were unprepared is to say Genghis Khan dabbled in real estate. It was a total rout. Before three hours had passed, we had claimed every single Combine facility on Earth, and I was already at work hacking into their control signals in an attempt to free humanity from their control, as well as un-brainwashing those that had been enslaved. Admittedly, their control signals were rather difficult to crack...mostly because they were programmed not to accept command prompts above a certain processing speed, for some reason.
However, between the hacking and the claiming of facilities...my girls found something better. Though what awaited them at the other end couldn't possibly have been worse.
Video below...
"Is...is this what I think it is?" Chell asked hopefully as the group stared at the strange device.
Chell and Gilda had decided to focus their efforts on the most heavily defended Combine facility on the planet, with serious backup. Cave, Assphalt, Pea-Brain, and Cuddle Core all had been given massive combat upgrades, and Different had been loaded down with nano-spray to patch everyone up at need. Right now, they were in the heart of the facility, and in the exact center of the central chamber was a large, round platform that glowed with light similar to that given off by active Portals. Cave was presently hacking the controls to determine its nature.
"Looks like some sorta telepad," Gilda pointed out bluntly.
"That's exactly what it is," Cave stated as he disconnected from the controls, popping his chassis open to realign his laser weaponry. "Specifically, it's the Combine's attempts at reverse engineering what Wheatley was able to give them about how Portal technology worked. The really important thing, however, is where the other end is."
"And where is it?" Chell demanded insistently.
"Combine Central Command," Cave explained. "The facility that controls the entirety of the Combine civilization...which is apparently hive mind and wired through that central facility. If we're able to take control of that facility..."
"We'll take over the Combine," Chell murmured in awe. "We'll take back Earth..."
"Earth nothing, we'll have everything!" Gilda snapped out. "It's time for a hostile takeover!"
"There's a problem, though," Cave pointed out. "Without the proper codes, the only way to activate it is to fire a portal onto the warp plate. But that will only be a one way trip. So...if we go and can't take control of the facility, we'll never get back to Earth...and will probably die when we eventually run out of ammo. We go in...no retreat."
"Be sure to save before going!" Different chimed happily.
"So it's victory or death, is it?" Chell murmured. She pointed her Portal gun at the plate. "I like those odds."
She fired.
When the blaze of light finally cleared, the group was somewhere completely different. "Girls, keep your hardsuits sealed!" Cave ordered over Core-to-suit comms. "The atmosphere is not Nitrogen based, and very Earth unfriendly!"
Chell glanced around curiously. "Is this Mars?" she asked in surprise.
"No, definitely much further than that," Cave corrected. "Why?"
"Cause this looks exactly like the original Doom recreated in Minecraft," Chell pointed out. "Well...except those charging robotic demons are a lot less blocky."
"Probably a lot less tasty, too," Gilda observed as she bisected the closest one with her wing. "Let's go!"
The group continued their charge deeper into the facility, hacking, blasting, and even punching their way through the defenses as they gathered the keys they needed to get deeper. As they charged, things remained much as Chell remembered from playing Doom long ago before Glados took over Aperture...but certain differences were very concerning. Every so often, they'd come across tech that was decidedly Aperture Science...or at the very least reverse engineered, and the deeper they went the more there was.
"Where did they get so much of my stuff?" Cave demanded angrily.
"Wheatley must have been very useful to them," Gilda growled angrily, clenching her talons.
As more Aperture tech appeared the deeper they went, they began following the trail of greater Aperture tech to lead them to the center of the facility. Before long, they came across a tunnel that so resembled the path to Glados' chamber in Aperture it looked like it had been transplanted. Knowing they had reached the center, Assphalt and Pea-Brain took point as they charged down the tunnel.
The massive chamber it opened up to was filled with an ominous red light. Computer consoles lined the edges, with cables leading into a deep pit in the center. The floor pulsed red as though it were alive. The group immediately parted in search of some sign of control circuitry.
"Any luck?" Cave called out after a time. Negative responses greeted the call.
"Found something!" Different called out.
The group gathered at Different's position...where they found a 'Substitute Core Attachment Apparatus', like what Wheatley had used to take control of Aperture from Glados both times he'd done so. "What would something like this be doing here?" Chell wondered in confusion.
"The Genetic Lifeform And Disc Operating System is a very effective central core unit," Cave pointed out. "It can handle massive amounts of data at computer speeds, but with instinctive responses that only a living brain can produce. If Wheatley was able to give the Combine the concept behind it, it would only make sense for them to reproduce it to manage the entirety of their empire."
"This is good news for us!" Gilda proclaimed. "If we can find their Central Control Unit, we can plug Dad into it and take control of the entire thing in one fell swoop!"
"Central Core Unit?" a terrifyingly familiar voice spoke up. "I can help you with that."
Out of the center of the deep pit rose what looked like a black, bio-metal snake...with a Core with a glowing blue optic at the tip. "Except...I won't," he greeted wickedly. "Ha, suck it!"
The entire group gasped before taking combat stances, one name on all their lips.
"Wheatley!"
......they cloned the moron.....Just how many of the moron are there? or.....oh poop you don't think they reprogrammed Space Core? also where's companion CUBE!
What a twist!!!
did you mean to use the Genghis Khan line in both fics? cause if so i question the implications of coco and glados having enough similar trains of thought to come up with it...
I thought Weatley died to easily last time
Although how are combine surviving with a Core designed to make idiotic decisions?
That moron... in charge of the entire Combine.... HOW THE HELL HAVE THEY NOT BEEN WIPED OUT YET???? I hope Gilda and Chell enjoy ripping him apart.
Meanwhile, Glados decided to place Gordon Freeman in a relaxation vault before they attacked. And... uh.. also saved Black Mesa along the way.
Wonder why?
Oh dear.
You'd take over the Combine.
Smart.
I'm sure the Klingons and Jem'Hadar would agree with you. As would the Roman Gladiators.
How do you know what Minecraft is?
Fair point.
Hello, moron.
how the buck did he live
8008341
I think That is why it took them only 3 hours to take over every earthly combine facility.
Unless Weatley has managed to evolve beyond his original programing. I mean, I don't pretend to know anything about Combine tech (my knowings of Half-Life come from the youtube thing Gorgeous Freedman) but I do know that most AI can adapt and evolve if given the chance.
GODDAMMIT WHEATLY JUST F OFF NOBODY LIKES YOU
YOU MORON
My one rule when it comes to games with quick save: "save and save often."
Oh, it's you again. I don't know how you survived but I will enjoy killing you, you moronic excuse for a stupidity core. You don't know what I just said do you? Well let me go a bit slower; you are a moron. Yes that's right, I called you a moron. How does that make you feel? Oh wait, I know! It makes you feel like -what else- a moron.
I'm going to go out on a limb and call dream sequence. After all, where is the One Free Man?
Oh no, Wheatley!
I'm not sure I'm liking how easily they're doing everything, though. Sure there's Wheatley, but it just feels like all the conflicts are being resolved too easily, that there's no real stakes.
Even with his new form, I still find Wheatley funny, due to his dialogue
8008310 I figured I wasn't the only one who noticed that
8008528 Amen...
Evil Overlord Rule #34: I will not turn into a snake. It never helps.
8008391 except that, with the exception of Cave, and possibly now GlaDOS if they unlocked her access after finding Cave, it seems like every Aperture Core is Hard Coded to perform certain tasks. This Hard Code determines their purpose.
Wheatley's reason for existence is to be an idiot. Now, it could be possible to un-shackle him from his Directive Hard Coding, but it'd probably be easier to just use his brain as a template to make a new Core...
I feel like I read this yesterday in Dressed to Steal. This strikes me as strange.
Headache
To say that the Combine were unprepared is to say Genghis Khan dabbled in real estate. It was a total route.
This is a double negative:
The combine were unprepared. Not prepared for the attack.
Genghis Khan dabbled in real estate. He did not.(technically he conquered stuff)
Having them both together negates the first negative turning it into a positive.
the Combine were prepared.
If I am reading that right and you were not being sarcastic about Genghis Khan.
(did this on my phone sorry it is so bad.)
8008854 I believe it was meant to express just how unprepared the combine were. Also Genghis Khan did a ton of real estate work, with "some" aggressive buying tactics.
Now if you'll excuse me I was writing stuff for english class and I believe I am still writing like I am answering questions for it.
8008678
8008528
Control-Z saves lives, you know.
Wheatley was helpful to aliens?
HA! Sure, and my personal astromech is a salvaged CL4TP unit.
As it went on, I kind of expected Alt-universe Evil Glados, not him. And yeah, this all seems too easy.
Also note that the G-man may have something to say about all this eventually.
As much as I love this, did they seriously just miss the ultimate opportunity for Gordon and Chell to go into combat together and left him faninted in a field?
8010036
*looks at the decidedly CL4PTP like droid*
*looks back at Defender, Shrugs*
8010230
Or better yet, alt-universe evil CelestAI
I am fully suspending any and all disbelief.
Also, I think Gilda can go home using Combined technology.
And Chell ia acting like the Doom Guy.
Nope, not gonna do a "X confirmed setting again."
We have two too many.
8010417 I call him High-Five.
8008358
I think the Combine made him several bodies connected by a... hmm, "hivemind" and "central intelligence" both seem wrong for some reason.
(The reason is Wheatley.)
What if it's like The Everywhere Man from "The Batman" where the OG Wheatley is the good guy and his Combine Clones are Evil Wheatley.
...also I vote to kill G-Man on sight.
8011304
*looks at the droid and its three fingered hands*
*Shrug intensifies*
*Notices lack of Next button.*
NOOOOOOO!!!
I came up with the funniest Snickers commercial in my head. Basically it involves Luna being Nightmare Moon when she's hungry and another princess gives her a Snickers, stating that she gets a little tyrannical when she's hungry.
hu..2nd time reading.. and only NOW I need to refrence an old game.. *puts a top hat on* "and remember.." *lifts it reviling a smaller me* "save it now.." *the smaller me lifts it's hat reviling an even smaller me!* "or risk doing it again!"
Like
Fuck
This
Doom in Minecraft in Portal... Huh.
I like the fact that you actually crossed Black Mesa and Portal, given that they are supposed to be in the same world and it was in the song.
8792124
Minecraft AND Portal?! I've only seen such raw power once before... but... that would mean... Stanly is the key to everything - do not save the baby
8792124
Hey, with Minecraft it's like a rule of the internet: if it exists, there is probably a mod to add it to Minecraft. Case in point, the Cyber demon from Doom and the HEV suit from Half-Life (among many other things) are added in the TechGuns mod; Portal guns and some testing elements in the PortalGun mod; and the Gravity Gun from the mod of the same name.
https://en.dopl3r.com/memes/dank/asia-exists-genahis-khan-lassical-art-memes-facebookcomclassicalartmemes-free-real-estate/483252
Whale this was thoroughly enjoyable and a great sequel to portal 2/half life
Sound really stupid in reality. But it feels like something from the half-life's plotline.
Not really.
Just like any antaganist of OC fanfic. He can keep coming back again and again despite his stupidity somehow.