The next day, they walked up the hill towards the stone building. Odd scorch marks licked parts of the solid stone, but it was otherwise in fine condition at a glance. A small sign hung over the door that read, 'Restful Oak, where troubled minds are put to rest'.
Willow had opted to not follow after them, "I'm not an adventurer, and I'm not here to do random acts of pity. Put that pony's fears to rest if you must, I'll be here."
Applejack approached the simple wooden door and gave the knob a turn. Just inside was much dimmer than outside. The occasional wall-mounted sconce dispelled utter darkness with flickering light. Seated behind a desk was a tired-looking earth pony mare. She looked up at the lot of them as they entered. "Hello. Welcome to Restful Oak." She paused to yawn widely and shook herself out. "Excuse me. How can I help you today?"
Applejack smiled at the presumed secretary. "Howdy. We don't mean ta be intrudin', we're just checkin' on one of tha patients. Fella by tha name of Whipmane?"
The secretary pulled open a drawer full of folders and began flipping through them. "Whipmane... Whipmane... Ah, here we are." She pulled out a folder in her teeth and set it on the counter before flipping it open. "Sorry I'm so tired today. One of the other desk attendants just quit, leaving me holding the bag. Hmm, are you related to the patient?"
Applejack started to shake her head when Sweetie Belle suddenly spoke up, "Oh yes. Poor Whipmane. We're very worried about him and just want him to know his family's here to support him." Applejack frowned a little but didn't counter the lie verbally.
The secretary smiled. "That's very sweet. So many patients are practically abandoned until they're cured. It's always nice to see a supportive family." Her eyes settled on Sunflower with a bit of confusion. "And you are?"
Sweetie slid in front of him. "He's just here to keep us company, and Whipmane knows him. Family friend."
"How nice." She smiled gently and tapped the folder with a hoof. "Whipmane is making excellent progress and should be ready in about a month."
With the secretary's attention off of him, Sunflower edged himself quietly towards the swinging doors that led further inside. He poked his head past them a moment before jerking his head back and slipping back to the others. He whispered harshly to the girls, "It's scary in there!"
The secretary's ears perked up. "Restful Oak isn't scary, little boy. We heal minds here. We've taken killers and turned them into model citizens, undone--" She paused for another wide yawn, "senility, and restored so many to wholeness. This is good work."
Applejack tipped her head. "Well we're mighty pleased ta hear Whipmane's doin' OK. Can we see him?"
Sweetie raised a hoof. "He'll be so happy to see his family's cheering him on!"
She tilted her head a little. "I really can't do that. Patients are to be isolated until treatment is completed. You seem like a very nice person...?"
"Sweetie Belle."
"Yes, Sweetie Belle." She gave a slow nod. "I'm Cindy Meadows. My family's worked here since, oh... I couldn't even say. A few hundred years now, each in the name of the Moon Princess, may she banish the fogs from our minds." A new yawn escaped her. "If only that stallion hadn't quit."
Applejack cleared her throat softly. "So, problem with the help?"
Cindy shook her head. "Oh no, that makes it sound like I'm in charge. I just help out, but yes. They try to hire others to help me, but they always quit a few weeks in. I don't understand it. It's not a bad job, and pays well enough." She sagged onto a hoof. "Well, sorry I can't help more. You all have a nice day." In a moment, she had faded from the world, sleeping with soft snores.
Applejack looked down at the others. "She reminds me of a mare ah met in Viljatown. Anywho, ah don't see nothing wrong here."
Sunflower pointed towards the double doors. "There is definitely something wrong here!"
Apple Bloom turned to Sunflower. "How wrong are we talkin' here?"
Sunflower tapped fingers together thoughtfully. "On a scale of 'bad color choice for the wallpaper' at one to 'The world's falling apart into pudding' at ten, I'd say seven?"
Scootaloo tilted her head. "Seven on the crazy scale? That's pretty bad." All the girls nodded in agreement.
Applejack looked baffled as the children all agreed on this scale so effortlessly. "It can't be that bad. Wait here." She advanced on the swinging doors and casually brushed past them into the dark hallway beyond. The lighting was even darker than the front lobby. A soft tension began to mount immediately in Applejack's chest as a strange creeping dread built within her. She heard a howl of pain come from somewhere deeper in the building and she immediately backpedaled into the front room, shivering from hooves to the top of her head. "Ah could be wrong..."
Cindy awoke with a snort. Her head fell off her hoof and she thunked onto the desk before she could rouse herself and sit up. "Oh, you're still here? Are you going to wait for your kin? That's very sweet, but he's not scheduled for at least a few weeks. Go on home, we'll send him your way." She smiled with a sincere warmth.
Applejack thrust a hoof at the doors. "Ah heard somepony screaming in there! What kinda operation is this anyway?"
Cindy tilted her head. "Some of the procedures are a little rough, but we only use them when other, gentler therapies have failed. Rest assured, we only act in our patient's best interest. We've never failed to cure someone before." She rest her head on her hooves. "The doctors are really amazing here."
Applejack was not appeased, and clopped a hoof on the stone floor. "Ah'd like ta speak to one of these doctors of yers"
Cindy rose to her hooves and trotted towards the doors. "Alright. I'll see if any of them are available." And she was gone quickly.
Applejack tapped her chin lightly. "Huh, ah expected her ta put up more of a fight than that."
Sweetie pointed after her. "She seems nice, real nice."
Apple Bloom shrugged. "Maybe she's just doin' her job?"
Scootaloo pointed at the doors. "We could go look around now?"
Applejack quickly shook her head. "Nothin' doin'. We'll wait fer that doctor fella to show up first."
An earth pony emerged from the back in a doctor's lab coat and a stethoscope hanging around his neck. He smiled at the group and approached. "Good afternoon. I'm Doctor Macintosh."
Applejack recoiled. "Wha?"
He tilted his head at Applejack. "The secretary said you were agitated." He began to circle around Applejack. He didn't look anything like Applejack, with sandy yellow fur and a creamy stripe along his undercarriage. His cutie mark was concealed by his outfit. "Have you always been so easily confused by basic statements?"
Applejack's confusion only grew worse. "Uh... Sorry, that's just mah brother's name is all."
The doctor reached out and poked Applejack on her apples. "You're also an Apple? How wonderful! I've never treated family before."
"Treated?!" Applejack went rigid. "Ah don't need no treatments, thank ya kindly."
He shook his head. "Your agitation's only getting worse. Relax, we're here to help." He made a sudden flick of his head, and a dart was sticking out of Applejack's flank.
Applejack squeaked in surprise and discomfort and wheeled on the doctor. "Ah'll show you what ya get when... ya..." She slumped to the ground, falling asleep instantly. The Crusaders quickly rallied between her and the doctor.
Apple Bloom clopped the floor. "Get away from mah big sister!"
Scootaloo drew her rapier, willing it to ignite and waving it at Macintosh. Sunflower drew his mace in readiness.
Cindy emerged from the back and frowned. "What's going on? No fighting! This is a place of healing." She moved between the Crusaders and Macintosh. "I thought you were such nice children. If you can't behave, you'll just have to go."
Scootaloo looked less certain about striking Cindy. "Uh, alright, but we're taking Applejack with us."
"Out of the question." Macintosh frowned. "She is clearly suffering from a number of psychosis and mental traumas. She needs treatment immediately."
Apple Bloom drew out an explosive packet, but was snatched from the ground in the mouth of Cindy. "No! Bad!" Cindy trotted out and tossed Apple Bloom into the dirt. "We'll take good care of your sister, don't worry." The doctor snatched up Scootaloo next, only to be swatted by Sunflower's mace. "Cindy, this one has violent tendencies. Bring him for treatment as well."
Sunflower paled and shrank back. He was more slippery than his equine friends and darted away from reaching mouths. Soon he was outside with Apple Bloom and Scootaloo, and they made no attempt to follow him there. Sweetie had never entered the brawl and she smiled sweetly. "Can I go with Applejack?"
Cindy shook her head. "She needs peace and quiet to heal. You're a good filly." Cindy patted Sweetie on the head gently. "Go on with your friends. We'll return Applejack to you better than ever."
Sweetie Belle joined her friends outside with a pout. "Well, that didn't work..."
Apple Bloom stomped in place, throwing a little fit. "They have mah sister! We've got ta rescue her, now!"
Scootaloo sheathed her sword. "I think it's time for subtlety."
Sunflower bobbed his head in agreement. "We sneak in, find Applejack, and get her out. No more talking."
Sweetie crept up on the door leading into the building and peeked inside. "She looks like she's already falling asleep again."
Scootaloo grinned. "Great! As soon as she conks out again, we'll dash across and get inside." She held out a hoof towards the others. "We'll get AJ back." Her hoof was met with two others and a paw and they all nodded to each other, determined in their new assignment.
It wasn't long until Cindy was lightly dozing at her desk, head resting on her hooves and quiet little snores coming from her. Sweetie waved to the others, and they crept as one across the lobby. Cindy snorted softly, adjusting in a fitful bit of movement. They froze in place, eyes locked on her as she yawned and flopped down onto her forelegs instead, falling back to slumber. With a silent sigh of relief, Scootaloo dashed ahead and slipped through the sliding doors.
They had made it, but did they really want to be here? The oppressive gloom and building dread made them huddle together in the dark hallway. There was no sign of Applejack, Doctor Macintosh, or any other idea of where to go from there.
Just a suggestion:
The next day, they walked up the hill. Willow had opted to not follow after them,
"I'm not an adventurer, and I'm not here to do random acts of pity. Put that pony's fears to rest if you must, I'll be here."
Odd scorch marks licked parts of the solid stone building, but it was otherwise in fine condition at a glance. A small sign over the door read, 'Restful Oak, Where Troubled Minds are Put to Rest.'
checkin'
doin'
moment, she
definitely
I guess that's as subtle as Scootaloo gets? :)
I'm sorry but the diagnosis doesn't look good for the typos
5954464 Scootaloo, master of subtlety!
A small sign "rested" over the door (though I'd change that altogether to "hung").
A "tired-looking" earth pony mare.
Put a comma after "well."
It's not an error per se, but you can get rid of the comma after "gentler."
She flopped down onto her "forelegs" instead.
Also, you use the phrase "in place" in the previous sentence as well as here; I'd recommend deleting it from this sentence.
Saw it coming but this drama here keep a story interesting.
ABs going to need a bigger bomb.
Hey look, a distraction. Where. That hole in the wall. What hole in the BOOM
Strange persons experimenting are not usually persons but cultists or entities using forms of persons.
Necromancers?
5954531 Fixed!
5954523 No battlecry or anything!
Oooh! This just got REAL interesting! <3
Also, I am pretty sure one of those psychotic typos got you in the previous chapter. I couldn't read that crazy comment at all!
Well, sh--
That's some heavy character development, right there
Oh, never mind.
Well, they have to stay in business somehow. Still, with inmates running the asylum, this may prove tricky. Here's hoping AJ's sanity can stay intact until the rest of the party finds her, and that they can get out. Irrational ponies like these probably won't believe any attempt to demonstrate sanity; after all, that's just denial.
5954565 This chapter kicks off the first of what will likely be several side treks. In fact, I shouldn't really say "the first," because that particular notation goes to the extended dungeon romp to fund Willow's resurrection, but I'll just wave that off as saying that it's the first since they started their trek to Viljatown.
I continue to be disappointed in Willow. Even overlooking how she's apparently backsliding from how she was beginning to appreciate an altruistic take on life, I can't believe that she's willing to sit back and let her son go adventuring without so much as batting an eye. There's a line between allowing your child freedom to grow and being neglectful as a parent. It's not like she's got anything better to do, either - she's literally just back at the hotel twiddling her thumbs! The only possible excuse here is that she doesn't think that this outing will be dangerous, but even that seems thin, if for no other reason than everything has been dangerous up until now, so why wouldn't a trip to a freaking asylum in the middle of nowhere be the same?
I hate to say this, but if this is how much affection she can bring herself to display - and I'm remembering how nonchalant she seemed mere moments after being brought back from the dead, as well - then I'm wondering if the reason her husband left her was really for money.
That said, the two new characters introduced in this chapter were rather interesting. Cindy - and I can't get over how un-pony that name is - is endearing right off the bat; it helps that she's apparently cut from the same cloth as Drowsy, something even Applejack noted. However, while I do think that she's being sincere in her protesting that there's nothing suspicious at all about Restful Oak, that implies that she's a rather dim bulb. Simply put, when you have that much weird stuff going on - staff members "quitting" on a regular basis for no apparent reason, doctors just deciding to commit people that walk through the front door, etc. - then you're either a collaborator or an idiot. Maybe the doctor(s) prescribed her some medication that make her weak-willed and pliable?
On the other hand, Doctor Macintosh is interesting mostly insofar as his weird connection to the Apple family. I'm honestly not sure what to make of that. Is this some weird case of dimensional parallelism, like with Canterlot High School? Or is it just that "Apple" is a relatively common family name, even across dimensions (a la family names like "Jones" or "Wong" in our world). Or, heck, maybe Applejack isn't the first member of her family to visit Everglow? Personally I'd prefer to think of it as just an incredibly, improbably weird coincidence, but who knows how it may turn out.
Beyond the characters though, the setup for what's about to come is somewhat prosaic simply for how predictable it is. From the moment we heard "he hasn't come back from the asylum," we could all guess that it would involve mad doctors and medical torture, and this chapter confirmed our suspicions without hesitating. Leaving aside the issue of why local law enforcement is so completely useless, even when the doctor is openly kidnapping people on such flimsy excuses, the premise of how things will go isn't that hard to determine. While the specifics aren't something that can be nailed down, we can all guess that this will proceed in an arc reminiscent of The House on Haunted Hill, except without the ghosts (probably).
It would have been rather amusing if the cliche had been inverted, and the asylum really was just a benign asylum, where the treatment was humane and only being used on patients that really did need help. But that ship seems to have sailed (and honestly, a straight reversal of a cliche isn't that much better than a straight cliche).
5954836 This has been proven to be a fact with completely rational doctors in the real world. Proving sanity is almost impossible.
5954860 No breaks are given to the crew, but they have the will to survive! A lot of your comments would require wild spoilers to be set loose, causing havoc in the small town.
I will say this! The players in my weekly Ponyfinder game are likely rolling around in their seats with giggles, because they've been into this place before. They met the ancestor of Cindy, and they know exactly what's going on and why. It's a great deal of fun to turn that game into a story, and I'm really really looking forward to the next chapter, muah ha ha ha.
Is tthis based on a real campaign? Because I played one very closemto this.
5955050 Well it's based on the Ponyfinder Campaign Setting, but I never did a formal adventure writeup for Everrain. The sanitarium is mentioned in the book, but not too much more than that it exists and what may lurk beneath it.
5955079 yeah I did a campaign with the sanatorium before... please dont make a character named bookbook.. he still wakes me screaming at night.
5955179 I have no plans in mind that involve a Bookbook, so your sanity is safe, for now.
this is not a good thing.
and I would not want to be around when AJ come too.
Umm... I see one tiny little mistake with this.
Why didn't they go tell the towns ponies? They would mob the place and kill all the docters who have stolen, hurt, or even killed and mutalated their friends and family.
5956478 The CMC went into a dangerous situation without consulting with adults?
This is completely out of character!(sarcasm meter overload!)
Something tells me this place is less dedicated to the Moon Princess than it is the Night Mare...
6178495 Well... actually it's kind of influenced by horrible things from beyond.
Money is on mind flayers or cultists