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Self-endorsing Drivel

FanNotANerd shane_k_abernethy@yahoo.ca Xbox Live - Abernacky FanNotANerd
User ID: 3,799
Registered: 15th Nov 2011
Last Seen: 7h, 46m ago
Story views: 91,128

I bid you welcome to the profile of none other than the great FanNotANerd, author, musician, biology major, scrollsaw artist, Canadian and all-around great guy! Is there no end to my talents? If there is, it probably inhabits the same indistinct plane as my modesty.

I regard most of my writing as an experiment, and am always glad to get feedback, be it positive or negative. The absolute last thing I want is for you guys to humour me.

I also pre-read for Bronius Maximus, who's kind enough to return the favour. He's recently broken 1500 followers, and seems to be making it his life's work to make me look bad. I like to think it's because some of my awesomeness rubbed off on him, but he's just a legitimately good author, and a hell of a lot more prolific than me.

Now I'm sure you're all wondering: what's this guy's claim to fame? Why should I pay attention to his deluded ramblings? The answer is this: because.

Hey, to be honest, I have no idea what half of you like about me so much. So if you were expecting a more wholesome answer, you're as lost as I am.

Incoherent Jumbles of Words


There, They're...

Throughout all of history, one concept has kept both the written and spoken word from becoming an unintelligible mess. That concept is that most holy of grounds known by some as "grammar." It sets down rules for language to follow, and keeps it free of distortion.

Yet something is wrong. The rules are failing. And only one pony so much as suspects that something is wrong. Something that goes deeper than a simple appearance of errors. Something that could be an attack on the very root of language itself.

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14,362 words ( 4 chapters ) · 10,000 views  ·  858  ·  13  · 

Shadows on the Rising Star

Dreams. In some ways they are the most delicate, ephemeral part of one's consciousness. In others, they are a direct path to the mind's deepest hidden desires, fears and doubts. Despite this, ponies are told from a young age that they are harmless. That dreams have no power over them. That they hold nothing that must be feared.

Nothing... save the nightmares that strive to prove them wrong.

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2,847 words · 334 views  ·  37  ·  2  · 

Sauerkraut

Twilight hates it.

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2,724 words · 430 views  ·  31  ·  1 · gore  · 

Pinkie π

Pie. There's nothing Pinkie likes better. Up until this point, she thought she'd experienced just about everything related to it.

But Twilight has a decidedly different application for pie. And it doesn't involve eating it.

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3,953 words · 768 views  ·  80  ·  4  · 

Eh?

Ah, the tropics. Sand, sun, and all the fruity cocktails your liver can handle. Just spend the day lying on the beach, soaking up the sun and listening to the waves gently lap against the shore...

Too bad you don't get any of that in the frozen north. A hideous mix-up has sent the mane six to the far northern land of Caneighda. But this land of ice and snow is quick to reveal a deeper, hidden warmth. You just have to look at it the right way.

Disclaimer: I am Canadian, so I'm exempt from any flak you might decide to throw at me because of the stereotypes I use.

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10,356 words · 1,126 views  ·  75  ·  2  · 

Stroke of Midnight

In the long-forgotten past, the solar princess welcomed a black unicorn into Canterlot Castle. He was an artist who quickly found a place in the hearts of all who met him. His name, likened to the colour of his coat, was Midnight.

Nearly a millennium later, the discovery of an unusual book leads Twilight to Canterlot. And directly into a whirlwind of events where the secrets of the past are finally brought to light...even as all is eclipsed in madness...

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23,447 words ( 5 chapters ) · 466 views  ·  25  ·  1 · gore  · 

Why Didn't Ah Stay at Th' Farm?

A...minor accident at Sweet Apple Acres sends Big Macintosh to Ponyville in the middle of applebuck season. At first, things seem fine. But then some of the mares begin acting a little...oddly.

Then very oddly. Turns out every other stallion skipped town for a very good reason.

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5,659 words ( 2 chapters ) · 73,192 views  ·  876  ·  34 · sex  · 

Hush Now, Quiet Now...

The nightmares had been haunting her. Robbing her of sleep, the one refuge every sentient being deserves. They all said they'd help her. But she knew they were lying. They just needed an excuse.

But she wasn't going to give it to them.

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2,584 words · 1,450 views  ·  14  ·  4 · gore  · 

I'll Fly Higher

She had always been a pony that could be looked up to. Someone who seemed to know exactly what to do in any situation. But history tells time and time again that nopony is invincible.

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1,571 words · 3,362 views  ·  183  ·  6  · 

Blackflies suck. Literally. But that's not the point. The point is, I'm now back home from the cottage (with a new collection of itchy lumps) and have access to a computer with an Internet connection again! Which is good, because I had the bright idea to put my in-progress update to There, They're on Google Docs.

It's about 2500 words or so in. So you can probably expect it to be out in the next few days/next week. Depends on what kind of mood I wake up in tomorrow.

Anyway, since I have nothing more interesting to say at this point, I'll just jam in a bit of Calvin and Hobbes wisdom. I'd find some kind of cool pony pic, but I don't feel like searching for one right now.

That shit's deep, man.

FanNotANerd · 14 views

Jumbles of Words I Like

[Tragedy] [Sad]
Applejack returns to Canterlot for the Summer Sun Celebration after 33 years away.
10710
[Dark] [Comedy] [Random] [Alternate Universe]
How do ponies shoot guns if they don't have fingers?
291
[Romance] [Dark] [Comedy] [Slice of Life]
Prince Blueblood and Big McIntosh swap bodies to pursue their respective romantic interests
30815
[Adventure]
Spitfire joins the Corps to escape from her troubles. When trouble finds her, how will she respond?
2133
[Sad] [Random] [Slice of Life]
"My name's Lyra Heartstrings, but you won't remember anything. Listen to my symphony, for it
3732112

Coming Soon to Video and DVD

[Slice of Life]
Sometimes, what makes something so ordinary is what makes it extraordinary.
10
[Adventure]
Princess Celestia takes Twilight to a far away land for a unique educational opportunity: to witness the renewal of treaties that have kept centuries of peace.
10
[Adventure]
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