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BuffaloBrony

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User ID: 15,947
Registered: 25th Feb 2012
Last Seen: 57m, 31s ago
Story views: 3,337

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Well - that didn't work QUITE as I intended · 1:36am

Hello all,

After more than a few delays in the editing process, I have finally completed and posted my indirect prequel to An Old Guardspony's Last Duty.

The new story is "And Pitiless As the Sun.".

My original intent was to describe Celestia having a nightmare in an extremely visceral fashion, without outright stating she was in the first couple of chapters or the story description.

(I personally hate "big reveals" in story descriptions.)

I wanted to try to convey a feeling of horror, despair, and guilt as Celestia's subconscious kept piling things on to get worse and worse. Most of the chapters ending on mild cliffhangers was supposed to help ratchet up tension. I did try to keep subtle clues in the story that it was a dream. (Heck - look at the first line. :twilightsmile: )

Eventually the fact it WAS a nightmare was supposed to be a reveal, with the conversations with the Knight Captain revealing what the "mysterious mission" is that they need one pony for in Old Guardspony.

Reactions were... mixed. I received a number of comments and complaints about the first chapter.

My primary editor getting socked with work right when I handed her the original draft certainly screwed up my timing too...

Oh well - lessons learned.

On to the sequel...

BuffaloBrony · 43 views

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Tr Sa Da

And Pitiless As The Sun

Princess Celestia has a nightmare of her faithful student dying in a horrible attack that destroys most of Ponyville.

What is worse, though - is her response within the nightmare.

This story is an indirect prequel to my other story: An Old Guardspony'sLast Duty.

http://www.fimfiction.net/story/13398/An-Old-Guardspony%E2%80%99s-Last-Duty

I wrote it as a separate story because mixing too much [Dark] into [Normal] stories is frowned upon – and I wanted to describe a nightmare that is vividly bad enough to make Celestia want to do something about it.

~~~~~

Many Thanks to my Moony Maiden - you know who you are! Your editing prowess has made this work at LEAST 20% cooler.

(As always - MLP:FiM belongs to Hasbro. They own the world - I only play in it.)

Picture used under Creative Commons License (http://www.flickr.com/photos/patrickgensel/7003567267/in/photostream/)

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10,005 words ( 4 chapters ) · 682 views ·

33 ·

2 · gore ·

An Old Guardspony’s Last Duty

A young Equestrian Guard recruit is ordered to attend - of all things - the retirement party of a complete stranger.

However, things at the party turn out to be not quite what he expected. As the night progresses, he learns some valuable lessons about himself and just what the duties of being a Guardspony in Her Eternal Princesses' Royal Guards entails.

(A slightly humorous yet slightly bittersweet look at the life and traditions of the Royal Guard)

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7,557 words · 2,655 views ·

129 ·

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GIULIO

#495547 · 4w, 3d ago ·

Thanks for faving The Voice of Reason!

Blue Wolf

#451062 · 7w, 3d ago ·

Thanks for your Favourite tag on On The Dark Side of the Moon.

The final chapter has now been finished and posted, but watch this space for On the Dark Side of the Moon - The Alicorn Alternative, and also a satellite story which will be coming at some point, the working title for which is The Trial of the Cutie Mark Crusaders.

Blue Wolf

Alchemystudent

#422306 · 9w, 5d ago ·

thanks for the fave of her hardest duty

Gabriel LaVedier

#422025 · 9w, 5d ago ·

Thank you for the favorite! And also, I applaud your taste. A buffalo. Ever considered writing about them? There are few enough of them. I tried my best but I have a lot on my plate.

ShadeTail