News story: Antidepressants sometimes actually work.

I've had this itchy thought about doing commissions. My foremost concern has always been, "But Cola, any time people pay you for things, you freak out about it and can't enjoy it any more! How will this be different?"

Answer: Hell if I know! But I love writing almost as much as eating, breathing, or sex. Maybe more, really. So if money can destroy this for me, I genuinely need therapy about this problem I have taking money for work.

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So, long story short.

I had a psych incident. I think I can safely say that if my concept of inpatient psychiatric care was not horrifying, I'd have taken my Mom's advice and checked myself in for a few days. My suicidal ideation cranked up to eleven, then broke its own knob off turning to fifty.

I don't want to do the morbid details, but trust me when I say I've had some really terrible psych events in the past, and I believe this was worse.

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Just in case you don't catch it in your faves, I figured I'd point it out here. (Plus I'm proud of getting back to this story in some fashion, dammit.)

There's a new chapter of Shame and Desire up: Uncontrollable

Yours truly got to be the leading mare in Coils Of Ecstasy, where a plant alters my mind and then takes what it wants from me.

What does it want? What are its motives?

Go read! Perv. :P

Okay. I'm going to focus on the positive first, then put my wailing whines in the smallest text I can.

Obviously: SPOILERS.

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Putting it on.

So help me, Celestia, I really don't want to have to decide this is where I part ways with the canon.

No, I haven't even seen the finale yet (TiVo issue, don't ask), but . . . I honestly don't want to.

I don't think this is a Twilacorn all over again. Really. I'm not claiming that Hasbro is participating in the holocaust retroactively or whatever the frothy-mouthed bronies were saying back when Twilacorn was a twinkle in the internet's eye.

I don't want major changes. I like how the show is now. I could coast on this dynamic a whole 'nother year.

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I . . .

I'm not sure how to say this.

takes a deep breath

I submitted . . .

Hang on.

takes another

I submitted a story to EqD.

I did say 'mistakes', plural. I submitted How Ponyville Was Made, which you'll all remember as -- wait, you won't. Almost nobody read it.

Well, we'll see how things go. For now, I'm just going to try to forget, so I'm not thinking about it often.