2079158
Very good! I'll have to bow out at the moment, as I'm in over my head with the things, but I expect that you'll go far on the site like that.

2075881

Clever.

A pair of spark plugs walk into a bar. The bartender looks at them for a moment, then says, "I'll serve you, just don't start anything."

2075780
Most exquisite. A rejoinder, if I may:

A biologist, a chemist, and a statistician are out hunting on bright, cold morning when they spot a deer making its way across the misty glen.

The biologist lifts his rifle and takes a shot at the deer... and misses five feet to the left.

The chemist quickly takes takes a shot... but misses five feet to the right.

The statistician yells "We got 'em!”

2074932

Impressive, but he about this:

A man walks into a bar with a slap of asphalt under his arm. He says to the bartender, "I'll have a beer, and one for the road."

2074661
Here's a literature/grammar one to add to your repertoire:

"Did you hear about the time that the Present, the Past, and the Future got into a Mexican Standoff?"

"It was tense."