*Hits blunt* Lobsters are like mermaids for scorpions. *Wheeze* Cookie dough is the sushi of desserts. *Hits blunt again* Surely, if tomatoes are a fruit, then that makes ketchup a jam.
You want to know how to write a good story? You take a group of interesting, likable, wonderful characters, and you turn their lives into Hell on Earth. -- Chris Claremont
'Oh, it's you. it's been a looooooong time. you know, since you Murdered me' oh look, cake...