First off, this whole interview was done on Skype with Purple Blaze, the guy behind Peter Krużel. He answered every question himself.
Interview with Peter Krużel
Welcome everypony to the third episode of 'The dirty truth!'. I'm your announcer, Little Mic.
Today, we're going to be interviewing that lucky guy, Peter Krużel.
Our interview will be asking him a series of questions, all sent in by you, the viewers.
Vestal, you may now begin.
Attention now shift's over to Vestal
I do that signature wave that everypony loves and looks straight at Peter, "Well, how you doing today Peter?"
Peter looks at me, "Not bad, dude, but I was busy a while before, you know my job." He says with a smirk.
Job? I didn't know he had a job.
I smile and pick up the list of questions, "Ummm, those are some interesting questions. You ready to begin?"
Peter shrugged, "Yeah, but ask fast, I still have some... work... to do."
I sigh and look at the first question, "First question: What was it like getting sent to another dimension?"
Peter scratched his head, and looks at me, "Well, you know, when it happens, you feel like you're in jelly... A big pool of jelly!"
A big pool of jelly, sounds fun. "Was it fun?"
He laughs awkwardly, "Well... Yes?"
I laugh at his awkwardness, "Alrighty then, next question: What is your favorite hobby?"
Peter looks at me, "Seriously? Isn't it obvious? It's playing on the guitar, duh!"
I smile, "You can play? That's interesting, would you mind playing at the end of the show?"
He smiled brightly, "Of course, dude! But I'll play only one song, because I don't have much time"
I nodded happily, "Sweet! Lets move on: What is your favorite story?"
He rubbed his neck, "Uh... Fan-Fiction or book? If Fan-Fiction, it's Past Sins, and if book, it's Witcher saga."
Never heard of them before, "Cool. What is your favorite dessert?"
Peter inhales deeply, "Well it's..."
I lean forward, "Its?"
"...Pies!" He pulls a apple pie out of nowhere, and throws it straight at me.
The pie slams into my face, exploding into a gooey mess. I sit up, whip the pie off, lick my hoof, and sigh, "Good one." I'll get him back for that one, "Moving on: You ripped Lace tuxedo, on a 1 to 10 meter how mad is he?"
Peter instantly stops laughing, and looks at me in horror, "Oh crap, he didn't know that... Answering the question, it would be 10."
"YOU WHAT!" Somepony out in the crowd screamed.
Peter looks at the audience sheepishly, "Lance! I can explain! That wasn't... ah, screw it, I can't explain it."
"YOUR DEAD WHEN WE GET HOME!" Lance screamed out in the crowd.
I looked out into the crowd and yelled, "Quit! We're in the middle of a show!" I looked back at Peter, "Your screwed."
He looked back, "Well, no shit Sherlock. Let's move on... Hey wait, I live alone!" A big smile appear on his face. "I wonder how Lance will get through my all traps."
I chuckled, poor Lance, "What was it like meeting Lance?"
"The first time?" He burst into laughter, "That mask was great, Lance!"
"THAT WAS YOU!" Lance yelled from the crowd.
I looked out into the crowd and straight at Lance, "LANCE! If you don't stop interrupting, I'll have you kicked out." I looked back to Peter, "Moving on: What in the hell happened to all the dogs that your friends owned?"
"What can I say, they were pretty tasty..." His face was emotionless.
He ate them! "What?!"
He tried to keep his face straight, but failed, and chuckled, "Dude, you should look at your face! No, I didn't do anything to them. I didn't even know that my friends owned a dogs!"
I exhaled, thank Celestia. "You had me there. Lets move on: How many times have you kicked your freinds in the balls?"
"Well, just once. Sorry Zorrow!"
Poor guy, I hope he can still make foals, "Time for some Rarity questions." Because I'm feeling extra evil today, "Is it true that you and Rarity haven't bucked apples yet?"
He looked at me in confusion, "Rarity and me bucked ap..." Suddenly his expression changed, "Oh... I won't answer that question, and I think I know, who asked it. You're dead to me!"
I laughed, "I'll take that as a no. Why do you like Rarity even though you play with pies too much?"
"Did you hear about phase 'opposites attract'. She's... Wait, why I'm telling you this? Leave my love life alone!" He looks at the audience, "Why you asked that question?"
I smirked, "What would happen if Rarity came in while the FLUTTERSHY unit was in HORNY mode?"
Peter glared at me, "Dude! Not funny! Stop that right now, or I'll summon pie storm!"
Oh buck! I picked up a pencil and scribbled out all the sexual Rarity questions, "Okay, I'm done. Moving on: Has Spike killed you/mauled you severely for being Rarity's colt friend?"
His face turned pale, "Okay, NOW I'm dead... I hope that he's not in the audience."
"HEY PETER! LOOK OVER HERE!" Lance said from the crowd as he stood up and held Spike above his head.
Spike pointed at Peter and made a cutting motion with his claw across his throat.
Peter only stared at him for the moment. Then, he smiled, "I won't escape, if you really want to beat me, Spike, first think about how Rarity would react when she'd find me beaten, or dead, huh?" Then he muttered, "I hope he'll give up, or she'll surely find me dead."
Spike shrugged and Lance sat back down.
I chuckled, "I'll allow that interruption. Why do you think that Rarity loves you?"
Peter though for a moment. "Honestly? I don't really know... Sure, I'm a nice person, I would help anypony in need, but... I don't know."
I shrugged, "Its a mystery to all of us. Why did you ask Frederic for bits to buy Rarity the necklace when he could have done it for you?"
He looked sheepishly "Whoops?"
That wasn't a smart move on his part. "Any big plans for April foals day?"
"Yes, I have a REALLY big plans, there will be a prank, that will affect EVERYPONY in Equestria, but, maybe, I'll spare a few..." He smiled evilly.
I better not be affected by his prank. "Why do you like playing guitar?"
"I like it for few reasons. First, it's fun to play! Second, when I had depression, it helped me lighten up. Three, I love to piss off people, who can't play on it." He smirked.
I can't play... "How many songs do know on it?"
"Let's see..." He was thinking for a moment, "Ah, I can't even count! Let's say, MANY"
I grinned, "Cool, can't wait to hear one. Where did you get sent when Greg did his spell?"
Peter looked at me, "His failed mustache spell sent me to another dimension! Fortunetly, somepony helped me."
Another dimension? "when did you discover you were a joki knight?"
He smirked, "In said dimension, and with help of said pony."
"If you had to chose between Rarity or Lance, which one would you want to live?"
After Peter heard the question, he frowned and thought really hard. After a few minutes, he broke the silence "I choose... both. I would sacrifice myself for them."
That's really nice and noble of him. "What possessed you to slam a pie into Rainbow's face?"
He smiled, "The joke force is a strong thing."
I looked at the next question, "Really? This one again? would you kill or seriously harm vestal for a klondike bar and not get in trouble for it?"
He smirked, "Of course!... Not. Klondike bar? Oh please, give me portal gun, and I'll do it."
"What is your favorite song to play?"
He thought for a second, "On an acoustic it's "Change" and on electric it's "Master of Puppets"."
Nice! "I like this one. You are trapped on island for 6 months. Who would you bring with you, why, and what object would you bring for entertainment?"
He smiled and held a hoof to his chin. "For one, I'll bring with me Rarity, because I love her, Lance, Greg, David, because they're my best friends, and Twilight and Rainbow Dash, because David and Lance would kill me, if they wouldn't be with them. For two, I would get full guitar set and drums, hmm... computer with dat internetz and game called Prototype!"
Interesting... "Are you jealous that Lance can do a Shadow Blast and you can't?"
"A little, but I'm a joki knight! So much better!"
I chuckled, "If you are a joki knight, then were do you keep your jokesaber?"
"It's Light Joybuzzer, and it's in my house... don't try to find it, it's hidden perfectly."
A Light Joybuzzer, oh no. "Would you like to play the guitar with Octavia sometime?"
He chuckled, "Maybe..."
Here's a weird question, "What are your thoughts on Twilight, the book."
He rolled his eyes, "I don't read crap, so I don't know what it is..."
"What was it like after the rapture talking to God?"
He laughed, "Think of it like a Big Brother show..."
I looked at the remaining questions, "Do you like roofies?"
"Whatever it is... For now my answer is... Yes." He said grinning.
"What do you think about each brony?"
He shrugged, "Brony is a brony, my buddy!"
I looked at the last question and smiled, "Last question: Why do you like to prank so much?"
He smiled proudly, "Because its fun!"
I stood up and held out a hoof, "It was a pleasure talking to you Peter."
He stood and smirked, "It was a pleasure to talk to you."
When we shook hooves, I felt electricity shot through my body.
Peter began to laugh while I tried not to kill him, "Why don't you play us that song?"
He stopped laughing and smiled, "Sure." He reached down and picked up his guitar.
He then began to play this song.
When he finished, I smiled, "Awesome! Micky, take us away."
Attention is now shifted back over to the announcer
That sure was an interesting episode, huh? Peter sure knows how to pull a prank.
Tune in next time for the next interview. Our next guest something special, he is the luckiest guy around, he is the prince of Equestria, Frederic (No last name given) also know as Iron Clad.
We are ready to start receiving questions for him, so start sending them. Address them to him and him only please.
Thank you all for watching, goodnight everypony!
For fredric question one what did it feel like t turn into a alicorn second how is it being a alicorn third what is it like being married to princess luna
1.Hey, if when you proposed to Luna, and she rejected you, HARSLY, would you either go all suicidal, or go insane?
2.What are ya gonna name your kids?
3.I'm gonnq steal that guys question.......WHAT WOULD YOU DO FOR A KLONDIKE BAR?
4.What are the perks of being king?
to frederic: how did it feel to turn into darksteel edge?
as always "would you kill or cause serrious harm to vestal for ether a klondike bar or a mare proof shelter for 3 for when the mares go into heat also who would you take with you if you chose to get the shelter?" i felt like making it more likley for him to say yess and i still remmember dawn of the mare though i'd do what greg did unless i had a mare freind but that was so funny
Question for Fredric: Who is Darksteel Edge and how did you inhabit him?
187668my question bitch and i already sent it to him via PM so ha
bring as many questions as you want, i am fearless!
COME AT ME BROS!!!
Soo..... Are you and Luna linked spiritually?
if so...
How do you think your fight against your father affected Luna?
Can you read minds? What am I thinking now?
Why didn't you suggest to Peter that you give him a necklace?
When did you look at Luna and say "Yep..She's the one."?
187758 ART THOU HOMOSEXUAL?!
Do u know way a roofie is?
187758already sent in 4 questions including my signiture klondike bar one but with a slight twist i could ask more if you want but how embarising we talkin? as inh dick size or your most favorite fanasy cause i'll ask if you dont say anything
Ok. If my metal wings were ever destroyed, could you fix them, if so, how? If not, why?
187750
I sent him the question BEFORE I read it so HAH BITCH!!!!
188076well your logic be flawed for i told him i would ask the exact same question every interview so the momment he posted it or even thought about it i had already teckhnikly asked him i just repeated the question with a slight twist this time but the original one was already asked
188118and yes im a human male at least until i finnaly figure out a way to cross dimension hop and go to equestria i litterly always wass curos about multidemensions and there possiabiltys but now i gotta add go to equestria to the list if i find a way to get payed to figure it out
A ROOFIE IS A DRINK GIVEN TO PEOPLE SO THEY FALL ASLEEP AND RAPISTS CAN RAPE THEM. SO do you like roofies?
1. Hmm to Frederic what is royal life like opposed to the life you lived before as a blacksmith?
2. Frederic have you and Luna thought of having children?
3. Do you still ever work on making armor?.......also what would you do for a Klondike bar?
188447already asked the klondike bar one 3 times and im the original asker so you dont nead to ask i ask everytime
188163 IKR!!! i just went outside with my sis to look at it 30 seconds ago.
187826 i do. its a date-rape drug. I know its wrong to put this here but...
188361 i will NEVER love roofies. you can even interview me on here.
*Cocks M24* There's a reason I asked that.
188361 YOU MUTHERFFUCKER!
That was MY quiestion!
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
i3.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/000/107/awesome-face.png
Oh Strudel...
you only did manage to answer a couple of questions though...
Well, anyways...
1. Do you like Roofies?
2. Explain your love for Luna in the Gravitic Equation: i.ajdesigner.com/gravity/newtons_law_gravity_equation_force.png
3. Are you 1337 like Mas3r C33F?
4. What would happen if Luna got trapped in a room with the FLUTTERSHY unit on HORNY mode?
190302cause you be insane
I've got one:
When did you first discover Darksteel Edge?
Frederic... How's the Moon tonight?
Q: Are you a sexy little weasel
where would you build your bunker what upgrades would it have and what speacial deffenses would it have 2. on a scale of one to RAAAAGGGGGEEEE how pissed off would you be if greg messed up one of your spells accdently making everypony in a 20 mile radius switch their gender
roffies are drugs im pretty sure
haha I am now posting more questions
1. wouldn't other unicorns and alicorns be able to teleport and locate the bunker?
2. How would you react if you were sent to a alternetdimension where Luna had a child that died during birth and somehow appeared alive 12 years later age 12?
3.How angry would you be at Greg if he planted secret video cameras in yours and Luna's room?
4. How angry were you when Greg interrupted your wedding? And if you weren't angry what was your reaction?
5. How angry would you be if human's made a portal to Equestria and kidnapped your wife?
6.How angry are you at these questions?
7.Would you hurt Vestal extremely to experience the best part of your life again? (like in a first person memory spell that could only be done by hurting Vestal)
8.How strange do you find these questions?
9. What's the best experience you've had in your life that didn't involve Luna?
10. What's the worst thing you've said about Luna behind her back?
and I think that's all my questions
197871 Why do you say that? Someone give you information? WHO DID IT?! ... Uh... why did I say that?
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NbKkWuNhWkvLs/Ql/Q9e42G2ytTsaavNmmMsguyEA23Oee1B6BmUHNoLsczzgPldyLCLi4u4jiG7vGVOu7G8YGUshPeanOqlLjiG1puOpYvscxsOYQVbpfVaSnBPbNGZIGYHSOpQbXg7LH43K5KiMPBaAXHo3d87lSOv2jXUNVeMjBJc23Nd94DozBQQevYyj8JL+zRJQTNrVUY4YXcXy/s0aWUAhCEAhCEEnqz9spvDw+21WNo25hiz/tst/qFXOrP2ym8PD7bVY+i/6MX6GX/1CDoY3d0LK27yLImxPBa3ThB4AbrIx3C9Y4FeyA5/FkGkj0LLHv3L1rPRZe4OKDmaSXK3dR9ENp6RrwLPl5xPR90d62fjVSNZzsjwV16GeH0cBGzA0eSwPqKDeL7d4+CsXb7b/jrWxwFuFli0dHD4KDh0rRtfGWnnZG99hvtH8L5z04x9DVyRtJwA3aD+A5tHkK+lqw2a6/BfOHZNmBrngfdbGD38N/5QSGjq8SAH4zV16r6cFTTMz+sjAY4d7Y7vEfyvm/VuvLXW6VYOjNLPicJIzhPoI3gjeguC27puf4Q45eXyJIZ2RrNu+N3fZZ3oJuFD6X7MULQQ1srjww4PKTdA4a0acZBC97zzWC56TuaOklfNmkqsySOedr3Oce+TdSmtGuc1Y4Y7NYL4WN2A8TvJ6VEUtIXkZGyCQ0NCQQdyvvsVuHyOYDbygv3sIt/KqbR9CA0DfZOOo+nBTTFkptFKACRlY/dJ9I8aCy3S52ALjwHxkiOIdq87bkAbL7xf05LZcW5tg3o+M1hIy4uNozHfCDK+VhkOAVT9mYDDHx5Q+zn/AArTq6prWY+N8uneFQPZJ1lFTUWYbsjuL8XHtiOjYPEgX9PfZoP1zftUiX1P6cP/AHWn/XL+1SKAQCEIQCEIQSerP2ym8PD7bVY2jH2hjy/ts9LQq51Z+2U3h4fbarDoj9REOLGeyEG8ML00aqajOqQHvOCLjbNx/wAb+tROgKDlpmR589wHi3+hXUyEMa1jBZrQAB0BBAwalUUQsIg48XEuJ/hcek9SYHAmNuA9BNvIUyvG3pt/yvXb/FZBSGnIzSy4JBYntTucOjvbwtMc4OzPgnrsn6AFRSvy5zQXsO8PaL5d8AjyKiNE6wvjIDjcILBDLhOuomsgjHyeV1mk3Y4nYTtaeFzsVfUtbiaHX3Le6fPxILxcQd4WDpAMyQMrFVFBrHURtsyXvBwxC3RfO3jUTpvXfSAFmiK34g0n0E2QWRrnrlHTxF7iD+Ft83u3AdHEr5v0rpB0sj5HG7nuLj3yt+k6momfilL3u4n1DgtdJoZ79oNr5oN+r8JxXTzTG1huURo7RoYNltm5S8aDdJNa/wAeJcNZTMkGbQuuXp2cVrLbD48iCIk1eZfILpp9Hhtsl2WA3r1jrWQe4csjmvTJt45H44LF7rBeNIPx8XQMGitb5YQG9u0bA47OgHcuis7KZYD/AN3lPecwjy7UsB99ixJBy3FBG6y9kuoqGmMDkYze4BJc6/F3Uk6znm1inifRsbs7DesItFNHx60C7rBHhpoBwfL+1RpeTZrs0BkYH5kv7NElNAIQhAIQhBJ6s/bKbw8P7jU/UVUwRRhzrOa1osQciAAQctqq9rrG4yIXb8+1H583nH9aC5NT9OwxVUTpJGtaCbk5AXBGfDarMk12oSftcH+4Xyf8+1H583nH9aPn2o/Pm84/rQfVztd6HuqH/cLB+u9F3VD/ALhfKnz7Ufnzecf1pxptHtOjBXyV1a1vL/JyxoDjjwY8QcZm823Re/lQXHrFrhSOjIbURvOZs03Ow5WXzVJRSXyjf/q7qTVp/Q88VHDXU9bNPTSuMZLi+OSOQX5j2B7h905hxHlF1b58qPz5vOP60DToKqIaA/E3Le13Uplta2/bePPqUFPSSUsMUtbVVLXzt5SKCN5x8kcmySPc60YdnhFnE2OxY1NHNJSPq6OqqJIonNbPG97hJDi7RxwuIfGTcYhY3GbRtQMQrWfi9fUvPlrOI71j1Ku/n2o/Pm84/rTNV0klJFE+uqqoSTMEjII3nG2I9q+V73WjLrGzQ1xsM8OxBKSPiJvl5D1LLHGMwdu3I9Shq2jmdSGspKqolhY4Mma9zmyQOd2uLC4hzHbA8WzyICX4tOz3GKefDvtI69ui5QPYqWfi38D1LJ1YzPP0HqXHrLo6OiMAfX17/lFPFUNwtbkyTFZpvP2wt3s0vadrzG5nyatqJo3xtfdznMc1xLg5jmh7gCC3jne+xA3mvaRt2dB6li6tbxHkPUorVCgdWQ1Uj62qjdSwumcGkuD2tvkCZBhds4jNK0mnZ7nDPPbdeR17dNigfBVsvt9BWDaxnT5D1LlGj2jRsde+urQ18xgMbQCQ8NLr4jMLtsOG9Q9fXt+TmSCtq3SCRjDHLzea5shxtc2V17FgBFh2wQMTqtt9voPUvBVt4+g9SVNBSVlXURU8U8uOV4Y28r7C+857ALk95MFFFBJWNpPl9dG4yiITuF2Odiw/0+UDo2k5Aku2i4Gdg6/lbeO7gVk2oYRme9kUjTaZqGucOXmyJH9R+499YfPtR+fN5x/WgezUs4+g9SyFWzj6D1JC+faj8+bzj+tHz7Ufnzecf1oJ7XU3jiIzBklsc8/qqMG1+kEeJKa3VNY+QgyPe8jZicXW8pWlAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAKytERwu1bAqXyMjOkxd0bGvI+obnhc5uVr7M9mSrVNo1qp/mr5v5Ka/L/KOVxs7fBgw4MPa4f8AK98+hBNdk6V1JBBo6BgFELVEc2LGaovB+sLgAG2xEYRsyzOSr2mtjbi7W4xd6+foTNQ65Ru0eaGshfMxj8dPIx4a+Am+NoxNcHMJzw5b+gtVn2ubXtuvttuugsPs8g/Ozvw8jDgtswYTs6MWJbOxA4cjpbH/AEvkMmPhezsPj7ayXZ9ao6qCGKuY9z4G8nFPGW4+SGyORjhaQDcbtIz23Wqq1naylfSUjHRRSua6Z73B0kxb2jThAayNpzDRfPMuKCH0Xg5eLlO05RmP9OIYvRdO3Z0Dvnme+zBBh/TybNn/ALsSr9NFXrVHWRRMrmSGWBgjZURFuN0QzayVjxZ+G5s4OaczfFtQMPYqcPkGmsf9P5HnfZjtLyfjveyrYphrtZ2ilNHSMdFC9wfM5zg6Sdze0xloAaxu0MA25kkqBitcYr4d9rX8V0Fpa/z0bXaL+VxVEn/h9GbxTRsGDnXBa6JxJ2/eG7ZtVa6WewzymO2AySFthYYcRw2G4Wsp/XbWqGuFPycUsTqeCOnGJ7XhzI74XGzWkOzN92zYlVA/9jD7Npf/ANBKkEpq1P1rgo4apkkUsjqqF0JLXtaGNdfMAtOI7OGxK8lrnDe26+23TZBYrHxDVqHl2yOb8vksI3tYb8k7aXMcLWvuSfpyWmMcHyVr2kB/KCRzXOx4sjia1oLcNrZbiptutlIdGx0D4aghkxn5RssYJeWltsJjNm2PG9x4lFVWk6RtO+OmhmEkhYHSSyMfaNpxFjGsjbhLnBhLiTk22Vygj9CV8sFRHLT35WNwe2wvm3M3G8WBuOF1ZsD9G6eeNujtJuNwW5wzSbb9DyRfc652vKrfVvSwpaqKdzOUEbsRZe2MWPNJsbA7NiltHaaoYKhlTHBUYo3iSOF0rCwPacTLyhge5gIBthBNrYt6CB0to+SCeWKXKSN72Pzvzmkg578965F1aU0k+omkmlN3yvc9x2c5xJNhuGexcqAQhCAQhCAQhCAQhCAQhCAQhCDp0a5omjMlsAezFcXGHEMVxvFrp30qzRUjnF0gaQGD6luEW5Sa7gGxtY52DkhYNGVtrsTlX6EDrDo/RhDscrWnGLBj5nAC8QtidELt50jr2uMFs9+UOjtFczFMbg2dYyEPPI32lgwM5UAcedt24UhCBs0VBo2x5Zz/AOs8NONwPI8rStYTaO1+TfUvJyziGQ2Hpp6PROGLFJISWxiQ4nNsXOiEjrBhzYDMQNhDG5H7yUhA6UtHoo2L5HNBdCXNDn3bdtMZGNPJkFoLqkYjmDGzaDzuX5PSRmFxBbytPVPe1/PwOMU0cAGWZMjRIDuxs2WulVCB2loNE3faV1hyZacUmY5WQOA+quHOiERJIIa5zuafu6qSl0dy8rHyXh5WHAecOaYagvzwl1mymIEYhi47HBOQgdqZ+jY5I2gMla7mSOk5S1uSgeJBZodH9dyjDa/NBy3nl1cioBFjqHt5UOfZpDyLc1oBbhIIIc5173uwd5KaEDsyi0TjjIldhNy8OMgtk1+EFrNoEuC/4qRxzxtB11OidHsjdeRzXugdJGXFx5wLmMGENzxmMSAm1m1DcjYlqahA2UMVAz5E9zw5wmhNQ0h5HJEgyYmllubYts29wdhyK649H6K+9MRzob4TIbZ0wlaCY+cznVBDrXHJjb95IQgeaOo0cKh+NsJYPkGH+phs2JraoN5vOJec8QzsSL7/ACOl0W9rG4yHOa0WxFuB7o6h7gXGPnASiFl3Xyd4wjoQM2vehoqecMhwtaBYNxlznZu57szhvsAJBIaDYAglZQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhAIQhB/9k=