Act II:
“The Journey Begins”
Chapter Seven:
"Arrival at the Camp"
“Welcome home!” Twilight announced proudly as she swung the door open to the special camp barracks, revealing a very empty and stark room that was furnished with only a single bunk bed, a nightstand and single window to provide light. “I know it’s a bit of a fixer-upper,” she continued, the first half of her sentence preceded immediately by the crashing of a ceiling tile. “But I’m pretty sure you’ll do just fine, Ms. Applejack. You seem to be of the resourceful type.”
“What about me?” Surprise butted in from behind Applejack, bearing a slightly disappointed look on her face. “Don’t I get a bunk?” she asked, and Twilight nodded.
“Yes,” Twilight replied, taking out her clipboard and pen. “But yours will be on the other side of the camp, in barracks… A-2, I think,” she said, nodding in apparent satisfaction as she looked down once more at her papers, content that she was correct. “But again, I’m sure you'll be fine. You seem like you make friends easily enough, after all.”
“Yeah, okay,” the blonde mare looked down to the floor. “It’s just I was really hoping I could bunk with my new best friend, Applejack.
“Well I’m sorry, Mrs. Pie.” Twilight gave Surprise her best attempt at an apologetic smile. “But I’m sure you two will have plenty of time to become BFF’s over the next couple of weeks.”
Applejack put a hoof on Surprise’s shoulder, pulling her now down friend closer. “Hey now, lil’ lady, don’t be so glum. I’m sure yer gonna meet somepony nice over there,” she said, noticing how downbeat Surprise seemed to have become. “I’ll be just fine, alright, Surgarcube?”
Surprise noded. “Okay,” she raised her head slightly with a forced smile. “I guess I’ll be going then. Good luck AJ.” She gave Applejack a hug and turned to walk out of the room, followed by Twilight.
“Ms. Apple, I told them about your condition,” Twilight said over her shoulder. “I had them leave some cigarettes. Bottom drawer right there.” She motioned towards a foot locker at the foot of a bunk bed clear on the other side of the room. “You and whomever they choose to have bunk with you will be splitting it. Is that alright with you?”
Applejack nodded. “Thank ya, ma’am. I appreciate it.”
Twilight gave her a smile, and nodded, before turning to head after Surprise. “Alrighty then. Mrs. Surprise? I’ll show you to your bunk then,” she called out, leaving Applejack alone in the room with her steamer trunk.
Applejack let out a slight sigh, before taking a breath and starting to push the large steamer trunk towards the bed. She only managed to push it a few inches before stopping to take a breather, as her spindly frame could barely muster the strength necessary. Not to mention that, being asthmatic, heavy labor was always prone to cause her to lose her breath quickly.
“What in tarnation is makin’ this so garsh darn heavy?” she wondered aloud, before leaning against it, which, surprisingly, caused it to fall over to it’s side with a loud thump creating an impact upon the hard, linoleum floors of the barracks. The green eyes of the new recruit widened as she heard the muffled sound of someone groaning in pain.
What the hay? she thought, raising an intrigued eyebrow, quickly walking around the trunk and fishing the key out of her hat, kept in a closely knit pocket near the very top of the curve of the classic stetson design of the head piece. She turned the key and lifted the lid, only to have her mouth drop open in shock.
“Apple Bloom?!” she gasped, barely able to comprehend the sight of the small, off yellow filly crammed into the steamer trunk, gasping for air as if she’d just come up from swimming.
“OH THANK CELESTIA!” Apple Bloom gasped as she practically threw herself out of the trunk and staggered to the bed, flopping down and taking long, deep breaths. “I could’a sworn I was gonna die in there! Applejack, y’all would not believe how hot it got in there! I mean, it was so hot, tight and I think a few bugs got in there somewhere along the way!”
“But...how’d ya even breathe in there?” Applejack stammered, still trying to wrap her head around the bizarre situation.
“I used tha keyhole!” Apple Bloom replied, still obviously gasping for breathe.
Applejack narrowed her eyes, not buying her little sister’s assertion for a second. “Keyholes don’t work like that, ‘Bloom.” she said, before facepalming. “You know better than that, Bloom. I want the truth,” she folded her arms, lowering her brow deeply. “Now.”
Apple Bloom rolled onto her side, her face one of frustration. “Oh fine. I stowed away in tha trunk, an’ then when they dropped it in tha back of tha train, I popped it open wit’ mah hairclip.” she held up the twisted piece of metal in her hand before continuing. “An’ then, I just kinda waited till we got ta da station, then hid back in tha trunk, and did tha same thin’ on the zeppelin’, where it was really cold, and then we got here.” She finished with her best innocent smile.
Applejack blinked. “But how’d ya figure that all out?!” she asked, still in shock. Apple Bloom shrugged.
“I read it in those books ‘bout Hoofdini I got from tha library,” she replied, standing up and fixing her bow in an obvious effort to avoid Applejack’s glare.
“But that still don’t explain why ya did it ‘Bloom! That was dangerous! Ya coulda got killed!”
Apple Bloom hung her head in shame. “I--I just wanted a cutie mark...that’s all.”
“All this fer a cutie mark?! You have got to be kiddin’ me!” Applejack said, sitting down next to Apple Bloom. “I keep tellin’ ya it will happen when it happens, but here you are, sneakin’ away to boot camp and some super secret military… thingy!” She took a deep breath, palm on her chest as her lungs once more tightened. After a quiet moment of Applejack regaining her breath, she continued. “I mean, why would ya think it’s worth dyin’ over?”
“So those mean ponies at school stop pickin’ on me…” Apple Bloom said sadly, idly rubbing her hooves together.
Applejack’s expression softened some, though not quite all the way. “Whadda mean? What do they do?” she asked, her anger at her sister now directed towards the bullies, whomever they were.
“They call me a blank flanked dirt digger. They throw stuff at me...they’re constantly laughin’ at me, sayin’ I’m stupid...sayin’ I shouldn’t even be in school...stuff like that,” Apple Bloom replied quietly, leaning against Applejack with watery eyes. “An’ it don’t help either that I can’t really help ya and Purity at tha farm...I mean, ya’ll both work so hard, I had to feel like I was helpin’ ya somehow.”
Applejack gently pulled Apple Bloom into a hug. “Oh, ‘Bloom, we didn’t want to wear you out with work when you already had school and all. We were hopin’ school would make sure you didn’t have to work like us. Yer cutie mark is gonna come, ya’ll just gotta be patient, ‘Bloom. Ya can’t just make it appear like magic.”
Apple Bloom let out a sad sigh. “But I’m fourteen AJ! Everypony else in mah class is got one, hay, everypony in the school has one! An’ I’m just sittin’ there, tryin’ so hard ta find one, doin’ anythin’ I can, an’ nothing works! What’s so bad ‘bout me tryin’ somethin’ else?”
“‘Bloom, ya’ll gotta understand, a cutie mark is an epiphany. It’s somethin’ that only happens when ya discover what ya love. And, once ya find that out, yer gonna find yer purpose. Now, ya’s gotta have somethin’ ya like ta do a lot. What is it?”
Apple Bloom sighed. “I like fixin’ thin’s I guess. But Purity always gets mad when I try ta help her fixin’ tha farm equipment stuff.”
Applejack gave Apple Bloom a smile. “Oh, that’s just because Purity doesn’t want ya ta get hurt by accident. She’d rather have ya studyin’ fer school. That way, ya can get a nice, well payin’ job. So, how ‘bout, instead of tryin’ ta help with farm equipment, ya try ta fix somethin’ a little...smaller.”
“Like what?” Apple Bloom asked, looking up at Applejack. Applejack was about to answer when a knock came at the door. Applejack was quick to hush Apple Bloom.
"Hold on, just don't say nothin', an' we'll talk later, 'kay?"
"But AJ--"
"No buts. Shhh." Applejack replied, walking over to the door, opening it to reveal a tall white stallion.
"Oh, hi Shinin'! How ya doin?" Applejack asked, consciously placing herself so that she could hide Apple Bloom from Shining's field of vision. The last thing she needed was for Shining to see Apple Bloom and then totally freak out, possibly calling all sorts of security down on Applejack and then any hope for Applejack getting to be able to get that money the family needed would be lost.
Shining however, simply gave Applejack a smile. "Oh, I'm just doing fine. I take it Twili and you have met?"
"Twili? Ya mean that lavender mare? Un, yeah we met." Applejack answered, rubbing the back of her neck. "Why? Is she yer girlfriend or somethin'?" sh asked, wondering how Shining had come to know the purple unicorn. Shining's face however, was quick to contort into an expression of bafflement, quickly followed by him shaking his head.
"What?!” His eyes went wide, as if he had just seen or heard something really disgusting. “No! No! Just… NO! she's not my girlfriend! She's my sister!" he proclaimed. Applejack blushed furiously.
"Oh...um, I’m sorry, ya just didn't mention her." she gave Shining her best apologetic smile, unable to look the stallion directly in the eye and rubbing the back of her neck in a nervous response..
"It’s… okay, it’s okay, but," Shining said, giving an equally awkward smile in return. “That’s kinda...gross.” There was a painfully awkward pause between the two of them, with each rubbing the back of their respective necks awkwardly.
"Sooo....how do you like your cabin?" Shining finally asked, seemingly dead set on changing the topic of discussion. "Because I brought you some, um, books and stuff."
"Oh, its good, its good. An' what kinda books?" Applejack asked, her eyes looking towards the saddle bags on Shining's back. Shining's horn lit up and he pulled out what looked like a thick textbook.
"Um, its just some military books. Figured it wouldn't hurt to at least help you on the written test." he explained, and Applejack took the book, nodding her head.
"I didn't know they'd be a test, but thank ya kindly Mistah Armor." She moved to put the book on her back however, she unconsciously allowed the door to swing open, revealing Apple Bloom, who was sitting on the bunk with a frustrated expression.
“It’s not problem at all, Applejack. Anything for a frie-” his eyes narrowed as they affixed themselves on Apple Bloom. “Applejack...what is your sister doing here?"
"Well--"
"I wanna join tha Army Mistah Armor!" Apple Bloom proclaimed, cutting Applejack off mid sentence. "So I can get mah cutie mark!"
"Really? You haven't gotten one yet? How old are you, exactly? Because I swear I had mine at your-" he was cut off by a warning glare from Applejack. He gave Applejack an apprehensive and apologetic smile, before leaning down to be at eye level with Apple Bloom. “So you don’t have your mark, then?”
Apple Bloom shook her head. "No I haven't but I really, really want one!" she said. "An' I'd do anythin' ta get it!"
"Now hold on, 'Bloom! Didn't we just talk 'bout this?" Applejack said, stepping up in front of Apple Bloom. "Ya gotta find what ya love first, then do that." Shining however, held up a hoof.
"Now hold on, Applejack,” he began to rub his chin, looking Apple Bloom over and squinting his eyes. “Sometimes a pony needs to do a little digging, anyways, you can't blame the filly for being eager, I mean, I knew I was desperate for one when I was her age."
“So yer sayin’ yer gonna help me get one?” Apple Bloom asked, her expression hopeful. Before Applejack had a chance to protest, Shining Armor nodded. “For realsies?!” Apple Bloom gasped, her eyes widening to the size of saucers.
“Yeah, I don’t see why not,” He said, looking towards Applejack.
"But, Shinin', yer not gonna let a little filly just up an' wander 'round a military base! She's gotta go home! Purity's gonna be worried sick!" Applejack countered, waving a hoof for emphasis.
"Don't worry Applejack," Shining said, walking up to Applejack. He motioned for her to come closer. "I'm just going to walk her around the base, and keep her occupied, that way I can keep an eye on her until I can think of a way to get her home safely. That way she doesn't get into trouble." he said quietly, glancing towards Apple Bloom as he spoke.
Applejack bit her lip slightly. “Ya sure?” she whispered, and Shining nodded again.
"Of course. Just relax, and I'll handle it. No need to worry." He said confidently, and Applejack sighed.
"Alrighty then, just remember, she can be a bit of a handfull, 'kay?" She then turned to Apple Bloom, who had taken it upon herself to start leafing through the textbooks Shining had brought. "'Bloom, Shinin's gonna show ya base, 'kay?"
"So he’s really gonna help me get a cutie mark?!" Apple Bloom asked excitedly, and Applejack and Shining nodded in unison.
"Yup! Come on now, let me show you around," Shining said, motioning for Apple Bloom to follow him. Apple Bloom, grinning widely at the hope of a cutie mark, bounded after Shining happily. Applejack leaned out the doorway as they walked off, waving towards Apple Bloom.
"Now remember 'Bloom, stay with Mistah Armor an' listen ta what he says alright!"
"Don't worry! I will!" Apple Bloom shouted over her flank as she scampered after the larger stallion.
"An' stay safe!" Applejack added, her expression worrisome.
"I will!" Apple Bloom shouted again, and her and Shining disappeared around the corner of a nearby cabin, leaving Applejack alone. Applejack sighed, turning inside the cabin and closing the door behind her.
Don't worry yerself, AJ, 'Bloom is gonna be fine. Shinin' Armor seems like a nice stallion. Anyways, its not like she's gonna get drafted like me. Jus' focus on tha trainin', an' everythin' will be good. She thought, picking up the spilled contents of the trunk and starting to find places for everything. An extra change of horseshoes were placed in the bottom drawer of the small nightstand, and her cigarettes were placed along side them. She noticed that one of the packets was open. She briefly wondered how the pack had been opened, and if Apple Bloom had tried to use of the cigarettes, but a quick glance inside revealed that all were accounted for.
Might as well, she thought, pulling out a single cigarette and the Zeppo Lighter. With a quick flick, the cigarette was alight and she took a draw, exhaling the medicated smoke from her nostrils. She coughed slightly, gently tapping her chest with a fist in an attempt to loosen her lungs. Satisfied that she had successfully avoided an asthma attack, she went back on organizing the several trinkets she had packed.
//////////////////////////
"And over here is where your sister and the other trainees are going to train," Shining Armor said, motioning towards what looked like a glorified school playground, with a wide assortments of monkey-bars, climbing structures, ropes and nets, along with a complex series of pits and trenches, which were covered in barbed wire.
"Looks like a big playground," Apple Bloom said, tilting her head in curiosity.
"Yeah, its sorta like a playground, but with more blood, sweat, tears and suffering," Shining said, nodding his head slightly.
Apple Bloom’s eyes widened. “So AJ’s gonna be goin’ inta battle fer real?”
Shining’s eyes widened slightly. “Well..um...no, not exactly...at least, not that I know,” He answered evasively. “I will say that it is definitely possible, but I’ve been wrong before.”
Apple Bloom scrunched up her face again. “But I thought she was gonna be a soldier? Don’t that mean she’s gonna fight in tha war?”
Shining hesitated. Well you've really stepped in it now, Shining, he thought. Go and tell the fourteen year old that her sister might get her head blown off, just like you did with your last girlfriend, and we all know how that turned out. Shining thought as he took a breath and began to chose his words carefully.
"Well, Apple Bloom, not everypony who joins the army has to go fight in the war. Instead, some ponies, like me for instance, stay here and help keep the homes and towns nice and safe and make sure everypony follows the rules and stuff, while others go out and make sure those HYDRA ponies can't hurt little ponies like you." He finished his carefully worded speech and gave a somewhat shy smile, which only caused Apple Bloom to give him a slightly suspicious expression. “And others still run support for those on the front lines, working as messengers, cooks, or just general staff that help the military run like a smoothly operated machine.”
"Ya mean yer not a soldier Mistah Armor? Yer just a cop? Isn't that, I don't know, a little dissapointin' to ya?" she asked, blindsiding Armor with the unexpectedly perceptive question. Shining opened and closed his mouth slightly.
"I mean, its kinda dishonest right? Thats like sayin' yer a farmer, when, really, all ya do is own one an' have other ponies do tha work fer ya," Apple Bloom continued, and Shining shook his head.
"No, no, its not like that. Just,” he took a breath, trying to find the right words. “Just because somepony can't pick up a weapon and fight in the war like a normal soldier, doesn't mean they're dishonest. Sometimes, they just have a job they need to do back here at home, or else everything goes crazy or something else really bad happens. Like, what if all the police ponies left to go to war? They'd leave all the cities and towns without law enforcement, and that would mean that all those nasty thieves and robbers would take over the town. Get it?"
Apple Bloom shrugged slightly. "Yeah I guess I get it...but that still don't answer my first question."
"Well, thats because I don't really know the answer, Apple Bloom. I can’t say for certain if Applejack is going to be sent to the front. This whole thing is really a big test, and Applejack is going to be taking it along with some other ponies, and then, at the end of testing, they're going to pick a winner."
"Really?" Apple Bloom responded. "That means Applejack is gonna win a fancy prize right?"
Shining nibbled his lower lip slightly. “Yeah...I guess you could say it’s sort of like that.” He then leaned down to be on her level and leaned in close. “I already know what the prize is, but I don’t want to spoil the surprise for you, squirt” he said, lifting his eyebrows slightly and smiling, ruffling her mane. Apple Bloom’s expression was one of excitement.
“Really? Ya’s gotta secret?! I can keep a secret!” she said, hopping up and down slightly. Shining shook his head.
“Sorry, but a secret is a secret,” he said, puffing his chest out with confidence. As he did so, he looked around to see a very burly and heavily built unicorn seemingly screaming his head off at a smaller, generally meeker looking colt. The drill sergeant then paused, looking around for a moment, before seemingly noticing Shining.
“ARMOR! GET YOUR WHITE PRIVILEGED RICH BOY FLANK OVER HERE, AND INFORM THIS FILTHY MAGGOT WHY ONE SHOULD ALWAYS MAKE SURE THEY’VE NAILED THEIR HORSESHOES ON PROPERLY!”
Shining huffed, before flicking his eyes towards Apple Bloom and then towards a nearby building. He leaned down towards Apple Bloom.
“Look, I’ve gotta help with that. Trust me when I say I’ll be right back, but in the meantime, go over there and wait for me okay?” he said, pointing towards the building. Apple Bloom looked towards the building, then towards Shining.
“But why? What’s wrong? Why can’t I help out?” she asked, her voice taking on a somewhat whining cadence.
“Well--” Shining was cut off by the drill sergeant shouting again.
“SHINING! I ISSUED YOU AN ORDER! STOP FIDDLING WITH FILLIES AND GET YOUR FLANK OVER HERE THIS INSTANT OR I WILL SHOVE YOUR HEAD UP YOUR PLOT HOLE SO HARD YOU’LL BE TURNED INSIDE OUT!”
Both Apple Bloom and Shining’s faces broke out into looks of fear, with Shining spinning on his hooves and briskly trotting towards the drill sergeant, leaving Apple Bloom alone. He briefly looked over his shoulder and motioned towards the building he had indicated, and Apple Bloom, most certainly not wanting to incur the wrath of what seemed to be a very big and very, very mean looking drill sergeant, quickly nodded and aimed herself towards the building.
As Shining walked off towards the drill sergeant, Apple Bloom walked up to the building, and looked up at the sign at the top of the door.
“‘Gunsmithin’?” She read aloud. She furrowed her brow slightly.
Well...gunsmithin’ has ta do wit’ building...an’ I like buildin’ stuff…. Her eyebrows rose as an idea formed in her mind. Applejack said I should do what I like! An’ if I do what I like, I can get a cutie mark!
“Cutie Mark in Gunsmithin’ yay!” she cheered, reaching for the doorknob and opening the door, which was, surprisingly, unlocked. She stepped inside eagerly, happy that fate seemed to be smiling down on her today. Sitting at a table, hunched over and listening to the music on the radio, was an earth pony who was busily working on a half-assembled rifle.
“Hello mistah!” Apple Bloom said, hopping up on the unoccupied stool next to the stallion. The stallion glanced towards her for a moment, before grunting.
“Whadda want?” He grumbled, taking a draw from his cigarette and exhaling the smoke from his nostrils.
Apple Bloom gave her best confident smile. “I wanna try an’ see if gunsmithin’ is gonna be mah cutie mark!”
The stallion looked at Apple Bloom with an intensely disinterested expression, before his eyes drifted towards Apple Bloom’s flank. “I see you’re a blank flank,” he droned and Apple Bloom nodded self-awarely.
“Um...yeah, yeah I am,” she said. “But I really wanna try everythin’ I can ta get mah cutie mark! So can I help ya?”
The stallion smiled slightly. “Well, thanks for info.” He then shrugged. “As long as you stop talking and just hand me my tools, then sure.”
Apple Bloom nodded, and the stallion motioned towards the small mallet sitting on the table.
“Alright then, pass me that mallet.”
Apple Bloom was quick to reach over and place the mallet in the stallion’s hoof. He took it in hoof, and once more returned to the disassembled gun. As he worked, Apple Bloom watched intently, her eyes focusing on the mechanics of the weapon. Something about it seemed almost poetic and elegant the various pieces fitting together gracefully.
“Um, Mistah, can I give it a try?” she found herself asking, and the stallion glanced towards her.
“Pleeeeeaaaaase?” she asked again, making the best puppy dog face she could muster.
The stallion sighed. “Ugh, fine, whatever. Just as long as you stop making that face.” He slid a disassembled gun towards Apple Bloom and motioned towards the parts.
“Okay, go. Let’s see what ya got.” he said, and Apple Bloom nodded, reaching for the parts and beginning to assemble the rifle. For some reason, it seemed really easy for her, with the pieces just clicking into place smoothly and quickly.
“There!” she said proudly, plopping the now full assembled gun on the tabletop and smiling broadly. The stallion stared at the assembled gun in complete shock.
“...did you just assemble that?” he said, and Apple Bloom nodded.
“Yeah, yeah I did.” she said, arching an eyebrow slightly. “Why? Did I do somethin’ wrong?”
“What? No! No not at all! It’s just, you did it perfectly,” the stallion said, shaking his head in wonderment. He was quick to slide some more parts over to her, beckoning for her to continue.
“Go, do it again!” he said, and Apple Bloom shrugged.
“Um, okay...I just don’t get why this is such a big deal is all,” she replied, before moving on to assemble the next gun. Within moments she was done, and the stallion, grinning broadly, beckoning for some other stallions, all of whom had been working on their own stuff, to come over and watch.
//////////////////////////
Shining grumbled to himself as he headed back towards the gunsmith shop. What should have been a quick chiding of a lazy soldier and an attempt to calm the ever-fiery General Stonewall down, was soon distended by way Stonewall’s ranting on the way Shining Armor cut his mane, and how he supposedly looked like ‘a strange, emaciated skank rat that had drowned itself in a bucket of paint.’
Let me just pick up Apple Bloom, and then figure out a way for her to go home nice and safe like I promised. he thought, coming to a stop however, when he saw a large crowd of ponies all gathered around the gunsmith shop.
Oh dammit, he thought worriedly, speeding up his pace and pushing his way through the gaggle of ponies. Apple Bloom please tell me you didn't do something stupid please please plea--
His thoughts derailed when he finally reached where Apple Bloom, who sat surrounded by servicemen, all chanting her on while she assembled a Browning Automatic Rifle at seemingly lightning speed. With a loud slam, she placed the finished weapon on the table, and nodded her proudly.
"Time?" She asked, looking up towards a stallion holding a stopwatch.
"Minute and thirty seconds! New record for Apple Bloom!" He proclaimed ecstatically, and the crowd erupted into cheers. Apple Bloom smiled proudly, and caught sight of the still slack-jawed Shining Armor.
"Howdie Shinin'!" She said, waving him over as she started assembling another rifle. "Didja see what I did there!" She asked, and Shining nodded.
"Yeah...yeah I did!" He said, wide eyed. His eyes only got wider when he caught sight of the mark on her flank. "And I think you just got your cutie mark!" He said, wording the first thought that appeared in his head.
Apple Bloom's eyes grew to the size of dinner plates as she whipped her head around to stare at her flank, rolling up her sleeve just a little more. The symbol adorning it was a rifle and a hammer, directly in the center of a crosshairs. A brilliant smile exploded onto Apple Bloom.
"I GOT MAH CUTIE MARK!!!!!!"
Accidentally Implied Incest is funny
Still can't hear "Mistah Armor" without thinking of one "Mistah J", but that's just me.
Anyway, good chapter. I will go update TvTropes and I will be expecting more
Update!
Recap:
-Nice world building about the military.
-Applemour Shipping Fuel
-Applebloom got her cutie mark. And I'm not sure how AJ will react to her little sister getting a rather violent Cutie Mark.
All in all, a pretty good chapter. I look forward to more.
Also.
What would AB do in peace time?
Heh, not bad at all, I got a good feeling Applejack is going to be surprise that Apple Bloom got her cutie mark and mad if Apple Bloom end up staying, But that up to you.
Applebloom got a cutie mark in assembling guns...huh. Didn't see that coming.
Anyway, I hope things smooth out for you and your pal. Things must be hard right now.
Wooooooooh Update!
AB with a marines cutie mark, why not if she becomes the wintmare solider.
And while "not much happens" a great depth of world and charecter building is happening. Having a well imaged story that paces its events is far better then a story over focuses on events while skipping on the details that flesh out those event.
Hey, since the cutie marks of her family all have apples in them, why not have the knife blade look like an apple slice up close? You know, to keep Apple Family tradition? I'll cry if you don't do it!
I still say her Cutie mark makes no sense for what she did to get it. For me it's like Canon Rarity finding the gems only for her Cutie mark to be Wonderbolts.
3945135 I'll add a mallet or something then.
3945108
Trust me, I have a plan in mind. There's good reason why it has nothing to do with Apples.
How is Shining gonna get his flank out of this mess (Applejack is going to flip out because of it). Also, I can tell this is foreshadowing of Apple Bloom becoming Winter Filly. Now to figure out which of the next chapters has AJ become Captain Equestria (My bits are on 3 chapters from now, give or take a chapter).
3945860 Whoa you must have psychic powers, because I also guesstimate that it's about three chapters into the future
3945932 No, not psychic powers. Just access to a Phone Booth ( Rufus/George Carlin forgot to give me the manual to it before he died ), a Delorean, and a Police box (For your information, I used the Delorean. Because I didn't have time for one of the Doctors' random detours, maybe next time though )
I honestly didn't expect that.
I should know better by now.
3946519
I read the rest...
Have I ever told you how awesome you are?
Caus when you Magic School bus and Sherlock cannon I thought you were awesome.
Apple Bloom getting her Cutie Mark for infiltrating a government Facility and tricking a high level official into giving away information:
I spent ten minutes looking for Awesome memes before deciding to give you all of them.
3946566
1.bp.blogspot.com/-afxa35RSw0E/UX-lWSPLgfI/AAAAAAAALiI/-31RunFrm2A/s1600/the-rock-smiling.gif
3945860
Which will in turn allow for more Shipping fuel! Yay for my OTP!
that was great. CUTIE MARK IN GUNSMITHIN' YAY!
3944653
Assemble more weapons.
This is going to be a nightmare for AJ. Her sister has a cutie mark in gun building.
3948954 I'm just saying.
It doesn't seem like a very fruitful field to work during peace time.
3951187
There's always the next war.
3951198 I'm sure Applejack wouldn't approve of 'Bloom starting wars just to justify her cutie mark.
3951205
I wasn't saying Applebloom would start wars just to sell weapons....
That's an interesting...possibility.
Anyways, Ponies Make War.
3951220 Uh... Of course not!
That idea is just ludicrous.
Heh...
Yay, update!
Me: The only fixer upper fixer that can fix a fixer upper is...
This explains how she ends up the prisionor of Gustav in X-questrians.
3951220
Well, it makes sense, considering how Applebloom is Bucky's counterpart; she's going to need it.
She's going to start some Wars, I'd imagine, when she is captured, becomes a brainwashed assassin, critically wounds Shining Armor, takes down several N.E.I.G.H.S. Agents, and engages Captain Equestria.
(And yes, I am completely fangirling over the trailers for Captain America: The Winter Soldier; can you tell?)
4133150
I...what?
3949705
It gets worse: Applebloom is Bucky's counterpart.
Remember what happened to Bucky? That's probably going to happen to Applebloom, too.
*Hides fanart of Applebloom as the Winter Soldier.*
4133172
Long story short, Applebloom is probably going to be presumed dead, then found by the Soviet Expy, and will be brainwashed into becoming a ruthless, cold-blooded assassin.
It depends on whether or not the Author incorporates the Winter Soldier storyline into this; either this story, or the sequel.
The examples I mentioned come from the trailers for Captain America: The Winter Soldier.
4133191
I haven't seen trailers for movies. Being somethingsomething, I don't get out much. My handlers won't let me.
4133191 wow you must have psychic powers or something.
because that's exactly what I have in mind!
Excellent story! I really like how it is going so far and I love the little Shining/Applejack puppy love going on. I couldn't help but imagine Shining and Applejack getting to know each other better in an awkward, innocent sort of way. Before Shining Armor began to fall deeper into the shadows of Intel Ops and Applejack was put through the crucible and horrors of the frontline. Just two young ponies and a simple love story.
Of course things are never that easy and as the war goes on both of them not only can't find the time for each other but they start to move in different directions. Shining with more cloak and dagger black ops and mis-information and Applejack with the raw blood and gore of the battle field and hard truth of doing all you can to survive while trying to hold on to your ideals. The major split could come when Applejack finds out that Shining sent Applebloom with Applejack to tail her and do the jobs that Applejack couldn't do, specifically assassination of officers and POW's too dangerous to transport back to HQ. Applejack would be unyielding and stubborn in her honest and noble ways and Shining would see himself as having no choice but take look at things in a practical manner. He wouldn't have wanted to use Applebloom and would forever hate himself for doing so, but she would have not only volunteered but been the only one that Applejack would trust enough to keep her close to herself but never suspect.
But even with the romance over, they both rely and need each other too much. Ideals are great but they don't tell you what the enemy is up to nor send supplies and aid to the refugees you're freeing. Nor do they help much when a bullet tears through your buddy from a sniper you let escape because you couldn't finish them off when you had the chance. And for Shining, without a strong moral anchor it is too easy to convince yourself that the ends justify the means and begin sliding down a very slippery slope that results in you questioning whether or not you're any better than the ponies you're fighting against. Though that they could forge a bond built more on respect and admiration, Applejack could respect his ability to do what he has to even if it means making those hard decisions that leave you lying awake at night (she may not like it, but somepony had to make the call and bear the guilt and consequences). And Shining could admire Applejack's simple yet unbreakable hold on her conscience and morals in the face of seemingly unbeatable odds. And from there a strong friendship could be formed.
Yikes! Sorry I really got carried away. Anyway, thanks for writing this and I can't wait to see the next chapter. Good luck to you and best wishes!
4137206 @__@
Damn son.
Thats, like, the best comment I've seen on this story (or any story I've written really) ever.
Wow that is seriously something I'll have to consider incorporating into the atory. I mean, it serves all the purposes I have in mind, all while staying true to the characters.
DAMN SON
4133220
Really? Cool!
4133205
Here's a link to the Trailer:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7SlILk2WMTI
4137469
Wow! Thank you so much, that is such an honor!
You wrote a great story so far and I was struck by just how young both Shining and Applejack are at this point. Applejack is still fresh off the farm and Shining still probably crinkles from all the starch in his suit his mother irons it with. At this stage both of them are still far from the ponies they will grow to become and are just a couple of kids. A great starting point for an old fashioned love story between a boy and a girl.
And once the war really starts up we can see through them how war can age a person and damage them. And sometimes forms even stronger bonds than a simple teenage romance.
But wow, thank you again and I'm really glad that you seemed to like what I wrote. I was reading your Iron Mare story as well and while I'm surprised that you're redoing it, it looks great as well. You're really taking into account the personalities of the different ponies rather than just copy and pasting their names onto the marvel movie scrips. This is keeping the story familiar and yet I'm constantly guessing what will happen next! Though I would have liked to have seen Big Mac in a Happy/Pepper combined role with Rarity. As without Applejack to grow up around I figured the farm would have needed him to take on a higher paying job to support it and hire workers to cover for him and that the universe would have saddled him with a different head strong, brash, willful, yet fussier mare.
I better stop now before I get a swelled head though.
Anyway, thank you for taking on this enormous challenge of crossing over MLP and Marvel, with a little DC thrown in. Equestria First Class is amazing as well and I'm really interested in even the OC's and how they tie into all the other stories. Though the Spike - Coulson connection has me worried
Keep up the great work!
4141649 welcome buddy!
And fun fact: none of the major characters in my stories (asides from Hoofcuff in Flutterhulk), are OCs. Not that I don't like OCs, its just that I promised myself to avoid using them for major characters as much as possible or else it undermines the whole goal of making MLP into Marvel/DC.
But yeah, as for Shining and AJ, AJ is around 21 or so right now, and Shining is, at most, 23-25. So being you g and niaeve works in my facor, since they'll age up over the course of the story.
4142458
By the way, I know that there was a lot of controversy about Bucky being an assassin to Captain America when they first did the story line way back so I wasn't sure how you would take the idea of having Applebloom being a killer for Applejack's Captain Equestria. It would be interesting to see how she will develop later into a killer. What do you think her motivations could be? Could she side with Shining and agree that sometimes drastic measures need to be taken? Could she be doing it because she knows how much it destroys Applejack inside to take a life so she's actually trying to spare her and just got used to it? Could she just be trying to prove that she's a capable soldier as well as her sister? Maybe she's seen what these griffons have done and unlike Applejack, cannot see them as anything other than monsters? Perhaps a combination of factors. I really would like to see how you handle her transition to a pony the soviet expys would consider a good candidate to become the Winter Filly.
Since I doubt Applejack would be willing to let Bloom follow her on the battle field I'm also curious how Bloom will be able to tail Applejack. Perhaps part of the USO troupe that Applejack is part of that serves as her cover as Captain Equestria tours the front line? Aide de camp to Captain Equestria? Messenger to Applejack? Official OSI/NEIGH operative and go between for Shining Armor and Applejack to relay orders, intel, and equipment from Shining to Applejack?
I kind of like the last one as Applejack could think that Shining is keeping her sister out of trouble when he's actually secretly training her and feeding her information on targets and objectives that neither one want's Applejack to get mixed up with. Applejack could also bring to her the captured agents to be shipped back never knowing that some of those agents will never make it to HQ and instead end up dead in a ditch somewhere, as Bloom will be AJ's primary source of information.
Anyway, sorry to keep throwing ideas at you like this. Keep up the great work, I'm looking forward to your next chapter in either one of your stories! Wow, three stories at once! And that's not even counting how you were also writing Flutterhulk and Soar as well until recently!
4144608 No I love your ideas!
Just PM them from now on, since that way, we can talk as spoilery as we want, without ruining it for those who either don't want the spoilers or just aren't comic book experts like you and me.
And as for those ideas, I did give Apple Bloom a cutie mark in weaponry (it's exact meaning will be explained next chapter hopefully), so that's one excuse for why she becomes an assassin.
Also, in the comics at least, the reason the Commies chose Bucky was because they believed he had a version of the super soldier serum given to him too, however, once they discovered he didn't, they just decided to role with it and turn him into a cold blooded assassin.
In my verse, it's probably going to be a similar reason, and Gustav will be the one who brainwashed/trained her. As for if she becomes an assassin during the course of this story, that can work too, although I did originally envision her being a great Jack-of-All-Trades for the Howling Commandos.
4144916
Sure, I tried emailing you though at your gmail account and couldn't get through. How should I PM you?
4145144 Yeah, just use the PM system.
And in the case of my g-mail, it's godfourmetwo@gmail.com , and I really just use it to use Google Drive.
4181040 No, he isn't.
You can thank JB vonn Herb for that.
In hindsight (which is always 20/20), I should have kept that (but that would require changing the entire prologue, and its tone, which is kinda pointless in the long term)
4181092 Alright, then. Oh well. You could have him reveal in Harmony's Warriors that he was feigning complacency, but that might be a tad forced.
4181111 yeah it would.
I do kinda miss that element. Might make a blog post about it, since that's a rather important detail to the overall plot of the film.
4181111 yeah it would.
I do kinda miss that element. Might make a blog post about it, since that's a rather important detail to the overall plot of the film.
4181039 Watch them again. You'll spot the issues. Like Hulk lifting Mijolnir in the first movie.
4181039 Actually no don't watch them again. My need to be right made me forget they're still terrible.
4182770 Yeah it's gonna be an element.
However, it's going to be a little more simplified then my original idea, if by 'simplified' I mean that HYDRA is pure evil and is just using the whole equal rights thing as a diversion.
I blame my love of black and white morality.
Obviously I'm not abandoning the civil rights subtext, but it's going to be much less pronounced then I originally planned.
...
I dare not assume.